Swingers Forum - How many of you actually have feelings...

This is a follow-up question to "WHAT'S A TRUE SWINGER".
Being there was a big response and different opinons on the subject and also some cold response's toward other Partners.
Some have said they only consider single guy/girls as tools so the question is and I know some may not want to answer for obvious reason is:

How many of you actually care or feel anything for the people you swing with other than just the Physical act and do you even care about satisfing them. Whether it's with a single person or couple?

oh yeah. i forgot to add:

fighty thread. fighty thread. does whatever a fighty thread does. can it swing... from a web? no it can't... its a thread. look ooooout. here comes a fighty threeead!

Define "feelings".

Of course, anyone I am physically involved with there has to be a mutual friendship/respect with. It doesn't mean we have to be BFFs but if I want to get off without making sure my partner(s) get off too I can stay home and play with my bullet or vibrator. Part of the whole experience is interacting with a real life person. And if you're not into ME (Tammy, not just "Blueeyes")and don't care about MY experience with you, then hit the road Jack and don't come back...as they say.

As for romantic feelings...ugh. Been there, done that. Failed miserably. HUGE wall up and never, ever, want to go there again. Period. Bad enough I'm still in love with him, totally get always have been and always will be, but there is no point in falling into that trap again. Love isn't a battlefield, it's a suicide mission.

Now if you will excuse me, responding to this thread has made me wanna crawl in bed with my blankey and a bag of Dove Chocolates.

KITTY!!!!! That's wasteful. Ya use em once, then turn em inside out and shake the "fuck" out of em. BAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA good to go for another round. hehe

PEBBLEROCK wrote:

KITTY!!!!! That's wasteful. Ya use em once, then turn em inside out and shake the "fuck" out of em. BAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA good to go for another round. hehe

ohhh yeah. i forgot about going green and recycling. i'll remember that next time. :P

I luv each and every one of you!

I care for all people who treat me, like I treat them ~ which is with respect ~ humility & class ~ I believe that most people are good and I love to make people happy ~ My Love Language is "acts of service" probably why I've been in the restaurant business the majority of my life So I do care if we move forward to play time I want them to have an experience that they say WOW when we all are finished.

I love myself the mostest EVER! I treat myself to dinner and give myself a good time EEEEEVERY night. I love myself in bed. hahahahaha

As corny as it may sound, I doubt I could have sex with someone unless I cared for/about them.

As for satisfying....................
Refer to another thread - us "older men" live by the philosophy that nice guys finish last.
Having an orgasm myself does nothing for me compared to giving one (or more) to a lady.
Now THAT'S an ego trip.

I can honestly say, that I couldn't go to a bar, pick up random Joe Blow, take him home, screw the hell out of him, and after all that be able to say, "WOW" that was a truly satisfying experience for me! Why? Because there is no connection! I know for women, there tends to be somewhat of more of an emotional connection than for guys in this (ok ok I'm generalizing, if you are a guy and disagree, my appologies). I make it a point to get to know people, connect on some level and then potentially take things from there. I have met some truly amazing, intelligent, talented, kindhearted, funny, witty, caring, sincere couples and singles since being on this site (Why would I know these details? Because I cared to pay attention), that truly mean a lot to me to have in my life. We are friends, first and foremost. That's how I prefer it. And hey, who out there wants to tell me that a little bit of familiarity is a bad thing, even when swinging?

I can easily fuck someone I didn't care about. Sex is sex. It is a physical act. Would it be as much fun as sharing the emotional affection with someone? No, but I'd still come and so would he/she/they. One night stands are great. So are regular friendships. Actually, most of my "hook ups" from here have resulted in friendships.

Mav

Group sex and one fuck after the other has its

Hi Blueeyesinutah, I cannot imagine being single in the Lifestyle. It must be very difficult as far as dating and relationships go. I think that it boils down to the fact that we are built to crave love and companionship. For the Hubby and I, Swinging is about having FUN with good friends with whom we have good chemistry with and would chose as friends even if we were not playing with them. Some of those fine lines may have gotten blurred in your experience. I love my friends....platonic and playmates. It is just a personal preference to play with friends that that we connect with on other levels besides the physical. As far as romantic love goes, we are not open to that because my hubby and I have that already and so do our playmates. Being a single lady probably leaves you predisposed to fall in love with a playmate. Have you ever thought of getting a male swing partner that you are not romantically attracted to? Just a suggestion. Good luck!

SUMINDYFUN wrote:

Hi Blueeyesinutah, I cannot imagine being single in the Lifestyle. It must be very difficult as far as dating and relationships go. I think that it boils down to the fact that we are built to crave love and companionship. For the Hubby and I, Swinging is about having FUN with good friends with whom we have good chemistry with and would chose as friends even if we were not playing with them. Some of those fine lines may have gotten blurred in your experience. I love my friends....platonic and playmates. It is just a personal preference to play with friends that that we connect with on other levels besides the physical. As far as romantic love goes, we are not open to that because my hubby and I have that already and so do our playmates. Being a single lady probably leaves you predisposed to fall in love with a playmate. Have you ever thought of getting a male swing partner that you are not romantically attracted to? Just a suggestion. Good luck!

You have some very good points. However, it wasn't a playmate that I fell in love with altho yes, D did introduce me to Swingular 4 months after we were dating. I have had several offers of "partnering up" from available single guys in order to participate as a "couple" but they never seem to pan out. Either they get demanding with me and what (or whom) I'm doing when not with them, or they flake out dates we make with others. As far as lines getting crossed or blurred, yeah. I have had more married men try to "cheat" or lie their way to see me even if they are a swinging couple. And scarily enough I am NOT exaggerating or trying to toot my own horn, but every couple I have ever been intimate with has ended up breaking up/divorced. Hard to not take that personally. I feel like a relationship jinx. (And here's where Blueeyes popularity suddenly plumments)

Truthfully, if you read my profile it really does spell me out. I have walls because that is what is needed. I don't WANT to be the clingy emotional needy girl looking to find a SO on a swinging site. But right now with everything life has thrown at me, sometimes a girl just needs good friends who don't judge her for not being what everyone else wants her to be. I have been so blessed to find some really GOOD people that have been totally supportive - wheather it's a hand to hold when I was sick from chemo, or meeting me for coffee when I needed to get out, to taking me to dinner and treating me me with respect and showing genuine interest, to uh, just kissing me completely so that I forget my troubles (and sometimes my own name. LOL). There are few bad moments but hell, I'm not perfect so everyone else gets a pass from perfection too.

Sex is a biological need. Yes, my breakup did impact my desire for intimacy but I actually got some good advice after posting about it and took the bull by the horn and got proactive in fixing it. No, I still don't want to run into a house party and fuck everything with a pulse, LOL, but I gave myself permission to feel physically attracted enough for some good kissing/make out. And also an awesome romp in the sack (he knows who he is and talk about being a good friend being there for me). And if Cupid tries to shoot me again, well me and him are going the rounds.

Not relationship ready. And that's ok. In the meantime, Im good with FWB as long as the friendship connection is there. After all, I'm still a girl. Random stranger fucking still seems a little unappetizing. Altho...I do have this total naughty fantasy of meeting a hot guy in a hotel bar and him seducing me all the way up to his room and not even knowing his real name....~sigh~

I promise people, I will be ok. Just because "I" don't believe in love, those of you that do, go for it. Knock yourselves out. I just wanna flirt, have great conversation, laugh, and give into what ever naughty urges kicks in at that particular moment.

By the way, does anyone have a sex swing?

shhh. unless the grammar cop is bringing handcuffs, let's not draw attention to my posts. YIKES.

xox
Tammy

BLUEEYESINUTAH wrote:

SUMINDYFUN wrote:

Hi Blueeyesinutah, I cannot imagine being single in the Lifestyle. It must be very difficult as far as dating and relationships go. I think that it boils down to the fact that we are built to crave love and companionship. For the Hubby and I, Swinging is about having FUN with good friends with whom we have good chemistry with and would chose as friends even if we were not playing with them. Some of those fine lines may have gotten blurred in your experience. I love my friends....platonic and playmates. It is just a personal preference to play with friends that that we connect with on other levels besides the physical. As far as romantic love goes, we are not open to that because my hubby and I have that already and so do our playmates. Being a single lady probably leaves you predisposed to fall in love with a playmate. Have you ever thought of getting a male swing partner that you are not romantically attracted to? Just a suggestion. Good luck!

You have some very good points. However, it wasn't a playmate that I fell in love with altho yes, D did introduce me to Swingular 4 months after we were dating. I have had several offers of "partnering up" from available single guys in order to participate as a "couple" but they never seem to pan out. Either they get demanding with me and what (or whom) I'm doing when not with them, or they flake out dates we make with others. As far as lines getting crossed or blurred, yeah. I have had more married men try to "cheat" or lie their way to see me even if they are a swinging couple. And scarily enough I am NOT exaggerating or trying to toot my own horn, but every couple I have ever been intimate with has ended up breaking up/divorced. Hard to not take that personally. I feel like a relationship jinx. (And here's where Blueeyes popularity suddenly plumments) Truthfully, if you read my profile it really does spell me out. I have walls because that is what is needed. I don't WANT to be the clingy emotional needy girl looking to find a SO on a swinging site. But right now with everything life has thrown at me, sometimes a girl just needs good friends who don't judge her for not being what everyone else wants her to be. I have been so blessed to find some really GOOD people that have been totally supportive - wheather it's a hand to hold when I was sick from chemo, or meeting me for coffee when I needed to get out, to taking me to dinner and treating me me with respect and showing genuine interest, to uh, just kissing me completely so that I forget my troubles (and sometimes my own name. LOL). There are few bad moments but hell, I'm not perfect so everyone else gets a pass from perfection too. Sex is a biological need. Yes, my breakup did impact my desire for intimacy but I actually got some good advice after posting about it and took the bull by the horn and got proactive in fixing it. No, I still don't want to run into a house party and fuck everything with a pulse, LOL, but I gave myself permission to feel physically attracted enough for some good kissing/make out. And also an awesome romp in the sack (he knows who he is and talk about being a good friend being there for me). And if Cupid tries to shoot me again, well me and him are going the rounds. Not relationship ready. And that's ok. In the meantime, Im good with FWB as long as the friendship connection is there. After all, I'm still a girl. Random stranger fucking still seems a little unappetizing. Altho...I do have this total naughty fantasy of meeting a hot guy in a hotel bar and him seducing me all the way up to his room and not even knowing his real name....~sigh~ I promise people, I will be ok. Just because "I" don't believe in love, those of you that do, go for it. Knock yourselves out. I just wanna flirt, have great conversation, laugh, and give into what ever naughty urges kicks in at that particular moment. By the way, does anyone have a sex swing?

No, butt I can have one by the time you get here.

My mother died in a tragic skydiving incident only 2 days after giving birth to me. So I never had the chance to learn any manners.

Lay day down your battle flag and let the freak flag fly!

Blueeyes: Let's make a team flag

RIPBECKI wrote:

I don't know about if anyone has feelings but I have noticed here in the last couple weeks it's gotten rude around here. Maybe it's just use but we were raised to say hi back to someone when they say hi to you even if you don't know them or like them, it's called having manners. We can't even get a HI or hello in return when we go to the chatroom and say hello to everyone especially when it's filled up with people from Utah. It's made us think about possibly leaving the site for good.

You're gonna leave the site cuz nobody says hi to you in chat??

RIPBECKI wrote:

I don't know about if anyone has feelings but I have noticed here in the last couple weeks it's gotten rude around here. Maybe it's just use but we were raised to say hi back to someone when they say hi to you even if you don't know them or like them, it's called having manners. We can't even get a HI or hello in return when we go to the chatroom and say hello to everyone especially when it's filled up with people from Utah. It's made us think about possibly leaving the site for good.

RIPBECKI, there have been at least 2 ocassions where I posted a simple "Hi Neighbor" to you in the Chat Room (we live what, 30 miles apart?), and NEVER got a response.
I'm NOT in Utah.
It's a two-way street, ya know.
I realize your profile doesn't allow for single males, and that's what I am.
But for crying out loud, all it was was a simple "hello" - yet, you did NOTHING to answer me.
It's not as if I was bugging you to let me fuck your parakeet.

HELLO_KITTY12984 wrote:

CARRIERMAN wrote:

It's not as if I was bugging you to let me fuck your parakeet.

and this is why i'd invite you over if you lived in utah. i have TWO parakeets. as long as i can film it, i'm satisfied. :P

I'm ready for my close up.

OH! i forgot something else. Why are you talking about such useless crap. Don't you have someting better to do or discuss. From the time man first appeared on earth they started sharing sexually with each other and there was literally no feelings involved and as Tina Turner would say "Whats Love Got To Do With It?

GENERAL wrote:

OH! i forgot something else. Why are you talking about such useless crap. Don't you have someting better to do or discuss. From the time man first appeared on earth they started sharing sexually with each other and there was literally no feelings involved and as Tina Turner would say "Whats Love Got To Do With It?

I do not know what planet you live on. Unless you are totally dead inside, there are always feelings or you would not have sex. I know. I have been there twice. The only reason you do not commit suicide in that state is that nothing hurts and nothing feels and sex is totally irrelevant. So never tell me that there are no feelings in sex. It is nice to know you are so all knowing about others and how they feel when having sex. And how would you know about the sex drives of those that crawled out of the mud unless you were there and crawled out with them. Excuse the blast, but thems fightin words pardner.

LARRYP69 wrote:

Thank You Naugh-Ty! not only are you beautiful on the outside but beautiful on the inside as well !!!

Thanks hun...I have a good thought once in a while lol

CARRIERMAN wrote:

I'll take any kinda stimulation I can get!

Oh you want me to stimulate your feelings?? *giggles*

CARRIERMAN wrote:

NAUGHTYGIRL101 wrote:

[quote=CARRIERMAN]I'll take any kinda stimulation I can get!

Oh you want me to stimulate your feelings?? *giggles*

When the time cums - we can negotiate.[/quote]

Ok but fair warning...I'm a tough negotiator...I usually get what I want...hehehe

BLUEEYESINUTAH wrote:

How do we feel about self-love? ;-)

I love myself often. Tooooo often.

And I'm just wondering who pissed in the Generals Post Toasties...

Come on...fess up!

your mom's not important, your dad is. er.... wait a minute.... :S hahahahaha