Swingers Forum - Swinging after menopause?

Hi Canvas - I can speak to that a little - One, because I'm in the healthcare industry and Two - because we've been through it. The loss of libido is real for BOTH men AND women. Testosterone pellets or shots will make a huge difference when needed. Adults > 40 ought to check their testosterone levels at least annually. If you notice a loss of libido - that ought to be the first thing you look at. Most women do lose a little or all lubrication - Testosterone pellets can help with that - but there is absolutely no shame in bringing your lube with you. There have been several great forum discussions about which lubes are best . . . and frankly, they can add a lot to the sexual experience. Hot flashes are another thing - those too can be easily mitigated in most cases with testosterone or hormone replacement. In our own experience . . . T-shots/pellets completely restored any libido issues. We are both rearing to go every day so menopause doesn't need to impede sexuality at all . . . it CAN enhance it. Hope it helps - great forum topic. YMMV

Thanks, you two. I believe the bigger challenge with menopause for my wife has been the hot flashes, sleep disturbances, anxiety, etc. It seems to have wrecked havoc on her thyroid levels which causes a host of other symptoms...and it's been difficult getting them right and then to stay right for long (thyroid disorder). They have been bouncing up and down since late last summer. As a result, it has caused me to look more closely at just how much menopause seems to effect different women differently, ie...some losing their libido only to gain it back, some losing most indefinitely, while others say their libidos get stronger. I've heard some women say they cruised right through menopause with barely a symptom. Others seem miserable.

Women are amazing...but, as simple as it is to have a penis in comparison, I'm glad to be a man at this age. Much respect to women!

1DIVA wrote:

SweettAndH wrote:

I had only one hot flash. Nothing else changed. (Ignore the silver hair.)

Wow! That's awesome!

DELICIOUSLYWET wrote:

Aging happens. It’s not the end of the world, until it is!
Mrs. Delicious went through peri-menopause and is still moving through menopause. Menopause is actually not an event, but an ongoing process that for some women takes literally, a few years. It is not always a pleasant process. Estrogen treatment and testosterone seem to elevate some women’s blood pressure. Even the bioidenticals can have that effect. Lady Delicious seems to respond well to the precursors, like flax seed oil. it isn’t always easy. Yes, sex is still happens, and yes it’s still great, and yes your hot wife’s day in day out baseline desires may drop off. If she has been a bit of a nymphomaniac, she might cool off just enough, that she might be less likely to surprise you as to how far she’ll go in the heat of the moment during an adventure. You may not decide to nickname her prudence, but she may be less likely to throw caution to the wind. On an intellectual level, that’s good, but on a hormonal level, she will probably miss walking right next to, and sometimes crossing over the line between control and total surrender to unbridle desire. Our experience is that Lady Delicious, still gets wet and excited, and is still more randy and ready, kinky and orgasmic, than a lot of women. The baseline for sexual desire obviously is quite a bit higher in the lifestyle community. American women, far too often tie their social value to youth and appearance. My wife was used to showing up at a meet and greet, or a small gathering, a play date, whatever, and find herself landing somewhere near the fulcrum of the sexual storm. We stopped going to events a while back, because they usually did not agree with our schedule. Now that we are making it to a few I’m finding that she feels like her value in the community has diminished, because she is older, looks more mature, and she no longer has so much potential to go off the rails in desire. I don’t know. Maybe it’s harder for a lady to just be part of the crowd, or to become more the observer than the observed. Self-expectations, are harder to say no to, than expectations from others. As for myself, I’ll be 65 in May. I still really don’t need Viagra. I still wake up every morning with morning wood. I’m no longer always a ten minute recovery lover. Sometimes, but not always. Sex, was pretty much, kind of the default thought train, that would capture my mind, if left unoccupied, and always knocking on the door, becoming somewhat distracting, whilst trying to do other task and accomplishments; now it is not quite as demanding a constant companion. It is still always there. I’m nursing a hip with no remaining cartilage. Turns out I actually have dysplasia, where my femoral heads are too large for my hip sockets, or the other way around, depending on how you see it. So, I’ll be getting my right hip replaced sometime after elective surgeries are once again available. The left hip still has some cartilage so I can wait a bit on that. Hip replacements feel like old guy stuff. Being a glass half full kind of guy, maybe I will be able to stuff a basketball again, after the replacements. I used to occasionally podium in middle distance runs around town, even in my fifties. Maybe I can revisit that and win some medals in my age group.
We always thought that eventually we would probably kind of drift back into a near monogamous sex life as we got older. We have always remained each other’s favorite lovers. We are in fact sort of in that drift, but still interested in the lifestyle adventure.

Great stuff. Thanks!

We would suggest you look into hormone replacement therapy. We both use bioidentical hormone replacements along with other supplements and it’s amazing. Both men and women should start looking at this in their 40’s.

2Gemini wrote:

We would suggest you look into hormone replacement therapy. We both use bioidentical hormone replacements along with other supplements and it’s amazing. Both men and women should start looking at this in their 40’s.

Thanks. Hearing all the positive reports, we have talked about this. The potential long term risks made us uneasy though.

Bio identical hormones is the only way to go.

Nakkidfun wrote:

My wife had a DVT years ago so they won’t give her any hormones. Would Bio identical hormones be any different?

She should check with a gynecologist who treats with bioidentical to see if there is any interaction with anything she might be taking for DVT. The bioidentical is usually just using with a compounding pharmacy and the natural ingredients are derived from horse or bovine animals. They are hormones just not synthetically made.