A friend has confided in me that she has become involved in a relationship with a couple. The couple are married, but not to each other.
My friend is having some "issues" with being involved with a married man, but not with the woman...when they are together, she is more than happy to be involved "sexually" with the woman but has qualms about doing anything with him...
I'm curious about your opinions on this situation - how is it differant to be involved with a married woman than it is to be involved with a married man...wouldn't both be considered an "affair", since niether's spouse is aware of the relationship?
My friend is having some "issues" with being involved with a married man, but not with the woman...when they are together, she is more than happy to be involved "sexually" with the woman but has qualms about doing anything with him...
I'm curious about your opinions on this situation - how is it differant to be involved with a married woman than it is to be involved with a married man...wouldn't both be considered an "affair", since niether's spouse is aware of the relationship?
YES.
Infedelity is about deception, not sex. A person who intends to commit adultry must consider the following:
(1) You must conceal your emotions.
Often times people who cheat feel that they are lacking an important component in their relationships. They have either exhausted any possibility that the issue can be worked out, or they do not have the courage to discuss the issue openly and truthfully due to (what they feel is) a less than receptive spouse.
This is where most people come to terms with their intention to cheat.
(2) You must conceal your intentions.
The cheater must exploit the trust and respect of their mate to be successful.
We also believe that the serious INTENTION to commit adultry is nearly as bad as actually going through with it.
For example: Paying for a hotel room, buying the person gifts of any kind, concealing your friendship with the person in question, and making special arrangements to spend time with that person, all usually without the knowledge of your spouse, is in our book adultry. The INTENTION is there, and usually the person or persons in question have already resolved (in their minds) that they are going to go through with it. Circumstance may prevent things from happening immediately, but two determined people will ultimately find a way to make it work.
There are no double standards when it comes to cheating. Whatever your reasons are, whatever your story, the answer should be the same.
Cheating is about deception, not sex. And that is one to grow on.
I beleive that my arguement was sufficiently intelligent enough to omit any reference to the bible, or theology as a practice. Hopefully no one else will either, lol.
Luvbugs! (mR.)
Infedelity is about deception, not sex. A person who intends to commit adultry must consider the following:
(1) You must conceal your emotions.
Often times people who cheat feel that they are lacking an important component in their relationships. They have either exhausted any possibility that the issue can be worked out, or they do not have the courage to discuss the issue openly and truthfully due to (what they feel is) a less than receptive spouse.
This is where most people come to terms with their intention to cheat.
(2) You must conceal your intentions.
The cheater must exploit the trust and respect of their mate to be successful.
We also believe that the serious INTENTION to commit adultry is nearly as bad as actually going through with it.
For example: Paying for a hotel room, buying the person gifts of any kind, concealing your friendship with the person in question, and making special arrangements to spend time with that person, all usually without the knowledge of your spouse, is in our book adultry. The INTENTION is there, and usually the person or persons in question have already resolved (in their minds) that they are going to go through with it. Circumstance may prevent things from happening immediately, but two determined people will ultimately find a way to make it work.
There are no double standards when it comes to cheating. Whatever your reasons are, whatever your story, the answer should be the same.
Cheating is about deception, not sex. And that is one to grow on.
I beleive that my arguement was sufficiently intelligent enough to omit any reference to the bible, or theology as a practice. Hopefully no one else will either, lol.
Luvbugs! (mR.)
There is no difference; their both doing the same exact thing. If both of the non-involved spouses have no clue of their extra curricular activities, then they (those involved) are both just as guilty as the next.
What
What
It is cheating and deception on ALL of the participants parts.
It is also a disgrace to the very core of what swinging is about.
It is also a disgrace to the very core of what swinging is about.