South Bend Swingers in Washington

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Why the male side of Couples are here...? - I will admit I am hoping to spark some heated debate on this.... - (from Terry) And now I'm starting to understand why Evil and I seem to have senses of huimor that sometimes run in the same direction. It's because, in at least some pretty important ways, we see the world in the same way. I'm here for two reasons. First, I was doing this for a while back when it was one Hell of a lot harder than it is now for single men, they were very nearly completely excluded from the lifestyle which, then, was usually called, by both those inside and outside of it, "wife swapping". The very title, and the basic premise of things then, essentially disqualified single men. Now I'm talking about the late '70s and early '80s. Actual "hippiedom", and the free love philosophy was either diminishing, dying off, or dead, depending on where in the country you were. But we'd managed to change society's general view of some things, and sex was one of the biggest. The attitude change, especially on the part of women, who were no longer automatically "sluts" if they enjoyed sex and didn't need to be married, or engaged, or even "going steady" to indulge, together with effective and easily available birth control (illegal in every state until sometime in the early '60s, even condoms were ostensibly sold as and were labeled as being specifically for "disease prevention", and no worries about deadly and/or incurable STDs had changed the world, and birthed what is often referred to as a "sexual revolution". It was almost like falling off a log to go out on a weekend and find an amenable girl. So why the Hell was I bothering with the "wife swapping" world, when it was so damned difficult to even penetrate, let alone to "get something"? For the same reason I was one of those long-haired (except for my 3 years in the Army) hippie freak. I LOVE people who ignore what the rest of the world is telling them to do or not to do, and I want to be around them. Yeah, there are all sorts of individual exceptions, but, for the most part, as compared to the vanilla people, swingers are more intelligent, more likely to use their heads for something besides a hat rack, and, despite the various complaints about certain kinds of people or actions that pop up here, a Hell of a lot less judgmental and intolerant of people who aren't the same as they are. They, again as a general rule, think for themselves, and don't just latch on to the currently popular opinion about whatever. Why I'm here now is that I'm married to a girl 24 years younger than me, who happens to enjoy a couple things I can do but which I'm not really into, and she's at that so-called female sexual peak point in her life. And I figure that my main purpose in the world is to do everything I can to make her as happy as she can be. Being witches, we don't have the standard "you belong to me and only me" attitude about our life partners, we don't think sexual fun with some other person does a damned thing to diminish our relationship; if I have sex with Jane Doe or she has sex with John Smith (and maybe Jane Smith, too), we are still the same people afterwards that we were beforehand. So getting back into it, and bringing her into it, was a great way to help her have the kinds of fun she likes, and for me to hang around with a group of people that I really like. And meet and play with girls I really like. I'm one of those weird guys who does read the profiles before looking at the pics, and even once in a great while even send off an email before I've even seen any of the pics besides the main profile pic. It's just a lot more important who she is and what she's like than it is what she looks like. And I'll find lots more girls that I like and respect here than I ever could in the vanilla world. One thing about what Team said, though. Swinging can bring out and amplify problems in a relationship. But avoiding that is just a question of attitude. First, you have to absolutely trust in your partner's honesty with you. Even though the Mrs. has a hall pass, the only provision being that I meet any guy she might play with before she does, so I can feel like she's going to be safe with him, I know I'd be really upset if she ever started messing around with someone on the side without me even knowing it was going on. But In don't ever even worry about that actually happening, because I trust her completely. Just like she trusts me, not only to not start a secret "affair" with someone, but to never try to even influence who she does or doesn't play with. She knows that when I meet some potential playmate of hers, even if for some reason I think he's a total jerk, I'm not going to say anything. She's the one who will be playing with him, not me, so it's her job, not mine, to decide who's worth playing with. She knows the only time I'll have anything to say about whether she should or not is if I get an impression somehow that the guy can't be trusted to treat her well, and not ever hurt her, ever do or try to do anything she doesn't want. Point is, if you both don't totally trust each other, you're likely to have problems, even if neither of you ever actually does anything sneaky. The second thing is that you can't have the "normal" attitude about your partner, where you feel he or she is in a way your property, and if anyone else uses your property, you're being stolen from. You can't have that feeling that sex equates to love, the kind of love that makes someone want to permanently be with someone. else. If you feel that way, you'll end up worrying that having sex with another person might make him or her decide they've found a better companion, and leave you. Sex is something that goes with that permanent relationship kind of love, but it isn't what determines it. If you can't truly see, and feel, that sex itself is just another enjoyable activity that you do with people you like, just another form of friendship based intimacy like discussing some problem you have with a friend, you're probably going to have problems. If you're at all, in any way or for any reason, at all uncomfortable with your partner having sex with other people, or he or she is uncomfortable with you doing it, then you're probably going to run into difficulties. So it's all a matter of attitude. If you and your partner are truly completely fine with the other having sex with someone else, and if you both trust each other completely, swinging isn't going to destroy your relationship. If both of those attitude type things are not really and truly true for either of you, then it just might. And about that 70 years old thing, Hell, I'm only 6 years away from it, and I haven't yet run into any indications of decline. So far, the girls I've ended up in the bedroom with have been happy with the results. While I haven't yet (thank the Goddess), had to just rely on that ages old bit of wisdom, the one that says "when you're too old to cut the mustard, you can always lick the jar", it ain't everyone that can tie a cherry stem in a knot with his tongue, and I suppose that might be helping me out, but, then again, that always helps out, no matter how young you are [em]Emo_4[/em] But just in case that needing to be taken care of bit is one of those things that happens all of a sudden, like maybe it hits you at one minute past midnight on your 70th birthday, I think I better get Evil to hook me up with those friends of his, so we can have that room all arranged for and booked. Only Evil's limiting himself. I want 3 if those insatiable 22 year olds, one redhead, one blonde, and one brunette. When I commit suicide, I want it to be a truly memorable event, even though I won't be around to remember it. [em]Emo_45[/em] I mean, we can set up cameras and stuff in there, then my wife can get it all edited into a good porn flick, and the proceeds can help her out, in case we haven't managed to find her a nice sugar daddy by then.

Camping play? - Opinions - We are looking at some property in Duchesne and turning it in to a swingers camp ground. Do you think anyone would be interested in some thing like that

Know any Mormon swingers in SoCal? - Single girl in SoCal wants to know! - Everyone in the lifestyle has their own personal preferences and kinks. Part of the lifestyle is not letting social norms hold us back from experiencing those preferences/kinks. This is just her preference. We don't want others to "hate" on us our preferences, so let's not "hate" on her. :)

Age - New to the swingers community - is age a factor in how a couple is viewed? - attitude and personality to us mean everything. We as another couple on this site, have a good age difference. Me being 24, and him being 42. We are interested in a wide variety of things, so age isn't a problem with us as long as there are mutual interest, good personality, attitude and ofcourse an attraction. Donna & Brian

ha just horny...How bout you? - yep horny still haha - i think we are all always horny maybe that is why we are swingers. plus i love loads on my boobs

Swinging as solo Male part of a couple? - - My wife and I have been swingers for a while but she is not playing for at this time. She still attends parties with me and nude swims and such. She will goto meet/greets with me to assure all concerned that i am honest about our understanding. I changed my profile to reflect this and it has been since she stopped in January with not outside playtime for me. I know the world of swinging is a challenge for the single guy and I expected to find less playfriends but I thought that with a full disclosure of the honest situation would have attracted some that appreciate those that don

The vent! - Judgements, I'm so tired of them. -

Other activities? - Do you only meet swingers for sex? - we are going to make two posts. This one (the humor) and a more serious one. The second will take a bit of writing... Meet em at the party Have sex with them find out names go to dinner decide it you like them have a nice after dinner conversation MEANT COMPLETELY as humor

Kik group for UT swingers. - Contact me if your interested in joining a KIK group for Swingers - Send me a KIK. Urnewsecret

who starts? - - You would think, as much as the phrase [i]communication is key[/i], gets bandied about people would really want to actively engage in communication. It would seem natural that the more experienced parties would take the lead in discussing how things get done much like flight instructors explaining that when the oxygen masks drop from the overhead compartment, you place it over your head, secure the elastic strap and breathe. However in this lifestyle that couldn't be further from the truth. The problem is that if there is too much chit chat then someone is always in danger of being dumbfounded by the use of a big word. It's hard to be sexy when all the blood is now rushing to your head in a desperate attempt to draw upon a vocabulary that just isn't there in the first place. How do you get around this? Well, I certainly don't need to explain the folly of having a dictionary next to the hot tub. This is why it is strongly encouraged that swingers incorporate healthy role-play. When trying to get that new couple to first base it's best to stick with the basics. A good old fashion game of Neanderthals...ahem, excuse me, I mean cave people. Then the fun can proceed upon simple phrases like, "You look good" or "Me touch you now?" When becoming aroused you might say, "Oooh, this is how make fire," or "I look in hole for water," to facilitate cunnilingus. This role-play is especially helpful to those who don't have hot tubs, or who may have suggested strip Uno because they thought a