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HELP!!!!!!!!! I guess we need to work on our profile - - Maybe you could add a coupon for a free bowl of soup? That's always a big hit around the holiday shopping season.
If that doesn't work, be sure to add the lines about how in love you are with each other, how you are DD free and expect to stay that way, you are looking to spice up your great love life, and be sure to write NO SINGLE MALES!!! 3 times all in CAPS so people know you are REALLY serious... You don't want any of those sneaky little bastards squeaking through the cracks.
Oh yeah, don't forget to dress up your profile with those fancy MySpace backgrounds. Include a picture of your sportscar, boat, and two-headed squirrel that you caught while on your exotic vacation in Rexburg ID... these all get extra points.
Last but not least, you gotta have a closeup shot of your genitals. Who says that once you've seen 10,000 knobby/dried up peckers, they all look the same?
When in doubt, look at the profiles of other popular people on this site, read their clever ads, and do the old "copy and paste" routine. Just don't copy their pics, people may be disappointed when they are expecting Ben and Jennifer, and they end up meeting more common folk. Warning: Don't copy our profile. It is down right stupid and was obviously written by an ignoramous.
The bottom line... profiles are pretty much all the same. Writing some clever literary prose ain't gonna get you laid.
The only thing I've got going for me is a hot wife (bait), alcohol (to relax the spouse of the guy who wants to fuck my wife), and chloroform (to disable the other guy's wife when she finally decides "there ain't no way she's 'taking it for the team' with that crazy bastard! "
Oh yeah, one more thing.... I also was smart enough to move away from Utah to a place where there are good swinger clubs, lots of hot sexy swingers, and our law-makers aren't a bunch of old white haired guys, in funny underware, who think a good time involves green jello and an accordian player!
I gotta tell my former neighbors... I've been to "The Place" and it definitely is NOT in Utah. (Note: the Cirque at Snow Bird and Catherine's Area at Alta might be the closest exception to that last statement)
I hope that was helpful. Good luck with your profile.
:D
A&E New show about swingers... - neighbors with benefits.... - For the love of all things good ladies and gentlemen......get some male photos in your profiles. Its like shopping for beef at the farmers market
Now that you're one of them there fancy swingers... - - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET][quote=TIFFND][quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]Has swinging become too popular and become passe?
Oh, and fuck Crispy Cremes.....Banbury Cross all the way Evil. [/quote]I think fucking doughnuts is another thread.[/quote]
Just donuts or how about bismarks and danish?[/quote]I prefer "Hostess O's" I'm not a big guy, you know..well..you don't, I suppose..Brings a tear to my eye just thinking about it. Thanks alot DeliciouslyWet! Hmmm..never fucked a Dane tho....are there any here on Swingular?
KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - Just saw a commercial for KUTV's and the Salvation Army's annual Angel Tree charity for providing Xmas gifts for the poor and needy. Wouldn't it be fun to support this effort by adopting some angels in the name of Utah's swinging community? Hell, we could even provide some kick ass sex toys for some shut in widow or something. I'm betting a few ladies here might know which toys work the best. [em]Emo_12[/em]
Swingers - a couples only lifestyle? - Are singles considered to be swingers? - The term "swinger" is a label, plain and simple.
I like to think that sexuality is about the moment, not some label.
These days I tend to get pissy when someone refers to me as a "swinger". Its lumping me together with people that are not at all like me.
Cedar City - - Oh yeah, tons of LS clubs and swingers there lol
Lifestyle vacations - Best place for a lifestyle vacation? - We just went on our first lifestyle vacation to hedonism 2 in Jamaica. We went with a group called young swingers week (OP just meets the criteria) and it was amazing. The resort itself is fantastic, the staff is friendly, the entertainers are very good, and there's always plenty to do even if you decide not to interact with others. And, of course, there's always the other guests.
Contrary to the previous post, only half the resort requires nudity; the other half is clothing optional and the dining areas and front desk require some covering. If you're going in March I'd definitely suggest going swingers week if there's still spots available. They buy out the whole resort (minus a couple legacy rooms) and get to add an extra layer of events for the group. The hosts are amazing. Basically, there's a reason they get something like a 70 or 80% return rate year after year.
Swingers clubs in Amsterdam - - While we are on the subject of recommendations, would you be able to recommend any good clubs in the Houston area? I find myself there semi-frequently these days.
Thanks,
Jim
Disabled Swingers - - My best friend was disabled, and while up until the last month of her life she was not confined to needing mobility assistance, she was active in the lifestyle and very upfront with people about her disability. She was always a BBW, struggling with issues from severe depression and diabetes, her weight fluctuated up and down as a side effect of various medications and changes in medications to manage her primary illness, that being bipolar disorder. Sometimes she had zero sex drive as a side effect of some of the medications for her depression, and sometimes she wanted sex 24/7 (Manic side of the bipolar disorder). She always told anyone that contacted her about her illness from the first contact/reply and would leave it up to them if there was ever to be an in person meeting knowing that she may or may not be able to play. We were friends for over 8 years, and while we were active in the lifestyle as a couple for 2 years we always let others know there was a possibility of the other one of us being around (especially when she was having bad times from her mental illness). She always had a good time when she was able to play, and we met a lot of really good people.
So just hang in there, be honest and confident. You will meet people that are willing to play with you once they understand your situation and limitations, and you will have some wonderful times.
Larry
Meeting LS With GPS Locations~Nearby Services - Meeting others through Technology... - SDC (Swingers Dating Club) app has something like that. Everyone's location shows up on a map as a color coded dot. You can click on the dot and see the profile or event. Is this what you are thinking about?
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