Help us out?? We have been dabbling in the
This one is a hard one and I know at times I have been less tactful than others, like ignoring emails. Sometimes saying your intersts don't match or your not looking to add to your friend list. Plain and simple, works just fine.
Oh yes, this is something we struggle with as well on both ends of it. First, if we meet a couple and we just aren't interested in pursuing a physical relationship, we have found what works best for us is to just be open and honest about it by saying something along the lines of, "Thank you for giving us the chance to sit down with you to get to know you a bit. We really enjoyed our time and think you are great people; however, we do not feel that we are a good match for each other and we wish you all best in your pursuits in the lifestyle and we do hope to be able to be friends as we all move forward."
Of course, some people are going to take this better than others, but the thing to keep in mind is that you are not responsible for how the message is received; you are only responsible for the delivery of the message.
We are one of those couples who would much rather know there is no interest there rather than having someone dance around the issue with us. We are mature adults and we can handle being told that we might not be a good match for someone because we know that everyone has different tastes. Additionally, as cliche as it may sound, we really do believe friendship with like-minded people is just as important, if not more important, than establishing sexual relationships.
Of course, some people are going to take this better than others, but the thing to keep in mind is that you are not responsible for how the message is received; you are only responsible for the delivery of the message.
We are one of those couples who would much rather know there is no interest there rather than having someone dance around the issue with us. We are mature adults and we can handle being told that we might not be a good match for someone because we know that everyone has different tastes. Additionally, as cliche as it may sound, we really do believe friendship with like-minded people is just as important, if not more important, than establishing sexual relationships.
Just be honest. If you have never met and don't care to just let them know. We are grown adults. If you have met and choose that you don't want to again again let them know. Just be kind and considerate. Take measures that assures you can walk away feeling good about your actions. If they can't handle it or choose to be angry about something it is their choice. We have had a few that seemed interested and then would just ignore us. It is really no big deal. Life is to short for grudges and too short to squeeze in everything anyhow.
Nobody really has a choice of what they are attracted to and like when it comes to people, food or anything else for that matter. I know I love my wife and I think she is beautiful but I doubt if I will ever figure out why I think she beautiful. She just is. I also like pistachio ice cream, Peroni beer and true italian pizza. It is what it is.
Nobody really has a choice of what they are attracted to and like when it comes to people, food or anything else for that matter. I know I love my wife and I think she is beautiful but I doubt if I will ever figure out why I think she beautiful. She just is. I also like pistachio ice cream, Peroni beer and true italian pizza. It is what it is.
There are so many folks to meet and know better. We don't worry about the small stuff and have no problem with not preferring others or them not preferring us. It is what it is and we just go with the flow and we do not get stressed.
We also realize that she likes certain guys more and I like certain women more. While we do not take one for the team we have different levels of attraction for the couples we are with and we are ok with that.
We also realize that she likes certain guys more and I like certain women more. While we do not take one for the team we have different levels of attraction for the couples we are with and we are ok with that.
I think that's a spectacular question, that doesn't have an answer. All of your approaches work for some folks and not for others, so pick the one you like and stick with it.
And that is a smokin' hot dress...
And that is a smokin' hot dress...
There are so many folks to meet and know better. We don't worry about the small stuff and have no problem with not preferring others or them not preferring us. It is what it is and we just go with the flow and we do not get stressed.
We also realize that she likes certain guys more and I like certain women more. While we do not take one for the team we have different levels of attraction for the couples we are with and we are ok with that.
We also realize that she likes certain guys more and I like certain women more. While we do not take one for the team we have different levels of attraction for the couples we are with and we are ok with that.
I think that's a spectacular question, that doesn't have an answer. All of your approaches work for some folks and not for others, so pick the one you like and stick with it.
And that is a smokin' hot dress...
And that is a smokin' hot dress...
No matter how "easy" you try to make it, some people, unfortunately, will never LET you make it easy. Let's face it, rejection sucks and some people just don't take it well...if at all! We've tried every imaginable way to let people down easy and trust me, there is no magic bullet that works for everyone. If there was we totally would have patented it, made a fortune selling "Swinging For Dummies" books and would be living on a tropical island surrounded only by hot sexy swingers that we find spectacularly attractive. 