So neither of us have typical D/s tendencies or personalities but kind of want to just try out some very light D/s without the whips and chains and ball gags and such.
Has anyone successfully done that despite the fact that the Dom doesn't really have a dominating demeanor and the sub isn't really submissive in any way? Or are we kidding ourselves and should just stick to more vanilla-ish sex? LOL
TIA for any help, hints, pointers or even just opinions.
The 'Doers.
Has anyone successfully done that despite the fact that the Dom doesn't really have a dominating demeanor and the sub isn't really submissive in any way? Or are we kidding ourselves and should just stick to more vanilla-ish sex? LOL
TIA for any help, hints, pointers or even just opinions.
The 'Doers.
EVILDOERS wrote:
So neither of us have typical D/s tendencies or personalities but kind of want to just try out some very light D/s without the whips and chains and ball gags and such.
Has anyone successfully done that despite the fact that the Dom doesn't really have a dominating demeanor and the sub isn't really submissive in any way? Or are we kidding ourselves and should just stick to more vanilla-ish sex? LOL
TIA for any help, hints, pointers or even just opinions.
The 'Doers.
Maybe the dom can bark out a demeaning order to the sub, quickly following it with a long winded apology leading into make up sex.
DELICIOUSLYWET wrote:EVILDOERS wrote:
So neither of us have typical D/s tendencies or personalities but kind of want to just try out some very light D/s without the whips and chains and ball gags and such.
Has anyone successfully done that despite the fact that the Dom doesn't really have a dominating demeanor and the sub isn't really submissive in any way? Or are we kidding ourselves and should just stick to more vanilla-ish sex? LOL
TIA for any help, hints, pointers or even just opinions.
The 'Doers.
Maybe the dom can bark out a demeaning order to the sub, quickly following it with a long winded apology leading into make up sex.
KINKY! I would only add something along the lines of the sub telling the Dom how disappointed their mother and/or bishop would be if they knew what he'd ordered the sub to do. I think that would be a quick easy way to reverse the power dynamic (I have no idea if that's the correct terminology in D/s lingo.)
We are the same, not really Doms or subs. But we did go to a party where I discovered I enjoyed the flogging but not taking orders to be submissive.
Create a profile on Fetlife and attend some munches, then visits to one of the three or more dungeons in SLC. Go to burnin* man attend classes at retrofrolic. Draft up a contract. We have taugh what your asking and have held into parties at our house for soft core BDSM. They are great as you can sit back and watch see where your boundaries need to be.
Create a profile on Fetlife and attend some munches, then visits to one of the three or more dungeons in SLC. Go to burnin* man attend classes at retrofrolic. Draft up a contract. We have taugh what your asking and have held into parties at our house for soft core BDSM. They are great as you can sit back and watch see where your boundaries need to be.
We started with light choking and spanking after a lot of work up have slowly worked into collar on date nights and light play that way. True D/S is about trust deep love not wild crazy pain stuff.
I have a hard time seeing how that would work. I’m very dominant in life but a sub in bed, I think it would be just as difficult to be submissive or dominant in bed if it’s not in your nature. It would be like me changing my dominant behavior at work for something that doesn’t come naturally. Interesting question. Thanks for bringing it up!
D/s doesn't mean pain and bondage. It's about power exchange.
It can be little things - setting a small task, with a sensual or sexual reward.
A tease, and denial, until they are begging for release or access to your body.
It can be as simple as having them remove their panties in an alley, or making them do a sensual chore before they get their pleasure.
Watch The Secretary for some interesting ideas.
It can be little things - setting a small task, with a sensual or sexual reward.
A tease, and denial, until they are begging for release or access to your body.
It can be as simple as having them remove their panties in an alley, or making them do a sensual chore before they get their pleasure.
Watch The Secretary for some interesting ideas.
VITAEEROTIC wrote:
D/s doesn't mean pain and bondage. It's about power exchange.
It can be little things - setting a small task, with a sensual or sexual reward.
A tease, and denial, until they are begging for release or access to your body.
It can be as simple as having them remove their panties in an alley, or making them do a sensual chore before they get their pleasure.
Watch The Secretary for some interesting ideas.
Ms. Evil doesn't like earthworms or red markers, and won't sit at her desk until she just can't hold her urine anymore.
But we appreciate the feedback. Maybe some group will, I dunno, like, host an 'Intro To Kink' party someday for newbies or just those who are kind of curious about it. 
ps- Sat. was awesome BTW!
Sign up for a fetlife account. Go to a munch, if you're really interested then you'll need a sponsor. There are some great groups like the: menagerie, Flog or a lot of groups associated with the path. A lot of swingers usually don't stay.
Our first N.U.K.E event at Vice Mansion was a Kink and Fetish ball. Intro to all kinds of things.
We'll likely have the 2nd Annual Fall Fetish Ball in the next few months. There's also classes and gatherings where people talk about various aspects of kink and D/s in the SL valley.
We'll likely have the 2nd Annual Fall Fetish Ball in the next few months. There's also classes and gatherings where people talk about various aspects of kink and D/s in the SL valley.
Like many activities for the sexually adventurous, it’s worth a try as you may find you like it, want more and variety if the spice of life.
For me (lili), half the fun was dressing the part. I also liked playing around with the feeling of being in control or giving it up.
For me (lili), half the fun was dressing the part. I also liked playing around with the feeling of being in control or giving it up.
Being a truly dom needs practise. Fetlife is an excellent forum
Being a dom, check fitnessmature in Fetlife. I think BDSM is fantastic and rewarding
Love sensory deprivation, whipping. slapping, kneeling, anal hooks, ruined orgasms, orgasm torture, watersports. etc
Athleticeuropean wrote:
Love sensory deprivation, whipping. slapping, kneeling, anal hooks, ruined orgasms, orgasm torture, watersports. etc
Yeah, most of that is WAY above our pay grade and far more than we want to even consider at this point (or probably ever!). That is some graduate-level BDSM shit right there and we're more at the level of a night school introductory class at the local high school. We'll check out a few remedial reading comprehension courses for a few of you when we register for our "D/s for Softies" class.
Thanks for your reply, if one day both of you want to try let me know. Loves to experience/experiment bdsm with couples. Bondage is a beautiful journey
Love to continue talking to both of you. Have a great weekend
CONCHOBAR wrote:
Like many activities for the sexually adventurous, it’s worth a try as you may find you like it, want more and variety if the spice of life.
For me (lili), half the fun was dressing the part. I also liked playing around with the feeling of being in control or giving it up.
Hmmm seems to me L you can be good at both. We know T's preference...LOL
Be obedient sometimes means able to receive the whipping, flogging, slapping, throat fuck, etc without the verbal side
YAY! Swingular is barfing up old defunct threads again. I wonder why it never barfs up any of those threads complaining about lack of response when people are having site issues?
really what it comes down to in your situation is a form of role playing. start with simple commands and consequences if not followed i.e. spanking cuffing denial of something. move to kneeling and verbal cues of submission like yes sir yes mistress and then figure out what you liked and expand