Is it wrong for you or your wife to play alone as long as you know its going on and you both are ok with it. Kinda like she had a part time boyfriend and you had a part time girlfriend. It sounds exciting to us kinda taboo
We have dabbled in the "alone play" arena, we're not looking for a girlfriend or boyfriend...but we have had some fun with it. You really have to know and trust the other person of course.
This seems to be an area of all or nothing. Couples, like us, that do play alone, can't imagine leaving that aspect of swinging out of our repetoir. For us, the terminology girlfriend and boyfriend is something we avoid. Playing with Singles is fun, flirtatious and almost always easier to set up than hooking up with couples. (probably just because there is one less schedule to work around) The last thing we want is another committed relationship, one takes enough time and energy to make work! When it comes to singles it is definately all about the sex. I will admit that we have become good friends with many of the singles we play with, how can you not when you are sharing such intimate parts of yourselves, but I will never have a 'boyfriend' other than my husband 
Mrs. Curious
Mrs. Curious
we both will play alone, but only with couples we have been swinging with for a while, and usually but not always because one of us is out of town, no reason for the other not to have fun. and it's always exciting for one of us to pair up with half of another couple for some one on one fun while the spouses are away or busy. she will play at a just girls party and he will make himself scarce, but reap the benefits later. but when we meet someone new, either a single or a couple, we always meet as a couple
We will play solo, IF we are comfy with the individuals...BUT comfort is the key
IMO, when you get into "she has a boyfriend and he has a girlfriend", you are dabbling into polyamory.
To answer the question, It depends. What are the couple's rules? If I went behind the wife's back or she went behind mine, it would be wrong. However, if the rules permit it, play ball. This is assuming that all 4 people are aware of the situation.
To answer the question, It depends. What are the couple's rules? If I went behind the wife's back or she went behind mine, it would be wrong. However, if the rules permit it, play ball. This is assuming that all 4 people are aware of the situation.
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We prefer to play as a couple since that is part of the excitement for us. I feel that there is always a risk in this lifestyle (wanted or unwanted) to start to have feelings for a partner that you are playing with. Don't get me wrong, I don't believe that when you go somewhere and hook up with a stranger or friend that you will fall head over heels.. But when you get into the b-friend and g-friend scenario where your actually dating another person then there is a greater chance of developing feelings for this other person. How did you get to know your spouse and decide they were the one... by dating. I am sure that there are couples that do this and have absolutely no problem which is great. I personally just could not see dating other people to be beneficial to our relationship as we are in this as a couple and want to experience it as a couple.
♥Tami♥
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We prefer to play as a couple since that is part of the excitement for us. I feel that there is always a risk in this lifestyle (wanted or unwanted) to start to have feelings for a partner that you are playing with. Don't get me wrong, I don't believe that when you go somewhere and hook up with a stranger or friend that you will fall head over heels.. But when you get into the b-friend and g-friend scenario where your actually dating another person then there is a greater chance of developing feelings for this other person. How did you get to know your spouse and decide they were the one... by dating. I am sure that there are couples that do this and have absolutely no problem which is great. I personally just could not see dating other people to be beneficial to our relationship as we are in this as a couple and want to experience it as a couple.
♥Tami♥
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I will have to agree with Tami on this one. We know of a couples that told us, it started out fun, sex and playing. Then one was having a lot more fun than the other, got carried away with all the newness of dating, being pampered and started spending too much time with their new boyfriend/girlfriend. The other person in the relationship felt as if they were being replaced by someone else so the "you must like them more thing started". Why their relationship ended? One night the couple had a little spat and guess who the other person went to talk to. That is how simple things fell apart for them. We all know that when you just start dating someone everything you do is new and fun. I think you can only be dating the person that you are in a relationship with, just my thoughts
Boyfriend and girlfriend were a poor choice of wording, since it illicits visions of dating and them becoming emotionally involved in your life and all the potential harm that can come from it. Not that I'm saying that you shouldn't care at all about the people you get together with, but keeping perspective can get more difficult with a regular individual in the picture.
On the other hand, if you want to have a regular single that you got together with, as long as there is full disclosure all around it can certainly be a fun thing. Comfort and trust are VERY important in doing something like that so don't rush into it since there can be issues of personal safety and the potential for someone to become emotionally attached to you because of the regularity of your encounters. So as always it comes back to communication to keep things on the right track.
-SG
On the other hand, if you want to have a regular single that you got together with, as long as there is full disclosure all around it can certainly be a fun thing. Comfort and trust are VERY important in doing something like that so don't rush into it since there can be issues of personal safety and the potential for someone to become emotionally attached to you because of the regularity of your encounters. So as always it comes back to communication to keep things on the right track.
-SG
Very well said Tami and NakedN. I think alot of poeple "think" they can separate the two, sex and emotion, but lets face it we are all looking for something lacking in our own relationship's, whether it's trying something new, or someone diffrent to spice things up. I think there is also a fine line when it comes to certain things, and you need to find out what boundaries a couple has so that everyone is on the same page. It just boils down to respect... Just my thoughts, ~ MRS. UTHOT~
I am with Tammi one this one...we started this as a couple and I want it to stay as a couple....
I have some friends of ours....that when we met we met as a couple but it turns out they both play alone so it was kinda weired for us when every chance they get they try and lure us in to meeting alone....another thing that grabbed our attention was that because this couple plays alone the both sleep in separate rooms just so they won't bother the other ones sleep when they get home with there other play toy....that to us was a turn off...we have become friends but have not done anything with this couple...
I have some friends of ours....that when we met we met as a couple but it turns out they both play alone so it was kinda weired for us when every chance they get they try and lure us in to meeting alone....another thing that grabbed our attention was that because this couple plays alone the both sleep in separate rooms just so they won't bother the other ones sleep when they get home with there other play toy....that to us was a turn off...we have become friends but have not done anything with this couple...