Being new to this arena, I (I'm the male half) have been cruising the site trying to get up to speed with terminology, getting a feel 
for the people out there, etc. Talk about variety! Anyway......
One term that keeps appearing is "drama". I know what drama is, believe me (that's why the ex-wife is ex). But since this term seems to be a common issue, there must be an inordinate amount of drama involved with the lifestyle?
Is the drama over the top or just the fact that it is counterproductive to getting it on?
Does anyone have an example of drama actually enhancing the experience?
for the people out there, etc. Talk about variety! Anyway......One term that keeps appearing is "drama". I know what drama is, believe me (that's why the ex-wife is ex). But since this term seems to be a common issue, there must be an inordinate amount of drama involved with the lifestyle?
Is the drama over the top or just the fact that it is counterproductive to getting it on?
Does anyone have an example of drama actually enhancing the experience?
In our experience, drama gets in the way of having fun. Usually drama is caused from insecurities, shyness, one spouse "forcing" the other to participate...
An example: We, having not had much luck with couples, were VERY excited to meet one where we all four got along nicely. We met for drinks once, sat for like 3 hours talking, then home for another 2 hours. Then their kids started to call. We decided that the following week we would meet up again. We spoke daily, laughing and asking, "Is it Saturday yet?"
They arrived, we sat and started to talk. Then the uncomfortable pause...Well...No one was making any moves or letting it be known that they were ready. Ice cream was mentioned, then another person liked it, it was suggested that someone put ice cream on their body...etc....
Well, the female half of them began to give our male a little oral fun, the male of them and us sat and watched...He did NOT move towards our female AT ALL. So she leaned over to him, figuring he was a little nervous, and said, "Why don't you join them...get warmed up..so we can move on?" He got up, went to the restroom, came out, BRIGHT red, and said to his wife, "Well, you have fun, I am gone!"
We were like, "What? What's going on?" He stated, "I came here to fuck HER (pointing at our female) NOT HER (pointing to his wife)...Why would I come to fuck HER (again, his wife), I have been fucking her for 20 fucking years!" and he stormed out!
I was so astonished, I could not even crack him in the mouth for speaking that way in front of women!
THAT IS WHAT DRAMA IS MY FRIEND!
Welcome to the lifestyle...
An example: We, having not had much luck with couples, were VERY excited to meet one where we all four got along nicely. We met for drinks once, sat for like 3 hours talking, then home for another 2 hours. Then their kids started to call. We decided that the following week we would meet up again. We spoke daily, laughing and asking, "Is it Saturday yet?"
They arrived, we sat and started to talk. Then the uncomfortable pause...Well...No one was making any moves or letting it be known that they were ready. Ice cream was mentioned, then another person liked it, it was suggested that someone put ice cream on their body...etc....
Well, the female half of them began to give our male a little oral fun, the male of them and us sat and watched...He did NOT move towards our female AT ALL. So she leaned over to him, figuring he was a little nervous, and said, "Why don't you join them...get warmed up..so we can move on?" He got up, went to the restroom, came out, BRIGHT red, and said to his wife, "Well, you have fun, I am gone!"
We were like, "What? What's going on?" He stated, "I came here to fuck HER (pointing at our female) NOT HER (pointing to his wife)...Why would I come to fuck HER (again, his wife), I have been fucking her for 20 fucking years!" and he stormed out!
I was so astonished, I could not even crack him in the mouth for speaking that way in front of women!
THAT IS WHAT DRAMA IS MY FRIEND!
Welcome to the lifestyle...
Drama here is a great example:
We had a cpl contact us we agreed to meet at a bar and get to know each others then they suggested they would be a bit pressed for time would we mind meeting at the lounge at their hotel we said sure we can do that. We met and believe it or not there was of all things a Baptist convention going on and the lounge was full of the convention people!
We suggested we go to their room now we have to explain it was THEM who contacted us and from the messages they sent they wanted to do it all even went so far as to say he wanted male on male play.
They sat on one bed and we sat on the other and talked for close to a hr. and one thing you don't do is tell my wife you are "pressed for time" she finally blurted out "are we going to fuck or what?"?
She figured they said they were pressed for time so she was going to speed up the process.
We then agreed and and swapped partners and was doing oral his wife was a multiple climax person and I had her cumming and cumming and cumming (I can eat pussy for a long time).
All of a sudden she said she needed a break got up and went into the bathroom he immediately jumped up and joined her then he came out of the bathroom and told us "I'm sorry we just can't do this we will stay in the bathroom and you are welcome to use the room".
We looked at each other like "What the fuck"? We packed our things and left and laughed most of the way home.
This cpl told us they had 3 yrs swinging experience but after chatting face to face with them them we determined they had only met with one single lady and they told us she did nothing but talk. So basically we were the first people they had actually played with even though they lied to us and told us they had 3 yrs experience.
The following day we got a message from her apologizing seems that he could not handle the fact his wife was being orally pleasured and the fact she had cum so many times she went on to explain he was upset because he couldn't make her cum like that orally and felt he was "not doing his job ". She said she was gong to call my wife and apologize and explain she never called. That my friends is a great example of "DRAMA" there is no place for jealousy in this lifestyle.
Norm&Sharon
We had a cpl contact us we agreed to meet at a bar and get to know each others then they suggested they would be a bit pressed for time would we mind meeting at the lounge at their hotel we said sure we can do that. We met and believe it or not there was of all things a Baptist convention going on and the lounge was full of the convention people!
We suggested we go to their room now we have to explain it was THEM who contacted us and from the messages they sent they wanted to do it all even went so far as to say he wanted male on male play.
They sat on one bed and we sat on the other and talked for close to a hr. and one thing you don't do is tell my wife you are "pressed for time" she finally blurted out "are we going to fuck or what?"?
She figured they said they were pressed for time so she was going to speed up the process.
We then agreed and and swapped partners and was doing oral his wife was a multiple climax person and I had her cumming and cumming and cumming (I can eat pussy for a long time).
All of a sudden she said she needed a break got up and went into the bathroom he immediately jumped up and joined her then he came out of the bathroom and told us "I'm sorry we just can't do this we will stay in the bathroom and you are welcome to use the room".
We looked at each other like "What the fuck"? We packed our things and left and laughed most of the way home.
This cpl told us they had 3 yrs swinging experience but after chatting face to face with them them we determined they had only met with one single lady and they told us she did nothing but talk. So basically we were the first people they had actually played with even though they lied to us and told us they had 3 yrs experience.
The following day we got a message from her apologizing seems that he could not handle the fact his wife was being orally pleasured and the fact she had cum so many times she went on to explain he was upset because he couldn't make her cum like that orally and felt he was "not doing his job ". She said she was gong to call my wife and apologize and explain she never called. That my friends is a great example of "DRAMA" there is no place for jealousy in this lifestyle.
Norm&Sharon
Thank you for the initial comments, JSTJIM72 and AMPUSSY! I think I learned more from your two replies than I have in the hours I've spent researching the site/people. Not a simple task, but fun.
Your comments were most helpful and an example of what I was hoping to find. I have seen frequent mention/complaints about people just wanting to chat, but how the heck else are folks like us going to learn and, hopefully, commence a new frontier?
Very thoughtful, thank you once again!
Your comments were most helpful and an example of what I was hoping to find. I have seen frequent mention/complaints about people just wanting to chat, but how the heck else are folks like us going to learn and, hopefully, commence a new frontier?
Very thoughtful, thank you once again!
Here's a nice one about drama.
I connected with a single woman who met my wife on many occasions before and during our relationship. She claimed to not be looking for anything more than some occasional fun. One day, we were both at a party only I was there with my wife and not her, she through a major tantrum, acting like she was the wife and my wife was the "other woman". Crazy woman for sure.
Then there is always the problem with people saying lets chat, and then never seeming to be able to agree on a time or place to meet in person. Chatting is great way to get to know someone, as long as it eventually leads to a meeting. If the people you chat with are within reach and yet never seem able to get away for a meeting, even a simple cup of coffee, then you have drama.
Hope some of this helps.
I connected with a single woman who met my wife on many occasions before and during our relationship. She claimed to not be looking for anything more than some occasional fun. One day, we were both at a party only I was there with my wife and not her, she through a major tantrum, acting like she was the wife and my wife was the "other woman". Crazy woman for sure.
Then there is always the problem with people saying lets chat, and then never seeming to be able to agree on a time or place to meet in person. Chatting is great way to get to know someone, as long as it eventually leads to a meeting. If the people you chat with are within reach and yet never seem able to get away for a meeting, even a simple cup of coffee, then you have drama.
Hope some of this helps.