In answer to another forum, I think I can say why all the haters. It seems to me that men in general are hated on these sites anyway so I am not at much of a loss by stating these things. Whatever the case may be, pretty much we are shoved to the side and told that we are only interesting to someone else because they like our wives, girlfriends, ect.
My wife loves the whole play and play with lifestyle of swinging, but she does not like getting on these sites much because of all the posers. Women are fewer in #s on these sites, but their ratio of posing is higher. At least single men are honest about just wanting to get laid, but go out stroking their own egos by thinking a man is willing to share his wife for some extra excitment, or to provide pleasure. If I needed girls or guys to do that, I wouldn't think much of myself as a husband to the very beautiful woman that I am married to.
The truth behind swinging is, after a certain point in a life, you find that you are tired of the rules that have been handed down to you by the prudes, and religious factions that occupy the U.S. and discover for yourselves what and why the rules were set in the way that they were. It is a form of rebellion, but it only works if you are secure in yourself. Trying to gain more security in your relationship, as well as, security in yourself by getting into the lifestyle will ultimately lead to the end of the relationship.
Between getting e-mails from people 100 miles away or more, getting on the chat room only to be ignored unless we are showing T N A, Single girls running around pretending they are some sort of rare find, and men thinking they are a gift to a marriage, it becomes very difficult to remain optimistic about the people you hear from on these types of sites. Therefor, when you contact someone on here about meeting, be honest about the actual meeting to yourself before you send out the invitation. It is frustrating to the people you send it to when you don't show up.
We like to make friends, but it has been very difficult in this state because people do not seem to grasp the idea that we are offering friendship and social companionship that the general public just cannot provide. Sex is the benefit. If it feels right, we do it, but it is determined by the moment, and if you are driving 300 miles, I don't think you drove all that way for sitting down to a movie, or a couple of drinks.
We are successful without you, I feel we are both attractive without your approval, and have made it this far without knowing you. We have our necks on the line by posting photos(Not that I think face pics are a requirement), but that is the risk you take. If you are unwilling to even show yourself in public, get off the site, and quit emailing people you have no intention of meeting in person. This is not your cheap porn site, and if I had it my way, people that continuously email, and never actually try to meet anyone in person, they would be pointed out by name, and booted.
I realize we need to prove they are posers to a point, but after different people that have proven they are here to socialize complain about the same people that just don't show up, or are only talk, what is the point in letting them stay, and further irritate the group?
Why all the haters? I think hate is a strong word, but we still don't like having to deal with the photo perves, cheap porn hunting, egotistical, snobs that seem to run on these sites unchecked. Do we make you randy baby? Does the idea of a nice quite evening of watching a movie with a couple of married friends turning into a night of debauchery make you wet your pants? Does the thought of a couple seducing you and your spouse make you moan quietly inside? If you are within 60 miles of us, or Augusta GA(We travel there alot), and attracted to us, give us a ring. If we find the same attraction to you there may be some reality to your thoughts. If reality of your thoughts scare you, you might want to get away from the site altogether, and re-evaluate why you are here; because to us, life is not a dress rehearsal.
My wife loves the whole play and play with lifestyle of swinging, but she does not like getting on these sites much because of all the posers. Women are fewer in #s on these sites, but their ratio of posing is higher. At least single men are honest about just wanting to get laid, but go out stroking their own egos by thinking a man is willing to share his wife for some extra excitment, or to provide pleasure. If I needed girls or guys to do that, I wouldn't think much of myself as a husband to the very beautiful woman that I am married to.
The truth behind swinging is, after a certain point in a life, you find that you are tired of the rules that have been handed down to you by the prudes, and religious factions that occupy the U.S. and discover for yourselves what and why the rules were set in the way that they were. It is a form of rebellion, but it only works if you are secure in yourself. Trying to gain more security in your relationship, as well as, security in yourself by getting into the lifestyle will ultimately lead to the end of the relationship.
Between getting e-mails from people 100 miles away or more, getting on the chat room only to be ignored unless we are showing T N A, Single girls running around pretending they are some sort of rare find, and men thinking they are a gift to a marriage, it becomes very difficult to remain optimistic about the people you hear from on these types of sites. Therefor, when you contact someone on here about meeting, be honest about the actual meeting to yourself before you send out the invitation. It is frustrating to the people you send it to when you don't show up.
We like to make friends, but it has been very difficult in this state because people do not seem to grasp the idea that we are offering friendship and social companionship that the general public just cannot provide. Sex is the benefit. If it feels right, we do it, but it is determined by the moment, and if you are driving 300 miles, I don't think you drove all that way for sitting down to a movie, or a couple of drinks.
We are successful without you, I feel we are both attractive without your approval, and have made it this far without knowing you. We have our necks on the line by posting photos(Not that I think face pics are a requirement), but that is the risk you take. If you are unwilling to even show yourself in public, get off the site, and quit emailing people you have no intention of meeting in person. This is not your cheap porn site, and if I had it my way, people that continuously email, and never actually try to meet anyone in person, they would be pointed out by name, and booted.
I realize we need to prove they are posers to a point, but after different people that have proven they are here to socialize complain about the same people that just don't show up, or are only talk, what is the point in letting them stay, and further irritate the group?
Why all the haters? I think hate is a strong word, but we still don't like having to deal with the photo perves, cheap porn hunting, egotistical, snobs that seem to run on these sites unchecked. Do we make you randy baby? Does the idea of a nice quite evening of watching a movie with a couple of married friends turning into a night of debauchery make you wet your pants? Does the thought of a couple seducing you and your spouse make you moan quietly inside? If you are within 60 miles of us, or Augusta GA(We travel there alot), and attracted to us, give us a ring. If we find the same attraction to you there may be some reality to your thoughts. If reality of your thoughts scare you, you might want to get away from the site altogether, and re-evaluate why you are here; because to us, life is not a dress rehearsal.
PS, this photo was not taken at our house.
Pretty jaded view INSTANT....probably valid but jaded nonetheless. We wouldn't still be in this if we hadn't met some amazing friends in this. But yes we've met people like you describe as well. People who are out for themselves and could care less about anything but getting laid. It's a little like life I guess....lots of assholes but some amazing people who make it worthwhile in the end. Keep your chin up and your standards and you'll prevail. :-)
THE (accept no substitutes) Evildoers
THE (accept no substitutes) Evildoers
We agree with EVILDOERS. We've had our share of tough experiences, but the friends we've made have been amazing. If we've written a review for anyone, trust me, it is bcs. they are not just great in the sack (they are that too, don't get me wrong 
, but it is bcs. they are amazing people that are truly caring and fantastic in more ways than just swinging.
, but it is bcs. they are amazing people that are truly caring and fantastic in more ways than just swinging.Evildoers, While I agree that it seems a little jaded, my mind is set on the fact that there are actually very few people in this state that are open to the idea to swinging. You hear alot of conversation about what people would like to find; threesomes, and moresomes, but few that actually connect the dots to swinging. The ones that do think that sexual encounter is all there is to it.
As a result, when there are so few, it is hard to find couples that not only fit into the box that each of us are looking for, but that we can be friends with socially. Since we have come to SC, we have not met 1 couple that we can be friends with outside of swinging that does not live 150 miles away. What is worse, when we lived in Oklahoma, we were bombarded by people here that send the constant e-mails about how they would love to meet us in person. When fate intervened and we actually ended up living here, suddenly those same people e-mail back and forth until they actually have to confront us, and nothing. Now on our old site, we get sent mails from there about how they wish we were closer, and wished they could meet us.
I guess what I am saying to everyone is, being online chat buddies is fine. Who knows, one day you may actually meet, but it's not a good idea to moan constantly about meeting someone 800 miles away, and never take the time to get to know the people right there next to you.
As a result, when there are so few, it is hard to find couples that not only fit into the box that each of us are looking for, but that we can be friends with socially. Since we have come to SC, we have not met 1 couple that we can be friends with outside of swinging that does not live 150 miles away. What is worse, when we lived in Oklahoma, we were bombarded by people here that send the constant e-mails about how they would love to meet us in person. When fate intervened and we actually ended up living here, suddenly those same people e-mail back and forth until they actually have to confront us, and nothing. Now on our old site, we get sent mails from there about how they wish we were closer, and wished they could meet us.
I guess what I am saying to everyone is, being online chat buddies is fine. Who knows, one day you may actually meet, but it's not a good idea to moan constantly about meeting someone 800 miles away, and never take the time to get to know the people right there next to you.
You'll find posers everywhere....every facet of life. Perhaps it's just your area. Swinging IS a numbers game and if there aren't alot of people in your area your chances go down. But we've found MANY people locally who want to play. Of course Utah IS the hotbed of swinging!!!
;-)
Evil
;-)
Evil
Yes, we have spent a little time with Evildoers and enjoyed our moment and hope for more. But beside that UT is the MECCA of swining. SC try the fun in Charlotte. Had alot of fun there too.
Awwww 22PLAY....BIG HUG!!! :-) People don't realize that in Utah you can have a pretty big swingers party with just two couples....since we all have seven wives! ;-)
Evild
Evild
errrrg, someone just asked us last night what we were doing, we told them anything, and left our #. Then they left a message about they missed us, what are we doing tonight, and we have replied back the same, and nothing. That makes about 10 between this month and last month alone. Oh well, Me and Jen just went out last night and pretended not to be married. She had rednecks falling all over themselves to get to her, then she chose me. ahhhhhhh. Two of them were pretty cool, so with their rainjackets in hand, she took them to the boat launch and gave them a runner up gift. lol
PS: If anyone that has been calling us, only to ignore us after they realize they might have to meet; actually does meet us tonight, I will erase all my comments from this tread.
PS: If anyone that has been calling us, only to ignore us after they realize they might have to meet; actually does meet us tonight, I will erase all my comments from this tread.
Unfortunately this site is not a site for men.
It is a site for couples to pick up women and if necessary, get stuck with the extra man.
That is a reality view of the site. It is not bad or sad. It is just what is.
I am fortunate enough to be the other half of Tenderone.
She is approached quite a bit but when they find out she has a bf, the response is HELL NO!
She has many wonderful frends here. But they are friends... not interludes.
I seldom stop in because there is no reason to do so.
This site seems to be where women get there fantasies fillled... guys not included.
That is not a complaint. That is just the way it is.
It is a site for couples to pick up women and if necessary, get stuck with the extra man.
That is a reality view of the site. It is not bad or sad. It is just what is.
I am fortunate enough to be the other half of Tenderone.
She is approached quite a bit but when they find out she has a bf, the response is HELL NO!
She has many wonderful frends here. But they are friends... not interludes.
I seldom stop in because there is no reason to do so.
This site seems to be where women get there fantasies fillled... guys not included.
That is not a complaint. That is just the way it is.
Brent,
I have to disagree with you to a cetain degree. I have seen many couples gravitate to other couples. Also as a single male, I have even been blessed enough to find the occasional couple or single lady looking for it. The best thing to do is to keep a positive attitude and keep trying. Eventually something should come your way.
Instant,
I am sorry you guys are having such a hard time finding playmates. All I can say is that it is their loss. As others have told you before, this is largely a numbers game. If you are in an area without a large proportion of swingers then it will be harder for you. I did like the way you found your fun though. I would have loved to be in that bar on that night.
I have to disagree with you to a cetain degree. I have seen many couples gravitate to other couples. Also as a single male, I have even been blessed enough to find the occasional couple or single lady looking for it. The best thing to do is to keep a positive attitude and keep trying. Eventually something should come your way.
Instant,
I am sorry you guys are having such a hard time finding playmates. All I can say is that it is their loss. As others have told you before, this is largely a numbers game. If you are in an area without a large proportion of swingers then it will be harder for you. I did like the way you found your fun though. I would have loved to be in that bar on that night.
First off INSTANT.... it is nice to see someone from SC actually on this site! Secondly, I can see where you are coming from. I have been in the lifestyle on and off for the past 12 years, both as a single and as a couple. During that time I have met some absolutely wonderful people and had some incredible experience that I will remember for life! Then again I have had met some people who were just all out assholes! Then there are the posers as well. This lifestyle is made up of all kinds of people, but you can't let the bad ones get you down.
Even as a single male I have had a lot of people play the games. I have talked to people online, planned to meet, and even given them my phone # so we could hammer out the details, and low and behold I never hear from them again! I think this is due to one of two things... either somebody is living a fantasy about doing this, or if it is a couple, then it is really only one party involved. People who want to do it will, those who don't wont. You can't let the bad apples get you down. There are lots of people out there who actively participate in the lifestyle, and I am sure you eventually meet some people who you will have wonderful lasting experiences with!
As a couple it is quite difficult for all 4 people to be in sync enough with their likes to be both friends as well as something more. When you do find them, be sure to hang on to them! My ex and I had a couple we stayed with for 5 years exclusively since we hit it off so well, both in the bedroom and out. We figured we would have a hard time finding that again, so we didn't want to ruin a good thing.
SC is kind of a rough state for swinging in general just because it is in the bible belt and people here tend to frown on this type of lifestyle. Again, don't let that discourage you because there are a lot of great couples... and singles out there as well!
If you are interested, I know of several area couples clubs that you might be interested in. If so, just send me an email and I will give you their names.
Even as a single male I have had a lot of people play the games. I have talked to people online, planned to meet, and even given them my phone # so we could hammer out the details, and low and behold I never hear from them again! I think this is due to one of two things... either somebody is living a fantasy about doing this, or if it is a couple, then it is really only one party involved. People who want to do it will, those who don't wont. You can't let the bad apples get you down. There are lots of people out there who actively participate in the lifestyle, and I am sure you eventually meet some people who you will have wonderful lasting experiences with!
As a couple it is quite difficult for all 4 people to be in sync enough with their likes to be both friends as well as something more. When you do find them, be sure to hang on to them! My ex and I had a couple we stayed with for 5 years exclusively since we hit it off so well, both in the bedroom and out. We figured we would have a hard time finding that again, so we didn't want to ruin a good thing.
SC is kind of a rough state for swinging in general just because it is in the bible belt and people here tend to frown on this type of lifestyle. Again, don't let that discourage you because there are a lot of great couples... and singles out there as well!
If you are interested, I know of several area couples clubs that you might be interested in. If so, just send me an email and I will give you their names.
After I posted about haters......I had to think alot to myself. Because in my mind, I had set an age limit, a time limits, alot of limits that I had to question why I put those in place? Does it matter how many times I talk to a person or a couple in its obvious nothing will happen? Not really? Does age matter if I find myself physically attrated? No, not really. Does it matter if someone is hundreds of miles away, and it'll never be a possibility to meet, let alone anything else? No.
Actually the biggest one I had to get over was age. The next biggest one is contacting couples/people that I think I might like, or might have something in common with. I don't do that. I play it safe and contact people/couples who are liek me......because I'm afraid of being hurt by the owrds of people who find a big gal like me disgusting.
So I guess in my own way I was a hater. Sorry about that folks.
Actually the biggest one I had to get over was age. The next biggest one is contacting couples/people that I think I might like, or might have something in common with. I don't do that. I play it safe and contact people/couples who are liek me......because I'm afraid of being hurt by the owrds of people who find a big gal like me disgusting.
So I guess in my own way I was a hater. Sorry about that folks.
Gotta throw in two cents more here. I kinda have to disagree on the whole "sucks cause we live in (insert city, state, area here) cause it's so conservative, etc." Yeah there are alot from Utah here because the Admin is here and started the site here and in Fla. but in case you were wondering, Utah is FAR from liberal in any way shape or form-lol. I seriously doubt SC is more conservative than Utah. And conservative places can be and often are hotbeds (no pun intended-lol) for "alternative" activities....you just have to look a little harder cause it's a little more underground. In fact I would venture to say that most ultraconservative areas are RIPE for swinging as the people there need to let their hair down a little after dealing with all the religious hypocrits, etc. Maybe you should look at other sites or venues for meeting people locally. Or start your own! lol Bottom line, don't give up. Look at other ways (get creative!) to hook up with people and maybe don't be too rigid in the particular type of person or situation you are looking for and you might be surprised how much naughty fun is out there. Just some thoughts...
Evil
Evil
Excellent thoughts evil. I have to agree to a point, but I am having a hard time finding that underground here. lol My intentions to the forum were not to make further complications to a already hard to understand culture, but rather to give some personal guidance to those that mean to contact us. We don't like being led on. We are on about 5 different sites now. We just like some some of the features of this one.
I must say though, to us, and according to the posts and profiles of many others, what is most frustrating is when you have couples out there that seem to think meeting would be great right up to the point that they actually have to do it, then they just don't commit to it. I frankly don't understand it, because we are not here for full on, full time sex, all the time. We are here to make friends that understand the lifestyle for what it is; Interesting, fun, relaxing, and natural.
Now, if anyone knows where we can find that underground scene in this area, it would be most appreciated. I have my doubts of it's existence, but am will to at least explore the possibilities. :z
I must say though, to us, and according to the posts and profiles of many others, what is most frustrating is when you have couples out there that seem to think meeting would be great right up to the point that they actually have to do it, then they just don't commit to it. I frankly don't understand it, because we are not here for full on, full time sex, all the time. We are here to make friends that understand the lifestyle for what it is; Interesting, fun, relaxing, and natural.
Now, if anyone knows where we can find that underground scene in this area, it would be most appreciated. I have my doubts of it's existence, but am will to at least explore the possibilities. :z
Well we've found that in general swinging is a numbers game...gotta kiss alot of frogs sometimes to get to the princes/princesses. LOL Have you tired Craigslist? Check out CL under the "casual encounters" section. Some people swear by it! Good luck!
Evil
Evil
LOL we looked at the craigs thing out of curiosity.... every single ad ended up being from a website
Wasn't talking specifically about haters, or even becoming one, rather than expressing the point that people that want to meet others should not be afraid to do just that. We don't like being emailed by people that want to chat constantly, talk about meeting, and then don't follow through.
I don't think people understand how many yahoo messages we get from people wanting to trade photos with us. We just tell them strait out, if you want photos for your home computer, you're going to have to meet us first so we can tell you are real. No more begging for photos for your free porn site.
This is a swinger site, not a cheap porn site. It is not for those that just get off on looking at other peoples photos. It is a medium for like minded people to get together, and to make real friends. By posting this, fewer people will call us on Yahoo begging for photos, and perhaps it will help weed out the fakers. Honestly I could care less whether people are fake or not. As long as they understand that we are not the one's they are looking for. I am concerned however that if we do weed out the fakers, there will be no-one left on this site in the state of South Carolina, because from what I can see, there are no real people on here from this state with the exception of a few single males, some of which really need to find themselves a steady relationship to be in.
That brings me to my final point, singles(Guys and Girls), neither of us are going to meet you on some dark alley or otherwise beech to make your fantasies come true. You have each other for that. She is not going to meet you guys, sorry, don't ask. I am not going to meet you ladies, sorry. I have a wife and do not have to sneak around for any reason. On a further note single ladies, it is not any better for you to ask my wife to do that than the guys. Like it or not, it is the same thing-DUHHHH.
I hope this is helpful for all those that wish to contact us. We are real, we expect you to be the same.
PS: (Being a real moron does not count)
I don't think people understand how many yahoo messages we get from people wanting to trade photos with us. We just tell them strait out, if you want photos for your home computer, you're going to have to meet us first so we can tell you are real. No more begging for photos for your free porn site.
This is a swinger site, not a cheap porn site. It is not for those that just get off on looking at other peoples photos. It is a medium for like minded people to get together, and to make real friends. By posting this, fewer people will call us on Yahoo begging for photos, and perhaps it will help weed out the fakers. Honestly I could care less whether people are fake or not. As long as they understand that we are not the one's they are looking for. I am concerned however that if we do weed out the fakers, there will be no-one left on this site in the state of South Carolina, because from what I can see, there are no real people on here from this state with the exception of a few single males, some of which really need to find themselves a steady relationship to be in.
That brings me to my final point, singles(Guys and Girls), neither of us are going to meet you on some dark alley or otherwise beech to make your fantasies come true. You have each other for that. She is not going to meet you guys, sorry, don't ask. I am not going to meet you ladies, sorry. I have a wife and do not have to sneak around for any reason. On a further note single ladies, it is not any better for you to ask my wife to do that than the guys. Like it or not, it is the same thing-DUHHHH.
I hope this is helpful for all those that wish to contact us. We are real, we expect you to be the same.
PS: (Being a real moron does not count)
INSTANTFUNCPL02, we do have to say that anyone who would attempt to set up a meeting with you two and doesn't follow through is seriously at loss. we would give our left tit & nut to spend time with you two.
1 Because you are both very attractive
2 From your post you seem very intellectual
3 you seem down to earth and not all full of yourselves.
1 Because you are both very attractive
2 From your post you seem very intellectual
3 you seem down to earth and not all full of yourselves.