You know, I have read every thread written about all the "problems" that solo males have, and WHY we end up having the troubles we do, but I am firmly convinced that it is not all the responsibility of we solo males.
My biggest pet peeve is the incredible ARROGANCE of some of the people in this lifestyle that they think they are so hot, and so desirable that everyone must only want the privilege of hopping into the sack with them...
Now, I realize this is going to create yet another firestorm, and I will bet my next year's salary that some dumb-ass redneck-type will jump on me for "crying" about it, but they can all kiss my ass. I am not going to let some ignorant buffoon look down on me.
I have gone out of my way to be as respectful as possible to everyone on this site, regardless of whether or not I even wanted to meet them, and the vast majority of people with whom I have interacted, especially on the video-chat room are wonderful folks, and I believe I have earned a modicum of respect for not being a typical solo male. I think I am well liked, and based on the conversations, joking, and fun we all have on the videochat, I am sure this is the case...
Now, it is the people who live in and around my area that have this huge attitude problem, regarding everyone else... I have the occasion to visit a nearby city in a few weeks, and someone with whom I felt I had a reasonably friendly relationship lives there. I mentioned I would be in their town, when, and suggested that we all say hello, and have coffee or lunch, making it clear that I had no desire for anything more. No play, no nothing, because as a couple, if they want to play I believe that as a solo male it is up to THEM to tell ME they want that.
What was I met with? "She is not interested in meeting new people at this time"... Who the hell does this person think she is? Does she feel her anatomy is gold-plated and that is all I wanted from her? I was so dumbstruck by that comment, that it was all I could do to retain my composure. I made it clear I didnt' want to do anything else other than a friendly hello, but this stupid, childish, and utterly arrogant attitude of bashing solo males has got to go. We are all freaking adults. My wife told me that even though she doesn't know any of these people in the lifestyle, and that she has never had any interaction with them, that if she had been the one to suggest a meet, even for only coffee, that everyone else would fall all over themselves to get to her.
People, everyone needs to grow the hell up and realize that not everyone wants to screw you. You are no better than anyone else on this site, or any other site, and if you don't want to express the human courtesy to at least say hello to someone from another town who is in your area, then you have enough personal issues that you need to rethink what the hell you are even doing here.
I have just about had it with the holier-than-thou folks on sites like this who think they are better than anyone else, and that they think they have the right to abdicate their basic human courtesy because some other group has been declared persona non grata by default.
Now, having said that, I am going to reiterate that I don't give a rat's rosy red ass about the ignorant buffoons on here who are going to throw their two cents in, because they are part of the problem, as long as they are not contributing to a solution. They will prove my point for me.
Get it straight before you respond now, There is NO excuse for being impolite, regardless of whether or not you want to have adult activities. And I didn't. And don't. And I resent like hell that someone thinks they're better than me because by their very response, they showed they were not.
Fire away...
My biggest pet peeve is the incredible ARROGANCE of some of the people in this lifestyle that they think they are so hot, and so desirable that everyone must only want the privilege of hopping into the sack with them...
Now, I realize this is going to create yet another firestorm, and I will bet my next year's salary that some dumb-ass redneck-type will jump on me for "crying" about it, but they can all kiss my ass. I am not going to let some ignorant buffoon look down on me.
I have gone out of my way to be as respectful as possible to everyone on this site, regardless of whether or not I even wanted to meet them, and the vast majority of people with whom I have interacted, especially on the video-chat room are wonderful folks, and I believe I have earned a modicum of respect for not being a typical solo male. I think I am well liked, and based on the conversations, joking, and fun we all have on the videochat, I am sure this is the case...
Now, it is the people who live in and around my area that have this huge attitude problem, regarding everyone else... I have the occasion to visit a nearby city in a few weeks, and someone with whom I felt I had a reasonably friendly relationship lives there. I mentioned I would be in their town, when, and suggested that we all say hello, and have coffee or lunch, making it clear that I had no desire for anything more. No play, no nothing, because as a couple, if they want to play I believe that as a solo male it is up to THEM to tell ME they want that.
What was I met with? "She is not interested in meeting new people at this time"... Who the hell does this person think she is? Does she feel her anatomy is gold-plated and that is all I wanted from her? I was so dumbstruck by that comment, that it was all I could do to retain my composure. I made it clear I didnt' want to do anything else other than a friendly hello, but this stupid, childish, and utterly arrogant attitude of bashing solo males has got to go. We are all freaking adults. My wife told me that even though she doesn't know any of these people in the lifestyle, and that she has never had any interaction with them, that if she had been the one to suggest a meet, even for only coffee, that everyone else would fall all over themselves to get to her.
People, everyone needs to grow the hell up and realize that not everyone wants to screw you. You are no better than anyone else on this site, or any other site, and if you don't want to express the human courtesy to at least say hello to someone from another town who is in your area, then you have enough personal issues that you need to rethink what the hell you are even doing here.
I have just about had it with the holier-than-thou folks on sites like this who think they are better than anyone else, and that they think they have the right to abdicate their basic human courtesy because some other group has been declared persona non grata by default.
Now, having said that, I am going to reiterate that I don't give a rat's rosy red ass about the ignorant buffoons on here who are going to throw their two cents in, because they are part of the problem, as long as they are not contributing to a solution. They will prove my point for me.
Get it straight before you respond now, There is NO excuse for being impolite, regardless of whether or not you want to have adult activities. And I didn't. And don't. And I resent like hell that someone thinks they're better than me because by their very response, they showed they were not.
Fire away...
Just wanted to say that of all the times we've been in chat, you have always been very respectful (and there are MANY single males in chat that have been crude, pushy and disrespectful).......Sorry to hear you were treated so badly. We aren't looking for single males either, but JESUS, that doesn't mean I wont chat and flirt (tits)- or feel we have to be rude to single guys (unless they overstep the boundaries we've set).....
LOL the very few single guys that make it into our club are normally lookin for the bar for a rest. A respectful well spoken single gentlemen can get HUGE amounts of "action" by just being a decent guy.
BUT the few that screw up, man it screws it for a lot of guys....
Hang in there and if you get up to cheeseland we will hook you up with a party
Tina/marty
BUT the few that screw up, man it screws it for a lot of guys....
Hang in there and if you get up to cheeseland we will hook you up with a party
Tina/marty
Being a man that goes both solo and as a couple...I can see your point, BUT I also know what uyou experienced is not ONLY towards single men...PERSONALLY, I believe it is the HUSBANDS in the couples that have issues with other men being with their wives...NOT the women...We have met couples, had GREAT conversation, and I have heard the man tell my wife what HE was going to do to her, and then he leans to me and says something to the eefect of, "I cannot wait to get your wife in bed, she is HOT.
I respond,' The feelings are mutual pal!" To which he responds, "Oh I did not say that...I do not allow men to fuck my wife!" OK now...that was one incident...Being a blessed man, I have been stopped in the middle of foreplay because, "I do not want that thing in my wife!" as he is fucking mine...That being said, I will pass this along to you AEGIS...you are right...Lots of people are stuck up...but it is simple...THIS LIFESTYLE IS ABOUT PLEASURE AND ENJOYMENT...therefore if someone DOES NOT want to meet you it is their choice...whether for coffee or anything else...NOT your choice...Also...IF more single men READ profiles, the relative hatred towards single men would go away...MOST couples have things in their profile saying what they do and do not want...YET it tends to be SINGLE MEN who send emails containing pics we do not want or bby the virtue of being that someone does not entertain single men and still gets an email from them...this demonstrates a lack of coutness on their part...Now...one question for you...Did the coupel in question have "no single men" in their profile? What does it say they are seaching for, does it include single men? if it does...well...I would assume they do not want to meet anyone new...if it includes disclaimers saying no single men...YOU are at fault...No single men means no single men...not no single men unless they are passing through town and want some coffee...
Again,.....my 2 cents...if it offends TS...
I respond,' The feelings are mutual pal!" To which he responds, "Oh I did not say that...I do not allow men to fuck my wife!" OK now...that was one incident...Being a blessed man, I have been stopped in the middle of foreplay because, "I do not want that thing in my wife!" as he is fucking mine...That being said, I will pass this along to you AEGIS...you are right...Lots of people are stuck up...but it is simple...THIS LIFESTYLE IS ABOUT PLEASURE AND ENJOYMENT...therefore if someone DOES NOT want to meet you it is their choice...whether for coffee or anything else...NOT your choice...Also...IF more single men READ profiles, the relative hatred towards single men would go away...MOST couples have things in their profile saying what they do and do not want...YET it tends to be SINGLE MEN who send emails containing pics we do not want or bby the virtue of being that someone does not entertain single men and still gets an email from them...this demonstrates a lack of coutness on their part...Now...one question for you...Did the coupel in question have "no single men" in their profile? What does it say they are seaching for, does it include single men? if it does...well...I would assume they do not want to meet anyone new...if it includes disclaimers saying no single men...YOU are at fault...No single men means no single men...not no single men unless they are passing through town and want some coffee...
Again,.....my 2 cents...if it offends TS...
AEG you fucking crybaby. LOL JUST KIDDING Hey we will meet ya for coffee and or lunch but only if ya bring those signs so I can copy them. LOL gee AGE (you crybaby) when ya get to chicago if we are free ya freakin crybaby (LOL) look us up and if we are not real busy we will meet ya. Hell i will meet ya in a dark ally crybaby just to steal your signs. LOL
AEG hey i was once told this Joke them if they can't take a FUCK and Fuck them if they can't take a joke.
You are cool in my book and we would meet ya for lunch and some dessert after lunch (only if your paying) LOL Dont let it bother ya stay cool
TAZAM (SCOTT AND AUDRA)
AEG hey i was once told this Joke them if they can't take a FUCK and Fuck them if they can't take a joke.
You are cool in my book and we would meet ya for lunch and some dessert after lunch (only if your paying) LOL Dont let it bother ya stay cool
TAZAM (SCOTT AND AUDRA)
1.) Valence...if you ever get voted off of Survivor, drop us a line...
2.) Aegis...I just read your profile...I see another UH OH for a lot of men...you are listed as bi...again, somethign a lot of men are insecure about...
3.) Why is no one commenting about the fact that I think it is husbands/guys that are the reason behind all this...How many folks are ALL to happy to have a single female to entertain...buit NO SINGLE MALES...now...there is a reason that there is ALWAYS a girl on girl scene in EVERY porno, except the gay ones, IT IS EVERY MANS DREAM....ANyway...surprised no one made a comment about the men/husbands in this situation.
2.) Aegis...I just read your profile...I see another UH OH for a lot of men...you are listed as bi...again, somethign a lot of men are insecure about...
3.) Why is no one commenting about the fact that I think it is husbands/guys that are the reason behind all this...How many folks are ALL to happy to have a single female to entertain...buit NO SINGLE MALES...now...there is a reason that there is ALWAYS a girl on girl scene in EVERY porno, except the gay ones, IT IS EVERY MANS DREAM....ANyway...surprised no one made a comment about the men/husbands in this situation.
Hey Pal, it ain't just single men who have this kind of experience. This shit is harder than single dating, it seems. You have got to remember that a very large proportion of those on these sites are either not for real, have no intention of meeting anyone, or are not even who they say they are. Just the other day, a couple (so-called) who we had chatted with for weeks and indicated they were very excited about playing, said (when we suggested we meet for real) that we were incompatible. These are people who hit on us first and talked incessantly about meeting and playing. You ain't the Lone Ranger, my friend! We all hate it, but it is what it is.
Ok, I can not believe I am commenting in on this. But,I was in chat when this happened, and well, my only comment is the golden rule of swinging. "women have the ultimate veto power". She said no Aegis, you know the rules, be a man and move on. GRACEFULLY. Rejection is a part of life. Try and think of it this way. For every "no" you get in life, you are that much closer to getting a "yes". Play the odds.
Well I guess my $ .02 worth is to say that if you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen! that goes both ways. To the couple if you don't want to deliver the goods don't advertise it verbally regardless of your profile. Now to AEGIS...If you can't take rejection lower you expectations. and bravo on the suggestion to play the odds. DUDE play the odds
JSTJIM I too am bless I have mastered the art of a "cute way" of "Getting on and Getting off" sure makes up for having to walk to the bed on two legs instead of three. Never had a single complaint "EVER" GOD I LOVE JELLO
JSTJIM I too am bless I have mastered the art of a "cute way" of "Getting on and Getting off" sure makes up for having to walk to the bed on two legs instead of three. Never had a single complaint "EVER" GOD I LOVE JELLO
Ok Aegis to sum it up, some people are just fucking rude!!! It's part of life, it's part of the lifestyle.Sorry that you had an encounter with one(btw i heard who it was thru the grapevine and i think he's a jerk anyway)I have a couple that i'm playmates with that are out of the lifestyle as of last week because of someone rude. I myself had a "rude encounter" the other evening at a mardi gras party when i approached a young man with armful beads and was told, "sorry I'm saving them for later" gee my first thought was wtf? But I had a bunch already and really didn't need his and who knows maybe he needed them to get laid, lol So the moral to the aegis' fable is.....let it go. Looks like we all have to deal with these idiots from time to time and it seems we shouldn't waste anymore time dwelling on it because they're not even worth it! Let's just flip 'em off and walk away! lol Aegis, I hope that is not what has kept you from chat this past weekend, I missed you, and I hope you won't forget that it's our "TOPLESS MONDAY" in camchat!! woohoo!!!!! lol Hope to see you there my friend xox ~WW
P.S I hope I can get to valence before mrsh, she's such a tigress,I have a feeling she would rip him to shreds and there would be nothing left for me
P.S I hope I can get to valence before mrsh, she's such a tigress,I have a feeling she would rip him to shreds and there would be nothing left for me
"Now, I realize this is going to create yet another firestorm, and I will bet my next year's salary that some dumb-ass redneck-type will jump on me for "crying""
I've been waiting 5 days since this was posted for "Bubba" to open a can of whoop ass... or a "firestorm" and got neither one.
The only sure things are death and taxes.
I've been waiting 5 days since this was posted for "Bubba" to open a can of whoop ass... or a "firestorm" and got neither one.
The only sure things are death and taxes.
hhmmm well, i miss the 70's and the early 80's. jealousy and envy reign, no means no. well, if u dont want to be with me, i'll find someone that does. back then, there was no www.stuff.com and if u wanted to be with someone u met them. no sites, no ads. just hi face to face. so much for fake ads. or looking on the sites to find out they r a no show. or its so easy to just say not interested. at least face to face no is alot better to handle. and for the married people. she wanted to have fun she needed to find fun. but, then again it wasnt called swingin was it. so, i guess its just society and majority runs the world. strange world we live in. think about it................just my 2 cents worth.
Frankly we're fed up with all the solo male bashers as well. Nicely written email AEGIS3650, your statements were well said. Hat's off to you.
we play with single males not a problem here ... lol love to see her get a good fucking...but we just weed through the asses and try to find a decent guy to play with ..
First - I think some couples feel they need to be blunt because some people just don't take a polite hint. I saw nothing wrong with how the couple worded it. We all have busy lives and they probably just don't have the time to invest in something that isn't going to lead where they want to go.
Second - Yes, I believe that the husbands seem to be the ones that get jealous easier.
I am amazed at the double standard many will have. Its o.k. for them to have sex with someones wife or girlfriend, but you can't be with mine.
I think penis size and fitness is just as hard on our egos if not more so than women.
Women can be with someone easier based on emotional connection.
Because men are more visual, some think their spouce may become more interested in the other guy. Remember. Vaginas can feel relatively the same, but penis size can vary greatly.
A lover with a larger cock and abs of steel can be very intimidating to a man with an average cock and a littl paunch. Men tend to hide their feelings, but they are still there.
Thrid - I honestly think that the majority of males are within acceptable limits of social intellegence. Anyone who has been in the lifestyle any amount of time at all would have to be.
Assholes would or should get turned down so much that they should get discouraged and try other venues. I'm amazed at the number of idiots out there though. 10% jerk ratio is too high.
fourth- A SOLUTION!!!! If a man, woman or couple is just flagerantly bad about etiquet, then go ahead and forward their emails to the management of the site. If enough people complain, then they might be kicked out. When I see a wreckless driver on the road, I do my duty as a member of my community and report them to the police. Law inforcement may not pay attention to my complaint, but if 3 or more roll in they usually do.
I'm done.
Have a great week!
Scott
Second - Yes, I believe that the husbands seem to be the ones that get jealous easier.
I am amazed at the double standard many will have. Its o.k. for them to have sex with someones wife or girlfriend, but you can't be with mine.
I think penis size and fitness is just as hard on our egos if not more so than women.
Women can be with someone easier based on emotional connection.
Because men are more visual, some think their spouce may become more interested in the other guy. Remember. Vaginas can feel relatively the same, but penis size can vary greatly.
A lover with a larger cock and abs of steel can be very intimidating to a man with an average cock and a littl paunch. Men tend to hide their feelings, but they are still there.
Thrid - I honestly think that the majority of males are within acceptable limits of social intellegence. Anyone who has been in the lifestyle any amount of time at all would have to be.
Assholes would or should get turned down so much that they should get discouraged and try other venues. I'm amazed at the number of idiots out there though. 10% jerk ratio is too high.
fourth- A SOLUTION!!!! If a man, woman or couple is just flagerantly bad about etiquet, then go ahead and forward their emails to the management of the site. If enough people complain, then they might be kicked out. When I see a wreckless driver on the road, I do my duty as a member of my community and report them to the police. Law inforcement may not pay attention to my complaint, but if 3 or more roll in they usually do.
I'm done.
Have a great week!
Scott
Hey AEGIS we party with select single guys so its nothing against you as a single guy but man just get over it true they led you on in the chat room but NO means NO keep one thing in mind they said "not looking for anyone new at this time" Don't burn your bridges they left a open down the road or they would have said something harsher.
What happened to you is the exact reason we stay out of Chat rooms if we are attracted to someone we set up a meeting if they show they do if they don't they don't. To us there are too many who play mind games in chat rooms.
A good friend (cpl) we met in the lifestyle taught a very important lesson he suffered a heart attack at a very young age he was in a high stress job the dr. told him he sustained no heart damage his heart attack was due to STRESS!
Ever since that time he has learned to not sweat the small stuff and reminded us its all small stuff. He shared this with us a new way to look at life and this lifestyle.At the end of this post I will share his secret.
Don't burn your bridges we recently told a single guy who pissed us off to "lose our phone number" and he got all bent out of shape basically in his mind we no longer exist and (he really enjoyed playing with mrs. Ampussy) but he pissed me and eventually her off.
After he copped a attitude one thing we told him was we told you to "lose our number" then we told him we NEVER said we would lose his number NEVER burn bridges to us that cpl just told you not at this time they never said never!
O.K. here is the secret to revenge :LIVE a LONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG Happpppppppppppppppppppppy Liffffffffffffffffffffffffffffe.
Time to smile and do like we do just say Nexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxt
Norm&Sharon
What happened to you is the exact reason we stay out of Chat rooms if we are attracted to someone we set up a meeting if they show they do if they don't they don't. To us there are too many who play mind games in chat rooms.
A good friend (cpl) we met in the lifestyle taught a very important lesson he suffered a heart attack at a very young age he was in a high stress job the dr. told him he sustained no heart damage his heart attack was due to STRESS!
Ever since that time he has learned to not sweat the small stuff and reminded us its all small stuff. He shared this with us a new way to look at life and this lifestyle.At the end of this post I will share his secret.
Don't burn your bridges we recently told a single guy who pissed us off to "lose our phone number" and he got all bent out of shape basically in his mind we no longer exist and (he really enjoyed playing with mrs. Ampussy) but he pissed me and eventually her off.
After he copped a attitude one thing we told him was we told you to "lose our number" then we told him we NEVER said we would lose his number NEVER burn bridges to us that cpl just told you not at this time they never said never!
O.K. here is the secret to revenge :LIVE a LONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG Happpppppppppppppppppppppy Liffffffffffffffffffffffffffffe.
Time to smile and do like we do just say Nexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxt
Norm&Sharon
Great reply, AMPUSSY. Reminds me of one of my favorite quotes: It is not the events of our lives that matter. What matters is our reaction to them.
Welcome to the club. 1st of all there was nothing wrong of their response wording. I didn't find it rude by its self. However I think the point is that you spent a lot of time chatting with this couple and thought you had developed a friendship. This is where you feel you deserved better than a simple one liner decline for a local face to face.
I can't stress this enough welcome to the club. Not only are there plenty of couples, females and males on the web that are fake. (fake picture, fake bio, fake location) there are many more that have no intention at all of ever meeting. Sadly swinging forums like this are peppered with people that just get a thrill of being on a site like this. They will never have and most likely never will meet anyone.
Then you have your other groups of people that just have limited time. Perhaps they don't mind flirting online, but it's there that fantasy can rule. They perhaps would rather stick to something more comfortable in off line experiences. Or it could be they are only looking for something more than a one night stand.
There are many many flavors and motivations here. It's sad people can't be more honest about their intentions and desires, but it's human nature and the law of averages that creates these conflicts when people with different goals meet.
Sadly no amount of complaining or venting will change anything.
Just hang in there. Patience truely is key.
Chris
I can't stress this enough welcome to the club. Not only are there plenty of couples, females and males on the web that are fake. (fake picture, fake bio, fake location) there are many more that have no intention at all of ever meeting. Sadly swinging forums like this are peppered with people that just get a thrill of being on a site like this. They will never have and most likely never will meet anyone.
Then you have your other groups of people that just have limited time. Perhaps they don't mind flirting online, but it's there that fantasy can rule. They perhaps would rather stick to something more comfortable in off line experiences. Or it could be they are only looking for something more than a one night stand.
There are many many flavors and motivations here. It's sad people can't be more honest about their intentions and desires, but it's human nature and the law of averages that creates these conflicts when people with different goals meet.
Sadly no amount of complaining or venting will change anything.
Just hang in there. Patience truely is key.
Chris
I agree with alot of what's been said. It may not be anything negative towards you. It could simply be that this couple enjoys the play in the chatroom and on the webcam but really have no intention in meeting with a single male in real life even if it's just a social meeting.
I enjoy playing occasionally on the web cam and have had some very nice chats with some single males but really wouldn't have the desire to meet them in person even if it's nothing more than a drink or dinner. In most cases I'd rather leave it on line than in person in that situation. Of course there are aways the exceptions and we will meet with or play with a single male when the stars line up right.
We're very upfront about it so there shouldn't be any misunderstanding as to our intentions when it comes to that.
I guess if the other couple had asked you to look them up if you were ever in town I could see your point but if they never really offered the invitation and you felt that since you were in town they should meet you then they didn't do anything wrong with not wanting to meet in person. I don't know all the details so it's hard for me to really form an opinion about it.
In any event don't let it get to you. Rejection among other frustrating things is just a part of the lifestyle and you just have to try and keep a good attitude and move on.
T
I enjoy playing occasionally on the web cam and have had some very nice chats with some single males but really wouldn't have the desire to meet them in person even if it's nothing more than a drink or dinner. In most cases I'd rather leave it on line than in person in that situation. Of course there are aways the exceptions and we will meet with or play with a single male when the stars line up right.
We're very upfront about it so there shouldn't be any misunderstanding as to our intentions when it comes to that.
I guess if the other couple had asked you to look them up if you were ever in town I could see your point but if they never really offered the invitation and you felt that since you were in town they should meet you then they didn't do anything wrong with not wanting to meet in person. I don't know all the details so it's hard for me to really form an opinion about it.
In any event don't let it get to you. Rejection among other frustrating things is just a part of the lifestyle and you just have to try and keep a good attitude and move on.
T
A note I would add to all this is some guys think if you even return an email that your are interested in them and start getting pushy and inviting themselves and bombarding you with more unwanted emails. Guys, unless the couple or woman specifically asks YOU to meet them somewhere don't push it. We keep getting unwanted emails from guys long after we told them no thanks. Know when to back off.
Straightupnow you hit the Nail right on the head single guys back off if a cpl says NO then honor thier wishes and leave them alone ! Wehave told guys no and just because they accepted it so graciously and left us alone WE have contacted them back when they least expect it! Theres a TIP there for you single guys you will have better success when you reply with a thanks for the reply and then BACK OFF!
Norm&Sharon
Norm&Sharon
will probably open a