We are newer to this lifestyle and find that certain people continue to amaze us. While most of the people we have talked to and met have been awesome and great people, you still seem to have the questionable ones. Let us explain and then we ask that you provide your feedback.
We met a couple on-line (not on this site) and had been communicating many times with them for two
We met a couple on-line (not on this site) and had been communicating many times with them for two
Ok my 2 cents:
1) Should people with STD
1) Should people with STD
This is something that worried me from the beginning and still does.
I agree 100% they should not be in the lifestyle but how does one know, you can ask them up front but who's to know they are telling the truth short of producing a recent medical certificate.
I agree 100% they should not be in the lifestyle but how does one know, you can ask them up front but who's to know they are telling the truth short of producing a recent medical certificate.
This also is my biggest fear. Just becuz we wanna have fun doesnt mean we wanna live with a disease for the rest of our lives. It isnt a price I wanna pay to have fun. It just KILLS me when a couple will say to us....when protection is brought up as a subject and they say..."oh we are fixed, or Oh we cant get pregnant" so protection isnt necassary.. WHAT!!!! That isnt the only reason you need fucking protection ppl! Ever heard of STD's!!! I wanna bomp them upside the head! Its a tuff call if it were me with the STD I just wouldnt be in the lifestyle it isnt fair for others. You cant really trust anyone to be completely honest with you which suxs, cuz you wanna trust ppl you get to know. This was a worry of ours very much so what I wanna know is....if a couple isnt honest with you and they do have herpes and you use protection is there still the chance of getting it...if the answer is YES...then man...what do ya do serisouly...I guess QUIT!! We are very selective with whom we play around with, but DAM!
"Oral herpes, an infection caused by the herpes simplex virus, is estimated to be present in 50 to 80 percent of the American adult population. 20 percent, over 50 million people, are infected with genital herpes, also caused by the herpes simplex virus, and the majority of these cases may be unaware they even have it. Studies show that more than 500,000 Americans are diagnosed with genital herpes each year, and the largest increase is occurring in young teens." - from Herpes.com
Ask any doctor. They will tell you that 50-80% of sexually active people under the age of 50 in the United States alone have some form of herpes, whether it be oral or genital. MOST of them have never had an outbreak and are not aware that they even have it, which is why it is spreading at such an alarming rate.
Herpes is a virus, there is no cure but it is non-fatal. There are treatments that all but prevent outbreaks. But a person can still spread herpes at ANY time, not just during an outbreak (which are generally 2-10 days in duration). It can be spread from mouth to the genitals and vice versa. Condoms do prevent transmission, but how many of us give oral with a condom on?
Bottom line is, a LOT more people have herpes simplex A, B and C then is commonly known.
And it is impossible to distinguish someone with herpes from someone without it, unless that person is currently having an outbreak. Be careful of how quickly you snub your nose at people who know and admit they have it....odds are that if you're sexually active, you have it in some form or another.
Ask any doctor. They will tell you that 50-80% of sexually active people under the age of 50 in the United States alone have some form of herpes, whether it be oral or genital. MOST of them have never had an outbreak and are not aware that they even have it, which is why it is spreading at such an alarming rate.
Herpes is a virus, there is no cure but it is non-fatal. There are treatments that all but prevent outbreaks. But a person can still spread herpes at ANY time, not just during an outbreak (which are generally 2-10 days in duration). It can be spread from mouth to the genitals and vice versa. Condoms do prevent transmission, but how many of us give oral with a condom on?
Bottom line is, a LOT more people have herpes simplex A, B and C then is commonly known.
And it is impossible to distinguish someone with herpes from someone without it, unless that person is currently having an outbreak. Be careful of how quickly you snub your nose at people who know and admit they have it....odds are that if you're sexually active, you have it in some form or another.
There is absolutely no difference between HSV1 and HSV2 The bottom line is where the virus resides. One of these days the powers to be will dispell the myth about 2 different virus'. HSV1 is the one on or in the mouth. It can be spreas to the genitilia via contact via going down on the other person. Approximate 93 - 96 % of the population of the world would test positive for Herpies Simplex Virus (HSV). The test doesn't devine which strain it is since there is no difference, it's only where it resides and presents it's self. One person who commented about A, B & C may have been confused as these designations refer to Hepatitis. Hepatitis B is the potentially deadly virus... a sometimes fatal hepatitis caused by a double-stranded DNA virus (genus Orthohepadnavirus of the family Hepadnaviridae) that tends to persist in the blood serum and is transmitted especially by contact with infected blood (as by transfusion) or blood products -- called also serum hepatitis.
IN the lifestyle one is more likely to get a common cold or strep throat than a STD although Herpies is a chance as is Chlamydia. Neither is life threatening and Herpies is managable and chlamydia is curable with drugs. The other badboy is HPV which is possible but again this is a family of some 200 + related virus strains and about 90 + % of the population will test positive for HPV. Planters warts is in that family. Lately we have heard on TV that HPV causes uterine cancer. Notice lately that they have changed the ads to say it can or it may cause ... ONly 5 or 6 of the various strains can be dangerous. HPV can be seen as warts in the genital area... So who doesn't look? IF you don't you should. HPV is a contact transfer and not related to bodily fluids. If someone has warts they are able to spread the virus. A condom will not protect from warts on the body in the genital area.
So people with STD's should inform right up front as to what it is that they have so that you can make an informed decission.
1) Should people with STD
IN the lifestyle one is more likely to get a common cold or strep throat than a STD although Herpies is a chance as is Chlamydia. Neither is life threatening and Herpies is managable and chlamydia is curable with drugs. The other badboy is HPV which is possible but again this is a family of some 200 + related virus strains and about 90 + % of the population will test positive for HPV. Planters warts is in that family. Lately we have heard on TV that HPV causes uterine cancer. Notice lately that they have changed the ads to say it can or it may cause ... ONly 5 or 6 of the various strains can be dangerous. HPV can be seen as warts in the genital area... So who doesn't look? IF you don't you should. HPV is a contact transfer and not related to bodily fluids. If someone has warts they are able to spread the virus. A condom will not protect from warts on the body in the genital area.
So people with STD's should inform right up front as to what it is that they have so that you can make an informed decission.
1) Should people with STD
XPLOR....your right about the A, B and C...that was a mistype on my part. And good point about if you have ever had a cold sore should you be in the lifestyle...great point actually.
The information posted in my reply as well as XPLOR's is accurate. The truth is most people who have it don't know it, and they continue to spread it ignorantly. So, it doesn't matter if someone tells you they don't have it...they may not know they do.
The information posted in my reply as well as XPLOR's is accurate. The truth is most people who have it don't know it, and they continue to spread it ignorantly. So, it doesn't matter if someone tells you they don't have it...they may not know they do.
Totally agree with you Mrs HUNT4U88. People who unfortunately did catch some thing from someone else, NEED to be honest and upfront. Not trying to continue beatin' a dead horse but that is why we throughly screen all who we think we would like to play with. And a friend will most likely (in our eyes anyway) be more upfront then just some stranger who wants to get their rocks off. Thus the reason we say "we don't play with strangers".
That's our 2 cents, but for us it's worth a million dollars.
Take Care everyone and please play safe
That's our 2 cents, but for us it's worth a million dollars.
Take Care everyone and please play safe
Very interesting and infomative info. It is interesting to hear that if you have ever had a cold sore, or a planters wart that is in the form of Herpes....who hasnt had one or the other??? However, I would be much more comfy playen with couples that may have had or have a cold sore on their mouth then on their private area's....WHY is that??? Is it the same thing just in another place??? I guess it is just less appealing to someone if a "cold sore" is on your genital area!! This, as I mentioned, earlier has been such a fear for my husband and I from day one. We also have respect for that couple that disclosed the information to the posting couple b4 they showed up for some action. Very mature of them!!! If they wouldnt have said anything, and any action did occur,....can you see the herpes if they are in active mode??? I am assuming you can do they look like a cold sore in some sort of form??? We need to get more educated on this, we are both so nieve, but yet we want to be careful...go figure!! We are sooo selective with whom we play with, and we only do with a select few friends for this very reason. We like to meet with our friends and be exclusive with them, which is what we have been doing for the past 6-8 months. It is a heck of a lot more secure for us, and we fee safer. If we were to add to our circle of "play friends" what do you do,....make a first date to go get tested all together??? just to prove you are all free of any STD. We like to trust ppl when we get to know them, or at least beable to trust them. You have to wonder...is all this worry and wonder worth the fun??? This is an awesome informative forum, BTW!!!
Ok heres our thoughts on this .... Even if you ask someone if they are dd free & they say yes how can you be sure aids sometimes lay dormit for 7 years you can have it & not even know it. we only play bareback if we know the people very well..I hate to wear a raincoat but will . If you play you have a chance to get stds . I hate to say it but if you play you take the chance to pay...
There is a bottom line here.... The place to start is know who you are playing with. The more you know about them the better the chances are that you'll know how and with whom they play... Safer sex is a must. SOmeone went through the thing about dental dams and rubbers with oral sex.... The reality is, or maybe it's common beliefs both in and out of the medical community, that there is something about oral sex, saliva and acids in the mouth that help protect against STD's... So STD's from oral are greatly reduced regardless with the exception of HSV. Someone with a cold sore or who just had a cold sore may still be infectious otherwise they are not. And to answer someone elses querry, Yes you can see a herpies cancer in or on the genitalia. It will look like a cold sore typically in the early stages that one sees on the mouth a bright reddish to blue reddish bump and it may be ulcerated as in the later stages. Go to you public health office and see what programs are available in your area. There are some good films which illustrate quite vividly what various STD's may look like and classes are available in many areas to teach about STD's.
I started by saying that there is a bottom line.... Your chances of getting a serious STD within the lifestyle is very small, however protection with penetration reduces risks to a manageable limit. Chances to catch germs etc are in the following order of chance:
1st Colds,
2nd Flu,
3rd Chlamydia,
4th Herpies,
5th HPV,
then things like gonorrhea and syphisis
The more educated you are about these things the better you can avoid them. If you don't like the odds the it's kind of like the old saying; If you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen..... OTOH, IF you are educated and concerned enough about your own health and the health of your mate and other partners you may play with, then you will play safer..... 1st by being educated then by knowing your sex partners or playmates, and finally by using whatever means necessary to keep yourself and your partners safe. Condoms do not kill feel unless your nerves are not very sensitive. But would you rather have your sensitivity deadened, a little, or take the chances of becomming dead or with a desease that stays with you for life.
Evaluate the risk and benefits.... Only you know where to invest your future... (got that from a stock commercial... though this needed a little humor... Stocks are much too risky..LMFAO)
I started by saying that there is a bottom line.... Your chances of getting a serious STD within the lifestyle is very small, however protection with penetration reduces risks to a manageable limit. Chances to catch germs etc are in the following order of chance:
1st Colds,
2nd Flu,
3rd Chlamydia,
4th Herpies,
5th HPV,
then things like gonorrhea and syphisis
The more educated you are about these things the better you can avoid them. If you don't like the odds the it's kind of like the old saying; If you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen..... OTOH, IF you are educated and concerned enough about your own health and the health of your mate and other partners you may play with, then you will play safer..... 1st by being educated then by knowing your sex partners or playmates, and finally by using whatever means necessary to keep yourself and your partners safe. Condoms do not kill feel unless your nerves are not very sensitive. But would you rather have your sensitivity deadened, a little, or take the chances of becomming dead or with a desease that stays with you for life.
Evaluate the risk and benefits.... Only you know where to invest your future... (got that from a stock commercial... though this needed a little humor... Stocks are much too risky..LMFAO)
There are alot of good points here. My husband & I are always wooried about STD"S aswell, but it is deffinatly a risk in this lifestyle. I think it was gr8 that the couple was honest with you about having an std , realistic how many would be? We are very honest & upfront pple & would like to get the same treatment back, but unfortunatly you are dealing with the " honor" system when it comes to other people. We wouldnt "snub" anybody for having a std, but we wouldnt be comfortable " playing" either. No offense to anybody, but I think that is just a natural reaction. I agree that it is better to get to know your playbuddies first. We prefer condoms , but I think we have all been in a heat of the moment situation at some point in our life. I guess what it comes down to is personal choice.... we are dd free & obviously want the same back ... but for the pple who arent I deffinatly think they should be upfront & either put in profile or let us know in the inital chat when you are getting to know eachother .
Thank you to eveyone that has given their two cents and more, LOL. We have had a lot of comments here and in our private message box that others feel very much the same way as we questioned.
It was also said by several that want to learn but not offend others, that they would like this to be kept in the forefront for the next while to get more postings. Please share your thoughts more so we can ALL BE EDUCATED, PLAY SAFE and all feel as secure as we can!
It was also said by several that want to learn but not offend others, that they would like this to be kept in the forefront for the next while to get more postings. Please share your thoughts more so we can ALL BE EDUCATED, PLAY SAFE and all feel as secure as we can!
there is a swingers site for people with herpes,
generally one would want to become friends before having sex, if you are in contact regularly, they are not going to infect you intentionally, so dont have one night stands and sex with people whos identities are unknown. also any virus can be killed by making it resonate, the resonating frequencie for herpes is
simplex1, 291.25-293.05 KHz
simplex2, 353.9-362.9 KHz
zoster, 416.6--420.2
one would need to purchase a frequency generator
i got mine at www.drclark.com, and no i dont have herpes, the fact is that every parasite and virus has its own resonating frequecie
generally one would want to become friends before having sex, if you are in contact regularly, they are not going to infect you intentionally, so dont have one night stands and sex with people whos identities are unknown. also any virus can be killed by making it resonate, the resonating frequencie for herpes is
simplex1, 291.25-293.05 KHz
simplex2, 353.9-362.9 KHz
zoster, 416.6--420.2
one would need to purchase a frequency generator
i got mine at www.drclark.com, and no i dont have herpes, the fact is that every parasite and virus has its own resonating frequecie
Any other takes or comments to this posting? Thanks to those who have educated all of us!
We were at several parties this weekend where we had all sorts of comments about our posting. MANY (a lot that were new and some that have been in the lifestyle for years) agreed with our stance on things, and it surprised us to see how many that had the fears that we commented about, as well as the responses that they read.
It was asked that we keep this posting in the forefront for a bit. So help us and comment on your take on this so all can learn as they read the comments and posting.
It was asked that we keep this posting in the forefront for a bit. So help us and comment on your take on this so all can learn as they read the comments and posting.
The people we have met have lied about everything else, why should we believe them about std's? Its all a crap shoot. Not a single person ever asked us. We do however ask them. But who knows if its the truth?
one other point that some may not of thaught of depending on the STD it may be a criminal offence (ie if you have hiv or aids and knowingly have sexual contact with others ) knowingly transmiting aids is concidered premeditated murder ( unless thay changed it since i last checked ) but none the less if you have something take care of it asap or get outa the lifestyle so those of us that are responsible can enjoy our selves
Mrs. Evil here......
before undressing several of the male gender (oh wait....females also....LOL!) on the dance floor at Habits this weekend, I DID have them sign and notarize full disclosure forms stating that I would not run into anything icky.......Copies of this form can be found at www.sexformsforswingers.......... ;-)
Seriously though, many of the remarks on this topic are worth reviewing again. Preventive measures should always be taken, but also being tested on a regular basis seems prudent for this lifestyle.
before undressing several of the male gender (oh wait....females also....LOL!) on the dance floor at Habits this weekend, I DID have them sign and notarize full disclosure forms stating that I would not run into anything icky.......Copies of this form can be found at www.sexformsforswingers.......... ;-)
Seriously though, many of the remarks on this topic are worth reviewing again. Preventive measures should always be taken, but also being tested on a regular basis seems prudent for this lifestyle.
we feel that if people took the initiative, went to the dr and got tested for the herpes virus it would be a safer invironment to play in. take a chance...get tested.
PITMOMMY,
Sorry to derail the thread here, but I just need to put this information out there regarding 'radionics' aka 'frequency generators'.
---------------------------
Taken from www.quackwatch.org
http://www.quackwatch.org/04ConsumerEducation/News/rife.html
Radionics is a pseudoscience based on the notion that diseases can be diagnosed and treated by tuning in on radio-like frequencies allegedly emitted by disease-causing agents and diseased organs. The theory behind it originated with Albert Abrams, M.D. (1864-1924), who developed thirteen devices claimed to detect such frequencies and/or cure people by matching their frequencies. Abrams made millions leasing his devices and was considered by the American Medical Association to be the "dean of gadget quacks." He claimed:
* All parts of the body emit electrical impulses with different frequencies that vary with health and disease.
* Illnesses -- as well as age, sex, religion, and location -- could be diagnosed by "tuning in" on patient's blood or handwriting samples with one of his devices.
* Diseases could be treated by feeding proper vibrations into the body with another of his devices.
During the 1950s, an FDA investigation showed that some of Abrams's devices produced magnetism from circuits like that of an electric doorbell, whereas others had short-wave circuits resembling those of a taxicab transmitter [3]. Similar devices have been produced by many others and are still marketed today.
One of Abrams's many imitators was Royal Raymond Rife (1888-1971), an American who claimed that cancer was caused by bacteria. During the 1920s, he claimed to have developed a powerful microscope that could detect living microbes by the color of auras emitted by their vibratory rates. His Rife Frequency Generator allegedly generates radio waves with precisely the same frequency, causing the offending bacteria to shatter in the same manner as a crystal glass breaks in response to the voice of an opera singer. The American Cancer Society has pointed out that although sound waves can produce vibrations that break glass, radio waves at the power level emitted a Rife generator do not have sufficient energy to destroy bacteria [4].
[snip]
The bottom line, however, is that radionics devices have no value for diagnosing or treating anything.
--------------------------------------
I just want everyone to have all the pertinent information before they decide to put their money or faith into something like that.
Sorry to derail the thread here, but I just need to put this information out there regarding 'radionics' aka 'frequency generators'.
---------------------------
Taken from www.quackwatch.org
http://www.quackwatch.org/04ConsumerEducation/News/rife.html
Radionics is a pseudoscience based on the notion that diseases can be diagnosed and treated by tuning in on radio-like frequencies allegedly emitted by disease-causing agents and diseased organs. The theory behind it originated with Albert Abrams, M.D. (1864-1924), who developed thirteen devices claimed to detect such frequencies and/or cure people by matching their frequencies. Abrams made millions leasing his devices and was considered by the American Medical Association to be the "dean of gadget quacks." He claimed:
* All parts of the body emit electrical impulses with different frequencies that vary with health and disease.
* Illnesses -- as well as age, sex, religion, and location -- could be diagnosed by "tuning in" on patient's blood or handwriting samples with one of his devices.
* Diseases could be treated by feeding proper vibrations into the body with another of his devices.
During the 1950s, an FDA investigation showed that some of Abrams's devices produced magnetism from circuits like that of an electric doorbell, whereas others had short-wave circuits resembling those of a taxicab transmitter [3]. Similar devices have been produced by many others and are still marketed today.
One of Abrams's many imitators was Royal Raymond Rife (1888-1971), an American who claimed that cancer was caused by bacteria. During the 1920s, he claimed to have developed a powerful microscope that could detect living microbes by the color of auras emitted by their vibratory rates. His Rife Frequency Generator allegedly generates radio waves with precisely the same frequency, causing the offending bacteria to shatter in the same manner as a crystal glass breaks in response to the voice of an opera singer. The American Cancer Society has pointed out that although sound waves can produce vibrations that break glass, radio waves at the power level emitted a Rife generator do not have sufficient energy to destroy bacteria [4].
[snip]
The bottom line, however, is that radionics devices have no value for diagnosing or treating anything.
--------------------------------------
I just want everyone to have all the pertinent information before they decide to put their money or faith into something like that.
Tuning into a radio frequency to cure diseases....WOW, what will ppl think of next. Trust me I am not disrespecting any Dr...whoever, and any members whose belief is that this works......I just find it a little bizzare. STD's are rapidly growing every year, and frightfully getting more and more dangerous. All this has made us rethink just how much fun we should or wanna have. It isnt worth the worry and wonder. There are to many other worries to fill our minds and lives with then to sit and worry when in a trusting, loving and secure marriage that we might be putting our lives in danger of getting any STD life threatning or not. I know I dont want that worry too, I have to many other things to worry about. I guess you all gotta do what makes you fill comfy, and for us that is staying exclusive with only a few friends. Even that isnt a for sure deal, but we do trust those we "play" with very very much......so hopefully that will keep us safe. Thanks for making us think.....I guess when you are an honest person, and you trust that others are too....things like this make you think twice that not everyone is as trustworthy as you want them to be. It baffles me that ppl would not be honest and up front about serious diseases like that and just knowingly give that to someone innocent......RIDICULOUS!!!!!
"Love is only fleeting but herpes lasts forever..." (Advice from my cousin on my 16th birthday)
I thought, as someone who isn
I thought, as someone who isn
Yes we think you should be tested we are D/D free and hope to stay that way we only do the condom thing and if you know you have a disease why would you not let someone know???:@ . So be safe play safe but play................
yup, play the odds
practice safe sex and get tested!
practice safe sex and get tested!
that quak files is a bunch of shit, whoever is writing that bs doesnt have your best interest at heart, probably someone from our friend the fda, who wants you on valtrex the rest of your life,
Dont think anyone was tryen to be disrespectful to opinions.....PITMOMMA, but rather just inform others of how they see it...their is nothing wrong with that. If you feel this Radio stuff works, then great, others may feel that taking Valtrex their whole lives works for them. It is a matter of opinion, and everyone has them. Dont take offense to it, or take away from the subject at hand, which is protecting ourselves from STD's. ....and practicing safe sex, and how to handle that in the LIFESTYLE we our all living......if you have info on this radio stuff, then put some more info out there for us to read about it. Everyone likes to be informed.....about new things to try or to not try. just my .02
I find it most interesting that no one has brought up the fact that most people who transmit an STD don't even know that they have one. Being tested is no guarantee that you are D&D...(the drug part is a thing that you reallly do know about).. Tests for HIV may be reliable but there is a time lag between testing and the antibodies being present. For example, if you were to have sex with an infected person on Saturday or Friday or even Wednesday of week 1 and you are tested on Tuesday of week 2 you will probably test negative by several tests out there that are in common use. The DNA test, very expensive, as I am told, will be effective only after 7 to 12 days so that the body will produce the marker that the test picks up on. So, by the end of week 2 you have a clean bill of health and you inadvertantly infect someone else. Take a look at pics and profiles and when they say safe sex and there is someone there with an unsheathed penis who is not the mate of the person in the profile, you know that that is a potential case of something that you don't want.
Bottom line about being safe is that you are only as safe as your last partner and their last partner..... Play without a glove and and you may wish you hadn't.... and so may your next partner. If you know that your partners are safe and you are safe stay safe...... We don't want to call this anything but a "LIFESTYLE" . Key word is LIFE.
That's my dollar three eighty seven.... $0.02 oesn't get it in the 21st century.
Bottom line about being safe is that you are only as safe as your last partner and their last partner..... Play without a glove and and you may wish you hadn't.... and so may your next partner. If you know that your partners are safe and you are safe stay safe...... We don't want to call this anything but a "LIFESTYLE" . Key word is LIFE.
That's my dollar three eighty seven.... $0.02 oesn't get it in the 21st century.