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Staying a couple in the lifestyle - - [quote=Sofutosuwappu]Our experience so far:
Religious > naturist > meet naturists/nudists who are swingers > soft swap > non-religious > full swap with couples same room > full swap separate room
Thoughts?[/quote]
Wow - what a great thread Sofutosuwappu! I just read some of these responses today. We're actually shocked! Evil - 60 couples . . . WOW! This has not been our experience at all.
While we are relatively new in the LS (since 2015) and we definitely have less LS play experience than most who have commented - our experience has been very different from that described . . . both in terms of our own evolution, but also in terms of what we have personally witnessed with friends.
ALL of the couples we have met in the LS are still together and in loving long-term relationships (as far as we know). Part of that may be dumb luck . . . part of it may be in the 'rules' we set for ourselves. We don't play separately . . . part of the fun is seeing your partner receive joy, pleasure, and excitement! We also specifically seek out people in Long Term relationships . . . and we have stayed away from profiles that intimated a DTF (down to fuck) kind of mind set. Not that there is anything wrong with that - we don't judge . . . just not something we have been interested in. We are attracted to beautiful relationships.
As for our own evolution . . we are STILL very religious, we jumped into the LS first . . . and THEN became nudists 🤣 We have made only a slight adjustment to our play style from our first adventure, and we have no interest in becoming 'non-religious' - we have found the LS to be a continuation or advancement of our understanding of the Judeo-Christian commandment to 'Love One Another'. Maybe we just haven't been in long enough . . . maybe we are self-deluded and are secretly living a life of cognitive dissonance . . . but so far so good.
One HUGE change is that when we first started in the LS . . . we thought we would want to be completely anonymous . . . going so far as to create 'fake names' etc. (I know . . . but we were still virgins . . . we feel SOME guilt about that . . . but we have subsequently repented!😉) We thought that the less people knew about us . . . the better. That changed 180 degrees within the first 6 months of our stumbling into this LS. Now . . . we only seek friends . . . who can be genuine friends . . . and if that progresses to any type of sexual exploration . . . all the better . . . but the friendship rules.
I'm sure we still have a lot to figure out in this regard - but we cherish our new and longer-term friendships . . . and honestly can't wait to spend time with these people. We are missing the summer live concert venues . . . and we can't wait till the next time we meet with friends. If that makes us 'poly-amorous' . . . then consider us 'guilty as charged' - We have somehow managed to maintain significant and deep friendships with just about everyone we've played with. We don't see that changing.
Hope that helps - thought it might as far as providing an alternate perspective. We love the authenticity and honesty shown to us by friends in the LS - we honestly have a hard time now maintaining vanilla relationships . . . whats the point??🤷♂️
Thank you all for the riveting discussion!
Question - do you talk about other swingers? - I have found that when I meet someone new for drinks or dinner etc, that a good place to start the conversation is about the site on which you met and some of your experiences there. My question is, How much, or do you talk about other members or swingers in your area. Sometimes it's a very small world, lol especially if you're meeting someone local.Usually it seems hard to avoid if you or they have comments or certifications on your profiles, sometimes someone will ask what you thought of "so&so" I usually try to be discreet and not mention any names if I'm discussing some experience I've had. But then again there have been times when other people have mentioned names of swingers who were really hot, or maybe even some that were not "so fun" to meet lol and it has been helpful to me. So what do you think?
Other activities? - Do you only meet swingers for sex? - No it is not just for sex although that is a really fun part of it. Some of the things we have done with couples that we swing with inlude, going out to dinner, go to a movie together, go to a play, go to a concert, go shoot some pool toether, go bowling, invite them up to our cabin for the weekend (yes we have had couples come spend an entire weekend at the cabin and not play even though we had before and since). We like to go hiking together, fix a fun dinner in at our place in town or at the cabin and enjoy. Other things have included some plane old fashioned helping out stuff like working equipment or building something.
Lots of things we like besides fun and frolic in the bedroom, but we like that too.
What is up with Swingular and Drama? - - Drama is on every swinger forum because, just like every other social group out there, some swingers never really graduated from junior high.
There will always be the people that thrive on drama or have to build themselves up by causing others grief. Also : Anonymity on the internet empowers douche bags. These two factors combined explain away a lot.
Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - [quote=NAUGHTYGIRL101][quote=HARD_STONE][quote=EDANY0178]DVP? [/quote]
I'll take either opening that I'm allowed in.
[img]http://www.swingular.com/photos/h/HARD_STONE%7B19832287654f28ccd1ec598%7D.jpg[/img]
[/quote]
Uummm...i think this is one topic that "just average" would be an advantage...at least for us less "experienced" girls lol...
[/quote]
Either one of you ladies would be a pleasure.
What's the universal swinger signal? - How can you spot a swinger?? - [quote=CARRIERMAN]As T4REAL69 has already said, this is an old topic that's been hashed and rehashed here on the Forums more times than any of us can count. And I always answer the question the same way. How can you tell if someone is a Swinger? "If you look over in the other bed, and see a man fucking your wife, while you're fucking his, there's a pretty good chance they're Swingers."[/quote]
hahahahaha
BTW I thought sharing is caring was a swinger saying.... if not then I'm suggesting it and printing it on tshirts and vinyl this weekend for cars/whatever... let me know if you want any and I'll get with you on the prices...
Soft-core roll call - A call out to those interested in the softer side. - [quote=PARTYINLV]Canvas,
It sounds like you and your wife are not quite on the same page yet, which is quite normal at the beginning of exploring the Lifestyle. You are looking for friendships with those who are in a similar situation. That's a good idea, but be prepared that even those friendships may be fleeting as the chemistry or level of comfort may still be different.
At the beginning of our lifestyle journey, my wife and I were just as you are today, (I was also at a different level as my wife too). TheFunCouple offers excellent advice on going to meet & greets. I also add that you might want to check out a place like Sea Mountain Inn in Palm Springs. There you can see how comfortable it is to be nude in front of others and witness all the different levels of the lifestyle. You will have opportunities to talk to others and learn more. There is no pressure to play. Plus, you will be out of Utah and away from people who might recognize you.
If you are adventurous enough, maybe plan a vacation to Temptations Resort in Mexico. This resort is not truly a lifestyle resort but is a lifestyle friendly resort since so many non swingers go there. It still is a sexually charged resort. You will meet a lot of people who are similar to you there and you have a whole week to be relaxed, get into vacation mode, and explore your steps into the lifestyle together without judgement or pressure.[/quote]
Thanks. I'm totally fine with my wife not wanting to be with another man. And she's ok with me being comfortable with another woman. So, not being on the same page doesn't cause issues as much as it adds to the challenges.
Any way, I completely agree with you and TheFunCouple about meeting people in person, going to meet-and-greets, etc. That would be the best way to meet and get a feel for people. Two problems with that for us though: 1) We live in Podunk i.e., a long ways from Lifestyle events and 2) neither of us likes parties or any sort of large social gatherings. We're not hermits or socially awkward. It's just not our thing.
I appreciate your post as well as the others.👍
Anyone else in or near Daybreak? - We know you are out there! - [quote=MEOWMIX10000][quote=PLAYNW3]What ever came of the Daybreak swingers Facebook page? Is it active and being used?[/quote]
pretty slow. a couple people talk and post pics. most people just lurk. We need more people. Could be a great group[/quote]
We worry about our kids etc finding it, that's why we haven't joined the Facebook group. We'd like to hear what's going on but really don't trust Facebook for this type of communication.
We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - we must say wtf ... lol who in their right mind would walk out on such a couple ::: scraches head::: omg ..... but thats why we play with singles hubby is a voyour so we play mostly with single guys no drama lol they cum and they go lol ..
Eureka ATV UTV Poker Run - Elks lodge charity - [quote=HRNYCOUPLETK]Love the idea and could be available this weekend. Is it trail rated atvs? Or our rzr900 be ok. Maybe we could get some more swingers to show up.[/quote]
It will be on mostly county and old mining roads, perfect for your 900.
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