Worst/funniest pick up lines. I'll start.
"Does this smell like chloroform?"
"Does this smell like chloroform?"
Wanna fuck or should I apologize?
Do you take it in the butt on the first date!
1 wanna know what i learned in prison
2 hey how do you look in a sheep suit
2 hey how do you look in a sheep suit
I love girl juice and sausage for breakfast!
(shhh, I really do)
(shhh, I really do)
Do you believe in love at first site, or should I walk by again?
I seem to have lost my phone number can i have yours????
Would you like to have breakfast?
What time would you like me to nudge you?
What time would you like me to nudge you?
Want to go to Starbucks and/or Sushi? (works every time)
Seriously, I don't think people really use lines on me. I'm kinda the approachable girl next door and totally put out a "safe friendly" vibe in person. (Must be that "deer in headlights" look I have on my face all the time. LOL)
But my all time FAVORITE line used was during halloween at a meet and greet at Northern Exposure and Charles walked up to me wearing all black leather trench coat and a string of white lights and with a totally straight face asked..."hey can I flash you?" and promptly opened his coat and his light string started flickering. That was the beginning of our fun friendship.
I'm interested in hearing what lines women can use that would work (on either gender). I'm sadly lacking in the flirting/picking people up department. Eventually I'm hoping I'm able to fix that. Maybe. I think I would be freaked if it actually worked. LMAO.
Seriously, I don't think people really use lines on me. I'm kinda the approachable girl next door and totally put out a "safe friendly" vibe in person. (Must be that "deer in headlights" look I have on my face all the time. LOL)
But my all time FAVORITE line used was during halloween at a meet and greet at Northern Exposure and Charles walked up to me wearing all black leather trench coat and a string of white lights and with a totally straight face asked..."hey can I flash you?" and promptly opened his coat and his light string started flickering. That was the beginning of our fun friendship.
I'm interested in hearing what lines women can use that would work (on either gender). I'm sadly lacking in the flirting/picking people up department. Eventually I'm hoping I'm able to fix that. Maybe. I think I would be freaked if it actually worked. LMAO.
Have you got a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.
Worst?
Wanna Wrestle?
I laughed at him and walked away.
I dont remember who said this one to me but it was just a week or so ago.
How much does a polar bear weigh?
I knew this one and finished the line for them "enough to break the ice"
Wanna Wrestle?
I laughed at him and walked away.
I dont remember who said this one to me but it was just a week or so ago.
How much does a polar bear weigh?
I knew this one and finished the line for them "enough to break the ice"
My favorite was overheard when I walked by a club called UC in gainesville, fl. An either straight or bisexual guy was attempting to pick up a lesbian and used the line "Come on baby! If I put a condom on, it will feel just like a dildo!" My friends and I hit the ground laughing!!
CUPL43SOME wrote:
My favorite was overheard when I walked by a club called UC in gainesville, fl. An either straight or bisexual guy was attempting to pick up a lesbian and used the line "Come on baby! If I put a condom on, it will feel just like a dildo!" My friends and I hit the ground laughing!!
That is priceless...I'm still laughing!
"Are those Space jeans? "Cause that ass is outa this world.."
CUPL43SOME wrote:
My favorite was overheard when I walked by a club called UC in gainesville, fl. An either straight or bisexual guy was attempting to pick up a lesbian and used the line "Come on baby! If I put a condom on, it will feel just like a dildo!" My friends and I hit the ground laughing!!
ROFLMAO.
Thank you. I so needed that.
xox
Tammy
Want to fuck and eat pizza? NO? Whats the matter, you don't like pizza?
Twice I had to stop and pick up a pizza.
Twice I had to stop and pick up a pizza.
I fell when i saw u from across the street so can i get your name and number for insurance purposes
Is your daddy a thief cause it looks like he stole the stars from heaven and put them in ur eyes
Wanna play house? you be the screen door and i bang u all night long
Ever seen the back seat of an impala? want to? (i own one)
whats the square root of 69? you and me!!
Love the shirt your wearin but it would look better crumpled up next to my bed
Do u know a good dentist? (Y she asks? ) cause, girl your so sweet my teeth hurt
Nice shoes! wanna fuck?
Doctor is for little kids. Let's play gynecologist.
Your parents must be retarded, because you're special[*]
I know milk does a body good, but DAMN...How much have you been drinking?
You must be a parking ticket, cause you got fine written all over you
Can you give me a hand with this? (reference genitals) The doctor says I'm not supposed to lift heavy things.
Excuse me ladies, have you seen my beach ball? It's about this big around (flex), and I left it over there (flex).
Steve Martin quote "Why do women love me? Is it because I say such romantic things, like, are you through yet? Is it because I've been known to GO up to one time a night?"
Would you like an australian kiss? Its like a french kiss, but down under.
would you like a "Y" hug? hold your arms up like a "Y" and close your eyes......... *KISS*
(CAUTION DANGEROUS)
(CAUTION DANGEROUS)
I had a really hard day. Want to help me work it out?
"So, what do you think of me so far"?
"You must be a wrench, cause soon as I saw you-my nuts tightened up".....ha.
my friend would use the line wana drink a 6 pack and fuck or dont you drink lol.cant beleive how often that worked
"Honey you make me so hard I don't have enough skin left to blink"
After seeing some of these pick up lines, I recall a rejection line that seems appropriate.
Next time I want to hear from an arse...........I'll fart.
Next time I want to hear from an arse...........I'll fart.
Would you like to play house? I will be the door and you can bang me all night long.
Actually, I've never believed in using pickup lines.
I just stand there licking my eyebrows and let nature take its course.
I just stand there licking my eyebrows and let nature take its course.
Can't believe this one had not been posted yet:
"Did it hurt.....? ....when you fell from heaven?"
"Did it hurt.....? ....when you fell from heaven?"
UTAHPLEASURES wrote:
You must be a parking ticket, cause you got fine written all over you
A lot of good ones here, but this one takes the cake. If a remotely attractive person delivered this line in my face I'd be smiling from ear to ear in short order.
A lot more direct with a little less finesse... my mama told me not to talk to strangers, but she never said I couldn't fuck'em
Do you know gods number? I need to call him and tell him one of his angles is here - lol
OK, I see my best lines aren't the best! LOL!
I had a guy on his mission email me on face book and ask "when I get back wanna play naked twister" my favorite is kiss me if I'm wrong but is your name Christine
It's not going to lick it itself.
read carefully. :P
Just saw this one in a movie: Let's blow this joint, then blow each other.
The alphabet has to be changed, I needs to be next to U
Or the subtle approach for the classy types...
"Betcha a blow job you won't fuck me."
"Is your dad a baker? Cuz you get me up early in the morning, and taste sweeter than pie.."
"I've lost my phone number, can I borrow yours?"
"They say women are like a fine wine, and I am thinking about drinking right now!"
"Did I leave my virginity at your house, can we go look?"
"Betcha a blow job you won't fuck me."
"Is your dad a baker? Cuz you get me up early in the morning, and taste sweeter than pie.."
"I've lost my phone number, can I borrow yours?"
"They say women are like a fine wine, and I am thinking about drinking right now!"
"Did I leave my virginity at your house, can we go look?"
1.My momma told me if i ever looked at stuff like that i would turn to stone....and i feel something getting hard right now.
2. I'm lost can i follow you home
2. I'm lost can i follow you home
Wow Girl, you have nice legs, what time do they open?
Asked her what she was doing , she said waiting for someone to take her home (I think she was talking about her friends) I said" I'll take you home, you house or mine?" .. She picked mine..lol
"the word of the day today is "legs", let's go back to my place and spread the word."
I'm having a party in my pants. Would you like to cum?
quick drop your pants i think i know you
"I could bounce a quarter off your ass..."
Are you a gardener, cuz I'm thinking of you planting tulips right here, right now...