We were talking tonight about how we prefer to find couples close to our ages but when meeting couples at either end of our age preference we like to take the time to get to know them better before playing. For us, the younger end of the spectrum we like to make sure they are mature and secure enough to handle the lifestyle. On the older end we want to make sure he will treat her respectfully and not just care about his own self. She had a bad experience when we were new to the lifestyle with a much older man trying to join in with her and someone else without asking and he was very forcefull. We know every person is not like this so please do not think we are saying they are.
So we were wondering if maybe the older ladies have concerns about playing with much younger men. Or the older mens concerns with younger ladies. If you are contacted by a couple at either end of your age preference do you treat it any diferently? Our goal for this thread is to learn what concerns couples at either end of our preferences have with a couple like us in the late 30`s and early 40`s.
So we were wondering if maybe the older ladies have concerns about playing with much younger men. Or the older mens concerns with younger ladies. If you are contacted by a couple at either end of your age preference do you treat it any diferently? Our goal for this thread is to learn what concerns couples at either end of our preferences have with a couple like us in the late 30`s and early 40`s.
It seems like both good and bad experiences can happen regardless of age. We find that we have more in common with couples near our same age but we are still open to people that are both older and younger. It depends on their maturity rather than their age.
We span the range, "C" is 27 and "R" is 47, however in actuality she acts more mature than he does. We have met some great folks that are older than us and we would have no problem getting naked with them, Because we hit it off socially. We have never gone in with the view of a quick romp in the hay. We are looking for friends and if something more happens after the friendship then we view that as a great bonus to the friendship.
If your looking for a quick lay, then i guess were of no use in the advice category.
doing the taxes, turbotax just locked up. fun night.
If your looking for a quick lay, then i guess were of no use in the advice category.
doing the taxes, turbotax just locked up. fun night.
Well C and R, if you can handle some of the age differences between us.. we would get naked with you guys anytime... just give us some time to get to know you... jumping into bed at our age is kinda difficult.. we may have to fall in.
You're too funny, it was you two that we were referring to. We value our friendship with the two of you and the other as we said before would be a sweet bonus. And might we add that your misses has a beautifully shaved, well, she did share the view with us saturday night at habits.
ROTFLMAO.. well.. if I recall there was and exchange of sorts of various lovely views of the anotomy. Love you guys too... just being friends with you young kids is a bonus. You name the time and place and you know we are there.
Age is merely a representation of the number of days a person has been on Earth. It does not reflect experiences, knowledge, or maturity. So whether someone is older or younger, is none-the-matter, but what they have done in life makes all the difference!
Here here NC! I concur! Although I must admit, sexual attraction is high on the list for me! It can't exist without mental stimulous in my world. I have met some people who were georgeous, until they opened their mouths!! And met some people who were cute and became exquisite once spoken to....
I think everyone has heard the saying; you can't judge a book by its cover.... I think that's what age is, a cover note....
Mrs.
I think everyone has heard the saying; you can't judge a book by its cover.... I think that's what age is, a cover note....
Mrs.
I'm not really able to do to much commenting on this site as of yet (due to lifestyle ignorance). But my 57 years probably qualifies me for this thread.
I agree with the "age is only a number" sentiment wholeheartedly. Unless one is looking only for a purely physiclal-contact relationship, what lies between the ears definitely comes into play big-time, every-time (thus the constant need for flake/fake /creep vigilance).
The mrs. is 10 years younger, and at first, I was concerned that my age would drag down the size of her playing field, so to speak. I suspect that has been the case to some degree (how would we know). But when it comes right down to it, I guess that just means the remaining playing field is where we were meant to be. Anyone to dismiss us out-of-hand, we feel to be the loser anyway
By the way, one example of age being relative would be (and I don't think C would mind me saying this) - she wouldn't last one day on SURVIVOR - I believe I could WIN it if they'd let me smoke and take my meds along
I agree with the "age is only a number" sentiment wholeheartedly. Unless one is looking only for a purely physiclal-contact relationship, what lies between the ears definitely comes into play big-time, every-time (thus the constant need for flake/fake /creep vigilance).
The mrs. is 10 years younger, and at first, I was concerned that my age would drag down the size of her playing field, so to speak. I suspect that has been the case to some degree (how would we know). But when it comes right down to it, I guess that just means the remaining playing field is where we were meant to be. Anyone to dismiss us out-of-hand, we feel to be the loser anyway
By the way, one example of age being relative would be (and I don't think C would mind me saying this) - she wouldn't last one day on SURVIVOR - I believe I could WIN it if they'd let me smoke and take my meds along
I have such a hardtime with the age issue. And, it against younger people rather then older. I am the first to admit it isn't fair and actually it is rather rude but I can't help it. The experiences I have had with a few(not all) leave me with the impression that they are drama filled insecure brats. Older people seem to know who they are and are more comfortable with the situations they are in. Feel free to trash me for my view.
you know sexy... We feel the same some times, we have learned that there a good portion of younger couples out there that never were just really involved in eachother! We have been with eachother for 8 years now and went through the whole not willing to leave the others sight thing! But the only you ever get to know people for who they are unless you try! we have found drama but we also found amazing people as well!
Mr.
Mr.
We have found the best way to handle the age issue is to just use our hands. So far it has worked very well.:z Its all been with attitude never age.
every notice when you turn the lights out... we are all the same and nothing really matters except where you put your hands?
cyn you hit the nail right on the head!!! LOL
We look to make some sort of a friendship with anyone we play with so we feel the best chance that would happen is if they were close to our ages but we have found many exceptions to that theory. We are just playing the odds that a connection is most commonly found with someone of similar ages.
The reason for this thread was because of conversation we were involved in at a party recently that we attended. People of all ages were there. I was sitting with a few older ladies, who I must say were very attractive, but then they started talking about all of their ailments and it almost makes me afraid that I might accidently hurt them if we played. I want to provide pleasure, not pain.
Also a few were saying they went to a big party and it was mostly younger couples who were dirty dancing and flirting but not really playing and they felt the younger swingers are not as sexual as the older people are. One rationalized it by saying that maybe the fear of pregnancy is the issue.
We try to be ourselves at all times and if we find common interests with a couple younger or older then us, great. Since we are somewhere in the middle we can go higher or lower then our ages. We would go higher then our ages first because of the experience and maturity factors hoping their experience will provide us some fun and share their knowledge with us. We wonder what those at either end of the spectrum think and what is their biggest concerns. Great input so far from everyone so thank you for that.
Joe and Lori
The reason for this thread was because of conversation we were involved in at a party recently that we attended. People of all ages were there. I was sitting with a few older ladies, who I must say were very attractive, but then they started talking about all of their ailments and it almost makes me afraid that I might accidently hurt them if we played. I want to provide pleasure, not pain.
Also a few were saying they went to a big party and it was mostly younger couples who were dirty dancing and flirting but not really playing and they felt the younger swingers are not as sexual as the older people are. One rationalized it by saying that maybe the fear of pregnancy is the issue.
We try to be ourselves at all times and if we find common interests with a couple younger or older then us, great. Since we are somewhere in the middle we can go higher or lower then our ages. We would go higher then our ages first because of the experience and maturity factors hoping their experience will provide us some fun and share their knowledge with us. We wonder what those at either end of the spectrum think and what is their biggest concerns. Great input so far from everyone so thank you for that.
Joe and Lori
Age is a number. It's attraction that matters. Some young people are turned off by what age does to one physically. Of course, that also varies from person to person. It's also reasonable to say that some older folks don't like the maturity level (or lack thereof) of the younger person. There are always exceptions to the rule. The main thing is attraction. You cannot fault anyone for their taste. There is no "dealing" with age differences. You're either attracted or you are not.
-D-
-D-
don-
sometimes I am amazed at your finness- very nicely put
jeremy
sometimes I am amazed at your finness- very nicely put
jeremy
We don't really think too much about age. We love people and have found that we can learn from anyone no matter the age. The sex and compatability can be just as good or bad at all ages. As long as the chemistry is there and all are comfortable that is all that matters to us. It's all about having fun. Life is too short to worry about age. As Martin Lawrence says, "Just ride this muthafucker till the wheels fall off. " Have a great day all.
R&S
R&S
Being on one end of the spectrum, age wise, I think it all has to do with how you are as a person and how you interact with people. I have two girlfriends, one 38 and the other is 47. My oldest child is 42 and the youngest is 32. We have played with people in almost every age group including younger than my youngest. I never think about age so long as they are at least 21.... legal in our state. I think one learns to judge people by their personality and their demenor. Some young couples are definitely not good play material and then some are super. So when we meet people we are meeting people not an age. We also don't generally play with people the first time we meet them... OTOH we have, on occasion, played with people almost instantly.. It all has to do with connection. Sometimes you feel like a nut...sometimes you don't.
Age is an issue that some people have simply because they have children that age or older, they are older than my parents(not an issue for us... parents are both gone....so people as old or older than parents would not be playing.. they'd be dead). they're; too fat, too skinny, too young, too old, to good looking, too ugly, too light, too dark.....all reasons not to have a good time or to make sure you don't exceed your own taboos or prejudices. Best way is to be a people person and let all things go and open up to the possibilities.
Just my thoughts....
Ray
Age is an issue that some people have simply because they have children that age or older, they are older than my parents(not an issue for us... parents are both gone....so people as old or older than parents would not be playing.. they'd be dead). they're; too fat, too skinny, too young, too old, to good looking, too ugly, too light, too dark.....all reasons not to have a good time or to make sure you don't exceed your own taboos or prejudices. Best way is to be a people person and let all things go and open up to the possibilities.
Just my thoughts....
Ray
We2, I can understand what you are saying. My first wife was 16 years older then I and my current wife is 6 years younger. First wife helped me to mature early and quickly and current wife keeps me young and on my toes. Seems like most everyone feels similar to us. Maybe the people having the conversation we were involved in should have said the younger swingers that were at the party they were referring to were not as mature instead of saying they are more into flirting and dirty dancing rather then playing.
Age is age, and just that, we have played with couples, much older and some much younger, and we just find that that is part of the spice that goes into all this. if we just wanted to be with one age group, it might take away from the excitement of why we got into swinging in the first place, we are here to meet fun, exciting people that share some of our interests, and if they are in their twenties thats fine, but on the other side if they are in their sixties it ok, because its not about age in any way for us, just fun. and that goes for any shape and size also, because if we start judging people that way, we know we might miss out on some real fun, hope you all have a great day
WE2ARE1INFL
you said it all..your the man
most girls don't know what there missing
with an older guy,
i like older guys !!
kristylynn
you said it all..your the man
most girls don't know what there missing
with an older guy,
i like older guys !!
kristylynn
Nicely said ray we both agree Bob&Mable
i know for us we very to find couples are age b/c we are younger than most we would like to stay close to our age,,,,,
I don't want to start a controversy, and then it cums, Why would age be an issue at all. Isn't the idea of swinging, first of all, about having fun with fantasy, and then there is the idea that swinging is not a mainstream activity; i.e., Not along the idea of "Normal" relationships or sex. Age is one of the norms in society and thus, I would think, one of those things that would go out the window if one is involved in swinging.
I bring this point up simply to hear why age would be an issue... I'm sure that there are people who are old and wrinkled and have bad breath and their plates are falling out and even the queen sized outfits or the XS lingerie would not fit....I mean if the lady is leaving 2 trails behind her, in the sand and she is getting her nipples scraped by that sand AND her plates are dirty and falling out and she had halatosis... Maybe she would not meet criteria to play with... unless one is in the same home with her and she snuck into your room and gave you oral sex while you were asleep. Or maybe it's the guy with the shriveled member, and that's after viagra and Enzyte and 2 other products, and he has slipped into your room and given you oral, and of course you are a lady....But Age should not be a single defining factor as to weather to play or not....
On the other end of that when people are "too young" . Are they out of diapers, eat solid food, over the legal age in your neck of the woods, and know what sex is and they have not stopped any clocks or watches in their immediate vacinity... They should be fair GAME.... I use the word game because it also denotes play which is what swingers call sex with others, other than their spouse....
So, how is age an issue or how does it become an issue...????? Of course there is preference but why close down oportunities.....????? Seems kind of counter productive to lose oportunities.
Just a nickle's worth of my thoughts on 2 hrs sleep in the last 48...
Ray
I bring this point up simply to hear why age would be an issue... I'm sure that there are people who are old and wrinkled and have bad breath and their plates are falling out and even the queen sized outfits or the XS lingerie would not fit....I mean if the lady is leaving 2 trails behind her, in the sand and she is getting her nipples scraped by that sand AND her plates are dirty and falling out and she had halatosis... Maybe she would not meet criteria to play with... unless one is in the same home with her and she snuck into your room and gave you oral sex while you were asleep. Or maybe it's the guy with the shriveled member, and that's after viagra and Enzyte and 2 other products, and he has slipped into your room and given you oral, and of course you are a lady....But Age should not be a single defining factor as to weather to play or not....
On the other end of that when people are "too young" . Are they out of diapers, eat solid food, over the legal age in your neck of the woods, and know what sex is and they have not stopped any clocks or watches in their immediate vacinity... They should be fair GAME.... I use the word game because it also denotes play which is what swingers call sex with others, other than their spouse....
So, how is age an issue or how does it become an issue...????? Of course there is preference but why close down oportunities.....????? Seems kind of counter productive to lose oportunities.
Just a nickle's worth of my thoughts on 2 hrs sleep in the last 48...
Ray
Again, age shouldn't be a problem unless it affects your attraction. Whether it be physical appearance or maturity level, attraction is the key. The number doesn't matter, the level of attraction does. We all have our own idea of beauty. For some, the effects of age are a factor. It could be a turn on or a turn off there is no "wrong answer".
I've seen older ladies that turn me on because they are confident and hold their age well. I've also seen when they have spent their entire life in tannning beds and under physicians' knives and look like walking corpses. On the same hand, I've seen younger women that are more mature than some 40-50 year old women and of course those that act like fucking retarded children. For me, attitude, character, maturity and confidence weigh in heavier than aesthetics.
-D-
I've seen older ladies that turn me on because they are confident and hold their age well. I've also seen when they have spent their entire life in tannning beds and under physicians' knives and look like walking corpses. On the same hand, I've seen younger women that are more mature than some 40-50 year old women and of course those that act like fucking retarded children. For me, attitude, character, maturity and confidence weigh in heavier than aesthetics.
-D-
We are not able to find a couple or even single our close to our age. Lucky for us we are open enough to look and like couples older than us. We believe that people close to our age are not secure enough or still are into just parting and dont know what life is about yet. We have been please to find out that couples in there 40 and early 50 still have alot to offer. We have also found that by hanging out with these older couples they will teach you alot about the lifestyle and life in general if you are open and looking for more than just a FUCK. Hope you all have a great day.
:z
J and A
:z
J and A
Discreet,
I just quit giving a fuck.
-D-
I just quit giving a fuck.
-D-