What is it with friend requests out of nowhere? We get several a day that are not accompanied with any message, just the request. Are we being rude to just delete without replying.
Some of the folks we might like to get to know, yet were not sure what is expected when we get a random friends request.
Should we create a friends album with say one picture in it to satisfy the picture collectors, the use a separate album for folks we have met and hang out with regularly?
We don't want to be rude! any ideas....
Some of the folks we might like to get to know, yet were not sure what is expected when we get a random friends request.
Should we create a friends album with say one picture in it to satisfy the picture collectors, the use a separate album for folks we have met and hang out with regularly?
We don't want to be rude! any ideas....
I don't think you are being rude by ignoring the requests from people who do not send you a message or especially from people do not have pictures in their private album, yet they want to see yours.
I never just send a friend request without having sent a message. Usually, I wait until I have messaged with someone a few times before I send the request, but many times, as part of my introduction to them, I let them know that I am sending a friend request so they can see my private album in order to get a better idea of what I look like. In my mind it's a good way to let them know that I am interested and that I'd like them to see my pics so they can decide if they want to continue messaging. They always have the option of accepting my friend request, looking at my private album and then removing me from their friends list should they decide that they do not think we would have any chemistry.
I never just send a friend request without having sent a message. Usually, I wait until I have messaged with someone a few times before I send the request, but many times, as part of my introduction to them, I let them know that I am sending a friend request so they can see my private album in order to get a better idea of what I look like. In my mind it's a good way to let them know that I am interested and that I'd like them to see my pics so they can decide if they want to continue messaging. They always have the option of accepting my friend request, looking at my private album and then removing me from their friends list should they decide that they do not think we would have any chemistry.
We posted a new pic of my wife and got dozens of requests from people we don't know. Then posted under Booty Call and we were once again slammed. Single guys we will never add you. Please stop asking.
I tried to 'sail' this idea once before (it didn't float):
I believe it would be a great enhancement to have a Message Box be a required field in order to send a friend request. If a person 'enters' "whedbfhfbvihbvpihfv", that still says more about the person than no comment at all.
When we receive a friend request from an unknown party (we get quite a few), and there is no accompanying personal message, we rarely open it. If it's from more than 100 miles away, we NEVER open it.
I believe it would be a great enhancement to have a Message Box be a required field in order to send a friend request. If a person 'enters' "whedbfhfbvihbvpihfv", that still says more about the person than no comment at all.
When we receive a friend request from an unknown party (we get quite a few), and there is no accompanying personal message, we rarely open it. If it's from more than 100 miles away, we NEVER open it.
SimplePleasures,
We get similar requests. I don't think it will ever go away with the current system. The message box is a nice idea.
You have details of how to contact you in your profile, so if people decide not to read it, then you are not required to add them. By the way, we love habits too.
CB & KB
We get similar requests. I don't think it will ever go away with the current system. The message box is a nice idea.
You have details of how to contact you in your profile, so if people decide not to read it, then you are not required to add them. By the way, we love habits too.
CB & KB
with the new format, not opening it doesn't get rid of it,you still have to go to the home page and delete it there as well. so we get to be annoyed twice.
Simples..
Simples..
We respond with: Decline read our profile!
We always thought the reason for the private pic area was so people that were interested in each other could see pics that show what you really look like. Not here it seems the reason is for people who want to show nothing can send you an invite & check you out while showing no more than they have in their public album. That is if they even have any private pics. I'd say at least 80% have none or very few which still gives no idea what they really look like. We just assume the husband or single needs jack off material. We have sent several emails to people who have sent invites saying if they would like to get to know us send an email & a full pic. I don't think anyone responded at all. Of course may have needed protective glasses to look at their pics anyway.
Yeah seems to be a trend, notice more and more people are having to put something in their profiles regarding the issue. We have at least gotten less of it that way. The another oddity I find is that even when you decline the invitation you get the same ones over and over, obvious pic hunters.
Something we have found being kind of new to this is, even after reading profiles, sending a message, and then asking for friendship we still do not get a response. Now we understand that we may not get people pounding at our door and pleading for our company anyways, but it has been a struggle for us in this lifestyle. We do not "collect" pictures (but we sure do like to look at them
) and we search for people that we are attracted to and that have the same interests as ours.Now we understand we do not have many pictures and no personal pictures to share, not because we are being secretive or hiding anything, but mostly because we are busy and the better half (her) is more talented with pictures,computers, and files than I. We have met some couples at meet and greets and chatted a few times with some here, but nothing to write a book about. So from the "newbies" side, it's hard to not just throw out a line and "fish" by clicking on friendship just to see what happens. Heres to hoping we can find a nibble!
) and we search for people that we are attracted to and that have the same interests as ours.Now we understand we do not have many pictures and no personal pictures to share, not because we are being secretive or hiding anything, but mostly because we are busy and the better half (her) is more talented with pictures,computers, and files than I. We have met some couples at meet and greets and chatted a few times with some here, but nothing to write a book about. So from the "newbies" side, it's hard to not just throw out a line and "fish" by clicking on friendship just to see what happens. Heres to hoping we can find a nibble! Our profile clearly states in the first paragraph do NOT send us a "friends requests" without any previous conversation or at least explain why we need a friend in Butte Montana. I just deleted 19 "friend requests" that have accumulated over the past month. It must be our blocked out faces that turn so many on they don't care what we have to say in our profile OR what we look like. These friend requests come from both couples and single men.
I would suggest these folks go to the wizard and ask for a brain but you know damn well they don't read the forum either.
I would suggest these folks go to the wizard and ask for a brain but you know damn well they don't read the forum either.
So what I need to do is corral all these little fuggers and put them in "friends request" purgatory will they will remain until the end of time. Sounds like a winner to me thanks for the tip!
(Which I could bring back the 19 I just deleted that would be a nice group to start my collection)
(Which I could bring back the 19 I just deleted that would be a nice group to start my collection)
Hi 
We are very new to all of this, and still not sure how involved we want to get yet, but we are very big voyers. We enjoy seeing all the sexy people out there and it does turn us on very much. Maybe it gives us a little confidence. We enjoy letting others view our private pics as well, as long as we get to see theirs. We get a lot of people (who knows if they are a real couple or not) who want to see our private pics, but either have none of their own, or don't let us see them. This is a no go for us. We really hope that anyone we have asked to see their private pics are not offended. Chances are we have enjoyed ourselves while looking at your sexy pics, and we hope you have enjoyed ours as well. It's nice to see the concern here though, and the ideas on how to keep fakes at bay are welcome as well. Also, we just had our new baby a couple weeks ago! After things get back to normal, we will have some NEW pics, and maybe some video to share Maybe even be steaming up the video chat room soon! Be sexy all.
We are very new to all of this, and still not sure how involved we want to get yet, but we are very big voyers. We enjoy seeing all the sexy people out there and it does turn us on very much. Maybe it gives us a little confidence. We enjoy letting others view our private pics as well, as long as we get to see theirs. We get a lot of people (who knows if they are a real couple or not) who want to see our private pics, but either have none of their own, or don't let us see them. This is a no go for us. We really hope that anyone we have asked to see their private pics are not offended. Chances are we have enjoyed ourselves while looking at your sexy pics, and we hope you have enjoyed ours as well. It's nice to see the concern here though, and the ideas on how to keep fakes at bay are welcome as well. Also, we just had our new baby a couple weeks ago! After things get back to normal, we will have some NEW pics, and maybe some video to share
Maybe even be steaming up the video chat room soon! Be sexy all.INDEP0102 wrote:
I've found that a few people are also really shy, and just clicking on the "invite friends" button is a really big deal for them. I concur that some sort of a message requirement would be a good move.
Agreed.
This has happened/happens on every website we belong to. Not everyone understands or cares to understand what many consider to be proper etiquette when it comes to what may be as simple as saying "hi".
Those of you that believe this is something that this happens exclusively on Swingular need to get out more often, haha....
We have always thought that it would be very nice to have a "wink", "kiss", or "flirt" feature on this site, which is simply used as another form of saying "Hi, liked what we saw", or "Miss you guys", or "What's up?", and of course, there is no request for friendship or access to private pictures when it's clicked.
It could be used as an intermediary method for contacting other couples, for those that are perhaps too shy to send an e-mail expressing interest.
We know that when we get "winks" on other sites...even without an accompanying e-mail, we know they're just expressing interest. However when we get the requests to see private pictures on these sites with the "wink" feature, with no accompanying e-mail, we can only assume them to be picture collectors.
We are kind of confused as well.... we are new to this, and are not quite sure what the proper etiquette is for meeting people, we send friend requests as a way of saying hello, and if you accept it, we think your interested, if you don't, we think your not...
any thoughts?????anyone????
I guess maybe it's time to start sending emails......
any thoughts?????anyone????
I guess maybe it's time to start sending emails......
Thats our thought's as well Lauriepop and Thought. Its not that we are pic colletors. We want to see if there is an attraction if not then we move on. Most pics on home page is of the woman. Wife wants to see what the hubby looks like as well. This is a two way street here for both partners. If all we can see is your feet how can we decided if we really want to meet. Just our 2 cents. If we have asked to be on your freinds list and have offended anyone we are sorry.
Ok, so here's another question, We have a very small friends list and keep some very revealing pictures in our private pictures.
What is the purpose of the friends list? vs. favorites. We have always viewed it as folks that we know and hang out with. We have had some very dear friends that we haven't seen in 6-8 months so we removed them from the friends list.
We have a very hot couple that we had over for play time and then in two months of not seeing them we removed them. also they did not have any private pictures and wondered what was the advantage of keeping them on the list. We don't want to hurt feelings, and we think that at some time in the future we will likely see them at a club or some such event. we hope this isn't the if you don't bring a toy you cant play mentality.
So we have like 60+ private pictures, who should we share them with? We are starting to think were getting weird. Any suggestions....
What is the purpose of the friends list? vs. favorites. We have always viewed it as folks that we know and hang out with. We have had some very dear friends that we haven't seen in 6-8 months so we removed them from the friends list.
We have a very hot couple that we had over for play time and then in two months of not seeing them we removed them. also they did not have any private pictures and wondered what was the advantage of keeping them on the list. We don't want to hurt feelings, and we think that at some time in the future we will likely see them at a club or some such event. we hope this isn't the if you don't bring a toy you cant play mentality.
So we have like 60+ private pictures, who should we share them with? We are starting to think were getting weird. Any suggestions....
This is a social site and we send a request cause we are interested and we only have full face pics in are private album. to us it seems that if you dont have some kinda friends request then whats the point. remember its a social site and if you dont like the friend request then delete them when your done. pretty simple
Could it be that people like to connect a body with a face. Could be human nature as it somehow semms more personal. Also maybe you would get fewer friend requests if a face pic was on the profile. Just a thought.
PARTIALLYSHAVED i Agree with you completely! I once in awhile request friendship with someone. Usually they live too far away but their profile at least interests me in getting to know them and be firnds at least....I joined here mainly for friends many years ago and have made a few. Anything more then that would have to basically be somone close to where I live, If the friednship isn't accepted I don't pursue it. Why can't other epeople be like that> I guess there has to be assholes in every crowd?That is my feelings at least!The few that do k ow me her know that and I guess the others never will.
Speaking as the "receiver" of friend requests, it all boils down to INTENT.
Everyone knows there are many quacks, fruits and nuts out there. Trying to determine authenticity is the one real pain-in-the-ass about this process.
If someone has spent the time perusing enough profiles to find us 'X' miles away, they certainly have enough time to include at least a one-liner indicating what is on their mind. It's basic human courtesy. Anything else, in my humble opinion, is junk mail (when junk mail shows up in your snail mailbox, what happens?).
I've pondered the 'too shy' theory and don't buy it. If they are that painfully shy, they'd probably be better off finding another pastime more suited to them - checkers, for example..
Everyone knows there are many quacks, fruits and nuts out there. Trying to determine authenticity is the one real pain-in-the-ass about this process.
If someone has spent the time perusing enough profiles to find us 'X' miles away, they certainly have enough time to include at least a one-liner indicating what is on their mind. It's basic human courtesy. Anything else, in my humble opinion, is junk mail (when junk mail shows up in your snail mailbox, what happens?).
I've pondered the 'too shy' theory and don't buy it. If they are that painfully shy, they'd probably be better off finding another pastime more suited to them - checkers, for example..
I have watched this thread for a while now and have a ton of opinion on it...but since it's 5 a.m...I can't think so....my only rational thought on 2 1/2 hours sleep is...which is going to be more annoying...the friend requests without an accompanying email...or the short and sweet "I wanna fuck your wife" email they manage to type and send...can't win either way right...lol
I can't believe no one has said anything yet about the window that pops up now....I tried to send a friend request yesterday after talking to someone in chat and a little window popped up that told me something like "most members prefer an accompanying email with requests. Press ok to continue"....has any one else gotten this message yet?.....kisses
Oh, and I didn't realize if I leave a request unanswered they can't send another...hmmmm, let's see if my OCD will allow me to do that (or will that number on the home screen drive me crazy?).....lol....kisses again
I can't believe no one has said anything yet about the window that pops up now....I tried to send a friend request yesterday after talking to someone in chat and a little window popped up that told me something like "most members prefer an accompanying email with requests. Press ok to continue"....has any one else gotten this message yet?.....kisses
Oh, and I didn't realize if I leave a request unanswered they can't send another...hmmmm, let's see if my OCD will allow me to do that (or will that number on the home screen drive me crazy?).....lol....kisses again