I am not a fan of public humiliation or ridicule (airing dirty laundry) but I am thinking of creating a forum for others to post about list of flakes/fakes! Curious at the thoughts on this. Our concern is someone being nefarious and post something to hurt them (have had this happen to us). Needs to be done way to manage this nonsense. Between that and the predators!
Utahldscouple wrote:
I am not a fan of public humiliation or ridicule (airing dirty laundry) but I am thinking of creating a forum for others to post about list of flakes/fakes! Curious at the thoughts on this. Our concern is someone being nefarious and post something to hurt them (have had this happen to us). Needs to be done way to manage this nonsense. Between that and the predators!
From our experience that's going to be a very large list, you better make sure that they have the data storage needed, lol. Hopefully that'll include singles who lie about there age, they show up and are 10 to 15 years older than they claim to be, not necessarily a deal breaker, but we believe honesty is a must.
Frankandsheila3sum wrote:
From our experience that's going to be a very large list, you better make sure that they have the data storage needed, lol. Hopefully that'll include singles who lie about there age, they show up and are 10 to 15 years older than they claim to be, not necessarily a deal breaker, but we believe honesty is a must.
Sorry, I guess lying about their age would be considered being "fake", just airing out our frustration.
We understand the frustration of fakes, flakes and liars. We have also wanted to let others know about them. But, after a couple days pass, our anger/ frustration subsides. We think to ourselves that perhaps they had a good reason. We're probably wrong, but we tend to give people the benefit of doubt. Call us stupid, but we are very considerate people. I fear people will try to harm the reputation of those who don't deserve it. We've discovered that the flakes are frequently called out at events during our private conversations with others as we share stories with others.
Utahldscouple wrote:
I am not a fan of public humiliation or ridicule (airing dirty laundry) but I am thinking of creating a forum for others to post about list of flakes/fakes! Curious at the thoughts on this. Our concern is someone being nefarious and post something to hurt them (have had this happen to us). Needs to be done way to manage this nonsense. Between that and the predators!
I feel like most of the fake people I encounter are so obviously fake that I don't fall for them and I assume most don't. E.g. a really attractive single female with a profile that says nothing and all her pics look photoshopped, etc.
lol.
SHEPASKI wrote:There are a lot of profiles that pretend to be couples! And what about flakes? Those that never show up. Those aren't obvious! Have you ever flaked?Utahldscouple wrote:
I am not a fan of public humiliation or ridicule (airing dirty laundry) but I am thinking of creating a forum for others to post about list of flakes/fakes! Curious at the thoughts on this. Our concern is someone being nefarious and post something to hurt them (have had this happen to us). Needs to be done way to manage this nonsense. Between that and the predators!
I feel like most of the fake people I encounter are so obviously fake that I don't fall for them and I assume most don't. E.g. a really attractive single female with a profile that says nothing and all her pics look photoshopped, etc.
Sadly there is lots of flakes and fakes, not only on the single side, but also couples, it is frustrating when you planned something and the people doesn't showed up or canceled constantly, usually fake people doesn't have much information on theyr profile, or send you a random friend request without ever haven't talk to you or tried to make a connection. What you guys are trying to do is good, it is also a big hill to climb.
What about a positive forum for good approvals?
I can just see how the negative list, although a fine idea and likely needed, would become an ugly mess. I will just refer to Mr. Laypipe as an example. No one wants to see the accusations flying back and forth.
I can just see how the negative list, although a fine idea and likely needed, would become an ugly mess. I will just refer to Mr. Laypipe as an example. No one wants to see the accusations flying back and forth.
For positive referrals people can just use the comment section of profiles more frequently
Hard2Please wrote:
What about a positive forum for good approvals?
I can just see how the negative list, although a fine idea and likely needed, would become an ugly mess. I will just refer to Mr. Laypipe as an example. No one wants to see the accusations flying back and forth.
Oh god don’t say lay pipes name 3 times… he might appear like some sort of douche Beetlejuice.
We are coming out of retirement in February for my birthday. Glad to see nothing has changed😄
Maybe we'll just stay out of it and host a single male. So it begs the question of getting back into it or just staying retired? Because we ain't got the time for some flakes they make it to much work to have fun.
Maybe we'll just stay out of it and host a single male. So it begs the question of getting back into it or just staying retired? Because we ain't got the time for some flakes they make it to much work to have fun.
Sal4fun wrote:For the record we weren't calling out single males this was a general call out. We have seen lots of "couple" profiles that fall into the same category.
Sadly there is lots of flakes and fakes, not only on the single side, but also couples, it is frustrating when you planned something and the people doesn't showed up or canceled constantly, usually fake people doesn't have much information on theyr profile, or send you a random friend request without ever haven't talk to you or tried to make a connection. What you guys are trying to do is good, it is also a big hill to climb.
AWHOOTY wrote:For us the number is small but personally think the number should be zero. Don't understand how hard is it to say "Hey we aren't going to make it or can't make it". Or if you have no intent on meeting up why message in the first place? The thrill of the pursuit is just dumb, go to a singles pages because here it's like shooting fish in a barrel 😂!
We are coming out of retirement in February for my birthday. Glad to see nothing has changed😄
Maybe we'll just stay out of it and host a single male. So it begs the question of getting back into it or just staying retired? Because we ain't got the time for some flakes they make it to much work to have fun.
Utahldscouple wrote:There are a lot of profiles that pretend to be couples! And what about flakes? Those that never show up. Those aren't obvious! Have you ever flaked?SHEPASKI wrote:
[quote=Utahldscouple]I am not a fan of public humiliation or ridicule (airing dirty laundry) but I am thinking of creating a forum for others to post about list of flakes/fakes! Curious at the thoughts on this. Our concern is someone being nefarious and post something to hurt them (have had this happen to us). Needs to be done way to manage this nonsense. Between that and the predators!
I feel like most of the fake people I encounter are so obviously fake that I don't fall for them and I assume most don't. E.g. a really attractive single female with a profile that says nothing and all her pics look photoshopped, etc.
[/quote]
I've gotten really lucky and never really had a lot of problems with flakes. I typically try and only meet with people who have validations so that I know that they are real, and I require that we text on our phones instead of some app. From another aspect, what does anyone get out of flaking on someone? I just don't understand what the plausible motive could be.
Utahldscouple wrote:There are a lot of profiles that pretend to be couples! And what about flakes? Those that never show up. Those aren't obvious! Have you ever flaked?SHEPASKI wrote:
[quote=Utahldscouple]I am not a fan of public humiliation or ridicule (airing dirty laundry) but I am thinking of creating a forum for others to post about list of flakes/fakes! Curious at the thoughts on this. Our concern is someone being nefarious and post something to hurt them (have had this happen to us). Needs to be done way to manage this nonsense. Between that and the predators!
I feel like most of the fake people I encounter are so obviously fake that I don't fall for them and I assume most don't. E.g. a really attractive single female with a profile that says nothing and all her pics look photoshopped, etc.
[/quote]
I have definitely made plans and had to cancel due to something unforeseen, but I tell them as much as possible in advance. The lifestyle has never been my number one priority in life nor do I think it should be, but that's no excuse for not having common decency.
It is a ehhh idea. The concept has merit, but is fraught with potential abuses. In the end, a flake list will create more drama than it is worth. The flake lists's biggest downfall is there is no way to prevent someone legitimately added to the flake list from creating a new account to flake again. It is better to keep the flake with the same account and make a mental note (or a written note on their profile) that they are a flake. We are a small community, and word does get around.
There are a lot of fake profiles out there or people that just want to talk to get their rocks off. Nothing is worse then making plans and scheduling and then no one shows up or just a ghost. There is suck thing as common curtesy and manners. We think we need to write more positivity on the couple and singles that are real and worth it, then when you look at a profile you know who is serious and who to avoid.
Cpl4Fwb wrote:Good point. But that goes into a whole another process of actually verifying users and not letting multiple accounts easily as a new email address.
It is a ehhh idea. The concept has merit, but is fraught with potential abuses. In the end, a flake list will create more drama than it is worth. The flake lists's biggest downfall is there is no way to prevent someone legitimately added to the flake list from creating a new account to flake again. It is better to keep the flake with the same account and make a mental note (or a written note on their profile) that they are a flake. We are a small community, and word does get around.
We strenuously oppose the idea of a flake list, as it would create numerous issues. Nuuuuuuummmmmmeeeeeeerous issues. lol
Utahldscouple wrote:
I am not a fan of public humiliation or ridicule (airing dirty laundry) but I am thinking of creating a forum for others to post about list of flakes/fakes! Curious at the thoughts on this. Our concern is someone being nefarious and post something to hurt them (have had this happen to us). Needs to be done way to manage this nonsense. Between that and the predators!
I’m guessing you were Flaked out on.
Yes it sucks
My first thought, does this site have new ownership as others have said. If so, would there be a way to clean up the database and have some sort of moderation for the current site.
If someone wanted to troll half of the active user base by smearing them, is there even a way to fix it?
If a forum was to be created, as much as flakes and fakes could be an issue. I'd rather first know who may be a little more on the predatory side. We'd much rather know who has a history of trying to remove condoms or doesn't value consent.
If someone wanted to troll half of the active user base by smearing them, is there even a way to fix it?
If a forum was to be created, as much as flakes and fakes could be an issue. I'd rather first know who may be a little more on the predatory side. We'd much rather know who has a history of trying to remove condoms or doesn't value consent.
We agree.
JANDA14 wrote:Everyone has the issue, we rarely get it but when we do (1 out of 7 on a gangbang situation isn't bad) it is frustrating. When planning things like that you have to invite 8 to make sure 4 show up. That's why we created our own person list of males available for such activities so we can know what we are getting before planning them. It's a lot of work to work around flakes and fakes (those that say they are single and aren't, don't look like their pictures, lie about everything).Utahldscouple wrote:
I am not a fan of public humiliation or ridicule (airing dirty laundry) but I am thinking of creating a forum for others to post about list of flakes/fakes! Curious at the thoughts on this. Our concern is someone being nefarious and post something to hurt them (have had this happen to us). Needs to be done way to manage this nonsense. Between that and the predators!
I’m guessing you were Flaked out on.
Yes it sucks
couple4company wrote:Agree but same issue. There has to be a better way. We are always thinking better so hence the board to see. As for the ownership of this site, it is pretty non existent. I have tried to help and to get more hands on moderators and involvement.
My first thought, does this site have new ownership as others have said. If so, would there be a way to clean up the database and have some sort of moderation for the current site.
If someone wanted to troll half of the active user base by smearing them, is there even a way to fix it?
If a forum was to be created, as much as flakes and fakes could be an issue. I'd rather first know who may be a little more on the predatory side. We'd much rather know who has a history of trying to remove condoms or doesn't value consent.
Yeah, unless this site has better moderation or admin support I can't see a forum like that staying healthy long. A better validation system could work like other sites but again that means admin support.
A off site platform like discord may work but then you segment the users and everything becomes more private and hard to get access. But at least the users would have some control and vetting procedures.
A off site platform like discord may work but then you segment the users and everything becomes more private and hard to get access. But at least the users would have some control and vetting procedures.
Interesting thread. We have been in the lifestyle for 20+ years, in Vegas, NC, NJ, and now Utah. We have been to clubs all over the U.S and several other Country's. It was here in UT though, after messaging, texting and then talking, set up a casual meet at a bar, that we experienced our first no show. So, to us, it is definately this location that is unfortunately,attracting posers. We have met many fine people and made lots of friends here, it just seems there are more pretenders. Possibly due to the lack of on-premise clubs, a little harder to pretend you are a couple or you are both interested when it's in person. We do appreciate those that organize parties and open their homes. Thank you!