It seems that if someone takes time to write to you you should at least write back with a BI FAT NO ,, anything is better then nothing. Has anyone had this problem??and what would you do??
I agree with you...BUT you probably would not write us back...I smoke...AND we are not married...just commited...
ok here goes.... anyone who knows me knows i like to be straightforward and honest but it may not be so true when it comes to email. i'm not gonna write back to someone and tell them that they're not attractive to me or they're too fat or whatever. even if you write just a "no" they're still left wondering what was wrong. it's less hurtful if you don't answer and let them think you're rude. sorry
Maybe the poeple you are emailing are either really busy or just dont take the time to answer unless they want to talk. There are people out there that will just not answer rather than say no, so as to not hurt someone's feelings.
We try to respond to every email - not the someone likes you message - an actual email. Sometimes though one will get overlooked, usually because we assume the other has already responded, but it's not intentional. We have stated in our profile that we will not just respond and add someone just because they added us - it takes an actual email or chatting with us. If we feel like we don't click we'll let people know.
Mrs.
We try to respond to every email - not the someone likes you message - an actual email. Sometimes though one will get overlooked, usually because we assume the other has already responded, but it's not intentional. We have stated in our profile that we will not just respond and add someone just because they added us - it takes an actual email or chatting with us. If we feel like we don't click we'll let people know.
Mrs.
regarless of the reason everyone still deserves an answer
Thanks "CPLTOPARTYWITH" for your posting to this question. We now realize why we have not received any responses back from our nice messages to you two, LOL
Have a great day and look forward to saying Hi at the next party or get together.
Have a great day and look forward to saying Hi at the next party or get together.
We do our best to respond to all e-mails regardless of content. We figure if someone is willing to take the time to write us, then we owe it to them to respond. It's only polite.
Well...here's our take on this issue: It seems that this electronic form of communication has bred a different set of "courtesies" than what traditional forms of communication would call for.
In our experience, we find that many people do not feel that it is necessary to respond if they're not interested
In our experience, we find that many people do not feel that it is necessary to respond if they're not interested
If someone writes, even if you have said no single males or what ever, it takes less then a 60 seconds to say thanks but no thanks.
R & J
R & J
and maybe some of us get alot more email than others and its difficult to keep up, and maybe because there are so many phonies out there that sometimes we just get fed up
Ok I say ALL E-mails need to be answered !!!!!
I nice no thanks is fine and if they come back with a rude remark or think that you think you are to good for them then I think they have a problem andyou were right to pass them by BUT I still say that
All should be replyed to they took the time to write to you !
I nice no thanks is fine and if they come back with a rude remark or think that you think you are to good for them then I think they have a problem andyou were right to pass them by BUT I still say that
All should be replyed to they took the time to write to you !
We try to answer all emails. We don't tell folks we think they are too fat, old, young, or whatever. We just say we don't think they are what we are looking for.
I agree that it is nice to at least get a quick note of "not interested" instead of nothing at all. I know that even with the few I get, I will take the time to say something at least. It is just common courtesy to do that IMO.
we much rather have no anser back ,,,then a no we are not interested ,,you smoke ur not attractive ,,we are looking for barbies or whatever ,,,when we get that kind of mail ,you feel the hurt of rejection,,,if you dont like our looks or profile please just dont reply to our mail,,
Personally we would like to receive an e-mail back at least stating something. That way we know they actually got the mail and we don't waste our time or theirs mailing them a second time. There are several ways to politely respond. We took the time to write them and we feel a response that only really takes about 30 seconds is not to much to ask. However if someone does respond with a no thank you, then you definitely cannot ask them why. Just our 2 cents worth.
There is more to a person than just how they look in photos.We have met some damn good looking people we wouldn't give the time of day to!
BillKaren3..Why on earth would people reject you as not being attractive enough??We think you are a good looking couple.
BillKaren3..Why on earth would people reject you as not being attractive enough??We think you are a good looking couple.
Not having the time is a poor excuse. All the sites we have used offer a "canned" reply that is polite and straight forward. All it it takes is a click of the mouse. Don't think I have ever received a nasty gram from a no thank you email. When we first placed ads on swinger sites years ago, most emails were answered. Now that the net is popular and used by more and more people I suspect the precentage of ads from true swingers is smaller. I does make one wonder when you answer an ad with information that describes exactly what the couple is looking fot and don't get an answer???
just wanted to thank everyone for taking the time to respond to this post, Understand that not everybody is going to click with everybody and it's ok to say no. If you get your feelings hurt by being rejected, you have no business in this lifestyle.
It would seem to us, that there is a nice way to say no thank you, without, hurting anyones feeling.
When people don't respond, thats when others think you're too good for us, we'd much rather hear the no, and move on.
For those who worry, well, why no, get a grip, move on, be happy they acknowledge you, it's not about the , whats wrong with us, or why nots, it's about human kindness, someone, sent you a letter, they took the time, it's to simple to respond, and although easier to just delete, thats another human, a person, who took the time to drop a note.
We answer all emails, no matter what or where people are from, and we always appreciate the response.
Although, there was one letter we sent, and we got a whole medical history about circumsised men, but they replied anyway.and we did not reply back.
It's always nicer, politer, to answer a letter, and maybe gain a friend, because, thats what this lifestyle is about also, friends and friends with perks.
As for looks, I can only speak for myself, we don't judge by pictures alone, because, the male of this couple pictures, 15 yrs older then he is,lol and we've been told that, it's the written words, along with the pictures, that give us interest or not.
Again, it's just too easy to reply, and close the loop.
When people don't respond, thats when others think you're too good for us, we'd much rather hear the no, and move on.
For those who worry, well, why no, get a grip, move on, be happy they acknowledge you, it's not about the , whats wrong with us, or why nots, it's about human kindness, someone, sent you a letter, they took the time, it's to simple to respond, and although easier to just delete, thats another human, a person, who took the time to drop a note.
We answer all emails, no matter what or where people are from, and we always appreciate the response.
Although, there was one letter we sent, and we got a whole medical history about circumsised men, but they replied anyway.and we did not reply back.
It's always nicer, politer, to answer a letter, and maybe gain a friend, because, thats what this lifestyle is about also, friends and friends with perks.
As for looks, I can only speak for myself, we don't judge by pictures alone, because, the male of this couple pictures, 15 yrs older then he is,lol and we've been told that, it's the written words, along with the pictures, that give us interest or not.
Again, it's just too easy to reply, and close the loop.
My two cents.... I have never felt that if someone tells me "no, thanks" that they are too good for me or anything like that. It does not hurt my feelings as attraction is a subjective thing and if it isn't present there would be no enjoyment anyway! I do think it is the sign of total rudeness and complete lack of character to not reply at all, or worse yet, to reply claiming interest and start a dialogue and then to just stop reponding altogether! Just be an adult and say you lost interest or changed your mind or whatever, because I believe you are a LOW LIFE if you just disappear to someone. If you need a reference, look up the word "manners" and see if that helps you figure it out. Have fun out there!
If you thinks it is rude to not reply to every email then you simply have not received enough
email from people who obviously did not bother to read your profile. We too have been attacked for saying no to some, as well as attacked for not replying at all. This makes us want to not deal with them anymore. Its easier to just ignore them. We are tired of the drama. Just 24 hours ago we recieved a very hateful, obscenity filled email from a guy who was upset that we had not replied to him within 24 hours. He was blocked as well as reported to admin. We don't need this crap.
email from people who obviously did not bother to read your profile. We too have been attacked for saying no to some, as well as attacked for not replying at all. This makes us want to not deal with them anymore. Its easier to just ignore them. We are tired of the drama. Just 24 hours ago we recieved a very hateful, obscenity filled email from a guy who was upset that we had not replied to him within 24 hours. He was blocked as well as reported to admin. We don't need this crap.
That's not really what I meant, I mean if someone inappropriate e-mails just because they were too lazy to read the profile or figured you may reply even if they are not what you are looking for, they should not expect a reply. I think that is common sense. I was referring to those of us that reply to profiles that match our description. There are exceptions to everything in life.
WHYS IT HARD FOR PEOPLE TO WRITE?
There are other ways of saying No with out saying NO. Like thanks for the email but right now the wifes plate is over full but will keep you in mind for when we get some room on the plate. Plus there are other simple ways. So people don't be rude answer your email.
Ahhh... Common Courtesy.
And whatever happened to it.
For those of you who always respond, A big *bravo* to you!
For those of you who think you don't have to respond for any reason, because
you don't think people "deserve" anything, you're wrong. Every single one of
us on this planet OWES common courtesy to everyone else. Whether or not
they are deserving of it. It demonstrates that you are a person of worth. It
shows that you have manners, consideration for others, and aren't just another
selfish @$$ that makes your way through the world not caring a whit about any
other person, unless they can do something for you.
We have a term for that down here in the South: Breeding.
As in, "Breeding tells"... And in most cases it does.
If you were brought up well, reared with the proper social responsibilities, then you
will respond, even if it is to say, "You know, I appreciate you taking the time to write,
but to be honest, we are just not interested at this time. Thank you."
And by the way, it took me 12 seconds to write that sentence.
Not because you deserve it, but because I owe it to you, as you are a fellow human.
And whatever happened to it.
For those of you who always respond, A big *bravo* to you!
For those of you who think you don't have to respond for any reason, because
you don't think people "deserve" anything, you're wrong. Every single one of
us on this planet OWES common courtesy to everyone else. Whether or not
they are deserving of it. It demonstrates that you are a person of worth. It
shows that you have manners, consideration for others, and aren't just another
selfish @$$ that makes your way through the world not caring a whit about any
other person, unless they can do something for you.
We have a term for that down here in the South: Breeding.
As in, "Breeding tells"... And in most cases it does.
If you were brought up well, reared with the proper social responsibilities, then you
will respond, even if it is to say, "You know, I appreciate you taking the time to write,
but to be honest, we are just not interested at this time. Thank you."
And by the way, it took me 12 seconds to write that sentence.
Not because you deserve it, but because I owe it to you, as you are a fellow human.
sorry to disagree aegis, call me ill-mannered if you'd like but I don't owe anyone anything. I do things for people because I want to do them(the things not the people,lol)not because it's the right thing to do(in someone else's opinion)or peer pressure, guilt, etc. just for the record i checked my email records, i have 96 pages of them and yes, most of them answered, many of them being ones i wasn't interested in. i also don't like being told there's no excuses, when i have many valid ones. come take a walk in my.....heels