Fantasizing about Foursomes
When it comes to group sex, look before you leap
Sept. 18, 2003
In this week's Sexploration column, sex therapist Al Cooper, Ph.D. the clinical director of the San Jose Marital and Sexuality Centre, with contributions by David Marcus, Ph.D., offer their advice to a reader who fantasizes about having a sexual foursome with his fianc
When it comes to group sex, look before you leap
Sept. 18, 2003
In this week's Sexploration column, sex therapist Al Cooper, Ph.D. the clinical director of the San Jose Marital and Sexuality Centre, with contributions by David Marcus, Ph.D., offer their advice to a reader who fantasizes about having a sexual foursome with his fianc
Basically the old saying...."Be careful whatcha ask for ". Alot of the younger set seem to think its all good and there is no fall out from swinging but what they fail to realize is that you must have one strong commitment to each other and communcation is the key element. The advice was dead one about the rules don't make them up on the fly have seen ppl do this and holy hannah the fallout that ensued was horrid. When ppl ask us about it we always without fail tell them TALK,TALK somemore and TALK again cause once ya do it there is no undoing it.
Maybe I've gotten too sensitive, I thought this was going to be one of those articles bashing everyone who participates in the lifestyle. But it actually ended up being pretty fair. We've chatted with (and met at clubs) quite a few people who were new to this, and we gave them the same advice as was mentioned above - communication with each other is 100% essential, both before AND after you decide to try it.
The other thing we generally say is, it's definitely not for everyone, but if all the elements are there (trust, compassion, committment to each other, etc), than it's as much fun as anything you can share together (that's what we've found, anyway).
The other thing we generally say is, it's definitely not for everyone, but if all the elements are there (trust, compassion, committment to each other, etc), than it's as much fun as anything you can share together (that's what we've found, anyway).
Reminds me of our ? to the forum. which was are swingers more spiritual than others vanilla couples?
ANSWER: Not nessecary but what the relationship of spiritual not to be mistaken for religous by anymeans, does for any person or couple is absolute mindblowing and is incredible. Spirituality definitly strengthens an indiviual when a couple are truely HERE AND NOW, AWAKE, IN THE PRESENT MOMENT, etc.. call it what you like but not religous lol. The out come of any relationship sexual, friendly, business, etc.. that you cross among has no bearing on your choices. It has enhanced Tre and I's relationship to levels never dreamed of and we dream big NOW. so I say that if a couple breaks up over swinging well it was just meant to be and they only put the thrusters in it. It would have been the outcome for any reason in the future if they didn't swing too.
"So remember this ,,,Everythings happen for a reason and there is no such thing as an accident"
kisses,
Jessica and Tre smile truth is truth
ANSWER: Not nessecary but what the relationship of spiritual not to be mistaken for religous by anymeans, does for any person or couple is absolute mindblowing and is incredible. Spirituality definitly strengthens an indiviual when a couple are truely HERE AND NOW, AWAKE, IN THE PRESENT MOMENT, etc.. call it what you like but not religous lol. The out come of any relationship sexual, friendly, business, etc.. that you cross among has no bearing on your choices. It has enhanced Tre and I's relationship to levels never dreamed of and we dream big NOW. so I say that if a couple breaks up over swinging well it was just meant to be and they only put the thrusters in it. It would have been the outcome for any reason in the future if they didn't swing too.
"So remember this ,,,Everythings happen for a reason and there is no such thing as an accident"
kisses,
Jessica and Tre smile truth is truth