Swingers Forum - How do you handle the death of someone you know from here?

This is a very difficult situation, so I need some pointers here. I'll give a very brief synopsis of the situation and request any pointers you might be able to shed. I have been a swinger for nearly 30 years now. About 8 years ago I met a lady on another sex/swinging site and introduced her to Swingular. I helped her get a platinum membership (She was a disabled person with limited income). As our relationship progressed we opened a couples account (Platinum), however since we had agreed on having a totally open relationship we each kept our singles accounts. When we decided we just were not right for each other (for life partners), we had kept the couples account because we occasionally played with others as a full swap couple. My friend was a BBW, and I am fairly average with a few extra pounds. My friend was getting a lot of activity on her account and had been seeing quite a few men from here. She and I have remained best friends, and because of some situations she moved into my house as my roommate about 6 months ago. Things were going fine for both of us as we have no jealousy issues and each have been free to live our lives independent of each other. Now here is the sticky part, my friend died at 4:45 PST Sun 9/5/10 of acute respiratory and coronary failure. She literally died in my arms as I was assisting her out of the house and to the car to take her to the ER because she couldn't hold onto her walker. So here is my big question - I have access to her account, should I inform others that are contacting her of what has happened. She was a very good friend and her happiness was always of paramount importance to me, while others did not support her in her pursuits on this and similar sites.

I appreciate the reply LRMKRVO. I have sent a few messages to her recent replies. I have not modified her profile yet because of being incredibly busy with her family and making arrangements for her memorial services. I am finding my predicament to be getting a little more convoluted now. My friend and her brother (Marc) had a very strained relationship the last few years after he sold her house out from under her shortly after their mother died. He has basically dumped the responsibility for planning her services on my friend's older sister (Lisa) and I. My friend (Denise) and her sister got along great, and when we were together I had told Denise I had the hots for Lisa. I didn't know that Denise had told Lisa and also shared some other intimate details about me with Lisa, not that I would have objected because I had told Denise she could tell any woman all my kinks. I really think too much about it afterward when the three of us had a conversation about the lifestyle and open relationships. Lisa was involved at the time with a man that neither Denise nor I really liked all that much, and had politely said that while the thought of us having a tryst was intriguing she felt her guy would never permit it, and might even cause bodily harm to all of us. Lisa has since gotten rid of him and is now (according to Denise) engaged to another man. I know that Lisa knows some very intimate and kinky details about my desires, and that I am still hot for her. When she called me tonight to tell me that her brother dumped it on us to plan the services because he was leaving on vacation to Italy and would not be back for two weeks, she said "If there is anything I can do for you, anything at all, let me know." So now I am wondering if Lisa is opening the door for me to initiate something. I have been trying to keep all my sexual feelings bottled up because I don't want to overstep boundaries, but it would be nice to have an outlet. Denise and I had not had sex with each other in over two years, although we have met and played separately with another couple about eight months ago, and it has been almost 3 years since I saw Lisa in person since she lives in another state. I had talked with Lisa about 6 month's ago, right after Denise had attempted suicide, and I had let it slip then that I was still hot for her. So now I am wondering if I should somehow, very discretely and subtly, ask Lisa if she was opening that door, or should I say nothing at all and possibly let something wonderful slip away?

Don't forget that you don't really die you just leave
the body. She is right there with you any time you think
of her. I really believe this 100%. if you just
think of her and concentrate you can almost hear her
Talking to you. It takes some practice but you can begin
to feel her and hear her in time. That's the one thing
in life that that's really fucked up. Good luck & hope this
helps!

My GF committed suicide on 4-14-10 and I'm dealing with a lot of the same things. Friends just finding out and wondering what happened, and very distant people just coming around. I keep her myspace just as it was because that's how she left it. I notify anyone sending her messages of her passing and let it be at that. I've found now, 4 months out, that I'm not as sad as I have been but I am more empty. So I feel it's important to really take ALOT of time to focus on yourself and what you're going to do for YOU now. I had a friend put it to me like this. "Say you are out on your bicycle ridding around and having a great time. All of a sudden you get a flat. Now you're not having as great of a time as you were but it's still a pretty good day. You have to fix that flat before you'll be back to having that great time again. You can't just go on riding like nothing happened." So I'm still patching the hole in my tire as are you. Once it's patched, the hole won't be gone, it's still there, but it's patched so you can get back to the good times. Hope that helps a little.

That's the key, finding the kit and patching the holes. You and only you know what's in that kit. That's how I feel anyway. I took little bits and pieces of others kits but in the end I had to build my own.

Thanks Tammy, and all who are posting to this topic. At least we know we are not alone. My friend had two prior suicide attempts, one about 6 months after we first met over 8 years ago, then again this past March. The attempt in march left her short term memory messed up (she could remember things a year or more ago, but not what she did 5 minutes ago), which is why she wound up living with me as I was the only person who gave a damn about her. Her death on Sunday came as a shock because she had such a great time at the fair with me and she was looking forward to many things, but alas in the end it was organ failure that took her life.

Larry