We have been member for only about 6 months and the number of single males invading the site has grown exponentially. We know that they play a role in the lifestyle but come on Admin. Chat has become a haven for "trolls and lurkers" without pics and INTELLIGENT CONVERSATION. THIS SITE WAS PERFECT but now it is becoming like so many PORN SITES. Dudes just looking to jack off to my wife on cam. Please limit their numbers or I fear many of us will leave and find another site that has a couples best interest in mind.
BTW it has been great. Please don't let the atmosphere deteriorate!
My suggestion would be to limit the number of SM in chat at any given time.
Thank You
Brent & Marie
BTW it has been great. Please don't let the atmosphere deteriorate!
My suggestion would be to limit the number of SM in chat at any given time.
Thank You
Brent & Marie
VELCROCHIN wrote:
Please limit their numbers or I fear many of us will leave and find another site that has a couples best interest in mind
Good luck with your search, most of the sites we belong to are about the same; actually Swingular is MUCH more pleasant than some of the "other" adult sites.
Like T4 said...you can block whomever you want or simply ignore them. It's not just an issue with the SM's...some of the males in so-called "couples" have been an issue in the past too (and no, I'm not generalizing this into just a male-based phenomenon). There will always be those that offend and lack basic tact...of BOTH genders.
Ultimately it's up to us to moderate our own in the chatroom.
~J
This site is no different than any other swingers site. I'm afraid that you will find good and bad in all groups, be it single males, single females, or couples. There are those that give their perspective groups a bad name, but unfortunately, little can be done about it, as it can be hard to verify who is for real and what someone's intentions are, without knowing them in person.
In my time in the lifestyle, I have observed...single males who were actually in relationships but looking for secret side action, single females, who seem to have a husband/bf who's looking to join...but she still lists as single, and couples who believe that simply because they bring someone along to a party...it gives them free range to do as they please. On the flip side, I have met some very nice people from all 3 groups as well.
My point is...all 3 of these groups have their roles in the lifestyle, but until a foolproof way comes along of determining who's for real and who's not...we will all have to deal with the good and the bad. As others have mentioned though...if you are object to a particular group and don't want to hear anything from members of that group...block/ignore them. Just remember that you are throwing out the good along with the bad.
In my time in the lifestyle, I have observed...single males who were actually in relationships but looking for secret side action, single females, who seem to have a husband/bf who's looking to join...but she still lists as single, and couples who believe that simply because they bring someone along to a party...it gives them free range to do as they please. On the flip side, I have met some very nice people from all 3 groups as well.
My point is...all 3 of these groups have their roles in the lifestyle, but until a foolproof way comes along of determining who's for real and who's not...we will all have to deal with the good and the bad. As others have mentioned though...if you are object to a particular group and don't want to hear anything from members of that group...block/ignore them. Just remember that you are throwing out the good along with the bad.
Here we go AGAIN - yet another highly opinionated, elitist attitude rears its ugly head.
("Swingular is just for me and people EXACTLY like me - all others should be banned")
Let's see now, the last 762 of them have had "ANTI SINGLE MALES" as their theme.
So, what shall we target next?
Hmmmmmmmmm....................
I KNOW - how about we bash SINGLE MALES this time, just for a change?
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
("Swingular is just for me and people EXACTLY like me - all others should be banned")
Let's see now, the last 762 of them have had "ANTI SINGLE MALES" as their theme.
So, what shall we target next?
Hmmmmmmmmm....................
I KNOW - how about we bash SINGLE MALES this time, just for a change?
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Single Males: We've came to the decision that the so called "Single Men," are just what they are and cannot find a Date, so they try and rely on couples, especilly the women to "THINK," they almost had a date. However, way it is I guess. There are those that "CAN," and then there are those that "CAN'T" and the Single Guy is for certain in the, "Can't Find A Date," class.
A & H
A & H
2OFUS, is that an opinion - or can you substantiate what you say about single guys with reliable, statistical documentation?
2OFUS wrote:
Single Males: We've came to the decision that the so called "Single Men," are just what they are and cannot find a Date, so they try and rely on couples, especilly the women to "THINK," they almost had a date. However, way it is I guess. There are those that "CAN," and then there are those that "CAN'T" and the Single Guy is for certain in the, "Can't Find A Date," class.
A & H
OMG! Are you fucking serious? Are you telling me that a single guy can't at all be interested in MMF/FFM/MMFF/etc at all? It's just a pathetic cry on their part for a roll in the hay with anyone that will have them? I didnt' know that women owned the market on group sex. Wow. With that narrow minded fucked up thinking I'm surprised you got laid yourself. Ever.
CHRISTINE20032 wrote:
I don't think that you should target the single males because to be quite honest some of the male half of the couples are just as bad if not worse then the single males. Sorry just my opinion
Oh, so been there.
2OFUS wrote:
Single Males: We've came to the decision that the so called "Single Men," are just what they are and cannot find a Date, so they try and rely on couples, especilly the women to "THINK," they almost had a date. However, way it is I guess. There are those that "CAN," and then there are those that "CAN'T" and the Single Guy is for certain in the, "Can't Find A Date," class. A & H
LMAO...REALLY? I'm curious, by your reasoning, to know your explanation for why single females and couples are in the lifestyle at all.
CHRISTINE20032 wrote:
I don't think that you should target the single males because to be quite honest some of the male half of the couples are just as bad if not worse then the single males. Sorry just my opinion
Thank You! Yes, they can be. I have been to parties before where the male halves of couples believed that they had free range to do as they pleased because they brought women along with them. A single male's chances of play are based on his own actions and efforts...not on expecting to get something simply because he's bringing a woman to the party.
I block ANYBODY that has repeatedly made himself/herself/themselves annoying, obnoxious, and/or rude. And I have more married males (who's wives ARE around and part of the couple's playtime) act inappropriately than I've had single males. But yeah... if someone is acting obnoxious and I don't wanna hear it (or read it I guess), I use the block button. Works wonderfully.
And for the other topic that's surfaced. Plenty of these single men can find dates. They just choose swingers due to their sexual preference. If you wanna get rude and say single men are here cuz they need to steal someone else's girl... couldn't this also go for married men? Or the women for that matter? Seriously. We're all here cuz we have this particular sexual preference. Now play nice and block those that don't know how. :P
And for the other topic that's surfaced. Plenty of these single men can find dates. They just choose swingers due to their sexual preference. If you wanna get rude and say single men are here cuz they need to steal someone else's girl... couldn't this also go for married men? Or the women for that matter? Seriously. We're all here cuz we have this particular sexual preference. Now play nice and block those that don't know how. :P
as a single male i have always tried to be the utmost gentleman i can to everyone, especially the ladies.
I would like to take a min. if i have offended any one i am sorry.
koi
I would like to take a min. if i have offended any one i am sorry.
koi
Is there any correlation to the time the offending user has been on the site? I would guess that would have something to do with their etiquette as well. Just guessing.
HelloKitty: go ahead and ban me baby. It would just turn me on more! OH, you said ban. I thought you said spank. Damn.
2OFUS: Wow, pretty brave talk coming from someone with no profile pictures what-so-ever. Hmmm, I say we start bashing people without profile pictures of any kind. BASH BASH BASH... lol
Mav
HelloKitty: go ahead and ban me baby. It would just turn me on more! OH, you said ban. I thought you said spank. Damn.
2OFUS: Wow, pretty brave talk coming from someone with no profile pictures what-so-ever. Hmmm, I say we start bashing people without profile pictures of any kind. BASH BASH BASH... lol
Mav
mav: you know... if you'd ever bother talking to me. lmao.
:::SIGH:::
While I do understand how some single guys can ruin things for the rest of us, bashing singles JUST for being single seems a little heavy handed. I have been in swinging for many years - both as a single man and as part of a couple. While single men are a dime a dozen, we do have our uses in the community and not all of us are a$$hats. I have gone into chat a few times, and I've always tried to treat everyone with the respect they deserve and with a little decorum. I guess I just wanted to point out not ALL single men are the issue - the a$$hats are, and you have those in every group
Just my two cents.
While I do understand how some single guys can ruin things for the rest of us, bashing singles JUST for being single seems a little heavy handed. I have been in swinging for many years - both as a single man and as part of a couple. While single men are a dime a dozen, we do have our uses in the community and not all of us are a$$hats. I have gone into chat a few times, and I've always tried to treat everyone with the respect they deserve and with a little decorum. I guess I just wanted to point out not ALL single men are the issue - the a$$hats are, and you have those in every group
Just my two cents.
I do agree that the number of single males on the site are getting out of hand. Yes Single males do play a MINOR part in the lifestyle, but the lifestyle in our opinion is focused around couples. But when 17 of 20 members in the chat room are single males thats getting out of hand. Blocking them ourselves isn't going to do anything because they still remain in the chat room and will most likely deter some couples from wanting to be in the chatroom.
If this problem really is as rampant as many seem to think, a novel solution would be a social moderation system. If someone is being an a$shat, mod them down. Everyone should have the ability to set their moderation threshold; such that emails, IM's, messages in the chat, etc.. Aren't visible from people below your threshold settings.
To prevent systemic abuse, limit the amount of times a person/couple can moderate per week (or per month). That way if a person acts without any respect, they'll tend to be automatically ignored. If you have a problem with that kind of system, just disable your threshold.
This isn't my idea, as its implemented on many community sites. It tends to work exceptionally well; especially if there's also a metamoderation system in place.
-Mr. Deval-X
To prevent systemic abuse, limit the amount of times a person/couple can moderate per week (or per month). That way if a person acts without any respect, they'll tend to be automatically ignored. If you have a problem with that kind of system, just disable your threshold.
This isn't my idea, as its implemented on many community sites. It tends to work exceptionally well; especially if there's also a metamoderation system in place.
-Mr. Deval-X
Oh MY Hell! Are we doing this yet again? There are good and bad single men, just like there are bitchy untouchable, by anyone, single women and couples. We all know who they are and those of us who are "smrt" just ignore them. What is so hard about that? This topic used to be funny. Now its plain annoying, just like the "bitchy untouchable by anyone single women and couples". Just my opinion as a single male. Everyone else please get "smrt" and get over it! Jebus Krist already. lol
lol I don't know what the OP problem is this site is the most anti-single male swinger site I've been to. I've been here for a while and this is the only site that I've visited that actually turns me off the lifestyle.
And to the guys you mention on chat that are jerking off to your wife, well #1 isn't there a wild chat room, go there if you want to get crazy with another couple #2 most of the guys on chat are the male counter parts in a couple (btw most of the regulars are cool and funny)
Sometimes I am jealous that most of the members here are from utah since there is pretty much no chance for me to play, but sometimes I'm glad since some people here are such jerk offs that I wouldn't even talk to you if you were next to me in a check stand.
BTW, there are probably just as many husbands out there that don't even try or give respect to other peoples wives since they already expect that they are going to get laid.
OP maybe you're not really into this lifestyle, you should ask yourself this question; Am I into this lifestyle because I like to see my wife with another man or am I into this lifestyle just so I can sleep with other women other than my wife.
And to the guys you mention on chat that are jerking off to your wife, well #1 isn't there a wild chat room, go there if you want to get crazy with another couple #2 most of the guys on chat are the male counter parts in a couple (btw most of the regulars are cool and funny)
Sometimes I am jealous that most of the members here are from utah since there is pretty much no chance for me to play, but sometimes I'm glad since some people here are such jerk offs that I wouldn't even talk to you if you were next to me in a check stand.
BTW, there are probably just as many husbands out there that don't even try or give respect to other peoples wives since they already expect that they are going to get laid.
OP maybe you're not really into this lifestyle, you should ask yourself this question; Am I into this lifestyle because I like to see my wife with another man or am I into this lifestyle just so I can sleep with other women other than my wife.
SNEAKYBASTARD wrote:
OP maybe you're not really into this lifestyle, you should ask yourself this question; Am I into this lifestyle because I like to see my wife with another man or am I into this lifestyle just so I can sleep with other women other than my wife.
False dilemma and strawman.. Are you actively just trying to attack the OP?
ABCMAN, take 2 "atta boys" out of petty cash.
I've lost count of how many people I've said hello to only to be ignored.
It's a simple greeting - it's not like I'm asking their permission to fuck their parakeet.
Last time I checked - you can't contract a STD by responding back to a friendly "hello".
But then, that's just the opinion of a low life single male.
I've lost count of how many people I've said hello to only to be ignored.
It's a simple greeting - it's not like I'm asking their permission to fuck their parakeet.
Last time I checked - you can't contract a STD by responding back to a friendly "hello".
But then, that's just the opinion of a low life single male.
False dilemma and strawman.. Are you actively just trying to attack the OP?
yes probably, I was just flustered when I wrote the my response.
I would like to see something for the few of us single guys that understand the etiquette of the lifestyle and respect it to be recognised. Perhaps a way to search for sm that have positive comments from certified couples and/or sf?? As for the comment earlier that sm are just here because they can't find a date---lmao! No! I go on lots of dates. What I can't find are women who are okay with the lifestyle and up for venturing into it with me at any other venue here in planet Utah. I've been in and out of the lifestyle for over 10 yrs. It turns out that I have to LEAVE the lifestyle whenever I get into a relationship. All of my experience in the lifestyle has been as a sm. It's quite annoying really. Especially because of the stigma that we have here.
Single Males--just so you know, the only way to get any play in the lifestyle--networking and word of mouth. Nobody wants to watch you jack off, nobody wants your cock pick, and nobody wants your unsolicited sexual advances. Be respectful, leave sex out of your end of any interaction until you receive some sort of cue that it is wanted, and you might, MIGHT, have a little fun around here.
Single Males--just so you know, the only way to get any play in the lifestyle--networking and word of mouth. Nobody wants to watch you jack off, nobody wants your cock pick, and nobody wants your unsolicited sexual advances. Be respectful, leave sex out of your end of any interaction until you receive some sort of cue that it is wanted, and you might, MIGHT, have a little fun around here.
A couple of things:
1.) How many 'let's bash single males' threads do we need?
FUCK ME RUNNING! If you don't want single males, block them, ignore them, and take what contact slips through as a compliment.
2.) Everyone calls single females unicorns as they don't exists.
Why? Because your standards, fantasies, and self absorbed desires are so strict that you can't find one?
Having been swinging for 5-6 years now, I can attest that there's more than enough single females to go around, at least once per month we met one.
If you're having a hard time finding one, look in the mirror.
3.) The single male issue, they take liberties and such.
BULL SHIT!
In the 5-6 years of participating in the lifestyle, we've had ONE, yes, ONE, single male overstep his bounds, it was somewhat understandable. It was his first time in a club, he was in a group of experienced males, and they egged him on. We spoke to him and he learned what's acceptable and what is not.
HOWEVER, men with a date, wife or girlfriend........
Yeah, those are the ones you have to watch out for. They're the ones who will come up and paw the ladies, try to kiss them, try to join in uninvited, etc. They act as if they're thinking, 'Hey, I brought my ticket (my girl), so I can do anything I want!' These are the guys who give the single males a bad name.
The bad single guys are not sucessful in the lifestyle, so they do not stick around long. If every time you tried to strike up a conversation, email someone, or whatever you were shot down, ignored, or yelled at for having the audacity to contact someone, would you stick around?
4.) Keep your profile up to date.
If you do not want single males, make sure it says that on your profile. You don't know how many times I have done a search for any given area and the profiles come up saying that you seek single males, then when reading it, you repeatedly say, 'NO SINGLE MALES!' why do you have to repeat it? Because you're to dense to put it in your 'quick view!'
Finally, get over yourself, no one (aside from SirenSextress, I think, Thoughtgarden's wife) is that fucking hot!
1.) How many 'let's bash single males' threads do we need?
FUCK ME RUNNING! If you don't want single males, block them, ignore them, and take what contact slips through as a compliment.
2.) Everyone calls single females unicorns as they don't exists.
Why? Because your standards, fantasies, and self absorbed desires are so strict that you can't find one?
Having been swinging for 5-6 years now, I can attest that there's more than enough single females to go around, at least once per month we met one.
If you're having a hard time finding one, look in the mirror.
3.) The single male issue, they take liberties and such.
BULL SHIT!
In the 5-6 years of participating in the lifestyle, we've had ONE, yes, ONE, single male overstep his bounds, it was somewhat understandable. It was his first time in a club, he was in a group of experienced males, and they egged him on. We spoke to him and he learned what's acceptable and what is not.
HOWEVER, men with a date, wife or girlfriend........
Yeah, those are the ones you have to watch out for. They're the ones who will come up and paw the ladies, try to kiss them, try to join in uninvited, etc. They act as if they're thinking, 'Hey, I brought my ticket (my girl), so I can do anything I want!' These are the guys who give the single males a bad name.
The bad single guys are not sucessful in the lifestyle, so they do not stick around long. If every time you tried to strike up a conversation, email someone, or whatever you were shot down, ignored, or yelled at for having the audacity to contact someone, would you stick around?
4.) Keep your profile up to date.
If you do not want single males, make sure it says that on your profile. You don't know how many times I have done a search for any given area and the profiles come up saying that you seek single males, then when reading it, you repeatedly say, 'NO SINGLE MALES!' why do you have to repeat it? Because you're to dense to put it in your 'quick view!'
Finally, get over yourself, no one (aside from SirenSextress, I think, Thoughtgarden's wife) is that fucking hot!
There is a couples only room in chat. Obviously most people don't care enough to use it.
Why does the tittle of this topic say "Single Males vs. Unicorns" when the original poster did not say one single thing about "unicorns"...just another way to single male bash...gawd it gets old!! Kisses...Naugh-Ty
why do we have to have postings in forums that are stupid and pointless like this our opinion there bad of all types theres good of all types and the more members on this site the better more to meet and more to have some fun with all you have to do is block those who offend you thats what we do problem solved!!!!!!!!!!
wow i never reply to these and i rarely chat and i dont contact people ever that are not looking for single males . as a matter of fact i rarely contact anyone . but i had to respond to this thread . it just shows your ignorance and backwoods attitude to generalize all single males . please do, go find another site . this one wouldn't miss you .
I personally think these topics provide a lot of insight; in particular regarding other's reactions to the topic. Knowing the decorum and politeness of a persons response to such a topic can tell you much about how well you're likely to get along with them in subsequent encounters.
This has been our primary means of separating the chaff from the wheat on this site the entire time we've been here. Sure, it can get ugly and personal; but where else are you gonna find this perspective? Tell me where you're going to find a better one?
This has been our primary means of separating the chaff from the wheat on this site the entire time we've been here. Sure, it can get ugly and personal; but where else are you gonna find this perspective? Tell me where you're going to find a better one?
NAUGHTYGIRL101 wrote:
Why does the tittle of this topic say "Single Males vs. Unicorns"
Beats me, I thought the OP was gonna propose a cagefight deathmatch
My money was on the unicorns, those horns...
Imagine my surprise
seriously? do you have any idea what side you bread is buttered on? what do you think keeps this website alive? what is it that you think makes it possible for people like you and us to meet other couples into the same things we are.... oh yes.... this website! and this coming from a couple that isn't even looking for single females. let alone a single male. basically, if you dont like it, find another place to hang out, you are complaining about a website that you paid to join.... not sure exactly who that complaint reflects upon... either way, enjoy the work others do to help you and accept the bad that comes with the good for the common cause.
I'm a widowed male, not a single male. My wife and I were in lifestyle together for many years before she died. The club we joined "put me out" two weeks after her death because I was "a single male" and they didn't allow single males. I maintained my connection to the lifestyle by participating in private parties with those who knew us both. I still engage in private activities as there is less condecension and the people are not hypocrites. I've been a member on this site for over 4 years and there isn't a couple here who has ever complained about me. I'm not a hunk, or young and handsome, just an ordinary guy who loves the lifestyle.
Yman - furry beast of the Pacific NW.
Yman - furry beast of the Pacific NW.
YMAN48, excellent post!
We think there should be a "BAN" on this subject!!!
We think there should be a "BAN" on this subject!!!
Just a reminder, that you, the members, have the power to remove this topic. Just vote it down by clicking the the thumbs down voting icon. If enough votes come in, the topic will automatically get deleted.
Oh, BTW, for those who complain about the Single Males in chat, there is a COUPLES ONLY chat room.
Oh, BTW, for those who complain about the Single Males in chat, there is a COUPLES ONLY chat room.
Nice going, I just read through this entire post and it took away valuable time jacking off to VELCROCHIN's wife on cam!
ADMINISTRATOR wrote:
Just a reminder, that you, the members, have the power to remove this topic. Just vote it down by clicking the the thumbs down voting icon. If enough votes come in, the topic will automatically get deleted.
wait, does voting down remove the entire thread, or just individual comments?
If you mod down the original post with enough thumbs down, then does that remove the whole thread?
It just never ceases to amaze. For an "open minded" group, there is so much narrow mindedness and hypocrisy being espoused.
I know that many people do not agree with my situation, but I am very upfront about it. Yet I can't tell you how many times I have had married women or other married guys approach me about wanting to do exactly what I'm doing...yes even some that profess differently in these forums.
Or how about those that play on here, single or married, and then try to maintain that they are practicing Mormonism or some other religious tenet. This lifestyle is not approved of by any mainstream religion that I know of.
For God's sake, the majority of society would revile us for what any of us are doing.
So why don't we all just do what is comfortable and acceptable for US. Yes some cheat, some are into sexual practices (like jacking off on cam in the chat room, oh my god), or talking dirty in the chat room, or licking the feet of dwarfs while they ride a donkey, or whatever. If you don't like it, don't look or don't talk to them. On the flip side, if someone isn't into it, leave them the fuck alone, go find the person that is into what you are...there are still plenty of them out there.
Can we all just get over the judgmental diatribe finally?
I know that many people do not agree with my situation, but I am very upfront about it. Yet I can't tell you how many times I have had married women or other married guys approach me about wanting to do exactly what I'm doing...yes even some that profess differently in these forums.
Or how about those that play on here, single or married, and then try to maintain that they are practicing Mormonism or some other religious tenet. This lifestyle is not approved of by any mainstream religion that I know of.
For God's sake, the majority of society would revile us for what any of us are doing.
So why don't we all just do what is comfortable and acceptable for US. Yes some cheat, some are into sexual practices (like jacking off on cam in the chat room, oh my god), or talking dirty in the chat room, or licking the feet of dwarfs while they ride a donkey, or whatever. If you don't like it, don't look or don't talk to them. On the flip side, if someone isn't into it, leave them the fuck alone, go find the person that is into what you are...there are still plenty of them out there.
Can we all just get over the judgmental diatribe finally?
Single males are hot and I think watching a guy jerk off is a huge turn on! Depending on the attraction, of course. 
The Mrs.
The Mrs.
TOMSCIRCUS wrote:
Nice going, I just read through this entire post and it took away valuable time jacking off to VELCROCHIN's wife on cam!
Ummm...Thank you....No. Too much attitude.
Maybe Velchrochin should try AFF I here for $9.95 a month the provide a adult swinger site without an excess of single males, fake unicorns or other distractions.
Bob
Bob