I'm sure I'm going to have some people with curiosity coming in based on that subject line, but I do have a serious question here. Granted, I'm not a spring chicken on the subject of swinging (I've been doing it for 5 yrs now), but this one issue seems to come up alot in situations with others.
Ok, so I'm getting ready to turn 30 in a month...so I was 25 when I first got involved in the lifestyle. At that time, I tried to find couples/singles who were around my age. No luck there, as there are few real single females around here, and most of the couples my age...the male half of the couple was all about some fmf action, but didn't want another guy near his girl. So I said...ok, lets try couples older than me. Two different problems seem to come up on this one...either the woman has older children who are near my age, and thinks it would be to weird...or the guy doesn't want his wife/gf with someone younger than him.
Any advice? I'm not trying to steal anyone's wife/gf away from them...just have a little fun.
Ok, so I'm getting ready to turn 30 in a month...so I was 25 when I first got involved in the lifestyle. At that time, I tried to find couples/singles who were around my age. No luck there, as there are few real single females around here, and most of the couples my age...the male half of the couple was all about some fmf action, but didn't want another guy near his girl. So I said...ok, lets try couples older than me. Two different problems seem to come up on this one...either the woman has older children who are near my age, and thinks it would be to weird...or the guy doesn't want his wife/gf with someone younger than him.
Any advice? I'm not trying to steal anyone's wife/gf away from them...just have a little fun.
how are you swinging if you are single?
We joined the lifestyle when I was 18 and he was 19, so I understand the trouble of finding people who will play with you. I still have that issue with some now that I'm 25 and he's 26. I don't think there's a solution to that problem, just don't give up. As for the "right age", the answer is: 18+ (I keeps it legal.) :P
SEXNFUN4EVERY1 wrote:
how are you swinging if you are single?
Seriously? You don't have to be part of couple to be in the lifestyle. The fact that a single person is there to enhance a swinging couple's sex life makes our presence here valid. Not every couple wants another couple. Now if you are a single person who is NOT interested in being sexual with a couple (define couple as you wish) then, yes, I would question their motives to be here. But the OP has stated he is there to have fun WITH couples.
To the OP.
I have no idea what the right age is....to me, personally, it's what you attracted to. I, personally am NOT attracted to people older then me, I PREFER younger people (in their 30s) or up to my age. I think 20 something yr olds make good eye candy but truth be told, Im kinda worried they'd kill me. LOL I appreciate stamina but like ABCMAN said, I DON'T want to be pounded for hours. That being said, I have found the exception to what I thought I would be attracted too....for instance I am going out tonight with a gentleman who is 6 yrs older then me but there is something I find very attractive about him. Perhaps it's the fact that I have taken the time to get to know him first in a unsexual way first. He's somebody I would explore and play with down the road for sure.
As long as the there is a MUTUAL attraction and chemistry, age shouldn't be an issue.
I have no idea what the right age is....to me, personally, it's what you attracted to. I, personally am NOT attracted to people older then me, I PREFER younger people (in their 30s) or up to my age. I think 20 something yr olds make good eye candy but truth be told, Im kinda worried they'd kill me. LOL I appreciate stamina but like ABCMAN said, I DON'T want to be pounded for hours. That being said, I have found the exception to what I thought I would be attracted too....for instance I am going out tonight with a gentleman who is 6 yrs older then me but there is something I find very attractive about him. Perhaps it's the fact that I have taken the time to get to know him first in a unsexual way first. He's somebody I would explore and play with down the road for sure.
As long as the there is a MUTUAL attraction and chemistry, age shouldn't be an issue.
BLUEEYESINUTAH wrote:SEXNFUN4EVERY1 wrote:Seriously? You don't have to be part of couple to be in the lifestyle. The fact that a single person is there to enhance a swinging couple's sex life makes our presence here valid. Not every couple wants another couple. Now if you are a single person who is NOT interested in being sexual with a couple (define couple as you wish) then, yes, I would question their motives to be here. But the OP has stated he is there to have fun WITH couples.
how are you swinging if you are single?
Yes, some couples seem to have the concepts of swinging and swapping mixed up. They seem to believe that as long as it's a "fair swap", it's ok, but heave forbid it be a situation where one half of the couple gets something with out the other getting something as well. I wish I had been in the lifestyle back in college...I could have written a very interesting paper for my psych classes...lol.
ABCMAN wrote:
LOL.. I really don't think it makes a difference. My wife likes em young and old. She just wants to have a good time, so don't brag about how good you are, or how long you can pound her. Reality is young guys that throw out what a stallion they are between the sheets are usually not as good as they think they are. That kind of is a red flag to her, and most woman do not want to be pounded for "Hours". Tips for Mrs ABC...just tell her you are a master of musical instruments, that will get her really hot and she won't care how old you are.
I take it you are referring to something a little more classy than the skin flute as well...lol.
I think it's that you're a single guy and most couples are looking for a woman to share or a couple to swap with. Whether the guy is threatened by your youth or the fact that you're male, I'd wager that's the issue. I'm not knocking singles in the lifestyle, nor do I discount their ability to be in it. But we are really only looking for females to share and couples to swap with ourselves.
Think of it as if you were a guy in a committed relationship. You have agreed to swing. Would you get jealous if she was getting all the action from you and some new dude, while you got nothing new? Would you want to see her with another guy, esp. when you don't have another girl to play with? Would you want a young stud coming in and doing your girl potentially better than you?
I'm not saying that's the situation, just thinking those could be the problems you're having to battle.
I'd suggest checking out other sites beyond this one to see if there are any folks there that might be more friendly to you.
Think of it as if you were a guy in a committed relationship. You have agreed to swing. Would you get jealous if she was getting all the action from you and some new dude, while you got nothing new? Would you want to see her with another guy, esp. when you don't have another girl to play with? Would you want a young stud coming in and doing your girl potentially better than you?
I'm not saying that's the situation, just thinking those could be the problems you're having to battle.
I'd suggest checking out other sites beyond this one to see if there are any folks there that might be more friendly to you.
COUPLINUT wrote:
Well gotta agree with blue and fe2 the hubby and I only do woman cause well thats what I prefer and we do get some pretty rude people about it and have been asked that same question. We have met some really amazing couples on here who really respect us for us. Swinging for us is bringing a third (female). I always thought swinging just ment more than two or just people who love to have great sex. Gotta be honest every now and then I need a break from the eight inches i get LOL. But honestly male female and couples we have met are awesome. Although we only play with females we truly enjoy partying with everyone and having fun is key for us. I better stop now I think the ADHD is kicking in LMAO blue knows what I mean lol
Gina
ROFLMAO. Yep. ohhh look....shiney things! Can you imagine how bad it would be with diamond studded nipples or clits? Altho, I did have the pleasure of cock with a STEEL in it. Yep. Totally pierced and totally hot. uh, what were talking about again?
FUNINOCALA wrote:
I think it's that you're a single guy and most couples are looking for a woman to share or a couple to swap with. Whether the guy is threatened by your youth or the fact that you're male, I'd wager that's the issue. I'm not knocking singles in the lifestyle, nor do I discount their ability to be in it. But we are really only looking for females to share and couples to swap with ourselves. Think of it as if you were a guy in a committed relationship. You have agreed to swing. Would you get jealous if she was getting all the action from you and some new dude, while you got nothing new? Would you want to see her with another guy, esp. when you don't have another girl to play with? Would you want a young stud coming in and doing your girl potentially better than you? I'm not saying that's the situation, just thinking those could be the problems you're having to battle. I'd suggest checking out other sites beyond this one to see if there are any folks there that might be more friendly to you.
Well I was the male half in a couple once, but that ended for other reasons, and hope to be again some day. Yes, I would want to get some fun myself as well, but I would like to think that I wouldn't be keeping count, and saying "you're getting more action than me, so no more". I would like to think I was in a relationship where I tried to do things that she got enjoyment out of and she would do the same for me. As far as the other guy coming in and doing a better job than me...the way I look at it, it's like this...a fuck buddy is just that...as long as it's about the sex, once the sex ends, all that matters is who you go home with. In my opinion, if one half of a couple is afraid of someone getting in the middle of their relationship...the lifestyle isn't for them.
Btw, I've been a member of other sites outside of this one for 5 yrs...mainly the same people on each site.
UNCUT1761 wrote:
Since the question is about " the right age ". And since I have been in this world a fairly long time. I can tell you from my personal experience " the right age " has always been whatever age I wasn't at that particular time. Now while that may sound humorous, there have in fact over the years, been times when I met people and if I was older we probably would have gotten together, and there has been couples where it was, Boy do I wish I was their age again. Bottom line is, be nice. don't push your way in if you weren't invited and if you are going to a local club, before toolong the regulars will figure out that you are a nice guy and they will start inviting you to join them.
Unfortunately, there are no clubs in NC that allow single males. The closest "SM friendly" club I have found is approx 150 miles away from me.
Damn, I'm now considered in the older group. Wow, that is eye opening.
The perfect age is the age you are and what you make of it.
Mav
The perfect age is the age you are and what you make of it.
Mav
This is my female perspective from part of the "older group" - I'm drawn to men who are self-assured and mature - one who is able to carry on an intelligent conversation where the length of his penis or the size of my tits are not the topics of discussion. I don't get turned on by the arrogant guy who doesn't know when to cut himself off (which would be a good thing to learn because we all know what too much alcohol does to "mr. winky"). . . turns out they (the obnoxious ones) come in all shapes, ages, and styles . . . for that matter singles and part of couples . . . actually, women too. The whole, "I'm the best thing since slided bread" is also a real turn off for me . . . just be good, be damn good, good enough to make me growl and I'll be happy!
So, for me, if you act like my 14 y.o. son or my daughter's 19 y.o. guy friends, I'm likely to be turned off . . . not necessarily because of your age, but because you are acting like a 2 year old ;>
So, for me, if you act like my 14 y.o. son or my daughter's 19 y.o. guy friends, I'm likely to be turned off . . . not necessarily because of your age, but because you are acting like a 2 year old ;>