Whats the proper ettiquete for canceling plans with a couple? We recently met a couple that would make plans with us and then come up with every excuse to not meet. The excuses were sometimes over the top and just plain wrong. We finally had to stop talking to them when we invited them over for dinner.... they told us the entire week yes yes yes we are coming and then decided they werent going to come and blatantly told us they were doing something else after we spent money on dinner for them.... SO i ask how long do you speak to someone after they cancel on you?
3 strikes - you're OUT!
Anymore, if it is an encounter we really want to happen, we tend to only make "dates" with folks we've met before....otherwise, we meet for dinner somewhere..or dancing.. where if they don't show..no big deaL. We still get a night out.
We give usually give them a 2nd chance but not always.
Not many get second chances! Best story was the kid let the bird out the door on a winter day so had to go look during the 3 hour survival window and cancel lunch plans.. 15 mins notice.
Unless someone is dying we will always show up if we say we are going to meet just out of respect! We would give most people a second chance because life sometimes does get in the way but not after a second cancellation.
We usually try to make first meeting someplace like a restaurant. That way if no show we get a good dinner. We have had to cancel in the past and others have cancelled on us. The unforgivable is a no-show. We understand that kids will mess up plans at the last minute, and family is first. But, a quick phone call and not an email is expected and understood. Just try to be courteous to people we want to call friends.
Becoaus of my job, (being on call) I warn people in advance that we may not be able to make it, but I do let them know 24hrs in advance. We retire later this year so that will no longer be an issue. Hopefully we will get in more play time.
so far all we get are single guys that start off with "WANNA FUCK!" But we have met up with a fun couple. so far we havn't been canceled on but we have had to change plans for going to a get together because it's usually friday before i know my weekend schedule.
a second chance is definitely the last if you think they are worth it. what I think is more disrespectful is when you are about to meet and you get " my wife won't be able to make it" when we clearly said from the beginning we expect both of you because both of us will show. we have never flaked on anyone, when we say we will meet them because we find it disrespectful and if we were to not show we would definitely call before hand but only if it was a life and death situation. too many times people find the easy way out by canceling and not even facing those they cancelled on. If there was an extra button on the profile that showed what percentage of people they cancel on then it would save us a lot of trouble because by not showing up they would ruin their reputation and people would be cautious when they contacted a profile with a less than 100 score for showing up. maybe this is too harsh but this happens so much its ridiculous.
Cancelation is a tough one. There can be a good reason. I know it is a bummer. But if you have just found out that you have strep or a fever of 102 then I would just as soon have you cancel. I don
2nd chance is allowed if the cancellation is legit enough. after that, i'd rather look elsewhere.
i think the best excuse i ever heard was "well, my mom got cancer tonight so we're at the ER. in our halloween costumes"... next day i heard "hey. wanna play tonight? my mom got better, so we're cool now."
i think the best excuse i ever heard was "well, my mom got cancer tonight so we're at the ER. in our halloween costumes"... next day i heard "hey. wanna play tonight? my mom got better, so we're cool now."
I would move on and take things with a grain of salt. They are not worth your time and efforts!
Purely situational.
A polite and regrettable cancellation is what it is...once maybe.
A last minute cancellation...hmmm not real cool, but things happen.
A no-contact no-show...you're done! Beg for forgiveness and wait by your phone.
Finding out you lied to us...you better hope you're never on fire cuz I'll piss on the ground next to you!
It's simple really...no fakes, flakes, or mistakes. We can figure out the rest as we go. We're in no hurry, we won't push you, and we sure as hell won't lie to you!
Give us the same or move along.
A polite and regrettable cancellation is what it is...once maybe.
A last minute cancellation...hmmm not real cool, but things happen.
A no-contact no-show...you're done! Beg for forgiveness and wait by your phone.
Finding out you lied to us...you better hope you're never on fire cuz I'll piss on the ground next to you!
It's simple really...no fakes, flakes, or mistakes. We can figure out the rest as we go. We're in no hurry, we won't push you, and we sure as hell won't lie to you!
Give us the same or move along.
I have to say that it seems that our schedules seem to clash with him working 7 nights on and 7 nights off. Sometimes with a couple hour notice as of late he has been called in for a extra shift. But We personally if we say we will be there then we are. I have to agree that it depends on the couple. If it seems like a logical excuse then who are we to judge. If its not the truth it usually comes out. But after the second time we discuss if this venture is worth our time.
I agree with Pebblerock: It's simple really...no fakes, flakes, or mistakes. We can figure out the rest as we go. We're in no hurry, we won't push you, and we sure as hell won't lie to you!
I agree with Pebblerock: It's simple really...no fakes, flakes, or mistakes. We can figure out the rest as we go. We're in no hurry, we won't push you, and we sure as hell won't lie to you!
we've been on both ends of that... we have had to cancel and we have been cancelled on. it's perfectly fine with us if somebody needs to cancel. it happens. but the people who have stood us up without so much as even a simple apology and just leave us hanging... they suck!
We are for the most part if you cancel once we're not going to make a second date, thats simply because we have gotten burned by the same couple more than once. That being said there can be excepyions to the rule depending on circumstances.
Dam it. We had a no show last night!!
The other gal and the male here have been emailing like 75 times in the last 2 weeks trying to set things up. Lat night was at 8:30 was to be the time for an introductory meeting. They are newbies. Risky I know!
Possible hangups? Many!
Ok so they are late and we get an email that hubby got a flat and is running late. So we figure 30 min max. but little did we know she meant despite her plea for him not to ride his bike he went anyway and got a flat and no spare tube so had to walk to get cell coverage.. She had to go pick him up. No many emails so we still thought they would be showing ... At 1 hour we called it off. Sitting outside on hard metal chairs on your anniversary sucks! 1:15 min after meeting time we are home and finally get an Email explaining the flat bike tire deal. She is embarrassed and sorry. . What should we do?... Wife says no way Jose! unless they beg and show macho effort and full body and face pics!! At this point we have not seen a him pic they just sound fit and nice and we only have a bra shot and a workout suit pic of the headless wife? I figure the male just has some hangups and is going to be a anchor in all of this. AT this time we are waiting for them to make the next move..
The other gal and the male here have been emailing like 75 times in the last 2 weeks trying to set things up. Lat night was at 8:30 was to be the time for an introductory meeting. They are newbies. Risky I know!
Possible hangups? Many!
Ok so they are late and we get an email that hubby got a flat and is running late. So we figure 30 min max. but little did we know she meant despite her plea for him not to ride his bike he went anyway and got a flat and no spare tube so had to walk to get cell coverage.. She had to go pick him up. No many emails so we still thought they would be showing ... At 1 hour we called it off. Sitting outside on hard metal chairs on your anniversary sucks! 1:15 min after meeting time we are home and finally get an Email explaining the flat bike tire deal. She is embarrassed and sorry. . What should we do?... Wife says no way Jose! unless they beg and show macho effort and full body and face pics!! At this point we have not seen a him pic they just sound fit and nice and we only have a bra shot and a workout suit pic of the headless wife? I figure the male just has some hangups and is going to be a anchor in all of this. AT this time we are waiting for them to make the next move..
I was the bird story, and it was true unfortunately. I wouldn't have believed it if I was on the receiving end, either. I have lots of animals in the house, and stuff happens: escapes, medical, etc. That loss was avoidable, and it really hurt my feelings and my pocket. I was embarrassed to call you on that!
If I was going to lie to you, Maybemor, I'd have come up with a better one. I am a (non-fiction) writer and can do much better than a bird escaping in the dead of winter.
We've been on both ends of it. Sometimes things happen. And sometimes people just change their minds. We've received a few at the last day of hour; we even had reservations for one. Sometimes they freak out, or the guilt overrides the horniness. It's disappointing, but I don't find it offensive. We've given second chances before; it can work.
If I was going to lie to you, Maybemor, I'd have come up with a better one. I am a (non-fiction) writer and can do much better than a bird escaping in the dead of winter.
We've been on both ends of it. Sometimes things happen. And sometimes people just change their minds. We've received a few at the last day of hour; we even had reservations for one. Sometimes they freak out, or the guilt overrides the horniness. It's disappointing, but I don't find it offensive. We've given second chances before; it can work.
DELICIOUSLYWET wrote:
The problem with being flexible is selfish people will try and exploit your willingness to accommodate, so flexible people have to avoid being gullible. I re-learn that lesson every so often.
Wow, that sounds familiar, been there done that!
We have understand when things come up and people can't make it but its drives us crazy when people say they are coming and tell you up the last moment and totally flake out. Our rules usually Is if they can't have the common courtesy to send us a simple text or phone call and not let us know they aren't coming then we are usually done with them
We try to confirm our dates and engagements, but we're pretty spontaneous too. Still, we hate to be late and we won't stand someone up. It happens occasionally that we're late, but one of us would have to be bleeding or in the hospital for us to stand someone up. It's just common courtesy. If you make a date, show up and have fun. If you can't show, let the other party know as far in advance as you can. We've had last minute cancellations on us too. It's super inconvenient since we have so little time to play and can't always call up some other friend at the last minute. But it happens. Time is so precious to us that we won't waste someone else's and we ask the same courtesy. We are really forgiving the first time, not so forgiving the second time.