"And then he said, RECTUM??? Damn near killed killed em!!!" AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Photo courtesy of TRIXIEE.
Photo courtesy of TRIXIEE.
...
in honor of the upcoming NYE parties. 
heeheehee
heeheeheeand another for tomorrow
LOVE IT!
Hey, so it's not the TRADITIONAL New Years baby - sue me.
Hey, how'd they capture these stills of my husband changing his password? 
Tee-hee, this thread is about the only one he consistently reads on this forum -- I gotta feeling I'll be hearing about this later! 
Tee-hee, this thread is about the only one he consistently reads on this forum -- I gotta feeling I'll be hearing about this later! AZWETNWILD wrote:No I don't think so. I've seen two terms used here lately, one called "Glory Holes" and one called "Cock Blocking." I'm pretty sure this is about one of those. Or both.
is that what you call chocking your chicken?
I know, this isn't really a laugh. In fact it'll prolly 'cause vicarious pain if nothing else, but it just seemed to fit so well with CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL's last post about tattoos.
I received this from a man who wanted to meet me. Of course, once I read the inscription on his penis "It Wont Suck Itself," my vaj was all wet and my knees all wobbly, but somehow I managed to keep it under control and turn him away.
Notice the ink on the glans. I'm a girl so maybe I'm wrong, but ain't that gonna hurt??
I received this from a man who wanted to meet me. Of course, once I read the inscription on his penis "It Wont Suck Itself," my vaj was all wet and my knees all wobbly, but somehow I managed to keep it under control and turn him away.
Notice the ink on the glans. I'm a girl so maybe I'm wrong, but ain't that gonna hurt??
....
A woman was visiting her doctor for her annual checkup. As the doc was finishing the exam she replied that she had a question for him but was a little shy because it was of a sexual nature. He responded that he'd been her doctor for over 10yrs and that she need not be embarassed.
She explained that she found that she really enjoyed anal sex, but was concerned that if there could be any harm caused by it or if there were any other things she should be worried about.
The Dr. thought for a moment and replied that she shouldn't worry about anything other than getting pregnant.
The woman, a little shocked, said....PREGNANT??
To which the Dr. replied "where do you think LAWYERS come from?"
She explained that she found that she really enjoyed anal sex, but was concerned that if there could be any harm caused by it or if there were any other things she should be worried about.
The Dr. thought for a moment and replied that she shouldn't worry about anything other than getting pregnant.
The woman, a little shocked, said....PREGNANT??
To which the Dr. replied "where do you think LAWYERS come from?"
FUN4MWF wrote:
I know, this isn't really a laugh. In fact it'll prolly 'cause vicarious pain if nothing else, but it just seemed to fit so well with CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL's last post about tattoos.
I received this from a man who wanted to meet me. Of course, once I read the inscription on his penis "It Wont Suck Itself," my vaj was all wet and my knees all wobbly, but somehow I managed to keep it under control and turn him away.
Notice the ink on the glans. I'm a girl so maybe I'm wrong, but ain't that gonna hurt??
I don't know if it would hurt and I don't WANT to know.
Guy walks into a cat house, and pays the madam his $25.00.
Madam says, "OK, but I need to know how big you are so I know which girl to give you".
Guy says, "Well, I have a tatoo on it that says SHORTY".
"OK", says the madam, "top of the stairs, first door on the left".
With that, the guy heads up the stairs - about 1/2 hour later, he comes back down, nods to the madam and walks out.
About this time, the madam hears a noise upstairs and turns to look.
At the top of the stairs, she can see the girl crawling out of her room - and in REALLY BAD shape.
The madam runs up the stairs, kneels down, cradles the girl's head in her hands and asks, "what's wrong"?
The girl, just barely able to speak says, "I have never seen a guy that hung in all my life".
"I don't understand", says the madam - "he told me he has SHORTY tatooed on it".
"Yeah", says the girl, "but when it gets hard, it says SHORTY'S BAR AND GRILLE PUNXSUTAWNEY, PENNSYLVANIA.
.......
I will agree 100%............
...
thepenisinhermouth
ok how many read the penis is in her mouth
correct answer the pen is in her mouth
ok how many read the penis is in her mouth
correct answer the pen is in her mouth
why cant a you start a diet with make up on?
because you cant eat jenny craig if mary kay is already on your face.
because you cant eat jenny craig if mary kay is already on your face.
Oh My God its you LMAO
WATTSWW wrote:
What is wrong with his arm?
SIMPLEPLEASURES wrote:
What is wrong with his arm?
Maybe too much cyber-sexing with unsuspecting SM
, lolHomer!
If I were your uncle Jack on an elephant, would you help your uncle Jack off an elephant?
I need something like this for when I take hubby shopping with me.
I just thought this might be a nice ice-breaker game for a summertime party?
Fitting?
PALS4FUN wrote:
Fitting?
Amen
I think this is what they call a Gownless Evening Strap.
CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL wrote:
I think this is what they call a Gownless Evening Strap.
And look at the big smile on that guys face. I hate her!
Local authorities today arrested Jason Smith also known as Darcy Darcy. Smith is a transexual who lives fulltime as a woman. The police department charged Smith with male fraud.
Mav
Mav
Hey, this is kinda like meeting some of those folks whos' profiles don't match reality! 
PALS4FUN wrote:That is funny! Thanks
PALS4FUN wrote:
OMG that's funny!
Gives new meaning to the term "Dictation!"
PALS4FUN wrote:Yes it does
Gives new meaning to the term "Dictation!"
an Amish boy asks his father for the horse and buggy for a date that night.
His father says yes but be in around 10 pm.
The boy cries out 10 pm but i am 21 i should be able to stay out latter than that.
to which the father said "Yes you are, son. And yes you can. But the field needs to be plowed in the morning and the horse needs his rest before he goes to work."
His father says yes but be in around 10 pm.
The boy cries out 10 pm but i am 21 i should be able to stay out latter than that.
to which the father said "Yes you are, son. And yes you can. But the field needs to be plowed in the morning and the horse needs his rest before he goes to work."
Quote of the day:........ Sex is the best thing to wake up to: unless ur in prison
Some people just need a free sandwich!
Judging from the forum topics lately, perhaps some folks would fall for this pickup line?
This could get me in trouble..LOL Scott
Lets see. Beer-check. Gun-Check. Likely deer area-check. Pickup truck is likely nearby, so he's pretty much good to go.
You just cant take him anywhere!
Can't blame him...
How do you catch the interest of a lesbian?
Don't be a dick.
Don't be a dick.
Why can't a lesbian be on a diet and have make up on at the same time?
Well you can't be eating Jenny Craig if you have Mary Key3 on your face
Well you can't be eating Jenny Craig if you have Mary Key3 on your face
A man is riding aimlessly through the desert on a donkey. He is not hungry or thirsty, because he has a bottomless bowl of fruit. He wanders for about a week and eventually gets pretty horny. He gets to the point where he can't stand it anymore.
So he decides to try and have sex with the donkey.
He drops his pants and positions himself behind the donkey. But, to his dismay, the donkey walks away.
Only slightly discouraged, the man decides to try again. He walks to where the donkey is standing, positions himself behind the donkey, and right before he goes for it, the donkey walks away again. Now the man is getting frustrated.
As he prepares for his third and final try, he sees a vision. A beautiful, naked woman appears out of nowhere. She approaches the stunned man, who until recently, believed that he was the only person for hundreds of miles.
She smiles at him and says, "I would do anything for that bowl of fruit you have."
"Anything?" he says, getting fairly excited.
"Yes, anything." she replies.
So he says, "Will you hold the donkey?"
So he decides to try and have sex with the donkey.
He drops his pants and positions himself behind the donkey. But, to his dismay, the donkey walks away.
Only slightly discouraged, the man decides to try again. He walks to where the donkey is standing, positions himself behind the donkey, and right before he goes for it, the donkey walks away again. Now the man is getting frustrated.
As he prepares for his third and final try, he sees a vision. A beautiful, naked woman appears out of nowhere. She approaches the stunned man, who until recently, believed that he was the only person for hundreds of miles.
She smiles at him and says, "I would do anything for that bowl of fruit you have."
"Anything?" he says, getting fairly excited.
"Yes, anything." she replies.
So he says, "Will you hold the donkey?"
Ya know, I REALLY need someone to take me up on this one!
PALS4FUN wrote:
Ya know, I REALLY need someone to take me up on this one!
I'm down for taking you up
I'm sure quite a few other males would be as well.JEFFSMITH1972 wrote:PALS4FUN wrote:
Ya know, I REALLY need someone to take me up on this one!
I'm down for taking you up
LOL, yeah, but where's the damn couples? Damn it, I'm supposed to be exploring my bi-curiosity!! All I find is some gal saying "Here, let me sit on your face while you explore your bi-curiosity," or the opposite -- some kinda run-around! Sheez, where's the "in-between" folks?
PALS4FUN wrote:JEFFSMITH1972 wrote:
[quote=PALS4FUN]Ya know, I REALLY need someone to take me up on this one!
I'm down for taking you up
LOL, yeah, but where's the damn couples? Damn it, I'm supposed to be exploring my bi-curiosity!! All I find is some gal saying "Here, let me sit on your face while you explore your bi-curiosity," or the opposite -- some kinda run-around! Sheez, where's the "in-between" folks?
[/quote]I think you need to remove the SM part on your profile while you're focusing on women, it'll help keep us males at bay. If I were a girl I'd gladly let you explore, but alas, that is a penis, and not a vagina.
JEFFSMITH1972 wrote:Ha! Good point! It's done!
I think you need to remove the SM part on your profile while you're focusing on women, it'll help keep us males at bay. If I were a girl I'd gladly let you explore, but alas, that is a penis, and not a vagina.
I guess I've not really messed with all those settings up at the top of the profile in awhile so didn't even think about that!:-) This is a great conversation. I don't need to say a thing. LOL it's all being said. What woman in her right mind wouldn't want to play 100% with you PALS4FUN.... I'm just saying. :-)
PALS4FUN wrote:JEFFSMITH1972 wrote:
[quote=PALS4FUN]Ya know, I REALLY need someone to take me up on this one!
I'm down for taking you up
LOL, yeah, but where's the damn couples? Damn it, I'm supposed to be exploring my bi-curiosity!! All I find is some gal saying "Here, let me sit on your face while you explore your bi-curiosity," or the opposite -- some kinda run-around! Sheez, where's the "in-between" folks?
[/quote]Well if you're looking for a couple, we're a couple! I knew she was gonna make this better for me...
BABYBULL wrote:LOL, you're too sweet, Babybull! And it might work out that way. All I'm sayin' is that there can be such a thing as too much too soon, ya know? Kinda like this Kitty surfin' the kitty porn has found out!
:-) This is a great conversation. I don't need to say a thing. LOL it's all being said. What woman in her right mind wouldn't want to play 100% with you PALS4FUN.... I'm just saying. :-)
LMFAO. You're killin me girl!!! People could get Hi off Smoking your brain. You come up with some of the funniest shit. Luv ya Sweetness. Happy Valentines Day to you. :-)
BABYBULL wrote:Ha, usually folks just say that the way my brain operates makes it seem like I'm Hi! Happy V-Day to you too (well, almost belatedly now, but happy post V-day?!)
LMFAO. You're killin me girl!!! People could get Hi off Smoking your brain. You come up with some of the funniest shit. Luv ya Sweetness. Happy Valentines Day to you. :-)
PALS4FUN wrote:BABYBULL wrote:Ha, usually folks just say that the way my brain operates makes it seem like I'm Hi! Happy V-Day to you too (well, almost belatedly now, but happy post V-day?!)
LMFAO. You're killin me girl!!! People could get Hi off Smoking your brain. You come up with some of the funniest shit. Luv ya Sweetness. Happy Valentines Day to you. :-)
No, now it's a happy post V-day. And a happy post V-day to everyone! YAY!
Well, I suppose it was inevitable - what started out and was intended to be strictly a "JOKE" thread seems to have turned into a BREAKER BREAKER 19 CB Radio communication thread. lol
I can start a new DAILY CHUCKLES if ya'll need this one to converse.
I can start a new DAILY CHUCKLES if ya'll need this one to converse.
CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL wrote:Hey, I thought the cats were pretty funny. To each his own, I suppose. So where's your joke? Or are you just trying to "bump" your own thread?CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL wrote:
Well, I suppose it was inevitable - what started out and was intended to be strictly a "JOKE" thread seems to have turned into a BREAKER BREAKER 19 CB Radio communication thread. lol
I can start a new DAILY CHUCKLES if ya'll need this one to converse.
CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL wrote:
Well, I suppose it was inevitable - what started out and was intended to be strictly a "JOKE" thread seems to have turned into a BREAKER BREAKER 19 CB Radio communication thread. lol
I can start a new DAILY CHUCKLES if ya'll need this one to converse.
You need a way to have breakoff chains, kind of like in some forums, where it goes
A
1
2
B
1
2
3
Etc. thoughts?
Or maybe there should be an optional link for "start your own thread based on this comment over yonder" ? No, PALS, I would have no reason to "bump" my own thread.
I'm not that starved for attention.
And I think if you look back far enough, you'll see how long it's been since I initiated the "DAILY CHUCKLES" thread - and how much I've contributed to it.
And yes, the Kitty Porn was hilarious - perfectly in line with the spirit of things.
Thanks for posting it here.
I'm not that starved for attention.
And I think if you look back far enough, you'll see how long it's been since I initiated the "DAILY CHUCKLES" thread - and how much I've contributed to it.
And yes, the Kitty Porn was hilarious - perfectly in line with the spirit of things.
Thanks for posting it here.