Just interested in how people tend to get into separate play, if they do? Is it usually separate room but the m/f half of the other couple, so a trade off? Or usually separate with each partner finding their own? Or it starts as potential for couple trade off but only one partner is interested?
(Mrs here) and especially interested to know, maybe for me and maybe to help set Mr up. We can text if interested.
If you friend request please introduce yourself also
(Mrs here) and especially interested to know, maybe for me and maybe to help set Mr up. We can text if interested.
If you friend request please introduce yourself also
This is definitely dependent on the situation. Each couple is different. We are only same room never separate play. If there is a male half (usually never just a female half) of a couple we won't do that either. When part of a couple we want to be with the couple, just creates less drama (even in the so called hall passes are involved). There are a lot of couples that like separate room for many reason. We personally like to watch 
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!We have only played same room also. Just interested how others do it to see if it's something we would entertain.
We started this adventure only playing together, but rather quickly found that there would be opportunities arise where we both would not be available at the same time. So far playing apart has never been uncomfortable. Honestly, it's something we both enjoy, knowing that while we are at work or involved in some other activity our beloved is in passions hot embrace. We've both have met with just one person, and or a couple or two by ourselves. We've been really involved in family activities since our kids started having kids, and like to come hang out, so we were quite a bit less active even before the damned pandemic. So playing alone, just like playing together hasn't happened for, gee, when was the last time?
We started our relationship seeing other people, and continue to do so, so my opinions may not help... but
I do think it has a lot to do with managing trust and jealousy for a lot of couples. If you’ve never heard of the word “Compersion”, look up articles about it. It basically talks about how you find fulfillment in knowing your other half is happy... that isn’t to say you never feel a tinge of jealousy. It’s just that you have found a healthy way to manage it because you know that if your partner is happy that makes you happy as well.
A large part of this LS is just that. You knowing they’re enjoying themselves with other people... the trick (I think) to separate, or even solo play, is knowing (and being okay with) them enjoying sex WITHOUT your involvement. Whether that’s in a separate room, or without you even being present at all. It can actually be a turn on eventually. It is for us 🤷🏽♂️
Their enjoyment in sex, or life in general should not be contingent on you. At least IMO
This is a great conversation to be had. I’d love to hear others’ input. I’m not saying I’m right, and I’m not saying anyone else’s views are wrong. I know how the Internet can be. I’m just saying what has worked for us.
I do think it has a lot to do with managing trust and jealousy for a lot of couples. If you’ve never heard of the word “Compersion”, look up articles about it. It basically talks about how you find fulfillment in knowing your other half is happy... that isn’t to say you never feel a tinge of jealousy. It’s just that you have found a healthy way to manage it because you know that if your partner is happy that makes you happy as well.
A large part of this LS is just that. You knowing they’re enjoying themselves with other people... the trick (I think) to separate, or even solo play, is knowing (and being okay with) them enjoying sex WITHOUT your involvement. Whether that’s in a separate room, or without you even being present at all. It can actually be a turn on eventually. It is for us 🤷🏽♂️
Their enjoyment in sex, or life in general should not be contingent on you. At least IMO
This is a great conversation to be had. I’d love to hear others’ input. I’m not saying I’m right, and I’m not saying anyone else’s views are wrong. I know how the Internet can be. I’m just saying what has worked for us.
Totally agree about the compersion statement above from starlights. We started off playing just in the same room. With weird schedules and feeing pressure of being in the same room, however, M ended up connecting with an old friend for a one on one and T ended up doing the same thing. It was not nearly as problematic as one would think. Those singles have since moved and at this time we don’t have separate play partners but we did enjoy it.
I also think it’s more about finding the right people than trying to force a certain kind of relationship. Maybe with one couple same room is more fun, maybe with another separate room works better. Go with the flow as they say!
I also think it’s more about finding the right people than trying to force a certain kind of relationship. Maybe with one couple same room is more fun, maybe with another separate room works better. Go with the flow as they say!
To the degree we can learn to shed our ego, the more we can be present in the moment and enjoy pleasure, be it our own, or others pleasure.
Definitely all about trust. We quite enjoy playing separate! A lot of times we start in the same room and move to separate rooms. They are both amazing!!
Earlier we both had separate play partners. Because of kids, school and work we all had to meet separately. We were all aware of each other and had all met before and we agreed and were comfortable playing separately. I would go visit him and hubby would visit her whenever we could. Weekly at least so we didnt make a habit of making excuses or falling away from each other. But unfortunately life happens and they had to return back. However we do have the experience and trust for me and the hubby to move forward again with possible similar situations in the future. We just have to keep the communication up always.
just4funxxx11 wrote:
Just interested in how people tend to get into separate play, if they do? Is it usually separate room but the m/f half of the other couple, so a trade off? Or usually separate with each partner finding their own? Or it starts as potential for couple trade off but only one partner is interested?
(Mrs here) and especially interested to know, maybe for me and maybe to help set Mr up. We can text if interested.
If you friend request please introduce yourself also
The decision only you can make. But that will also depend on your communication as a couple, so that no drama is generated between you. The only thing you can do is talk it over among yourselves and decide to play 1 time in separate rooms.
For us....we tend to start everything together to make sure the other half is also having fun. Our one rule is “everyone has fun” nobody gets left out. Some nights stay in the same room and other nights one of us may lead our new toy off and let everyone focus on what they are doing 😉
Once there is a couple we have gotten to know very well play time can be whenever it works....
Make it out to Southern Florida? 😘
Once there is a couple we have gotten to know very well play time can be whenever it works....
Make it out to Southern Florida? 😘
Hi new to lifestyle so much I want to learn
This is a very interesting topic, we have a open marriage also and have met and played with some of you. We are open to meet others as well. kik DChorse . I love all the ideas.
We probably started separate play at a party. Find a partner and move to another room for more fun. We trust each other and share details after participation with others. When we entertain another couple I ask if my prospective partner would like to get naked. I may tell my wife and her partner to join us or if we have asked the other couple if they play separate and they said yes then I may not invite them. We usually end the evening naked with everyone together hopefully in the same bed. We try to always be flexible but I prefer separate room so I can give my full attention to my partner.
Our worry is unilateral issues -if one individual (from a couple) wants to play out of the gate, we can’t securely know it’s something that is approved by the other party (the other member of that couple).
We want trust and communication and would need to have the whole group buy-in.
Nonetheless, for us, we enjoy the group setting and it’s worth waiting for that right couple.
We want trust and communication and would need to have the whole group buy-in.
Nonetheless, for us, we enjoy the group setting and it’s worth waiting for that right couple.
BEACHLOVERS wrote:
Definitely on our list of things to do. Security for our Mrs's is absolutely a concern if playing with anyone we haven't met before. A situation that may work is the male 1/2's play with the couple alone for the first few meetings, then the Mrs' may feel more comfortable joining the other couple on her own. Who wants to give it a go with us?
I’m not going to lie. Safety for her is where it comes from for us too.
Can you explain hall pass?
A hall pass is were you let your partner have some fun in the side without guilt. It can be very exciting to know they are having a sexy encounter and bringing a great story home to share. Not for the jealous types however.
Easy peasy. Step 1. Check everyone's vaccination cards. Step two. Go into separate rooms or even separate buildings (separate cities or states are optional) and get naked. Step three. Play.