I am a recently single male who has been in the lifestyle for two years. I want to continue the lifestyle but it is very hard as a single. I'm am thinking about giving it up, does any one have any suggestions on starting over as a single. I welcome all reply,s.
go find a gf who is into the lifestyle
Try adding some pics, so others who are interested in single males can view them to see if you are what they maybe interested in.
Most couples do prefer to see pics of you not of only your c*ck shots. Some all start to look alike. Make yours stand out and say you are serious about meeting couples.
A lot of patience also helps, since most couples lead hectic lives they need to work around many schedules in order to meet others to begin with.
Most couples do prefer to see pics of you not of only your c*ck shots. Some all start to look alike. Make yours stand out and say you are serious about meeting couples.
A lot of patience also helps, since most couples lead hectic lives they need to work around many schedules in order to meet others to begin with.
I agree with creative, patient has alot to do with meeting people. I wish there was more that had some.
i have added some privite pics it is a start for now if someone contacts me and i feel good about that person or cpl i will show
We agree post a pic of something besides your cock pics will help there are cpls who willmeet with single guys but ones without a pic don't stand a chance. Good luck
Norm&Sharon
Norm&Sharon
Im allways looking for them single males..............give us a buzz
I feel your pain..... my other half is only into it on occasion so I have to fly solo most of the time too. It is EXTREMELY difficult for a single male, but I have managed to make a few, just a few, very good friends. It took quite some time, but the quality of the friendships make up for it. My advice to you is to just stick to it.... will be worth the wait. Best of luck! -ODB
Swinging and the Single Male. Sounds like a good title for someone\'s theisis.
We like to meet with single guys a lot. We tend to choose men who are clean cut, have the TIME to actually get together on occassion, respect our limits and our relationship by not trying anything underhanded, know how to use a spell check, and do not have the words \"cock\", \"big\", \"pussy master\", or any other arrangement of those items in their screen name. (You would be surprised.)
Be polite, be polite, be polite! I can\'t say it enough! And when you make a date, be there on time. Your personality will win the couples over once you get your foot in the door, but remember...there are like 2 gazillion single horn dogs out there who are making it hard for you by being complete assholes, and initially you are simply one of them...so when you meet a great couple, dont do anything to remind them of the other 1.99 gazillion. LoL.
Luvbugs!
We like to meet with single guys a lot. We tend to choose men who are clean cut, have the TIME to actually get together on occassion, respect our limits and our relationship by not trying anything underhanded, know how to use a spell check, and do not have the words \"cock\", \"big\", \"pussy master\", or any other arrangement of those items in their screen name. (You would be surprised.)
Be polite, be polite, be polite! I can\'t say it enough! And when you make a date, be there on time. Your personality will win the couples over once you get your foot in the door, but remember...there are like 2 gazillion single horn dogs out there who are making it hard for you by being complete assholes, and initially you are simply one of them...so when you meet a great couple, dont do anything to remind them of the other 1.99 gazillion. LoL.
Luvbugs!
We can offer a suggestion or two based on our experiences...
#1. Be sure to read someone\'s profile before you message them instead of just looking at the pics and then trying to type with a hard-on between you and the keyboard.
#2. If you are going to post a \"dick pic\" don\'t make it the first pic on your profile. The wife has told more than one single male that she knows what one looks like, has one at home, and understands that he has one or why else would he be on a site of this type looking for somewhere to stick it!
#3. Whether a couple or a single female just be polite and respectful. So many single males act as if they are doing a couple a \"FAVOR\" by messaging them and asking them if they would be interested. Let\'s face the facts.....if the couples and single females didn\'t have what you are looking for you wouldn\'t be here.
Nothing implied toward you personally since we don\'t know you, only suggestions from a couple\'s point of view!
#1. Be sure to read someone\'s profile before you message them instead of just looking at the pics and then trying to type with a hard-on between you and the keyboard.
#2. If you are going to post a \"dick pic\" don\'t make it the first pic on your profile. The wife has told more than one single male that she knows what one looks like, has one at home, and understands that he has one or why else would he be on a site of this type looking for somewhere to stick it!
#3. Whether a couple or a single female just be polite and respectful. So many single males act as if they are doing a couple a \"FAVOR\" by messaging them and asking them if they would be interested. Let\'s face the facts.....if the couples and single females didn\'t have what you are looking for you wouldn\'t be here.
Nothing implied toward you personally since we don\'t know you, only suggestions from a couple\'s point of view!
To be honest I don
A previous post said as a solution to the single male problem, \" go get a GF in the life style\". I would love to. Do you now any single ladies in the life style in central Forida? Would you mind introducing me to them? I am not here to steal any ones wife. I do enjoy the multiple bodies in the bed aspect of swinging. And if you think about it, if there are 4,5,6 or 7 bodies in the bed does it really matter if all of them are married to some one in the bed. I sure know it does not matter if one of them is a single woman. Here in my humble opinion are the real single male problems. There are just too damn many of us, Some of us are too aggressive, Too many of us are liars and cheats. But not all of us.
**I think too many single guys are too worried about getting their d**k wet and are not taking the time to get to know people.**
And there it is...
Most of the single men we have met suffer from what seems to be a few very common misconceptions. In our experience, we have seen that:
-they believe they are rendering some service to the husband because he is inadequate in some way or another...
-they believe that the wife is interested in replacing her husband and he just may be the lucky stud to do it...
-the experience itself is some kind of sexual conquest to be boasted about to their college buddies...
-they are married men who lack the basic communication skills to honestly explain their desires to their wives because they are afraid that even if they do she will STILL not be receptive to the idea...
-they are married men who are fine with being with other men\'s wives, but would never allow their wife to be with another man (if that is her desire)
-they mistakenly feel that they have the biggest cock in the WORLD, and all women should benefit from it
-they mistakenly feel that they will be humping everything, everywhere, and with everyone online simply because they have a profile available..
and the list goes on....
We have only met a few here and there that have had good intentions, took things as they came, and added a truly amazing element to what we already consider to be a very erotic sexual encounter. They didnt have the biggest cocks, the nicest cars, or the largest ego. They were just great guys who acted like gentleman each time we had the pleasure of spending time with them. You guys know who you are, and we thank you for being different.
Luvbugs!
And there it is...
Most of the single men we have met suffer from what seems to be a few very common misconceptions. In our experience, we have seen that:
-they believe they are rendering some service to the husband because he is inadequate in some way or another...
-they believe that the wife is interested in replacing her husband and he just may be the lucky stud to do it...
-the experience itself is some kind of sexual conquest to be boasted about to their college buddies...
-they are married men who lack the basic communication skills to honestly explain their desires to their wives because they are afraid that even if they do she will STILL not be receptive to the idea...
-they are married men who are fine with being with other men\'s wives, but would never allow their wife to be with another man (if that is her desire)
-they mistakenly feel that they have the biggest cock in the WORLD, and all women should benefit from it
-they mistakenly feel that they will be humping everything, everywhere, and with everyone online simply because they have a profile available..
and the list goes on....
We have only met a few here and there that have had good intentions, took things as they came, and added a truly amazing element to what we already consider to be a very erotic sexual encounter. They didnt have the biggest cocks, the nicest cars, or the largest ego. They were just great guys who acted like gentleman each time we had the pleasure of spending time with them. You guys know who you are, and we thank you for being different.
Luvbugs!
You know what being one 3 differant sites yes i have noticed alot of pic seekers. We have meet alot of single guys, but wasnt what they said they was. Pictures of the face, does do alot of justice, when i get ahold of a guy i allways ask for a face pic.
Tell them luvbug.....
DAMN..... you guys are scaring us. We have been swappers for 10 years and just started really clubbing it this year.
We are considering a single male for something different but now we are wondering... is it worth the effort? It is always been fun to borrow a hubby (or wife for that matter) for some threesome fun at the club so this SEEMED like the next logical step....
We are considering a single male for something different but now we are wondering... is it worth the effort? It is always been fun to borrow a hubby (or wife for that matter) for some threesome fun at the club so this SEEMED like the next logical step....
What Luvbugs said! Thats exactly how we feel.
TBC6970,
We have heard all that too. Some of them get even worse when they get rejected.
We have heard all that too. Some of them get even worse when they get rejected.
**it goes on and on..as we all no there is nothing more arrogant or impatient than a single guy that has been reduced to porn and hand lotion for thelast 6 months. **
Not only did I fall on the floor laughing, I have decided not to shake the hands of the single men we meet until I have a better understanding of how they spend their time! LMAO.
Not only did I fall on the floor laughing, I have decided not to shake the hands of the single men we meet until I have a better understanding of how they spend their time! LMAO.
As suggested add a pic,
then be honest and listen to what the couple is looking for. if there is not a match after the meeting move on, dont hang around, each couple or single female is looking for something different we prefer our single males to be gentlemen in public, aggressive in bed if invited but also know their place in the relationship, after the fun go home...lol
Chele
then be honest and listen to what the couple is looking for. if there is not a match after the meeting move on, dont hang around, each couple or single female is looking for something different we prefer our single males to be gentlemen in public, aggressive in bed if invited but also know their place in the relationship, after the fun go home...lol
Chele
We have been \"in the lifestyle\" for oh....about a month. Initially we were completely open to including single males. Unfortunately, it is not \"just a few bad apples\" that ruin it for the rest, but 99.98% of the SM\'s that we have spoken to are creeps. I just figure if we want an SM we can go to the local pub and pick one up
S&J
PS You left out one standard SM line...the final desperate plea of \"Can\'t I just watch you???\"
S&J
PS You left out one standard SM line...the final desperate plea of \"Can\'t I just watch you???\"
// My favorite one is when single guys say \"well what if I can find a girl for your husband?\" Then why aren\'t you having sex with her? LOL...
We had a guy recently try this one as well. He kept on emailing us daily and tried to IM us every time we signed on the site. Had to block him everywhere. Not sure we have finally gotten rid of him.
We had a guy recently try this one as well. He kept on emailing us daily and tried to IM us every time we signed on the site. Had to block him everywhere. Not sure we have finally gotten rid of him.
We have found its better to deal with the single married males. The single male with out a female only contact us for repeats when they can\'t find it any where else, and for the married single male they tend to stick arround alot longer then the single male without a wife/gf on the side. But single married male does have their share problems. Like finding the time to fly under the radar so there wife dont find out but they are more willing to find the time took hook up for the sex. To where most single males without females make appointments for meet and greets and then get cold feet and leave us sitting there wondering if they are going to show. Not all meet and greets end up with sex, and not all single men are assholes. So single or married and single you just have to be patient in the lifestyle that deals better with couples than singles.
P & D
P & D
From what I\'ve seen here in this thread, and on a few other sites I\'m on, there definately are a lot of single guys out there that are lying, cheating, or generally causing problems (such as harrassing couples who reject them), but there are also others that are actually good guys.
I am on a few different sites and have met some wonderful couples that I consider to be great friends, there has of course been a lot of rejection, but single guys simply have to realize that is how things are in the lifestyle. Most of the couples/women that are on these sites are looking for couples or single women. Harassing them, bombarding them with e-mails, IM\'ing them off the site, insulting them to reject you are not ways to win someone over, and for those that think word of their being complete jackasses doesn\'t get around, they are really in for a supprise.
And just as a note for those couples that are looking for single guys, don\'t give up from taking with the assholes, if you search enough you can find some great guys who are gentlemen, have an interest in more than a one night stand, and who really ARE looking for friendship outside the bedroom, and do NOT think that they are just god\'s gift to humanity and are somehow deserving of your attention.
-Peter
I am on a few different sites and have met some wonderful couples that I consider to be great friends, there has of course been a lot of rejection, but single guys simply have to realize that is how things are in the lifestyle. Most of the couples/women that are on these sites are looking for couples or single women. Harassing them, bombarding them with e-mails, IM\'ing them off the site, insulting them to reject you are not ways to win someone over, and for those that think word of their being complete jackasses doesn\'t get around, they are really in for a supprise.
And just as a note for those couples that are looking for single guys, don\'t give up from taking with the assholes, if you search enough you can find some great guys who are gentlemen, have an interest in more than a one night stand, and who really ARE looking for friendship outside the bedroom, and do NOT think that they are just god\'s gift to humanity and are somehow deserving of your attention.
-Peter
We have met a few single men who were complete gentleman in the past, but after reading your post we wished you lived closer Pete. LoL.
TBC6970 OMG SO FUNNY and sadly I\'ve heard all of those LOL
But I love single males, and tend to look carefully for them........ I\'ve actually had more trouble with married men and women than I have with single males.....
But I love single males, and tend to look carefully for them........ I\'ve actually had more trouble with married men and women than I have with single males.....
Ralph did bring something up there that I would like to ask about.
When I send a message to someone and get a response back that they aren\'t interested (I am referring to the polite responses here, not the ones with creative suggestions of the physically impossible things I should go do to/with myself), I like to respond back and thank them for taking the time to respond even though they weren\'t interested, and wishing them luck in finding what they are looking for.
I like to do this because there seems to be very few people who will actually take the time to respond when they are not interested, rather than just deleting the message, and I do appreciate that they took the time to do so when they really have no need to do anything more than just hit the delete button and be done with it. As for the wishing them luck part of the message, just because feel I\'m not compatible with them is no reason to be upset, that\'s life, everyone has something they are looking for, and you can\'t be all things for all people, so hopefully they will find those that meet what they are looking for.
Now, the actual question is this: How do some of you feel about a response such as that, after you have told someone you aren\'t intersted? I\'ve thought about it in the past wondering if perhaps more people view it as being sarcastic and bitter about being rejected than being sincere, but I have never actually asked anyone about it...
-Peter
When I send a message to someone and get a response back that they aren\'t interested (I am referring to the polite responses here, not the ones with creative suggestions of the physically impossible things I should go do to/with myself), I like to respond back and thank them for taking the time to respond even though they weren\'t interested, and wishing them luck in finding what they are looking for.
I like to do this because there seems to be very few people who will actually take the time to respond when they are not interested, rather than just deleting the message, and I do appreciate that they took the time to do so when they really have no need to do anything more than just hit the delete button and be done with it. As for the wishing them luck part of the message, just because feel I\'m not compatible with them is no reason to be upset, that\'s life, everyone has something they are looking for, and you can\'t be all things for all people, so hopefully they will find those that meet what they are looking for.
Now, the actual question is this: How do some of you feel about a response such as that, after you have told someone you aren\'t intersted? I\'ve thought about it in the past wondering if perhaps more people view it as being sarcastic and bitter about being rejected than being sincere, but I have never actually asked anyone about it...
-Peter
I think its a polite and respectful thing to do......I get that response alot from men I\'ve told I was not interested, and I appreciate it very much.
The \"single male\" subject hits home hard for me. I\'m listed as a single because, having once listed as married, things got very complicated. My wife suffered a brain aneurysm on Jan. 1, 2004 which left her in a persistant vegetative state. Before the tragedy, we led a lusty liberal lifestyle. I visit her in almost every minute that I\'m not working or sleeping. But, after almost two years as a priest, I am re-entering the life to try to retain some sense of physical self-awareness. I don\'t even know if I\'m who I used to be, but I\'ve finally resolved that, if situations were reversed, I would wish that she keep sensuality as part of her life. I\'m upfront with contacts at all times and this adds to the \"not interested\" responses. If you single guys feel it is difficult, try being married and single at the same time.
The \"single male\" subject hits home hard for me. I\'m listed as a single because, having once listed as married, things got very complicated. My wife suffered a brain aneurysm on Jan. 1, 2004 which left her in a persistant vegetative state. Before the tragedy, we led a lusty liberal lifestyle. I visit her in almost every minute that I\'m not working or sleeping. But, after almost two years as a priest, I am re-entering the life to try to retain some sense of physical self-awareness. I don\'t even know if I\'m who I used to be, but I\'ve finally resolved that, if situations were reversed, I would wish that she keep sensuality as part of her life. I\'m upfront with contacts at all times and this adds to the \"not interested\" responses. If you single guys feel it is difficult, try being married and single at the same time.
Here is an Idea, Maybe. Because there seems to be a world of bad experiences with the \"wrong\" single males, why not when you have a good experience, find a way of identifying those single guys? Not meaning that you partied and can vounch for his skills but more along the line of he is who and what he says and not a total jerk. Then all of us single guys would be trying like hell to get an \"interview\".
Ok my 2 cents worth. I always am polite when I contact couples. I even reply with a \"thanks\" when they say \"no Thanks\". Why be rude or crude.??? I am in no way trying to replace anyone\'s spouse or significant other. I just want to meet new people,enjoy myself and hopefully help all enjoy themselves,especially the lady. I am str8,and love to see the lady receive as much or more pleasure as she gives. I believe sex is a gift and should be treated as such and appreciated. I truly believe this and always let the lady know thru actions or words just how much her gift was appreciated. But as for \"find a g/f\".... Much easier said than done. They are just the opposite of us single males. We are pretty much shunned,where they are pursued. Maybe I am too old for some but everything still works and pretty good too. And yes I know guys can be jerks. Some of us tend to think with the \"little head\" and it\'s not surprising what can be done or said when your other head isn\'t getting the right amount of blood. I have met a few ncie couples and most of my responses have been polite. Some tho,have \"single males\" in their ad heading and then get pissed and/or snotty when you answer their ads. Whoa,we are now to be mind readers??? Well,thats all for my point of view. Hope this helped out \"single male\" image and not damaged it any further. Jim