Swingers Forum - Honesty, Loyalty, Trust & Respect

We feel that honesty is something that is delivered the first time we message someone. That way there are no surprises when we finally get together. No baring of the soul until there have been meetings face-to-face, just like any other real relationship, which we consider these friendships to be. After all, we are here for friendships first, sex is the bonus. We have several couples we met in this lifestyle who are not our sex partners but turned out to be wonderful friends.

We tell each and every person we contact or that contacts us we are open and honest about everything with those we would like to consider our friends...

that having been said, because we ask them to be honest and feel free to ask us anything, Dishonesty is an immediate turn off.

Swinging is an activity that requires honesty. It requires everyone to be upfront and candid about what they want and where they are in the "swing" of things. Nothing kills a mood faster than to find out that in this case bisexual female means -- he wishes she was but she isn't.

I am not talking about baring your soul. I tend to save that for a very few people. But we have swinging friends who have become very close to us and we do get into private and personal matters not related to swinging. Swinging friends, if done carefully can make fantastic friendships.

Loyalty is in our mind -- maintaining the trust that is established. It means keeping the relationship discreet as required and staying in touch. Which leads back to a long term friendship?

Swinging requires respect for the situation from the very beginning. We must each respect the limits and personal desires of everyone involved. Over time that will grow to respect the person as an individual that you know well. That is not possible on the first date in swinging any more than it was on the first date when you met your spouse.

With trust we approach it in two different ways. I tend to trust until you prove to me that I cannot. Belinda tends to doubt until proven wrong. It makes us a pretty good team. Because depending upon the people and the situation one of us is always wrong and one is always right.

Honesty is far and away the easiest to give. Successful swinging requires us to give that to the situation. Furthermore, none of the others is truly possible unless we do go into the fray committed to being honest with everyone.

We pretty much demand honesty in the first few lines of our profile. We know it is not going to make honest people out the fakers and liars who try to fool you with old or misleading pictures and fictional H/W proportions, and then try to somehow charm you into sleeping with them by the time you actually meet. But since we added that line, it seems for us that most of them have moved on to an easier mark.:h

Honesty is easy for us although it sometimes can be over whelming to some. Trust developes over time and if it is a couple you see often you will probably enjoy the sex better and trust them more. We respect everyone and expect the same from them, unfortunately we are sometimes disappointed but not that often. We give everyone the benefit of the doubt until we see that we should not and we politely walk away. Mostly we do not take any of our meetings or play situations that seriously so we alleviate the stress and that really makes for a great situation and minimizes a chance for drama.

Didn't say we made it past dinner personality didn't match so she lost out so putting it all out there can be bad for the lady sometimes. We are a couple so she normally sits there while I do the talking. An it's my personality of honesty that can be to conflict of intrest and the lady loses out.