Franklin Swingers in Wisconsin

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BD/SM- Why are there no groups? - - Now this IS Terry. OMG, did I unleash a monster when I put a profile on Fetlife.com for her? Just kidding, she's an angel. Even if there might be just a touch of devil, or at least imp. Anyway, that didn't work out as well as hoped, like Evil said, most fetish groups don't swing, their events aren't usually about sex, just discussions, socializing, and demonstrations, with people doing scenes with the people they're already in a BDSM relationship with. And before someone asks me "well, why don't you just ...", it's simple. She's into some things I'm not and in that life, if you aren't really into something, even if you do know what to do and how to do it, you can't really be a very good Dom. Since the guy is supposed to make the girl happy, I did the Fetlife profile for her. The first thing a new person who's interested in some BDSM group will get told is "We don't swing", that he/she isn't going to be able to go to an event or even party and hook up with someone, that even if he/she gets invited to participate in someone's scene (it does happen occasionally) it isn't likely to culminate in actual sex. Which makes it difficult for someone who wants her BDSM to be part of actual sex. One thing though, Evil. The Fifty Shades of Gray phenomenon notwithstanding, BDSM is more secretive than swinging. Anyone who finds a swing event online can attend, unless he's a single male and it's a no single males thing. Not so with BDSM. Fetlife, for example, has more than one sub-group that sponsors events. You can find the events on the site, but you can't just go to them. You have to be sponsored by someone from that group. And not everyone in the group, people who themselves have been through the process and can attend the group's events without a sponsor, can even be a sponsor. There are always specific requirements and a process of some sort to go through to become approved to sponsor new people. There's still a stronger stigma attached to BDSM than there is to swinging, and the potential consequences to being outed are more severe, especially in a place like Utah. So the people are much more cautious than are swingers, and swingers don't exactly put up billboards ads on the highway. ~ Terry

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - Oh shit the racist card was pulled... well I guess am fucked since I am a spic or as other might say Bilingual Ni

Have you ever met anyone TRULY crazy in the lifestyle? - - OK so we're not overly qualified to answer, as we're quite new and haven't gotten to know anybody very well yet at all, but I do have some observations to add. Are we all nuts? NO. some are, some aren't. Many "normal" folks may think we're abnormal, crazy even. I mean, we don't exactly run around telling everybody we like to see our spouses pleasured by others, that isn't a very "Christian" or "normal" thing in society's eyes. It doesn't make us crazy. Adventurous? YES Thrillseekers? YES Different? YES Insane? NO Case in point: It's my observation that most swingers ride motorcycles. That puts them definitely in the first 2 categories. There are a ton more Bikers that are completely Vanilla and totally sane, some may say "Different" because riding isn't everybody's thing. (We're scared to death of riding, and probably never will know the serenity and enjoyment it brings most.) As far as meds go, remember this is the Zanax capitol of the world right here in the land of Zion. Not to mention the number of swinging active LDS members, other church-goers, retirees, well-paid professionals, business owners, and hard working blue collar folk. So the cross-section of society really is still there. Obviously by profiles you will find different strokes for different folks in the sexuality department, and on a Vanilla dating site, you get the same. We have members here who are octogenarians, and others who are barely old enough to get into clubs. Crazies? sure you bet, there has to be. Just as with everything else, a certain percentage of any group will be a beer or two short of a sixer. I think that's why many here are hesitant, if not reluctant to entertain the thought of a hook-up with somebody they know from the web, but haven't met in real life. We definitely fall in that category ourselves. How many booty calls really get answered? Alot of times your mailbox gets stuffed with candor, friend request, and maybe a few cell #'s, but when the brass tacks fall, they end up lying there. It's good to know that Evildoers hasn't ever feared for their lives, with their experiences over the years. The few couples we have met with one-on-one have seemed completely normal, honest, and respectful, regardless of whether or not they (or we) felt any attraction sexually. So I guess we're doing OK, and we're both excited to meet new people as often as we can. That said, I'm going to take my meds and get some shut-eye ;) ~Torque

Sexy swingers closer to our age - 20-30 year old sexy swingers - WE are 42m 39f, always open to talking to attractive couples around our age!

Young swingers party - sold out, who still wants to party ? - You mean it's an actual party? I thought it was like a political group who wanted to meet to strategize about how to get Justine Bieber and Harry Styles on the ballet in 2016. [em]Emo_89[/em]

Married & single? - single minded affrairs? - It is a double standard. We have meet several couples that would never consider a cheating guy, but would a cheating woman. I think some people ignore the double standard because of the Law of scarcity. Married/relationship bound men that are exploring without their spouse are no different from Single men has been our experience. If anyone Male or Female is having a sexual or emotional relationship without their primary partner's knowledge then they are cheating. It's not a matter of the quality or quantity or even if the partner had suspicions or not. It's a matter of trust which they are breaking by having a relationship that their partner would not approve of. And yes the Law of Scarcity is accepted by many swingers in regard to a female wanting to explore.....including us.

Are swingers moral? - Who determines what morals are? - Neuroscience makes morality out to be largely born in and more complicated than just "stuff god doesn't like". For example, what one may see as an immoral act may in fact be quite honorable to someone in that person's in group. A gang banger seems immoral when he kills a rival gang member but a soldier is doing the same thing except that we call the gangs nations. What religion manages to do is take false credit for morality so that it can attach additional memes on so we get motivated to do those too. This amounts to "lying is bad so sex must be bad too". The problem with buying into that logic is that not everything churches say are bad actually are and can even override true morality. For instance, a religious hatred of homosexuals. This doesn't always happen and there are many influencing factors (again morality is quite complicated according to neuroscience) but it is often a potent driving factor. The short answer is that the more people you include in your in group the more people you will act morally toward.

Sturgis 2009 - - When and where is the Testy Festy... have heard about it but not too sure what it is, but have heard swingers have a way of letting others know they swing. We will also be heading back through Helene on our way home....

Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - Just what the hell is a life coach? Is that the new name people, without the proper education, training, and licensure, who counsel others are calling themselves today? I am a professional counselor, licensed and trained to do what I do. My Lady and I met on line at a swingers site and met over coffee at a local public pub. We ended back at her place for a great evening of sex....after an even better afternoon of intelligent conversation. That was two years ago and we have been together ever since. She has moved in with me, carries her own weight in all ways helping run "our" home. We swing, or would not be on this sight....lol, together and seperately. We are deeply in love and have decided to get married, because we do love, respect, cherish, honor and trust each other. Distrust and worry has nothing to do with playing with others, if you trust your partner, have done your own self examination and healed your own life wounds. Our sex life is absolutely GREAT!!!! Our swinging with other people is fun and an enhancement to our love making. I love to see the smile on her face, the spring in her step, and the gleem in her eye after she has been with one of her lovers...male or female. She loves to hear whether or not I had a good time and enjoyed myself with another lover. We may play seperately at times, but I know she is coming home to me...that is where her heart is! And I will always come home to her because that is where my heart and soul are! My professional discipline teaches to respect others and work with the client where they are. I am not to judge them or impose my values on them. When seeking guidance or help from a helping professional...and I mean licensed, trained professonal....do not ask their advise, nor follow their moral code. Each of us is a unique individual with different moral values, belief systems, and desires. As long as we are not harming another being or ourselves, then all is fair, fun, and healthy. Anything may be overindulged in...therefore, moderation is the key. If I drink too much I may be an alcoholic which is a problem, if I drink heavily I may just be a heavy drinker...the key is whether or not what I am doing harms others, my self or results in problems in my life or the life of people I love. You are correct in questioning whether or not swinging is for you, and if it results in any discomfort for either of you, talk openly and non-judgementally with each other. Love, as the saying goes, means never having to say your sorry. But love is open, trusting, non-threating, non-controlling, and is open to the opinions of each other. Because I deeply and honestly love my Lady and she me....her happiness and pleasure is more important than any thing to me. As one individual stated this will be my third marriage too. She completes me like no other person can. Best of hard work to get where you are comfortable looking at your mate and your self in the mirror....it well worth it what ever you decide.

"Not interested" replies - - It is more common than one thinks... Not responding to a note/email/whatever one wants to call the message one sends from a site to the site... It\'s a bloody shame that people are so rude.. As for the kiss thing...I think people see a profile and want to show it to their SO so they earmark it with a kiss or add people to their friends list. It\'s the only tool one has to tag the couple and easily get back to that profile.. Sometimes people forget how to uses all the tools and then after a day or two they forget who you were and how to find you then another time they are looking and say Oh theres a nice couple lets send a kiss or add them to our friends list.....After a dozen sites similar I think that people may also be a bit shy too.. What do I day to Mary and Phill, he\'s a doctor and has a TV show and I thought he didn\'t like swingers.... I think I\'ll just call and save money on my car insurance ...I\'ll call Gieco... Just a thought... but people spend money to get on a site and can\'t write a note.. They may do fine face to face but to write a note ...... No way....My theory... What\'s yours? A subject for Lenord Nemoy\'s show \"Unsolved Mysteries\".... Which stretches from the inner mind to the outer extremedies.... you have entered the swinger zone.....