Do people really want to know? Are/were you grateful for any direct feedback that helped you in the long run? Some struggle for us here. We consider ourselves very direct, and yet some we elected to ghost. Of course it’s not our job to ‘fix’ any person or couple, but ghosting feels a tad cowardly.
Any tips that work for you?
Any tips that work for you?
We have been and are very direct and will respond with polite “no” or “not interested” responses. Some are appreciative and say Thank you for at least responding. We have had quite a few that take it as a personal attack and respond extremely negatively. Some people are fearful of those repercussions therefore, they just don’t respond. If everyone would just respond with a polite Thank you and good luck in your search there might be better and more direct dialogue.
Honestly I don’t fill like it matters how others respond as long as you and your partner are on the same page with the things your looking for. Honesty is always the best policy but some don’t like rejection. Just because there is some chat or a little flirting dosent mean shit! If there isn’t a connection or you see it’s not going anywhere it’s time to move on.
Sometimes it's a very fine line between constructive feedback and what can feel like an insult or an attack. Different personality types will take things differently depending on their past experiences. And, ANY kind of text-based communication lacks voice inflection and tone, body language, and other cues that humans rely on for context. Emojis can help a little bit to convey intent but even they don't help entirely. It's EXTREMELY easy to be misunderstood and misconstrued in the internet age. Ask me how I know. LOL
While a polite “no thanks” is fine, there is no perfect means. We have done both. Ghosting (and blocking) usually when someone just doesn’t read our profile and is in appropriate or not what we are looking for. But when a sincere message comes in and the person(s) is just not for us, we try and respond.
We like to receive and give direct feedback. If it is just a reach out to us and we’re not interested, a simple request like “hey, like your profile” a simple “thanks for reaching out. In looking at your profile we don’t see a good fit. Good luck!” Is what we do & we would like to receive back if we reach out.
It’s a different story if we have met for drinks or even played with the couple. Even then, we provide feedback - we’d rather let the couple know vs ghost them and wonder what happened. We don’t go into super specific, just a “didn’t click with us”, play style didn’t match up with our play style or similar.
Bottom line, we’d rather know than not know. But then again, I’m very direct 😎
It’s a different story if we have met for drinks or even played with the couple. Even then, we provide feedback - we’d rather let the couple know vs ghost them and wonder what happened. We don’t go into super specific, just a “didn’t click with us”, play style didn’t match up with our play style or similar.
Bottom line, we’d rather know than not know. But then again, I’m very direct 😎
EVILDOERS wrote:
Sometimes it's a very fine line between constructive feedback and what can feel like an insult or an attack. Different personality types will take things differently depending on their past experiences. And, ANY kind of text-based communication lacks voice inflection and tone, body language, and other cues that humans rely on for context. Emojis can help a little bit to convey intent but even they don't help entirely. It's EXTREMELY easy to be misunderstood and misconstrued in the internet age. Ask me how I know. LOL
Agreed .. and If we reply with this emoji 🤤 you can assume we’re interested lol
We don't really need constructive (or otherwise) feed back. But a quick "no thanks" is appreciated. But not a fan of ghosting in general. Specifically, if you initially contacted us and we positively respond then you just never get back us... Pretty tacky IMO.
Any response should be commensurate with the effort put forth. Profiles with lots of N/A, little or repetitive narrative, blind friend requests, copied and pasted messages, dated photos, one photo, etc. get what they get. We could provide advice all day long around here encouraging people to put their best foot forward, but that's not our place.
On the other hand, if someone put their best foot forward when contacting you or solicited feedback, then yes, ghosting them is cowardly. If they specifically asked for feedback, then take it at face value and as a compliment. Apparently they sense you have some experience in all this and can help them. We all know this LS thing can be difficult to navigate, so be the sexy fun friendly people they think you are and mentor them a little bit. If they misunderstand you, then just graciously decline. How hard is that really?
On the other hand, if someone put their best foot forward when contacting you or solicited feedback, then yes, ghosting them is cowardly. If they specifically asked for feedback, then take it at face value and as a compliment. Apparently they sense you have some experience in all this and can help them. We all know this LS thing can be difficult to navigate, so be the sexy fun friendly people they think you are and mentor them a little bit. If they misunderstand you, then just graciously decline. How hard is that really?
lebonnevie wrote:
Do people really want to know? Are/were you grateful for any direct feedback that helped you in the long run? Some struggle for us here. We consider ourselves very direct, and yet some we elected to ghost. Of course it’s not our job to ‘fix’ any person or couple, but ghosting feels a tad cowardly.
Any tips that work for you?
We will ask for direct feed back if communication stops or the other couple wish to no longer chat or meet. We are actually relieved if they advise there just was not a physical connection. If we do something through communication or our actions, that’s something we want to know so we can address it.
Yay for couples who are secure enough to give and receive constructive criticism 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
I say no often and if someone pushes for an answer I always answer back with fuck off lol
I sure hope it’s not us that you are considering ghosting!!
🤣
🤣
wanderlust14 wrote:
I sure hope it’s not us that you are considering ghosting!!
🤣
No it’s just single men
wanderlust14 wrote:
I sure hope it’s not us that you are considering ghosting!!
🤣
New phone who dis?
😉
It was us 😀!
wanderlust14 wrote:
I sure hope it’s not us that you are considering ghosting!!
🤣
Same on who ever would ghost such a hot couple