Swingers Forum - Having a hard time meeting people

Posting some kind of profile pic will help immensely...

1) You've been on the site for three years and are not validated.
2) You have no public pictures.
3) Your profile basically reads as if all you are interested in a single females but you will suck it up and take a couple if you have to in order to get at the female.

Honestly, I look at your profile and it looks like either you are a fake or a picture collector. Get some pictures out in public, they don't have to be nude or show your faces. Get validated, 3 years and unvalidated looks very suspicious at least to me. Profile isn't all that bad but you might want to lose the extremely heavy push for a single female or just remove couples form the profile and go that way.

WOW !!! first of all let me start by saying I did have pics up for a long time and that didnt have any affect, thats why we made them private.
Also,my comment in our profile about the life simply meet, I dont like it when people say that to us. It is not a way we live, it is fun we have on the side. I wouldn't refer to that a slumming!
Definitely, not here to take 1 for the team or I would have done that already. What we ment by that was we like g/g but r will to go further with the right couple. As far as getting validated i thought u had to meet someone on this site be4 that could happen?

SWEETTEE46 wrote:

WOW !!! first of all let me start by saying I did have pics up for a long time and that didnt have any affect, thats why we made them private.
Also,my comment in our profile about the life simply meet, I dont like it when people say that to us. It is not a way we live, it is fun we have on the side. I wouldn't refer to that a slumming!
Definitely, not here to take 1 for the team or I would have done that already. What we ment by that was we like g/g but r will to go further with the right couple. As far as getting validated i thought u had to meet someone on this site be4 that could happen?

I think most folks were just giving you an opinion as to how they perceived your profile. What is more important, what you meant to say in your profile, or what others perceive you're saying? I'd say the later. Ya might fiddle with it some? Are you getting offers to meet? It's totally OK to be soft swap or occasional swap or whatever but, yeah, you're going to filter out a LOT of people on here who are really hard-core. But so what? Have you met ANYONE in the 3 years you've been here? If you haven't, are you POSITIVE that you're not looking for Ken and Barbie while you're just the couple next door?
(I always claim to be a Goddess on here, but Matthew McConaughey still hasn't called!)

I think my own profile is kinda negative right now -- hopefully in a tad bit of a funny way. But I've gotten so tired of hearing from the male half of couples trying to cheat on their spouse or trade her off. I've found single-guys to be more straight up (hey, a pun, if you're dirty-minded enough!). But I don't know, there's always loads of crap to sort through before finding the gems. But yeah, ya outa at least have found a topaz by now.

Personally, I like your profile. Clear. Concise. To the point. You know what you are looking for and are asking for it. It just leads me to a few questions.

1. Why is the female listed as on bi-curious? No experience? If so, you might want to venture further into your description saying you are looking for a select woman willing to take the lead and teach her about girl on girl lovemaking. (heck, I hot all hot and bothered just writing that). Is your female experienced? If so, is she genuinely bi sexual or just bi comfortable. Your profile is pretty adamant about want girl on girl play so make what YOUR girl has to offer stand out.

2. Pictures. You do need them. Not sure what's on your private album, but you need to have a good pic of you both. I subscribe to the whole if you are adult enough to wanna be on a swing site you are adult enough to own it and show your face. So...capture a fun pic of you BOTH and use it as your profile pic. You can keep it G-rated. Or not. Up to you. Just follow Swingular's TOS rules to posting pics.

Also, it there are local events in your area....GO! It's ok to meet in public and get to know people. Get yourselves seen and heard. Make a statement. That will increase your chances of meeting the type of people you will eventually want to play with. Remember, while not every person is a potential playmate, someone they might know and introduce you too could be. So don't burn bridges.

Happy Lusting. It will happen.

xox
Tammy

As far as the getting validated (since it was brought up and I don't see it answered yet) there are a couple ways to do that, you can do it in chat with a VIP and a webcam, you can do it with admin through yahoo IM or you can meet a VIP person in person and they can validate you. It is very easily done so there really is no reason someone can't become validated within days of getting a membership...

BLUEEYESINUTAH wrote:

... I subscribe to the whole if you are adult enough to wanna be on a swing site you are adult enough to own it and show your face. ...
Tammy

I CAN NOT believe you brought that up here, and made it some weird Adult vs Juvenile issue.

I, the Mr, don't typically deal with any email on here. But I do know that the Mrs doesn't respond to emails from folks without pics. But it's JUST a choice, NOT a judgement. However, we do NOT have face pics in the public area.

I made the mistake of pointing out some of my boss's errors a while back. He's pissed. I'm an "at-will" worker who holds a license REQUIRED for my job. If a client lets my boss know I've got an account on here? Both my contract and my license are in jepardy. Both allow termination for illegal/immoral acts. Adultry is illegal in Utah. Will they enforce it? Maybe not. Would my boss threaten to turn me in to the licensing bureau and make a circus show out of it if I don't quit? Probably. Either way, I've got no job, no unemployment benefits, and no means of supporting my family. Burger King, here I come. I hope you have 3 spare bedrooms for my family.

In your words:
"if you are ADULT enough to wanna be on a swing site you are ADULT enough to own it and show your face."

If you're walking barefoot through a cow pasture and you step on something smushy, smell something foul, look down and see brown goo oozing up between your toes, you probably just stepped in bullshit. Try not to sling too much of it around, K?


P.S. BlueEyes, you are an attractive lady who obviously has no such concerns so yes, that makes it WAY easier for you to meet people with your sexy profile pic. That's a huge advantage, I agree. But the judgement bit? Really? (Trying to soften-up this post--The Mrs says I come-off like a big asshole on here. but hey, honesty is really valued here, right?!?! LOL)

I also have family members who work for the police department, have high positions in their particular church offices, and also had a job where I could of been fired for anything. However, I still feel that to hide things is to insinuate that I'm ashamed/guilty/etc for things. I am who I am.

There are people on this site that are in my local LDS church ward, work at my STBX's job, and ironically, who I am related to. I would of never known except for the face pics. Not my place to out anyone. And if someone should out you or throw you under a bus like that, well you have just cause for stalking them, slashing their tires, pouring battery acid on their lawn, and giving their names, birthdays, and addresses to such organizations such as "People For the Acceptance of Beastiality", christian missionaries, and Amway.

I have a 6 bedroom house with 4 kids, 3 adults, and 1 dog. If you guys move in we can have our own reality show and viola....money issues taken care of.

In all seriousness tho, I said *I* subscribe to it. I didn't propose that Swingular makes it part of their TOS. Ironically being honest about it makes me able to avoid the cow pasture and not have to worry about stepping into something.

I'm also terrified of cows. I avoid those damn creatures anyway I can.

BLUEEYESINUTAH wrote:

I also have family members who work for the police department, have high positions in their particular church offices, and also had a job where I could of been fired for anything. However, I still feel that to hide things is to insinuate that I'm ashamed/guilty/etc for things. I am who I am.
I'm also terrified of cows. I avoid those damn creatures anyway I can.

Your rationales are entirely based on pride or other emotional reasons ..... NOT the actual livelihood of your family. It's NOT the same.

And I think we stole someones topic didn't we? LOL, Sorry Sweetee46!! But at least we're keeping you on the main page and shortly someone will ignore BlueEyes and I and throw some more advice your way!!!

But one more thing BlueEyes -- You're in our friends list! LOL I knew that I recognized you from somewhere! (Damn, I'm thinkin' to myself, is that the neighbor?) Boy, You'll accept just ANYONE for a Swingular friend won't you?!!!

FUN4MWF wrote:

But one more thing BlueEyes -- You're in our friends list! LOL I knew that I recognized you from somewhere! (Damn, I'm thinkin' to myself, is that the neighbor?) Boy, You'll accept just ANYONE for a Swingular friend won't you?!!!

hee hee. Try telling that to the 52 people in FR que hell I'm not answering. I'm evil. And for the record, I'm the one that sent you two the friend's request. You're beautiful wife accepted within minutes. It's her fault.

BADGIRL8P you sound like u r pretty full of yourself.

FUN4MWF yes we have meet people just NONE from this site.

SWEETTEE46, after all that has been said thus far, this is what I see...this is a swinging site and by definition, swinging means couples swapping with other couples, not so?...so, here's where things get tricky...a single man is accepted on this site PARTLY because some couples want single men...but, I do believe that single men have it the hardest because they are mostly looked at as in search of as much pussy as possible (which is probably true in most cases) and, it doesn't seem fair to the masses...so, did you see the 'Certified Single Male' thread about single men ettiquette?...lol...it started out as some of the members here wanting rules and regulations for single men only (how fair is that?)...now, from some of the posts in this thread, it now seems that couples who seek single women are just as outcasted as the single men here...so, are they saying it's okay to be a couple who seek single men but, not ok to be a couple that seeks single women?...I have pondered that on a few occcasions...some couples don't want to hear that you are only looking for women, not so?...on ther other hand, some will say, "good luck, hope you guys find what you seek "...and some may say, "call us when you are ready for couples "...no harm, no foul...I really don't think that everyone reads the profiles very carefully or maybe its just that all of our perceptions are terrible...we have put "no couples" in our profile but, we constantly get offers...although VERY flattering, we are not to that point as of yet...our ignorance of the lifestyle has hurt us as well...we have offended and have been offended by many here because we hadn't done our "due diligence" in researching this lifestyle...being told to leave this site and find single girls at a local bar/club is one of our best examples...I have nothing against anyone here or anywhere...I have never intentionally offended anyone as I hope I am not now...so, for the record, believe it or not, I do not think it is fair to play with someone's other half if you are not willing to share your own (not directed towards anyone, just a personal belief)

Chocol8ee, KUDOS WELL PUT!!!We have also been told to go look in clubs..LOL in prior comments to yours on this post. Lifestyle???? Him does not everyone in the world live a differnt livestyle I am so sure that no 2 diffent house hold live the same, similar yes that same no! Who am I or anyone on this site or any place to judge any1. I have my opion yes but, to tell some to post a pic (when i send an email or reply I always attach a pic) or go to another site because they dont like your so called lifestyle is messed up. People reserve the right to have privacy for what ever reason in there life. Judgemental should we say. The infamous unicorn is ofcorase ideal in many cases, but to want to explore beyond that is also great. I personal do not care to learn about the swingers lifestyle if it is being shallow to others. It seem to me that even though swingers everyones lifestyle is still different cuz we have differnt wants, needs, or coursesites.We just have similar interest puting us in a swingers click so to say.

ALINEEDISU wrote:

Well I for one and a sucker for grammar, punctuation, and spelling. Nothing turns me on more then a coherent sentence. Maybe I am shallow.

+1!!! Maybe it makes me a snob, but if there are countless grammar and spelling mistakes in a profile, I normally don't even bother. No excuses - that's what spell check is for, people! Your profile is kind of imperative to meeting people.. double-check and read it over to yourself.

I too, don't usually look at a profile or accept a friend request unless there is at least one picture of each member of the couple. We've been fooled one too many times by people lying about their ages and looks. Fool me once..

Wow this is stupid! All of you are being rude in some degree to me! (Dave) Everyone is talking about pics and blah blah blah. I think you should be honest and state what you want or are looking for on this site. Right? We are all looking for something here! Hello! Pics do help yes to some degree but we have been on this site for a while and are not verified, whatever the fuck that means! And meeet more people than most of you lie about. All I am saying is go easy and help others have the same great experiences we have all had and let them find them in there own way! Happy Hunting.Lmao!

ALINEEDISU wrote:

Well I for one and a sucker for grammar, punctuation, and spelling. Nothing turns me on more then a coherent sentence. Maybe I am shallow.

Well, just as an outside observer, I'd have to say, if you're going to be a sucker for grammar, punctuation and spelling, it would probably be a good idea to use "am" instead of "and" in your first sentence - and there's a VAST difference between the words "then" and "than" as used in your second sentence; each has a proper place and use in correct and coherent sentence structure.


Just sayin'.......

yawn

Yes it is hard to conenct with people on here. Some say we will talk to anyone and when you send them a note the never give a reply.

ICONRED wrote:

4) My wife and I are parents. We don't flaunt around wearing shear material, dancing to harp music, drinking wine all day only to end upon a 100-person orgy in some Italian villa. We live in a house with four walls, we drive a vehicle that needs an oil change and laundry currently needs to be done here. I am artist whose work you may have very well seen published in some place... you may even have it hanging on your home. My point is that just because someone makes reference to the "lifestyle" doesn't mean they're chin-deep in it 24/7.

Dammit, I was looking forward to the 100-person orgy in the Italian style villa!

NICKIGIRL wrote:

CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL wrote:

[quote=ALINEEDISU]Well I for one and a sucker for grammar, punctuation, and spelling. Nothing turns me on more then a coherent sentence. Maybe I am shallow.

Well, just as an outside observer, I'd have to say, if you're going to be a sucker for grammar, punctuation and spelling, it would probably be a good idea to use "am" instead of "and" in your first sentence - and there's a VAST difference between the words "then" and "than" as used in your second sentence; each has a proper place and use in correct and coherent sentence structure. Just sayin'.......[/quote Should you really be correcting anyone when you use butt instead of but in every post you make.

I do?
EVERY post???

Please point it out in this one - I'm having trouble finding it.

CARRIERMAN wrote:

NICKIGIRL wrote:

[quote=CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL]... Well, just as an outside observer, I'd have to say, if you're going to be a sucker for grammar, punctuation and spelling, it would probably be a good idea to use "am" instead of "and" in your first sentence - and there's a VAST difference between the words "then" and "than" as used in your second sentence; each has a proper place and use in correct and coherent sentence structure. Just sayin'.......[/quote Should you really be correcting anyone when you use butt instead of but in every post you make.

I do?
EVERY post??? Butt that's just not true.

Please point it out in this one - I'm having trouble finding it.

See, See, It's right there after the triple question mark.

FUN4MWF wrote:

CARRIERMAN wrote:

[quote=NICKIGIRL][quote=CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL]... Well, just as an outside observer, I'd have to say, if you're going to be a sucker for grammar, punctuation and spelling, it would probably be a good idea to use "am" instead of "and" in your first sentence - and there's a VAST difference between the words "then" and "than" as used in your second sentence; each has a proper place and use in correct and coherent sentence structure. Just sayin'.......[/quote Should you really be correcting anyone when you use butt instead of but in every post you make.

I do? EVERY post??? Butt that's just not true. Please point it out in this one - I'm having trouble finding it.

See, See, It's right there after the triple question mark. [/quote]

Isn't it neat when someone can alter a post to make it appear the original poster posted it that way?
Kinda brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?

ARHGGGGGG. Unmasked by the Hulkster.

CARRIERMAN wrote:

Well, "so far" no one has tried to crucify me for the CHUCKLES thread.

Not you. Just someone else. *straight face*