Dr. Ziggy...
How would someone approach a couple in a vanilla bar if you suspect (or know from a reliable source) that they are swingers? (And the wife/gf seems to be quite friently.)
How would someone approach a couple in a vanilla bar if you suspect (or know from a reliable source) that they are swingers? (And the wife/gf seems to be quite friently.)
In my experience, try to ask an innocent question, as in, 'Have you ben to *insert name of local swing club*?'
Say "Hi, how are you two doing tonight"
Seems to work for breaking the ice for us.
Seems to work for breaking the ice for us.
@JSTJIM72 -- I thought of that, but didn't have reply if they had said 'no' 
(And if they said "yes" -oops, then what do I say! LOL!)
@T4REAL69 - Huh? What typos?
@Darknladyjedi - Sounds good. So, 'Hi, how are you two doing tonight"
(And if they said "yes" -oops, then what do I say! LOL!)@T4REAL69 - Huh? What typos?
@Darknladyjedi - Sounds good. So, 'Hi, how are you two doing tonight"
IF they say no, say neither have I, but have heard good things.
If they say yes, explain how much you enjoy it because of _______________.
Saying hello and how are you doing tonight opens the door to discussion, however, if the goal is to ascertain lifestyle participation or not, it won't accomplish that.
If they say yes, explain how much you enjoy it because of _______________.
Saying hello and how are you doing tonight opens the door to discussion, however, if the goal is to ascertain lifestyle participation or not, it won't accomplish that.
@JSTJIM72 - OK - so if they say 'no' - just how would you explain a swingers type of bar / club to someone who's vanilla? If it was you, and you were approached in a vanilla bar, how would the converastion go?
It could go something like this......: BTW sentences enclosed in brackets are the "vanilla" couples responses. Oh, and you really don't know them so if they are offended by the term swingers or that you should think you saw them there...... Who cares.... and if they respond positively .....maybe you've made some friends.
Here we go.... Walking up to the couple:
Hi! How are you? Haven't seen you at ___________ lately...Everything OK? (no we haven't been there) You haven't been there..???? I'm sorry, but you have twins. (What's ________________ ?) Oh it's a club we go to from time to time.. It's supposed to be a "swinger's" club or dance.... Pretty risque` but a lot of nice people there and can be pretty sexy at times. Basically it's a dance but you never know what you might see and pretty open adult. Not like a regular bar where everyone is trying to put on airs....Just regular people who are having fun.... But I could have sworn that you guys look just like this other couple. Sorry to have bothered you. Hey, would you like to go sometime? Next week they're having a dance.... (We'd have to think about that...What if we ran into one of our neighbors...what would we do?) Well, to start with say hi and be friendly..... let them know you came because a friend said it was a nice dance and some great people......
So you've made contact, they came to the dance and maybe you guys hookup or maybe you just became sexy friends....
Here we go.... Walking up to the couple:
Hi! How are you? Haven't seen you at ___________ lately...Everything OK? (no we haven't been there) You haven't been there..???? I'm sorry, but you have twins. (What's ________________ ?) Oh it's a club we go to from time to time.. It's supposed to be a "swinger's" club or dance.... Pretty risque` but a lot of nice people there and can be pretty sexy at times. Basically it's a dance but you never know what you might see and pretty open adult. Not like a regular bar where everyone is trying to put on airs....Just regular people who are having fun.... But I could have sworn that you guys look just like this other couple. Sorry to have bothered you. Hey, would you like to go sometime? Next week they're having a dance.... (We'd have to think about that...What if we ran into one of our neighbors...what would we do?) Well, to start with say hi and be friendly..... let them know you came because a friend said it was a nice dance and some great people......
So you've made contact, they came to the dance and maybe you guys hookup or maybe you just became sexy friends....