Anyone else see the teaser last night for the story on swinging that KSL is going to run next Monday night at 10? It was very provocative to say the least and had several people with shadowed faces talking about the lifestyle (in the teaser they never actually said it was about swinging exactly) and their disbelief that something like this could actually go on in Utah. Throughout the teaser there were graphics in bold letters saying such things as "BROKEN VOWS" and "SECRET LIVES", "BROKEN PROMISES". I seriously doubt this will be in any way shape or form a positive story. Glad Rob, et.al. decided not to cooperate with them for this story!
Evil
Evil
thats too bad there aren't some real swingers involved to give a positive opinion on it. can someone out there please tape the broadcast for me, i really would like to see it.
The funny thing is, we've been around the swing scene in Utah for quite a few years and there has been a very persistent rumor for many years that Dick Nourse used to swing back in the 70's and 80's. Wouldn't it be a HOOT if someone could find evidence of that and turn it over to a competing TV station? lol
Actually EVIL, I did do an interview with them. After I declined to show up at the first interview, they showed up at my home with cameras rolling and a reporter. I was pissed when I found out about that. My neighbors were wondering why there were cameras at my house.
Luckily I wasn't available at that moment but I figured I'd rather go in and do an interview on my terms rather then have them show up unexpected like that again which looks way worse. They are supposed to blur out my face, not because I'm worried about what people think of me, but because of all the people I know, what people might think of them because they know me. I'm a pretty prominent figure in the Salt Lake Valley but those who know me know I have nothing to hide. It was probably the worst interview I've ever done, I was pretty nervous. I'm sure they'll find some way to construe everything I said. Can't wait to see how it goes.
Luckily I wasn't available at that moment but I figured I'd rather go in and do an interview on my terms rather then have them show up unexpected like that again which looks way worse. They are supposed to blur out my face, not because I'm worried about what people think of me, but because of all the people I know, what people might think of them because they know me. I'm a pretty prominent figure in the Salt Lake Valley but those who know me know I have nothing to hide. It was probably the worst interview I've ever done, I was pretty nervous. I'm sure they'll find some way to construe everything I said. Can't wait to see how it goes.
It will be interesting, to say the least, to see how KSL portraits the lifestyle and those involved. Obviously from the story-line or intro, they are going to focus on the negative aspects of it versus the real, true-felt side of the people involved.
We should inundate KSL with a number of emails and editorials on the subject and let them know just how strong the lifestyle is and exactly how we, as a community, feel; that we will not let someone from the sidelines defamate us as people. We need to show just how strong we are in our resolve and just how many open-minded people there are in this land of narrow-mindedness; a truly conservative and repressed state. Goes to show how untrue the separation of church and state is not in this state and how the church influences what we see and attempts to control what we do.
I think their email address is [email protected]
We should inundate KSL with a number of emails and editorials on the subject and let them know just how strong the lifestyle is and exactly how we, as a community, feel; that we will not let someone from the sidelines defamate us as people. We need to show just how strong we are in our resolve and just how many open-minded people there are in this land of narrow-mindedness; a truly conservative and repressed state. Goes to show how untrue the separation of church and state is not in this state and how the church influences what we see and attempts to control what we do.
I think their email address is [email protected]
Did the teaser actually say which time during the day they were going to run the story? KSL has news @ noon - 1, 4-530 pm, 6-7pm and 10-1035pm. Guess I can just record all time frames.
Rob n Jan
Rob n Jan
OOPS, sorry after re reading the original post she did say 10.
I think we will make judgements about the story after it airs and see just how slanderous it is. NO reason to get all worked up and draw more attention to it than it is already going to get. Even then.. after its over and even if it is bad... it may be a good idea to let it die a quick death and not feed it fuel. Its not fair to be misrepresented, but its the commotion and the attention they are after. I hope for everyones sake, the dont get enough to justify the time they have to pay the reporters and camera crews to do the story.
Everyone Please, Please, lets not jump to conclusions. Let
While our opinion might be a bit aggressive and defensive toward KSL and its story, perhaps I failed to mention the latter part of our opinion is based on the outcome of the story, not its story-snippet. We agree we should wait for its airing prior to passing judgment.
I am writing as a casual outside observer. Being from Upstate NY, we are not likely to see the piece at all. But there have been similar stories aired here, complete with interviews... The general climate here is much like what was described there with the conservative churchy slant, only here it just isn't hte Morman church. Hell, our area is so conservative the metro area we are near will not even allow for full-nude strip joints.
This is not the first time by any means that the lifestyle has been put on report as a subject of "news"...who believes this whole thing is something new??? People been having sex with others in all capacities since long before there were news-magazine shows on tv...or even tv for that matter...
Remember Oprah's show? She of course was not sensationalizing it like local stations would.
In the long run the program washed under the bridge. People have too short of attention spans to be too concerned anyways. I have always thought that anyone that really gets bent out of shape over such a story is either a.)way-too-far-right-conservative-christian-right-bible-thumper-cram-values-down-yer-throat neo-nazi-people-haters, or b.)secretly wondering where to find extra people to have sex with and live out their fantasies of spicing up sexless marriages, etc.
I was glad to read that as the posts went on the outrage turned into "wait and see"...the outrage may be just the thing that blows the story way out of proprotion and compromises privacy and anonymity. Letting it fall by the wayside is most likely the best approach, unless of course they really do cross legal lines or call for a violation of rights of those involved. It will be interesting to see the outcomne of the after-airing....
This is not the first time by any means that the lifestyle has been put on report as a subject of "news"...who believes this whole thing is something new??? People been having sex with others in all capacities since long before there were news-magazine shows on tv...or even tv for that matter...
Remember Oprah's show? She of course was not sensationalizing it like local stations would.
In the long run the program washed under the bridge. People have too short of attention spans to be too concerned anyways. I have always thought that anyone that really gets bent out of shape over such a story is either a.)way-too-far-right-conservative-christian-right-bible-thumper-cram-values-down-yer-throat neo-nazi-people-haters, or b.)secretly wondering where to find extra people to have sex with and live out their fantasies of spicing up sexless marriages, etc.
I was glad to read that as the posts went on the outrage turned into "wait and see"...the outrage may be just the thing that blows the story way out of proprotion and compromises privacy and anonymity. Letting it fall by the wayside is most likely the best approach, unless of course they really do cross legal lines or call for a violation of rights of those involved. It will be interesting to see the outcomne of the after-airing....
for those of you out of the area. I don't know how much information you will be able to get, but here is the link to the local ksl.
http://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=30
I just looked real quick and didnt see anything as of yet. But you know after it airs there will be at least a small section, if not the enitre broadcast. Anyways, I to am interested to see what they have to say and thought this link might help those of you farther out that wanted to see it as well.
B & J
http://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=30
I just looked real quick and didnt see anything as of yet. But you know after it airs there will be at least a small section, if not the enitre broadcast. Anyways, I to am interested to see what they have to say and thought this link might help those of you farther out that wanted to see it as well.
B & J
I think Rob did the right thing by doing the interview and for any others that agreed then props to you also. I have some experience with new interviews as many of you that know me are aware. I can tell you from experience that what will be shown will not be what Rob expects or even what the reporters
We totally agree with mogar. Anyone believing that ksl with put a "positive" spin on this, im afraid, is wishful thinking. We just want it to be over with so we can move on to better things.
If the story is anything like the teaser...... boring!!!! Maybe we should put something together for KSL that will really spark some interest and get a few more hotties to play with.
DVR set to record this and I will try my best to get all the extra news stuff chopped out and send it to rob so that if anyone misses it they can see for themselves.
What day is it going to show? I know the 10 news but what day?
The teaser says "broken lives, broken vows" and I heard a different teaser that said something about people being recruited into this "secret lifestyle." I don't think we need to wait to hear how this story is going to spin. WARNING: WE BETTER STOP RECRUITING OUR CUTE NEIGHBORS INTO THIS TAWDRY LIFESTYLE AGAINST THEIR WILL!! Ha ha.
We heard the same teaser.. we want to know what benefits you get for being recruited... any health benefits or college funds? By the way.. where is the local swinger recruiting station?
Its not listed in the phone book.
Its not listed in the phone book.
There is supposed to be a new recruiting poster - slogan - sister swingers want you!
Here is an image from the KSL website this afternoon.
how do I find a recruiter's office? I'd like to volunteer some time there.
how do I find a recruiter's office? I'd like to volunteer some time there.
Here's the full page that it was on at ksl.com
look at the irony of the advertisment on the right side
look at the irony of the advertisment on the right side
i think it is kinda kewl that they are doing this thing on tv-can you only imagine now that everyone watching the news will now be members of swingular cause it is really fun and excieting! they are all gonna know how to have adult fun now!!!! lmao!!!
Just something funny I noticed on the above screen capture....
Does it say: SWAP & SALE for the ad on the right??
LOL, kinda funny.
EDIT: Just noticed you mentioned that in your post, lol.
Does it say: SWAP & SALE for the ad on the right??
LOL, kinda funny.
EDIT: Just noticed you mentioned that in your post, lol.
What is the link to that page, I wish to read it....
http://www.ksl.com/?sid=247722&nid=303
GREAT!!!! On the radio, it just mentioned Bike and Wife Swap tonight at 10
Amy and I were on the way to work this morning and heard the same thing and we looked at each other like we KNEW what we heard, but we couldn't be hearing it...
Bike and Wife Swap...
Anyone want to swap for my wife? She's got low miles and is a LOT of fun to ride!
I kid... I kid...
Well, not really...
Bike and Wife Swap...
Anyone want to swap for my wife? She's got low miles and is a LOT of fun to ride!
I kid... I kid...
Well, not really...
YAY!
I'm actually excited to see this "expose"...I find it quite funny that there is so much hype surrounding it, actually. Does anyone really pay that much attention to the news anyway?
I sincerly doubt that I will go to work tomorrow and hear someone say "Dude, did you see that story about Swingers last night?"
Hey Recon - how come we haven't swapped bikes yet? My BMX for your Harley...
A&K
I'm actually excited to see this "expose"...I find it quite funny that there is so much hype surrounding it, actually. Does anyone really pay that much attention to the news anyway?
I sincerly doubt that I will go to work tomorrow and hear someone say "Dude, did you see that story about Swingers last night?"
Hey Recon - how come we haven't swapped bikes yet? My BMX for your Harley...
A&K
You will notice on their web site that there is an place were viewers post comments on news stories. It will be real interesting on how many people comment on this. I saw just today there were almost 40 comments alone on the story about Provo High locking out kids that are late for school. This will be interesting to read as I am sure the general LDS groups will be posting how ugly this is and wrong, which they will be doing on the same computer that their husbands surf for porn on all night long.
I would suggest that those that can post positive experiances about the lifestyle and how in most cases it helps a marrage not hurts it. I can prove data were the divorce rate is 50% or more in the USA but in the lifestyle it is less the 5%. Couples that play together stay together. Hell, most people have the urge to cheat on their spouse, it is just our nature. Why cheat when you can both be together, get what you need and have a great marrage at the same time.??
I am sure this story will put a lot of thoughts into some peoples minds, they are going to spark more interest in the lifestyle then hurt any of us. Does anyone think they will quit the lifestyle become of this story tonight? I am guessing that there will be at least a few couples while watching the new tonight in bed together that will talk about the story, express interest, how it would turn them on, then they will have great sex, get on the internet and be at one of the next parties.
Rob, keep us informed if you see a big spike in hits on your site tomorrow. Also, again if anyone can post positive stories on KSL web site tomorrow please do so. You can do this without anyone knowing who you are.
I would suggest that those that can post positive experiances about the lifestyle and how in most cases it helps a marrage not hurts it. I can prove data were the divorce rate is 50% or more in the USA but in the lifestyle it is less the 5%. Couples that play together stay together. Hell, most people have the urge to cheat on their spouse, it is just our nature. Why cheat when you can both be together, get what you need and have a great marrage at the same time.??
I am sure this story will put a lot of thoughts into some peoples minds, they are going to spark more interest in the lifestyle then hurt any of us. Does anyone think they will quit the lifestyle become of this story tonight? I am guessing that there will be at least a few couples while watching the new tonight in bed together that will talk about the story, express interest, how it would turn them on, then they will have great sex, get on the internet and be at one of the next parties.
Rob, keep us informed if you see a big spike in hits on your site tomorrow. Also, again if anyone can post positive stories on KSL web site tomorrow please do so. You can do this without anyone knowing who you are.
How ironic it is that we are being judged by people who follow religious leaders that preach plural marriages, marrying children, having sex with them and believe it is okay to murder to get the things you want. I'll check into the station's site for comments. Should be an interesting news clip. And thanks Rob for at lease trying to tell them all the possitive things our lifestyle provides.
Well I guess we will all find out tonight what will be said and how much is true. We was waching a little today and yeah some of the stuff that we saw just to get you to wach IS a bunch of BULL, So we are staying up past our bed time to wach it. What are they going to say they dont know anything about what really goes on and they way they put it as if we are going out NOT as a couple but as sigles looking to get some and I bet they dont know about some of the friends you make but I guess we will see tonight at 10
Just finished watching that bullshit on KSL, guess it would have been to much to ask for an unbiased story on swinging. It was completely negative. I would like to see them run a story on other "alternative" lifestyles and watch the activist groups sue them into bankruptcy. We are not harming anyone but they talked like we were carriers of the plague or something. Thats about all I have to say anything else and It will not be this nice.
Interesting enough in PROVO where we live we only got to see half the story. Our I-Provo Cable went out in the midst of it and came back on about 8 minutes later. HUMMMMM - Interesting. Anyone have a tape we can watch of it. Maybe we can invite our neighbors in the WARD to cum to a house party to watch, meet and greet, LOL
The smartest move everyone can make now is to NOT write KSL and complain..... The more attention they get from this the more they will sensationalize it and the worse it will get..
Silence is golden........ Let it drop.
Silence is golden........ Let it drop.
Anybody know of any nice houses for sale in Draper? ;-)
Evil
Evil
YOWSER!
okay rob, i get a free beer next time i see ya when we go to the next party. yes, swingers that was me getting a beer at the bar in the ksl report! not even a michelob a bud light ( they were out upstairs). sheeesh, move to utah and get on ksl thru a swinger story, the american dream baby!.........damn it rob, now we will never get a seat at the parties with all the mormons coming to check'em out! LOL :*
okay rob, i get a free beer next time i see ya when we go to the next party. yes, swingers that was me getting a beer at the bar in the ksl report! not even a michelob a bud light ( they were out upstairs). sheeesh, move to utah and get on ksl thru a swinger story, the american dream baby!.........damn it rob, now we will never get a seat at the parties with all the mormons coming to check'em out! LOL :*
I really enjoyed the "hidden camera" they took into Club 90...and the blurred out "Spice" party invitation. Or the really corny handfull of wedding rings being dropped...classy images there KSL.
They're never going to try to get an unbiased side of the story. This is Utah and the news plays to those that pay the bills...IE the church. Piss off the church, lose your license, your station or whatever.
Face it folks, we live "Behind the Zion Curtain" and for better or worse thats how it will stay. I think it speaks volumes that this site jumped from 150 members to 4000 members in such a short period of time. I think THAT is a positive spin on the story.
~Amy~
They're never going to try to get an unbiased side of the story. This is Utah and the news plays to those that pay the bills...IE the church. Piss off the church, lose your license, your station or whatever.
Face it folks, we live "Behind the Zion Curtain" and for better or worse thats how it will stay. I think it speaks volumes that this site jumped from 150 members to 4000 members in such a short period of time. I think THAT is a positive spin on the story.
~Amy~
While I was prepared to inundate KSL with various forms of negation and rebuttal, in the event we were portrayed as "evil" (hey sorry, its the MBA/JD in me coming out strong -- I always love a great deliberation), I have to agree with FUN4USXX2001 as well as others; let it ride and die in silence.
Rob, good job. Well placed and thought-out comments (at least what they aired).
BTW, we have it recorded on our DVR and can burn it or convert it to an MPG if anyone missed it or wants it...
badpeople_inut (LOL) S & B
Rob, good job. Well placed and thought-out comments (at least what they aired).
BTW, we have it recorded on our DVR and can burn it or convert it to an MPG if anyone missed it or wants it...
badpeople_inut (LOL) S & B
Well, I myself have sent an email to KSL...I think their story was bullshit and I for one saw it as a pro-active anti-swinger story. I hate this state's politics when it comes to freedom of speech and society. It might as well be the Church's Republic of Utah and have it's own communist national anthem. I for one am pulling my membership in response to add protection to the privacy of my rights. I'm just glad no pictures were exposed. I can see everyone just going ...my god I wonder who is on that website and running to verify their kids or neighbors aren't on it.
A masters in journalism, interesting. Can you say "fallacies"? How many, and which form would best describe the numbers here in the KSL story line.
Bad news sales; good news stinks.
Bad news sales; good news stinks.
It was totally corny.
I can just picture the reporter (I hesitate to call her a journalist) saying, Ok... What's in our stock footage? A slamming door, a gavel, a bunch of rings falling on the ground... This is gonna be such a GREAT story!
I've seen high school news look more professional.
I think it'll bring a few people to the sites just out of curiosity.
-Greg
I can just picture the reporter (I hesitate to call her a journalist) saying, Ok... What's in our stock footage? A slamming door, a gavel, a bunch of rings falling on the ground... This is gonna be such a GREAT story!
I've seen high school news look more professional.
I think it'll bring a few people to the sites just out of curiosity.
-Greg
i am glad the reporters around here have better things to do with their time .Hey E and B
D was 99% sure that was you on KSL... the beers on me the next time we see you...
D was 99% sure that was you on KSL... the beers on me the next time we see you...
Well I must say that it wasnt nearly as bad as it could of been. Thanks to KSL's incompetence in reporting, the story was rather PG and was more opinion than anything. Maybe if I was one of those couples living in Draper I'd feel a bit more threatened. And maybe by being fairly sublte they were more effective than being blatantly obvious about how taboo swinging in Utah is even when compared to other states. In addition, there probably will be a handful more traffic on the site, but for some of us who are already careful about who we meet, it shouldn't be a problem. Finally, I think our Admin did a great job of answering their questions and I was surprised that his words weren't taken more out of context. Overall I think this has been a very interesting ordeal and I wonder how it will all turn out.
Love ya all, J
Love ya all, J
The story was terribley produced. Little to no research. As I said in the thread leading up to KSL being at the Club 90 party, they decided what story they were going to write before they even put pen to paper, and they were not going to let the truth get in the way of their story.
I particularily liked the way it played women to be victims in the Lifestyle, especially when everyone knows it is women that really run the show and have the biggest say-so in who a couple plays with. Also, in surveys of swingers when asked "Who's idea was it to start swinging?" 34% of the time it was the wife that first brought it up. Sure, men still accounted for 54% of the survey (the rest couldn't remember who's idea it was originally), but it's not the men wanting sex with other women and drawing their poor defenseless wife into the lurid underground world of wife swapping to do it. Hell, anyone who's been around it for a while knows it's more "husband swapping" anyway.
I've been following the comments on KSL's website, and these people have no life. They wait to watch the news every night and then add their two cents to every subject. None of them have any idea what they are talking about. As Ozzie Guillen says about arm chair coaches and sportscasters "the farther you sit from the plate the smarter you think you are." LMAO But all the comments are along the same lines, the evil cheating husband luring his innocent, unsuspecting wife into the seedy underworld.
Then you get the fake profile they put up and within "six days, 70 married men, most from Utah, ask to start a fling." LMAO Damn, how many couples get emails every day from "free member" married men looking to cheat? We get at least one a day. The same old story over and over: Married Mormon family man who says "I love my wife but she doesn't like sex". These people need to look within themselves. We're not the problem, they are. Plus, most of us won't play with cheaters and after a time we've become very adept at sniffing them out. My wife gets at least one married Mormon man a day sending her an IM on her personal Yahoo! Messenger ID, and they find her in the Yahoo! directory (not Yahoo! Personals, the directory). They just go through looking for women online to contact. They don't know she is a swinger. Her Yahoo! profile is innocent as can be. If they are going to cheat they will find a way, with or without swingers.
Wow... I'd love to say this on KSL's site, but like fun4usxx said, it will just add fuel to the fire and you can't win. You can't fix stupid.
Mr. Caress4u
I particularily liked the way it played women to be victims in the Lifestyle, especially when everyone knows it is women that really run the show and have the biggest say-so in who a couple plays with. Also, in surveys of swingers when asked "Who's idea was it to start swinging?" 34% of the time it was the wife that first brought it up. Sure, men still accounted for 54% of the survey (the rest couldn't remember who's idea it was originally), but it's not the men wanting sex with other women and drawing their poor defenseless wife into the lurid underground world of wife swapping to do it. Hell, anyone who's been around it for a while knows it's more "husband swapping" anyway.
I've been following the comments on KSL's website, and these people have no life. They wait to watch the news every night and then add their two cents to every subject. None of them have any idea what they are talking about. As Ozzie Guillen says about arm chair coaches and sportscasters "the farther you sit from the plate the smarter you think you are." LMAO But all the comments are along the same lines, the evil cheating husband luring his innocent, unsuspecting wife into the seedy underworld.
Then you get the fake profile they put up and within "six days, 70 married men, most from Utah, ask to start a fling." LMAO Damn, how many couples get emails every day from "free member" married men looking to cheat? We get at least one a day. The same old story over and over: Married Mormon family man who says "I love my wife but she doesn't like sex". These people need to look within themselves. We're not the problem, they are. Plus, most of us won't play with cheaters and after a time we've become very adept at sniffing them out. My wife gets at least one married Mormon man a day sending her an IM on her personal Yahoo! Messenger ID, and they find her in the Yahoo! directory (not Yahoo! Personals, the directory). They just go through looking for women online to contact. They don't know she is a swinger. Her Yahoo! profile is innocent as can be. If they are going to cheat they will find a way, with or without swingers.
Wow... I'd love to say this on KSL's site, but like fun4usxx said, it will just add fuel to the fire and you can't win. You can't fix stupid.
Mr. Caress4u
well thanks CRYSTALCLEAR469, i'll probably need'em especially if ksl is on the prowl with hidden camera's.....so what happened? ksl's blur machine didn't have enough power to blur my massive coconut!..the girls in the story were blurred pretty good and then my big mug stands out like sore thumb!...of course by midnite i usually have vision that's blurred anyway. mmm, maybe it's time to ditch the 'prince valiant' hair cut. lol. oh what the heck, if they boot me out of church i save 10 percent and have sundays off!.....they should have showed b she the cute one of the couple, and look's good on a rock in the woods. :v
For those of you guys out of town. This is the transcript from the KSL website.
"Everyone has shared their partners with everyone else in the room."
"You're in happy valley and you think nothing like that could happen."
An Eyewitness News Investigation takes us inside a delicate subject few people like to talk about -- infidelity, couples cheating, in secret, in the open, and joining a movement that appears to be gaining momentum.
We heard persistent rumors that spouse-swapping and adultery is commonplace in certain suburban neighborhoods. We discovered those rumors were based on at least some truth. People told us they were being recruited -- marriage counselors say they are seeing more if it.
There aren't statistics or easy answers, but it's clear the effects can be devastating.
Love, commitment, holy matrimony. In Utah, where marriage vows and family values run deep.
Woman: "They said it was more exciting when their spouse was involved."
This story will open eyes to something many would like to keep secret.
"It was taboo within their religious background."
"I thought, this can't be happening here. This is Utah."
Sometimes it's kept very quiet, among neighbors and friends. Other times, it's out in the open. Studies show infidelity is to blame for more than half of divorces in Utah. What we found surprised even experts.
We knocked on doors, attended a party. We heard stories by phone, by email, but nothing could match what we heard in a pocket of Draper.
"Something was wrong with every other neighbor in that neighborhood."
Her husband's indiscretions shattered their marriage.
"Intensely, intensely painful. It's the hardest thing I've ever been through in my life."
The divorce final, he remarried one of their neighbors within a week. It seems adultery ran rampant. Up the block it was consensual with other married neighbors cheating together.
People told us they moved to get away from it and stayed inside to avoid it. Across town one woman told us she just wanted to run from it:
"Everyone in the room had shared their partners with everyone else in the room. These people had been married five, 10, 20 years."
She and her husband were invited to a barbeque with couples from Draper, Provo, Sandy and Salt Lake. A doctor made a move.
"He's hitting on me, like he's single, and his wife's sitting right there. I think, there's another motive to this party and it's not just to hang out and meet new people."
They got out of there.
While there's no data, experts say it's proof of a trend.
Vicky Burgess/Ph.D. Clinical Psychologist: "I think, because sexual relations and sex itself is more open, I think we're seeing more of it."
We found there are several parties where couples can meet.
Randy Chatelain, Ph.D./ Marriage and Family Therapist: "I believe this kind of behavior is going to catch up with a couple, because where does it stop? What more do you have to involve to create the high?"
Hundreds of couples pack a popular Sandy nightclub.
"A lot of people nowadays have fantasies and they want to fulfill them with their significant other. This is the best way to do that."
This man, who asked not to be identified, built a business, helping couples meet at parties. His website suggests spouses can be in love and still enjoy sex with others.
"They figure, 'I would much rather do it with the person I love than have them do it behind my back.'"
From the looks of it, he's pretty successful. He has 4,000 members living in Utah. How fast is it growing? Four years ago there were 150 members.
How common is it? Posing as a married woman, we signed up on a website aimed at so-called "swingers." In six days, 70 married men, most from Utah, ask to start a fling.
"Everyone has shared their partners with everyone else in the room."
"You're in happy valley and you think nothing like that could happen."
An Eyewitness News Investigation takes us inside a delicate subject few people like to talk about -- infidelity, couples cheating, in secret, in the open, and joining a movement that appears to be gaining momentum.
We heard persistent rumors that spouse-swapping and adultery is commonplace in certain suburban neighborhoods. We discovered those rumors were based on at least some truth. People told us they were being recruited -- marriage counselors say they are seeing more if it.
There aren't statistics or easy answers, but it's clear the effects can be devastating.
Love, commitment, holy matrimony. In Utah, where marriage vows and family values run deep.
Woman: "They said it was more exciting when their spouse was involved."
This story will open eyes to something many would like to keep secret.
"It was taboo within their religious background."
"I thought, this can't be happening here. This is Utah."
Sometimes it's kept very quiet, among neighbors and friends. Other times, it's out in the open. Studies show infidelity is to blame for more than half of divorces in Utah. What we found surprised even experts.
We knocked on doors, attended a party. We heard stories by phone, by email, but nothing could match what we heard in a pocket of Draper.
"Something was wrong with every other neighbor in that neighborhood."
Her husband's indiscretions shattered their marriage.
"Intensely, intensely painful. It's the hardest thing I've ever been through in my life."
The divorce final, he remarried one of their neighbors within a week. It seems adultery ran rampant. Up the block it was consensual with other married neighbors cheating together.
People told us they moved to get away from it and stayed inside to avoid it. Across town one woman told us she just wanted to run from it:
"Everyone in the room had shared their partners with everyone else in the room. These people had been married five, 10, 20 years."
She and her husband were invited to a barbeque with couples from Draper, Provo, Sandy and Salt Lake. A doctor made a move.
"He's hitting on me, like he's single, and his wife's sitting right there. I think, there's another motive to this party and it's not just to hang out and meet new people."
They got out of there.
While there's no data, experts say it's proof of a trend.
Vicky Burgess/Ph.D. Clinical Psychologist: "I think, because sexual relations and sex itself is more open, I think we're seeing more of it."
We found there are several parties where couples can meet.
Randy Chatelain, Ph.D./ Marriage and Family Therapist: "I believe this kind of behavior is going to catch up with a couple, because where does it stop? What more do you have to involve to create the high?"
Hundreds of couples pack a popular Sandy nightclub.
"A lot of people nowadays have fantasies and they want to fulfill them with their significant other. This is the best way to do that."
This man, who asked not to be identified, built a business, helping couples meet at parties. His website suggests spouses can be in love and still enjoy sex with others.
"They figure, 'I would much rather do it with the person I love than have them do it behind my back.'"
From the looks of it, he's pretty successful. He has 4,000 members living in Utah. How fast is it growing? Four years ago there were 150 members.
How common is it? Posing as a married woman, we signed up on a website aimed at so-called "swingers." In six days, 70 married men, most from Utah, ask to start a fling.
As for someone that has lived in Utah for 13 years, lived behind the Zion Curtain, and even started up and ran Utah Afterdark for 3 years plus..... I am actually amazed they didn't take more of a slant on it. R & M are right (FUN4USXX2001) don't attack the KSL sight... it will only evoke more attention to us! As for the curious couples that saw it and will seek out the sight... Thank you KSL for the recruitment!
Rob, I have never met you, but do take notice to the fact they pointed out about the money you are making.... only takes one friend in the church working at the IRS to dig up more then you ever dreamed of.....
We didn't get hammered or unrealistically exposed... no one expected it to be an interview of acceptance.... But it wasn't all that negative.
Those that want to pull your profile for safety, do so.
But trust me, it could have been a lot worse!!!!
We are in Utah, we all love the views and we all have a great close nit of friends. But, our style is still not accepted by the general public.
Stay with what you are comfortable with people, and don't overact to anything.....
Just our 2 cents...
Dave & Kristie
Rob, I have never met you, but do take notice to the fact they pointed out about the money you are making.... only takes one friend in the church working at the IRS to dig up more then you ever dreamed of.....
We didn't get hammered or unrealistically exposed... no one expected it to be an interview of acceptance.... But it wasn't all that negative.
Those that want to pull your profile for safety, do so.
But trust me, it could have been a lot worse!!!!
We are in Utah, we all love the views and we all have a great close nit of friends. But, our style is still not accepted by the general public.
Stay with what you are comfortable with people, and don't overact to anything.....
Just our 2 cents...
Dave & Kristie
Wow, I was pretty surprised that they didn't take what I said and construe it. I'm also glad that they followed my wishes of NOT mentioning the names of this website or The Spice Party and it's website. They stuck to their part of the deal.
For those of you who didn't get to see it, here is the link to the actual video footage:
http://real.ksl.com/video/slc/1/110/11040.ram
You will need Real Player to watch it which can be downloaded here for free:
http://www.real.com/realcom/R?href=http%3A%2F%2Fforms.real.com%2Freal%2Frealone%2Frealone.html%3Ftype%3Ddlrhap_rh%26bb%3Dtrue%26pcode%3Drn%26opage%3Drealplayer_8020%26src%3Drealhome_bb_0_1_1_0_0_1_0%2Crealplayer_8020%26pageregion%3Dright_bottom_text&pageid=unagi.8083640&pageregion=right_bottom_text&src=realhome_bb_0_1_1_0_0_1_0%2Crealplayer_8020&pcode=rn&opage=realplayer_8020
For those of you who didn't get to see it, here is the link to the actual video footage:
http://real.ksl.com/video/slc/1/110/11040.ram
You will need Real Player to watch it which can be downloaded here for free:
http://www.real.com/realcom/R?href=http%3A%2F%2Fforms.real.com%2Freal%2Frealone%2Frealone.html%3Ftype%3Ddlrhap_rh%26bb%3Dtrue%26pcode%3Drn%26opage%3Drealplayer_8020%26src%3Drealhome_bb_0_1_1_0_0_1_0%2Crealplayer_8020%26pageregion%3Dright_bottom_text&pageid=unagi.8083640&pageregion=right_bottom_text&src=realhome_bb_0_1_1_0_0_1_0%2Crealplayer_8020&pcode=rn&opage=realplayer_8020
I wouldn't say that, Rob. They did a piss-poor job of bluring out "Spice" on the party ticket and had a pretty good shot of the intro page and Swingular is #4 on the sponsored links if you do a Google search for "swingers and Utah". It won't be hard to find. I'd recommend disabling the "Swingers in your area" part of the intro page for a while.
The root of it is that this story is about cheating, not swinging. All it talks about is married men cheating with their neighbors and looking for sex online all the while making helpless victims out of women. That has nothing to do with swinging, that is plain old fashioned cheating on your spouse. But the slant KSL put on it to make something out of a non-story is interesting. It gives great fuel for the gossip in the Relief Society and Priesthood meetings.
What's interesting about this also is, I read somewhere once that although less then 1% of the general population actually does swing, as much as 40% of people fantasize and talk about it with their spouse. Hypocrites.
Mr.
The root of it is that this story is about cheating, not swinging. All it talks about is married men cheating with their neighbors and looking for sex online all the while making helpless victims out of women. That has nothing to do with swinging, that is plain old fashioned cheating on your spouse. But the slant KSL put on it to make something out of a non-story is interesting. It gives great fuel for the gossip in the Relief Society and Priesthood meetings.
What's interesting about this also is, I read somewhere once that although less then 1% of the general population actually does swing, as much as 40% of people fantasize and talk about it with their spouse. Hypocrites.
Mr.
Thts true Rob good job on the Spice party ticket..Also like the how they got into the Club 90 party...Let me tell u now u wnt to see a party wtch the week of June 1....if things will fall right..PS peeps thts on my kid if I can lock the deal.