We are having trouble finding a steady male or female that wants to enter into a relationship with a sexy couple from central Illinois.All the playmates we end up with are either married and their spouse doesnt play. or the are single and want to play the field awhile.I guess we are way to picky on who we invite home with us. Is anyone else having this problem?
your most certainly not alone. Although we prefer couple play most of the time we have enjoyed a couple MFM's and found it difficult to sort through all the bs to find someone who is both genuine and discreet as well that we could have fun with on a more regular basis.Guess it just cums with the territory. 
we too are a central IL couple that have had our problems finding long term friends, seems like there are only a few out there, so I guess you are not in this alone, we would be interested in getting to know you guys if you have the same interest, anita and michael
We are having a simular problem. My wife is giving me our first FMF for my birthday. Problem is we can't find another woman to play.
Very frustrating.:@
Very frustrating.:@
Damn, sorry to hear you are having that problem. I have the same, but opposite problem, a single guy that would like to find something ongoing, but not able to find a couple that really is interested in something more steady.
Hopefully you will work something out, I'm sure that there has to be guys that would love to find just that.
-Peter
Hopefully you will work something out, I'm sure that there has to be guys that would love to find just that.
-Peter
Our luck is like the others here. Seems everyone wants to lie and play games. We would love to find a regular guy for her to play with. Seems impossible.
I'm in the opposite boat. I am very discrete male looking for a couple to play with, nothing serious just some adults having a good time. I agree with the other posters, life is way too short to mess around with all the drama!
We find most single guys are married on here lol, we dont care what wife says married is married right mmmmmmmm.. And if wife wants you gons so bad you must be real bad think about that one..
You are absolutely what I look for although I don't know if there would be problems with either my age or being about 20 lbs over. Being tagged a single male in itself seems a curse but if any action then it is only for very limited or short term and I don't even see that. I guess I am located too far from the many who might consider SM's (no pun intended). In addition, long term association which is really rare in my opinion is something to be thankful for. Come to think of it, it sounds really hot!
no pekin
were out in ma. and yes have the same problem no one want's the long term seems everyone wants to play in the pasture so to speek so were kinda hanging out thair but still hopefull:z
were out in ma. and yes have the same problem no one want's the long term seems everyone wants to play in the pasture so to speek
so were kinda hanging out thair but still hopefull:zI am also a single male -- for real -- who would love to enter into a longterm relationship with a couple. There must be a lot of outright liars out there, but there are also some honest men.
Some in the lifestyle are also interested in polyamory, so I would love to hear from anyone even interested in discussing the possibilities.
Some in the lifestyle are also interested in polyamory, so I would love to hear from anyone even interested in discussing the possibilities.
I also am a single male and haven't found a couple that would be interested in a long term relationship. I am not a big fan of one night stands with someone I don't know and prefer to connect first at the physical level and then (more importantly) at the mental level.
At this time I am not interested in a relationship but.... a fella has needs!! lol <sob>
It would be nice to have some real friends that are in a strong relationship/marriage, that you could be with for an evening/weekend... making his wife the center of attention... who views a 3rd as an enhancement not as a threat..... and at the end of the evening/weekend leave them to enjoy themselves. Lots of variations on that theme! :z
Oh... and kissing is a must!
:h
David
At this time I am not interested in a relationship but.... a fella has needs!! lol <sob>
It would be nice to have some real friends that are in a strong relationship/marriage, that you could be with for an evening/weekend... making his wife the center of attention... who views a 3rd as an enhancement not as a threat..... and at the end of the evening/weekend leave them to enjoy themselves. Lots of variations on that theme! :z
Oh... and kissing is a must!
:h
David
Try being a 54 year old man and have a steady threesome. I have mostly one night stands and love both FMF and MFM threesomes. I really enjoy the FMF threesomes with bi females. How sexy that is and it is a real turn on.
I think one reason that people are having trouble finding LTR singles or even couples is a two fold thing. Typically Couples get into swinging to share the experience and believe it or not for sexual variety... live their fantasies and the second thrust is that these are the people who are most wanted... the under 45 set.. There is that portion of the swinging community, of late, that is in the over 50 set and empty nesters and up to, say, 65 group (we really don't see too many people over 65 into swinging much) . This older group is looking for friends with benefits. People that they can enjoy life with, have sex, if that happens and generally an extended monogamous or maybe a poly relationship with. So if you are looking for this couple of single to be kind of exclusive with look older... They are there...
I am having trouble finding couples who want to have threesomes with.....could it be I am bi???? I am but that doesn't mean that I have to be bi or lust after guys. I just like sex and enjoy like minded people. Lets have more sex and just enjoy the moment.
thats for sure, it is no different in Florida,, most single males we have met have been nothing like ( i mean not even similar to ) what they say they are or pretend to be online, it is a real shame,, hard to find thats for sure, and the single female, omg, have never even seen one of those in 7 years of swinging,, still try and remain hopefull though lol,,
A topic close to my heart...
We prefer the company of singles for many reasons, so I wont bore any of you with them all. I will say that we have made a few terrific friends that were couples in this lifestyle. We just feel that a long term relationship with the right single person would make things that much more erotic and fun. Familiarity and comfort only grow as time goes by, allowing you to learn about each other both physically and socially. With that knowledge comes the understanding of how to entice and please one another.
In our humble opinion, you cant get that at a swing club, at a sex party, or online. You can have a whole lot of sex, yes. But sex is better when you have had time to learn what makes your partner tick. And that takes time.
We have known one guy for over 5 years and he is our principal sex partner. We know him well, he was our best man in our wedding. He has his life and we have ours, but mRs. Luvbugs knows every inch of him and exactly how to turn him on and get him off. It was an evolution, yes, 5 years is quite a while to develope that kind of relationship...but our sex as a group is mind blowing and that know how is priceless isnt it?
We have problems meeting new people because we have standards, and we are completely unwilling to bend them. We demand honesty, respect, and genuine friendship from those we see socially. It is incredible how many people can not meet such simple criteria. There seems to be an abundance of men willing to cheat, women who are not for real, and people in general who seem to thrive from hurting others, or would use swinging hurt anyone. If we can not meet a single man or woman who meets those standards, what are we losing? Someone, like our friend i mentioned before is out there, and even if that guy or girl is the diamond in the proverbial rough...we are prepared to wait.
You are not being too picky. You are just not willing to lower your standards.
Just my .02 cents.
Luvbugs! (mR.)
We prefer the company of singles for many reasons, so I wont bore any of you with them all. I will say that we have made a few terrific friends that were couples in this lifestyle. We just feel that a long term relationship with the right single person would make things that much more erotic and fun. Familiarity and comfort only grow as time goes by, allowing you to learn about each other both physically and socially. With that knowledge comes the understanding of how to entice and please one another.
In our humble opinion, you cant get that at a swing club, at a sex party, or online. You can have a whole lot of sex, yes. But sex is better when you have had time to learn what makes your partner tick. And that takes time.
We have known one guy for over 5 years and he is our principal sex partner. We know him well, he was our best man in our wedding. He has his life and we have ours, but mRs. Luvbugs knows every inch of him and exactly how to turn him on and get him off. It was an evolution, yes, 5 years is quite a while to develope that kind of relationship...but our sex as a group is mind blowing and that know how is priceless isnt it?
We have problems meeting new people because we have standards, and we are completely unwilling to bend them. We demand honesty, respect, and genuine friendship from those we see socially. It is incredible how many people can not meet such simple criteria. There seems to be an abundance of men willing to cheat, women who are not for real, and people in general who seem to thrive from hurting others, or would use swinging hurt anyone. If we can not meet a single man or woman who meets those standards, what are we losing? Someone, like our friend i mentioned before is out there, and even if that guy or girl is the diamond in the proverbial rough...we are prepared to wait.
You are not being too picky. You are just not willing to lower your standards.
Just my .02 cents.
Luvbugs! (mR.)
We are having trouble finding a steady male or female also if we could find one that would stay around for more then a one night stand the the lifestyle would be more intrestingfo us then if are steady male or female would stay steady we could do the bare back more often with out all the worries of some one having somthing
Linda enjoys seeing two great single guys that took two years to locate. They are gentlemen and treat Linda like a princess. Lately we have had a regular get together once a week. Usually one of them but on occasion both of them. We are lucky we have not one but two compatible guys. Hopefully they won't move away....
In our case, she lets me play alone with whom ever I chose. We always have her talk to them befor hand. Not that she is checking them out as much as letting them know she is ok with it.
We are a couple and prefer to play that way. The few times I have gone out alone, was with a couple WE had played with before.
We are a couple and prefer to play that way. The few times I have gone out alone, was with a couple WE had played with before.
threesum is always a great way to explore each other
It takes us a loooong time to find a guy we even like, let alone a regular friend. We get asked why we won't meet guys from far away. The reason is the local guys don't want more than a one time thing and won't show up. We assume the long distance guys will never show more than once, if at all. We envy those here who have found a regular play friend. We doubt we will ever find one.
Well, I know myself, being a single male and being able to see a couple in a long term relationship would be great, however I haven't been able to find a couple like that. Most of the couples I have met only want a single male to be available to them on a as needed basis. I understand that because this is more of a couples oriented lifestyle. I would not want to rush into anything unless it was with a great couple that I knew were going to be around for a long time and then at that point it would be a very fun relationship.....any takers in this area?? I'm one of the nice ones!
We are having the same problem in Fl but we figured it was our location, in country.
But we will keep trying!!!
But we will keep trying!!!
nope you are not alone we have been trying to find that right person .. an it's seem we are asking for too much because we want a live in female and it seems no one is looking for that here
I'm the guy that can't find a couple that just wants a cool guy, which is just what I am. It's just too bad.
Those interested in the dynamics of threesomes might want to read "Threesomes" Studies in Sex, Power and Intimacy By Arno Karlen. It was first published in 1988. Probably can get a cheap used onr from Amazon
All I know...my wife loves them.
Hi all,
Well, I am glad someone broached the issue concerning regular threesome play with males and females. I am a single guy, and enjoy the company of others...especially couples, however, it is hard to find couples that are truly interested in MFM play based upon my experiences. (It's not looks, or attitude at all.) I think the majority of couples are a little "gun-shy" when it comes to playing with males because of the typical stereotypes that are associated with them and the previous encounters they have had with men that fit those stereotypes.
I will say that not all men fall into that category, as you have noticed from the attention given to this topic by men. Good men, and women, playmates are hard to come by.. and I think alot of couples on this site (not all) just dont know what they want. If MFM, or FMF, play is what you want.. and you want it to be a regular thing, or just a one time encounter..then seek out the people that can provide that to you and invite them along.
Trust and discreetness are the two big words that come to mind when inviting partners to play.... however..trust has to be earned. I think coulpes that use good judgement and actively seek out what they want...win every time....and the rest falls into place.
We are all here for a reason...to experiecne great sex. Everyone has their likes and dislikes naturally, but it helps when people give others the benifit of the doubt, when an attraction is present, to chat and become better acquanted to see if "playtime" is the next thing on the agenda after issues concerning "good naturedness", and agendas are discussed. (Being on the same wavelength.)
Another thing I have noticed, is that people can be way too picky. (But then again, that depends on what standards you have. A good think when looked at from that perspective.) I think the majority of us are here for good times and good sex. When couples limit their options to people that are in a 25 mile radius, blond hair and eyes, awesome legs, over 10 inches of meat...finding someone can be difficult.. especially for the couples that want regular MFM, FMF play. Branch out a bit and dont limit your options..... but dont settle either.
And another thing...men aren't so bad...they just have healthy appetites for sex. I seriously doubt that men will refrain from cumming back for more with couples when the sex is good, fun, discreet, and mutual. (Women too for that matter.) Ego stroking helps too for the guys (and ladies with their "body ego's" ). It's similar to a relationship... just handled in a different fashion. (And like a relationship...it's what you make of it.) In my experiences, I have noticed and dealt with a lot of "low-lifes" out there..... I dismiss them...notice them for what they are, and focus my attentions to the ones that are worthwhile. (I have had the pleasure of a couple seeking me out a few times for play, but it is rare.... I think if your a couple and you want a MFM or MFF, then come on to people, play with them a bit by teasing them and flirting, and just see what happens. They may turn into the long-term partner your looking for. (Or the one time encounter your looking for.) Either way...it's what we make of it.
My 22 cents. Jeeze, long enough.
Well, I am glad someone broached the issue concerning regular threesome play with males and females. I am a single guy, and enjoy the company of others...especially couples, however, it is hard to find couples that are truly interested in MFM play based upon my experiences. (It's not looks, or attitude at all.) I think the majority of couples are a little "gun-shy" when it comes to playing with males because of the typical stereotypes that are associated with them and the previous encounters they have had with men that fit those stereotypes.
I will say that not all men fall into that category, as you have noticed from the attention given to this topic by men. Good men, and women, playmates are hard to come by.. and I think alot of couples on this site (not all) just dont know what they want. If MFM, or FMF, play is what you want.. and you want it to be a regular thing, or just a one time encounter..then seek out the people that can provide that to you and invite them along.
Trust and discreetness are the two big words that come to mind when inviting partners to play.... however..trust has to be earned. I think coulpes that use good judgement and actively seek out what they want...win every time....and the rest falls into place.
We are all here for a reason...to experiecne great sex. Everyone has their likes and dislikes naturally, but it helps when people give others the benifit of the doubt, when an attraction is present, to chat and become better acquanted to see if "playtime" is the next thing on the agenda after issues concerning "good naturedness", and agendas are discussed. (Being on the same wavelength.)
Another thing I have noticed, is that people can be way too picky. (But then again, that depends on what standards you have. A good think when looked at from that perspective.) I think the majority of us are here for good times and good sex. When couples limit their options to people that are in a 25 mile radius, blond hair and eyes, awesome legs, over 10 inches of meat...finding someone can be difficult.. especially for the couples that want regular MFM, FMF play. Branch out a bit and dont limit your options..... but dont settle either.
And another thing...men aren't so bad...they just have healthy appetites for sex.
I seriously doubt that men will refrain from cumming back for more with couples when the sex is good, fun, discreet, and mutual. (Women too for that matter.) Ego stroking helps too for the guys (and ladies with their "body ego's" ). It's similar to a relationship... just handled in a different fashion. (And like a relationship...it's what you make of it.) In my experiences, I have noticed and dealt with a lot of "low-lifes" out there..... I dismiss them...notice them for what they are, and focus my attentions to the ones that are worthwhile. (I have had the pleasure of a couple seeking me out a few times for play, but it is rare.... I think if your a couple and you want a MFM or MFF, then come on to people, play with them a bit by teasing them and flirting, and just see what happens. They may turn into the long-term partner your looking for. (Or the one time encounter your looking for.) Either way...it's what we make of it. My 22 cents.
Jeeze, long enough.Very well said LONGLUKE4U.........we enjoy MFM's and have many great experiences with very good men who are on our "regulars" list lol.
We've had a few poor experiences too, and we chalk it up to experience and move on.
We recently spent a weekend away from home and had set up 2 meetings with 2 different guyson 2 different nights. Fridays mystery man had an emergency and couldn't make it, he called, explained he couldn't make it and suggested we meet on Saturday, we explained that we had other commitments and all was well.
Saturdays mystery man just decided not to show at all, so here we are waiting in an expensive room, no phone call.......no message....no nothing. If an emergency happens, let someone know........if we'd have know Saturday man was not going to make it......we'd have called Friday guy.
We always provide a way of reaching us in case of emergency (we know all about it with 3 teens at home LOL) be it our cell numbers or the IM we use.
A little respect on both sides goes a long way.
Just our .23 cents worth
J&R
We've had a few poor experiences too, and we chalk it up to experience and move on.
We recently spent a weekend away from home and had set up 2 meetings with 2 different guyson 2 different nights. Fridays mystery man had an emergency and couldn't make it, he called, explained he couldn't make it and suggested we meet on Saturday, we explained that we had other commitments and all was well.
Saturdays mystery man just decided not to show at all, so here we are waiting in an expensive room, no phone call.......no message....no nothing. If an emergency happens, let someone know........if we'd have know Saturday man was not going to make it......we'd have called Friday guy.
We always provide a way of reaching us in case of emergency (we know all about it with 3 teens at home LOL) be it our cell numbers or the IM we use.
A little respect on both sides goes a long way.
Just our .23 cents worth
J&R
I think finding a regular person takes time, luck, and a lot of attempts with the wrong ones first to find the right one. Just like dating before marraige.
Yeah we can certainly undestand all of the postings we have read! We have been in this lifestyle for a little over 7 years now. First playing with couples then we found as most either have or will the amount of drama involved. As couples go one of two things will happen, their personal relationship will be enhanced or it will end. Even if it is couple/couple play.
Out of the numerous friends in the life we have met, only two of the couples are still together. While we dont oppose couple/couple play it is not something we do any longer. But finding a single woman to play with either for her or as part of our couple is very hard at times. We have been blessed to have certain play friends that are in fact true friends and we have the benefit of being able to share them phsyically as well.
I think what everyone needs to estblish early on are there own limits of play and respecting the limits of others in the lifestyle. Bringing anyone even if it is just physical into your life is or can be a stressful situation, so communication amongest yourselves as well as others is always the true key to happiness and a long term relationship. But amongest the lifestyle people are the wantabes and the game players, sad but true is that part of this lifestyle.
L & L
Out of the numerous friends in the life we have met, only two of the couples are still together. While we dont oppose couple/couple play it is not something we do any longer. But finding a single woman to play with either for her or as part of our couple is very hard at times. We have been blessed to have certain play friends that are in fact true friends and we have the benefit of being able to share them phsyically as well.
I think what everyone needs to estblish early on are there own limits of play and respecting the limits of others in the lifestyle. Bringing anyone even if it is just physical into your life is or can be a stressful situation, so communication amongest yourselves as well as others is always the true key to happiness and a long term relationship. But amongest the lifestyle people are the wantabes and the game players, sad but true is that part of this lifestyle.
L & L