Can the term unorthodox even be used in this lifestyle? I don't know but, I post in part to hear about the fantasies of others and partly in hopes we will get lucky and another couple will see this, read our profile, and think we are compatible enough to reach out.
Perhaps finding a needle in a haystack would be easier. We have to believe there are similiar-minded people out there though....even if it is nothing more than parallel play (same room, same couple sex) or voyeurism which, is where we want to start anyway.
Here goes: I would like to experience another woman. However, my wife is currently not willing to do a traditional swap where she has one-on-one sex with another guy. She loves DP though. So, something we have talked about is allowing the male half of a couple to join us for DP (me vaginally, the other guy anally). At a later date, I would then be with that guys wife, one-on-one....as if she was a hotwife. A variation of this would be me serving as the second guy for their DP. Regardless, we would see it as a FWB situation.
There's the needle we are looking for. What needle are you looking for?
Perhaps finding a needle in a haystack would be easier. We have to believe there are similiar-minded people out there though....even if it is nothing more than parallel play (same room, same couple sex) or voyeurism which, is where we want to start anyway.
Here goes: I would like to experience another woman. However, my wife is currently not willing to do a traditional swap where she has one-on-one sex with another guy. She loves DP though. So, something we have talked about is allowing the male half of a couple to join us for DP (me vaginally, the other guy anally). At a later date, I would then be with that guys wife, one-on-one....as if she was a hotwife. A variation of this would be me serving as the second guy for their DP. Regardless, we would see it as a FWB situation.
There's the needle we are looking for. What needle are you looking for?
As with most fantasies that are this specific, I’d think it would need to happen naturally and unplanned somehow. With all the pieces falling into place. Unorthodox things have happened to us 😆
If there were a couple unknown to you out there wanting to do this there would be no guarantees the other wife would later fulfill a solo play date. Strangers have approached us before for a “ let us borrow your wife, later you can borrow ours” proposal, and we always roll our eyes at that. It’s obviously a threesome scam to us 🤷🏽♂️
We wouldn’t trust anyone that promised similar scenarios as a fair exchange unless they were ALREADY close friends that we’ve played with and trust. There’s a lot to be said about previous sexual history with a couple, and that’s worth a lot to us. That’s the fun thing with unrestricted swapping in this LS. Any scenario could be on the table with us because we’re comfortable doing pretty much everything with close friends of ours, and we have accommodated a couple unusual fantasies here and there with some of them.
We’d say be cautious with the friends you could make in search of this particular fantasy. Their motivations and promises may not be sincere, and there are no contracts in this LS to ensure it would ever happen the way you wanted.
If there were a couple unknown to you out there wanting to do this there would be no guarantees the other wife would later fulfill a solo play date. Strangers have approached us before for a “ let us borrow your wife, later you can borrow ours” proposal, and we always roll our eyes at that. It’s obviously a threesome scam to us 🤷🏽♂️
We wouldn’t trust anyone that promised similar scenarios as a fair exchange unless they were ALREADY close friends that we’ve played with and trust. There’s a lot to be said about previous sexual history with a couple, and that’s worth a lot to us. That’s the fun thing with unrestricted swapping in this LS. Any scenario could be on the table with us because we’re comfortable doing pretty much everything with close friends of ours, and we have accommodated a couple unusual fantasies here and there with some of them.
We’d say be cautious with the friends you could make in search of this particular fantasy. Their motivations and promises may not be sincere, and there are no contracts in this LS to ensure it would ever happen the way you wanted.
That seems like a fairly easy fantasy and request. After reading several of your comments on various topics, it seems that you have never had interaction at all with another couple. (We could be wrong, just an observation.)
Anyway, the question is. Why not do a soft swap first?
Just get with a couple that you connect well with. You can laugh and have a few drinks and get comfortable. You can work your way into flirting a little bit at her pace! Possibly a little bit of kissing and touching but no further. That seems to be a better way to ease into it things. Thoughts?
Anyway, the question is. Why not do a soft swap first?
Just get with a couple that you connect well with. You can laugh and have a few drinks and get comfortable. You can work your way into flirting a little bit at her pace! Possibly a little bit of kissing and touching but no further. That seems to be a better way to ease into it things. Thoughts?
Well said STARLIGHTS. 💋
I like your fantasy request! I feel that is a great way to approach getting what you want. Clearly communicate what it is you are looking for, followed up by clear communication from others involved...
With that said, no gaurantee the other couple will follow through....this is just a simple fact of the life style. Just because my wife and I may agree to full swap with another couple over texting....when we meet up and are in the moment, any one of the four can revoke consent at anytime for any reason period.
I could easily see your fantasy working out, first experience you and your wife get to enjoy a great DP threesome....if this all that happens, did you have a good time? Did everybody enjoy the experience? That's a win....
If everything still feels good with everybody then you can set up the second experience, for a fantastic mfm threesome.
We have had a few really good "first time" experiences, same room, parelell play, full swap....for whatever reason setting up the second experience seems to be a bit more difficult, schedules, planning, all the things can severely slow down or take the fun out of it......even when we all agree, "hey let's do this again!" It can be difficult.....
There are never any guarantees in this LS and I don't feel like there should be! Enjoy what is happening right now, right in front of you...
By the way...we really like setting up fantasies for our selves and our sexy friends😈
With that said, no gaurantee the other couple will follow through....this is just a simple fact of the life style. Just because my wife and I may agree to full swap with another couple over texting....when we meet up and are in the moment, any one of the four can revoke consent at anytime for any reason period.
I could easily see your fantasy working out, first experience you and your wife get to enjoy a great DP threesome....if this all that happens, did you have a good time? Did everybody enjoy the experience? That's a win....
If everything still feels good with everybody then you can set up the second experience, for a fantastic mfm threesome.
We have had a few really good "first time" experiences, same room, parelell play, full swap....for whatever reason setting up the second experience seems to be a bit more difficult, schedules, planning, all the things can severely slow down or take the fun out of it......even when we all agree, "hey let's do this again!" It can be difficult.....
There are never any guarantees in this LS and I don't feel like there should be! Enjoy what is happening right now, right in front of you...
By the way...we really like setting up fantasies for our selves and our sexy friends😈
Starlights wrote:
If there were a couple unknown to you out there wanting to do this there would be no guarantees the other wife would later fulfill a solo play date. Strangers have approached us before for a “ let us borrow your wife, later you can borrow ours” proposal, and we always roll our eyes at that. It’s obviously a threesome scam to us 🤷🏽♂️
We wouldn’t trust anyone that promised similar scenarios as a fair exchange unless they were ALREADY close friends that we’ve played with and trust. There’s a lot to be said about previous sexual history with a couple, and that’s worth a lot to us. That’s the fun thing with unrestricted swapping in this LS. Any scenario could be on the table with us because we’re comfortable doing pretty much everything with close friends of ours, and we have accommodated a couple unusual fantasies here and there with some of them.
We’d say be cautious with the friends you could make in search of this particular fantasy. Their motivations and promises may not be sincere, and there are no contracts in this LS to ensure it would ever happen the way you wanted.
Thanks. While putting this fantasy out there may have been putting the cart in front of the horse, we would only consider such a fantasy with people we have spent a fair amount of time around and had gotten to know well and trusted. Friends.
hyfax1 wrote:
That seems like a fairly easy fantasy and request. After reading several of your comments on various topics, it seems that you have never had interaction at all with another couple. (We could be wrong, just an observation.)
Anyway, the question is. Why not do a soft swap first?
Just get with a couple that you connect well with. You can laugh and have a few drinks and get comfortable. You can work your way into flirting a little bit at her pace! Possibly a little bit of kissing and touching but no further. That seems to be a better way to ease into it things. Thoughts?
Thanks. The only interaction we have had with another couple in this LS was watching them. Voyeurism. That said, we did meet a second couple and hang out with them. No sex by either party though.
Regarding soft swap: My wife is not interested in kissing, fondling, or being fondled by another man. As strange or shallow as it may sound to some, she would only be interested in using him for DP. And she does not want to be "done" as is so often portrayed in porn. She wants to be the one doing.
But, it is doubtful anything would happen unless we clicked and got to know the couple very well, became good friends, and eased into things with something light like voyeurism or parallel play.
Ruralcplfuntimes wrote:
I like your fantasy request! I feel that is a great way to approach getting what you want. Clearly communicate what it is you are looking for, followed up by clear communication from others involved...
With that said, no gaurantee the other couple will follow through....this is just a simple fact of the life style. Just because my wife and I may agree to full swap with another couple over texting....when we meet up and are in the moment, any one of the four can revoke consent at anytime for any reason period.
I could easily see your fantasy working out, first experience you and your wife get to enjoy a great DP threesome....if this all that happens, did you have a good time? Did everybody enjoy the experience? That's a win....
If everything still feels good with everybody then you can set up the second experience, for a fantastic mfm threesome.
We have had a few really good "first time" experiences, same room, parelell play, full swap....for whatever reason setting up the second experience seems to be a bit more difficult, schedules, planning, all the things can severely slow down or take the fun out of it......even when we all agree, "hey let's do this again!" It can be difficult.....
There are never any guarantees in this LS and I don't feel like there should be! Enjoy what is happening right now, right in front of you...
By the way...we really like setting up fantasies for our selves and our sexy friends😈
👍
Canvas wrote:
Thanks. The only interaction we have had with another couple in this LS was watching them. Voyeurism.
Regarding soft swap: My wife is not interested in kissing, fondling, or being fondled by another man. As strange or shallow as it may sound to some, she would only be interested in using him for DP. And she does not want to be "done" as is so often portrayed in porn. She wants to be the one doing.
But, it is doubtful anything would happen unless we clicked and got to know the couple very well, became good friends, and eased into things with something light like voyeurism or parallel play.
We don’t think it’s strange or shallow for your wife to be solely a voyeur. Everybody has the right to do what they’re comfortable with. At least you’re honest with yourself and others, and do not have unrealistic expectations.
Unfortunately if she does not want the touch or the feel of another man it’s going to be a nearly impossible fantasy to fulfill, and it sounds like you know this.
We like the idea of becoming close friends and trusting those people well before anything happened. We only interact with people that we know and trust well. That is very important to us.
We wish you the best of luck with your endeavors and hopefully you can find happiness whichever route do you take.
If you’d like to talk about this further feel free to send us a private message.
hyfax1 wrote:Canvas wrote:
Thanks. The only interaction we have had with another couple in this LS was watching them. Voyeurism.
Regarding soft swap: My wife is not interested in kissing, fondling, or being fondled by another man. As strange or shallow as it may sound to some, she would only be interested in using him for DP. And she does not want to be "done" as is so often portrayed in porn. She wants to be the one doing.
But, it is doubtful anything would happen unless we clicked and got to know the couple very well, became good friends, and eased into things with something light like voyeurism or parallel play.
We don’t think it’s strange or shallow for your wife to be solely a voyeur. Everybody has the right to do what they’re comfortable with. At least you’re honest with yourself and others, and do not have unrealistic expectations.
Unfortunately if she does not want the touch or the feel of another man it’s going to be a nearly impossible fantasy to fulfill, and it sounds like you know this.
Thanks for the additional reply. When I said "strange or shallow", I was referring to her wanting to use another man for DP and nothing else, including kissing or foreplay. She would not want him to enter the room until cued, then she would want him to get into position, and hold on to her hips/back while she used him. For a visual, go to Pornzog and search "amateur wife DP Ami".
Judging from the messages we've gotten, it seems it would be easy to find a willing guy. I think the challenge would be finding the right couple that is close enough that we could spend enough time with to become friends. 95+% of the people that have reached out since we've been on Swingular have been 2-6 hours away.
We’d recommend just start meeting couples. As long as we’ve seen you posting here, we’re surprised you haven’t taken at least that step… you have to realize it can take meeting 20 couples in person for you to find a couple you can actually have a meaningful friendship with… and that’s being optimistic. Some helpful advice would be… messaging for weeks to gage compatibility means absolutely nothing. You have to meet in person to REALLY know. Zoom or FaceTime is a cheap substitute for in person interaction.
Sex? That’s the easy part. Meaningful friendships are the hard part. Of the many, couples we’ve met, we have a few couples we consider real friends that have stuck. We’re event hosts, so we’ve met countless couples individually, and at our parties over the years.
So, we encourage you to get out there and meet. Otherwise your fantasies might just pass you by as you continue to write about them instead of actively fulfilling them.
Sex? That’s the easy part. Meaningful friendships are the hard part. Of the many, couples we’ve met, we have a few couples we consider real friends that have stuck. We’re event hosts, so we’ve met countless couples individually, and at our parties over the years.
So, we encourage you to get out there and meet. Otherwise your fantasies might just pass you by as you continue to write about them instead of actively fulfilling them.
Starlights wrote:
We’d recommend just start meeting couples. As long as we’ve seen you posting here, we’re surprised you haven’t taken at least that step… you have to realize it can take meeting 20 couples in person for you to find a couple you can actually have a meaningful friendship with… and that’s being optimistic. Some helpful advice would be… messaging for weeks to gage compatibility means absolutely nothing. You have to meet in person to REALLY know. Zoom or FaceTime is a cheap substitute for in person interaction.
Sex? That’s the easy part. Meaningful friendships are the hard part. Of the many, couples we’ve met, we have a few couples we consider real friends that have stuck. We’re event hosts, so we’ve met countless couples individually, and at our parties over the years.
So, we encourage you to get out there and meet. Otherwise your fantasies might just pass you by as you continue to write about them instead of actively fulfilling them.
Thanks for your input. We've met two couples (one we watched, the other we hung out together). Otherwise, you're correct. Our location, and current work schedule doesn't make meeting others as simple as it is for those of you in LS mecca. We can't just jump in the car and drive 6 hours to meet up for a drink, on the chance we might be compatible. By writing a bit (doesn't take weeks but does take a little effort), we can at the very least tell if we have similar interests and or ideals. And that, for us, is where it begins.
This may not be unorthodox in the lifestyle or for the topic.of this forum. Here is our recent experience as we dip our toes within the lifestyle. We have fantasized about another man joining for sometime now. Ideally, we have thought it would be hot that it happened naturally on our own date night. With us not knowing and learning how things work, we came to Swingular. We have chatted with some guys and one in particular we really enjoyed the conversation. We decided to make arrangements to meet at a low key bar for drinks and confirmed that we are still planning on meeting, and those plans were still a go. As the day arrived we went ahead and rented a room, due to the excitement and a little surprise for the guy. We had told him that we're new to this and upfront that this meet was with no expectations of sex, rather go with the flow. Unfortunately,.he never showed up and seems that he never planned on it. Is this because we said that there is no expectation of sex? Does having someone join naturally happen or do couples have so seek it through here? We went on with our night and decided to bar hop and had a blast. Thanks for reading
Lunas69 wrote:
This may not be unorthodox in the lifestyle or for the topic.of this forum. Here is our recent experience as we dip our toes within the lifestyle. We have fantasized about another man joining for sometime now. Ideally, we have thought it would be hot that it happened naturally on our own date night. With us not knowing and learning how things work, we came to Swingular. We have chatted with some guys and one in particular we really enjoyed the conversation. We decided to make arrangements to meet at a low key bar for drinks and confirmed that we are still planning on meeting, and those plans were still a go. As the day arrived we went ahead and rented a room, due to the excitement and a little surprise for the guy. We had told him that we're new to this and upfront that this meet was with no expectations of sex, rather go with the flow. Unfortunately,.he never showed up and seems that he never planned on it. Is this because we said that there is no expectation of sex? Does having someone join naturally happen or do couples have so seek it through here? We went on with our night and decided to bar hop and had a blast. Thanks for reading
The most likely reason your guy didn’t show up is because he was married and couldn’t get away from his family. Whether planned or not on his part.
We’ve heard this happen far too often, and has also happened to us with a “SM” my wife was talking to. She was actually about to leave to meet him, and he said he was driving there, but had to cancel. My guess is his wife asked him to get milk, and he wouldn’t be able to explain where he was to his family when he got home 😛
Most people online are just playing out fantasies with no real intentions of meeting up. Lots of fake profiles of couples that are actually single men, or married men where the wife has zero clue that they’re on here, or couples toying with the idea, but too afraid to take the steps.
You’ll likely hear a bunch of responses from SM here on this thread saying “those guys give SM a bad name, give me a chance” blah blah blah… but flaky SM seem to be the standard, not the exception. We also have instances where SM have flaked for our events… so we don’t bother inviting them anymore. Another anecdote we’ve collected from some acquaintances of ours… they had a “SM” they had been playing with in MFM threesomes for almost two years when they found out he was married and cheating. They were pissed and ended that immediately.
A no show meetup has never happened to us with a couple. I guess we’ve been lucky in that sense.
I believe if you split that fantasy in two parts it will be easier to fulfill it. Finding a male to be with you and your wife will be the easy part! Now, if the guy will just be a penis in the whole story, no kissing or fore playing with her, you better be upfront about that to avoid any issues!
The second half would be you joining another couple on a MFM. Which is harder to find, but more doable than a combination of the two fantasies with the same couple! IMHO
The second half would be you joining another couple on a MFM. Which is harder to find, but more doable than a combination of the two fantasies with the same couple! IMHO
Starlights wrote:This is so accurate!Lunas69 wrote:
This may not be unorthodox in the lifestyle or for the topic.of this forum. Here is our recent experience as we dip our toes within the lifestyle. We have fantasized about another man joining for sometime now. Ideally, we have thought it would be hot that it happened naturally on our own date night. With us not knowing and learning how things work, we came to Swingular. We have chatted with some guys and one in particular we really enjoyed the conversation. We decided to make arrangements to meet at a low key bar for drinks and confirmed that we are still planning on meeting, and those plans were still a go. As the day arrived we went ahead and rented a room, due to the excitement and a little surprise for the guy. We had told him that we're new to this and upfront that this meet was with no expectations of sex, rather go with the flow. Unfortunately,.he never showed up and seems that he never planned on it. Is this because we said that there is no expectation of sex? Does having someone join naturally happen or do couples have so seek it through here? We went on with our night and decided to bar hop and had a blast. Thanks for reading
The most likely reason your guy didn’t show up is because he was married and couldn’t get away from his family. Whether planned or not on his part.
We’ve heard this happen far too often, and has also happened to us with a “SM” my wife was talking to. She was actually about to leave to meet him, and he said he was driving there, but had to cancel. My guess is his wife asked him to get milk, and he wouldn’t be able to explain where he was to his family when he got home 😛
Most people online are just playing out fantasies with no real intentions of meeting up. Lots of fake profiles of couples that are actually single men, or married men where the wife has zero clue that they’re on here, or couples toying with the idea, but too afraid to take the steps.
You’ll likely hear a bunch of responses from SM here on this thread saying “those guys give SM a bad name, give me a chance” blah blah blah… but flaky SM seem to be the standard, not the exception. We also have instances where SM have flaked for our events… so we don’t bother inviting them anymore. Another anecdote we’ve collected from some acquaintances of ours… they had a “SM” they had been playing with in MFM threesomes for almost two years when they found out he was married and cheating. They were pissed and ended that immediately.
A no show meetup has never happened to us with a couple. I guess we’ve been lucky in that sense.
Canvas wrote:We have a feeling you may be able to find the first part easy to fulfill but when it comes time for your turn to join the other couple there will be a million excuses why it can't happen. This scenario is not our thing but we have seen that happen to many of our friends.
Can the term unorthodox even be used in this lifestyle? I don't know but, I post in part to hear about the fantasies of others and partly in hopes we will get lucky and another couple will see this, read our profile, and think we are compatible enough to reach out.
Perhaps finding a needle in a haystack would be easier. We have to believe there are similiar-minded people out there though....even if it is nothing more than parallel play (same room, same couple sex) or voyeurism which, is where we want to start anyway.
Here goes: I would like to experience another woman. However, my wife is currently not willing to do a traditional swap where she has one-on-one sex with another guy. She loves DP though. So, something we have talked about is allowing the male half of a couple to join us for DP (me vaginally, the other guy anally). At a later date, I would then be with that guys wife, one-on-one....as if she was a hotwife. A variation of this would be me serving as the second guy for their DP. Regardless, we would see it as a FWB situation.
There's the needle we are looking for. What needle are you looking for?
Gf is a cuckquean and only likes to watch/hear about it. Hard to find other girls/couples that are into it.. though she would peg the male half of another couple. lol
This may not seem too unorthodox to many but it has been impossible to orchestrate thus far. She has a fantasy of being used blindfolded by a stranger or even a strange couple. I (Mr.) would be doing all of the vettting and logistics as she would be essentially blindsided by the whole thing. Rough scenario being her blindfolded and restrained in a hotel room and having someone (or a couple) unfamiliar to her come in and absolutely use her and leave without her ever knowing who it was. All of her trust would be squarely on my shoulders so I would be right by her through the whole process.
If anyone has some pointers on how to make bringing this to life a little easier, I'm all ears.
If anyone has some pointers on how to make bringing this to life a little easier, I'm all ears.
Call me pessimistic💁🏻♀️. But it seems like you/y’all have had some terrible experiences. And maybe you are right in your opinions, but damn. The way you text seems like you are putting the worst possible scenario in everyone’s heads.
SM pretending is legit a cause for concern on this platform and it’ll continue to be. With the LS being ever so growing, you’ll get more and more SM like that.
I prefer to give the benefit of the doubt. But hey to each their own 🤷🏻♀️😜
SM pretending is legit a cause for concern on this platform and it’ll continue to be. With the LS being ever so growing, you’ll get more and more SM like that.
I prefer to give the benefit of the doubt. But hey to each their own 🤷🏻♀️😜
OohThatLooksFun wrote:
This may not seem too unorthodox to many but it has been impossible to orchestrate thus far. She has a fantasy of being used blindfolded by a stranger or even a strange couple. I (Mr.) would be doing all of the vettting and logistics as she would be essentially blindsided by the whole thing. Rough scenario being her blindfolded and restrained in a hotel room and having someone (or a couple) unfamiliar to her come in and absolutely use her and leave without her ever knowing who it was. All of her trust would be squarely on my shoulders so I would be right by her through the whole process.
If anyone has some pointers on how to make bringing this to life a little easier, I'm all ears.
We have talked about a similar scenario where I do the vetting in our DP fantasy. I find the right guy, organize it all, he comes in on my signal, lets my wife use him, then leaves without her seeing him. For whatever reasons, that's a more comfortable scenario for my wife than my preferred FWB scenario. That said, our discussions on this, and the LS in general, are taking place more often and evolving. Who knows what might become of this!
Canvas ( wife); the art of fantasy is that it is of your internal desire. If it is your fantasy, it will only be of the best passion, if you achieve YOUR fantasy. Hold strong, and know, it is very likely you will have your moment. There is no benefit of your lustful desire if you allow others to bend your true fantasy. Often, in good intent, others will try and help you see another path to getting closer to what you seek. The hard reality, many take the path, may even enjoy part of the journey, yet still have disappointment that they didn't experience what was the true desire. If inviting another in, be clear of what you want. You WILL find some very accommodating and wonderful people who will gift themselves to you. In closing, if this is something that excites you, it tingles in your mind, and you know how you dream of it happening,,,,take your time and find it. When you do, it will be bliss. Both you and your husband will relish in the sultry energy and most definitely enhance your private naughty talk. It may even crack the door to other interest when YOU decide you have that. I hope this only added reassurance to you.