Fayetteville Swingers in North_carolina

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We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - One thing we have that works pretty well is, certain phrases or a look that if one of us isn't too excited about proceeding further or theres something wrong, all we need to do is say it and then your spouse knows and things slow down. This is mostly addressed to the other couple as it seems as though they wasnt on the same page.

Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - and this

Do you long for your "vanilla" friends? - Have you been with any? - [quote=theseduction747]Being new to Utah I can not imagine how you deal with friends here with all the LDS people here. But it appears there are more LDS that have a secret side than people realize. Now how to find that out may be the trick. I always cut up and joke so they would be able to get the hint so they could decide on making the move or not. If you comment in a fun way in a joking environment eventually information will start being revealed. If not they are probably not into it and you can always excuse it as joking or cutting up. lol I have found out more than I wanted to know from some friends of ours over the years. Even some we had no interest in. It is just my nature to cut up a make funny comments. So they get comfortable talking back. That can backfire too lol. [/quote] The feeling we've gotten from chatting privately with people here is that a good percentage of swingers in Utah are indeed LDS, whether active or inactive. Appears too a good number are former LDS members cutting loose. With no judgement or disrespect to the LDS reading this, I find it fascinating. At any rate, thanks for the post and good idea with joking around.

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FREE STAY! Swingers Party in the Caribbean at our beach house on - We would like to host a few couples at our beach house in Culebra, Puerto Rico. - We would love more information!

Those damn single men! - Where do they fit in this lifestyle? - I always seem to bring up the dead topics because I don't forum check every day, just when I can't sleep... I get asked a lot where single men fit in swinging, since we openly invite them into our play time and I loved TequilaRose's response. Thank you for putting the perfect words down for me. And I quote so all can read them again, as I find them truly important to understand: "...singles can be swingers. swinging is not a "couple" only thing. Swinger or Libertine means that you are not bound by moral restraint when you engage in sex. In other words, you don't need to honor the "holy matrimonial sanctity" of a married couple, whether you are in the married couple or wishing to engage in sex with them. So I still contend that a swinger can not be pigeon holed as a swapping couple only. " Swapping is partner exchange, swinging is open minded people be they male, female, straight, gay, or bi, married or single. The original poster wanted to know good advice for the single male to be picked out of the see of choices, and here are my criteria, which btw are things I say long before I arrange to sleep with them. 1. Never approach me (in person or email) and just say "wanna fuck" It's never funny, and always gets you a no thanks. If you like my profile, say something, don't just "someone likes you" It makes you look like a picture hunter and I'll delete it without even looking at you. 2. Listen to and adhear to my personal 'rules' which are: you are not my new best friend. I don't want daily text messages or phone calls. If I was looking for phone sex, I'd call my hubby at work. I prefer the 'you free thursday at 11am?' messages. If we pick a time, stick to it. You only get one chance. You stand me up, you're history. Hubby will always know where I am and with who and will hear all the kinky details. Nothing is secret or behind his back. Hotels are on your dime, not mine. If you don't have a suitable bachelor pad for our afternoon delights, I'm gonna think you're married and lied to me Afternoons I might be able to fit you in, nights and weekends I spend with hubby. When looking to play alone with a single guy, I will never pick time with you over time I could be with him. Don't even ask. 3. NO CHEATERS, ever. If I find out you're married and lied to me, I warn you up front, I will be the girl that calls her up and tells her. Might even have pics to prove it.... watch out, I bite. 4. Stick to the girls/couples rules, it's respectful, and everyones are going to be different. The above mentioned almost sound mean, but it's just upfront. The men I've met are more than happy to adhere to my rules of conduct. I have had only good experiences from the single men I've met on this site. Not all ended up regulars, but no experience was 'negative'. The only really bad swing experience we had was when we first started swinging over 8 years ago, and it was with the male half of a couple. Didn't scare us away from other couples, we just learned from it and moved on. The bashing is stupid and as soon as someone opens their mouth and lashes out at someone else opinions they drop massive IQ points in my book. Too sad..... Do what makes you happy and ignore the rest. Enjoy "that you are not bound by moral restraint when you engage in sex" :) Mrs Curious

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Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - Exactly, so instead of saying your a swinger, you should use specifics. Like we are full-swap or we are soft-swap or we are seek polyamory. We are all swingers. It's like saying we are all human, but we have uniquity in ethnicity. I agree that labels help. However, the label swinger doesn't apply to full-swap. It's simply not the way the word was intended. It's not what it means. "Full swap" means "full swap". Swinger means someone that deviates from the moral a social norms of their society with regard to sex. Libertine encompasses swinging because it falls under the scope of being morally unrestrained. I am a libertine by definition and swinging is only one aspect of that word. There was a couple here not too long ago that was spreading intolerance by telling others they weren't swingers because they didn't "full swap". I called bullshit. This is far from the truth. I think tactics like that are used to pressure people that aren't comfortable with full swap into swapping. WE ARE ALL SWINGERS. -D-

Calling all losers! - LS and club scene - ...........................................I am bored on a Sunday, so going to waste a bit of time. :) I have said this before and I will mention it again here. Often times people are looking for a black and white answer, a "this" or "that" or they tend to pigeonhole themselves into a place that feels comfortable to them. It is great that people can search for and find people of similar interests. The original question was why is the Utah scene so closely related to the club scene. To me, that isn't necessarily the way things are and so I am responding to shed a different insight into the question. How big is the club scene in Utah? I don't feel it is that big. We have the Moose Lounge on Fridays on a regular basis, we used to have Habits and then we have the parties that happen once a month or less frequently, such as the Sinful parties. Give or take a few other club locations and attendees. The average attendance at the Moose Lounge is around 80 people every Friday. My guess is that this number is well under 10% of the swinging population in the area. Just estimating. This only happens once a week. If we only consider the weekend as play time (Friday and Saturday), which is also an inaccuracy since people do meet weekdays and Sunday as well, that means that only 5% of the population of swingers is actually attending the swinger club scene on the weekends. Certainly not a majority by any means. Sinful is definitely a club scene. And maybe we should define "club". I will say that is an environment where there is a DJ or another form of music, often times on the loud side as people like to dance, has a dance area for such activities, and typically doesn't open until 9 or so at night. Sinful probably hosts on average 150 people on average (S&A, don't get mad if this number is off,lol) and these happen maybe once a month. Lets just round this high and say that is 20% of the swinger population. However, many that attend the Moose and other clubs are the same that attend Sinful. Similar crowd and often an overlap. So still nowhere near a majority, or even a large percent. In fact, quite the opposite. This scene is well in the minority. So I am submitting that this really isn't and accurate assessment of the situation and based on more of a sense or feeling than actual fact. What this tells us then is that most of the people in the lifestyle are not meeting at clubs and are not necessarily dancing and staying up until all hours of the night but are finding other avenues where they meet. What other options are out there. Venus Game night, Kandy K, Sensual Massage... These venues are not club scenes, are a relaxed place and quiet enough to talk without "using hand signals". There still might be music and a dance floor, but there are certainly quite areas to talk, socialize and sometimes even fuck, if that is your scene. I would estimate that as many or more people attend these type of events and for most of these it is an older crowd who is more apt to be in bed at an earlier hour, though that is also an assumption and assumptions are obviously a poor way to derive information or determine a truth. I would question if any of the people in this forum have attending these more mellow parties and what they didn't like about that. The loud music is gone, it is a great way to meet many nice, non-pushy people with similar interests and since the crowd is a bit more mature (probably not the Venus parties) then there would be people of similar interests there. Now it may be of benefit of the party hosts to start earlier, say 6 or 7, so the activities can finish up earlier and I'm sure the hosts would entertain that if it was a common complaint. Apart from these types of parties and club scenes the only other way to meet people in a group setting are house parties, although keep in mind the Sinful hosts to things outside of the club but the crowd will usually still be the same people who attend the Sinful Club parties so are probably younger and okay with staying up late and partying, so probably not for the majority of people responding on this forum looking for an early-to-bed group. Let's talk about house parties. The ones we host sometimes have upwards of 60 or 70 people. These are people we have met before, for the most part, and we don't invite random people to these. We have an area to dance, music, but also areas that are quiet. The party starts around 7 and goes until... whenever. 6 am at times, but many leave before that. These aren't orgy parties and people don't show up expecting that. We also do game nights where we have 3-5 couples over for games, drinks, no dancing, hot tub, etc. Also people we know. We have been to many house parties as well and it is usually people we have met before. We are very leery of parties where there is some expectation to show up and fuck. We avoid these. Not our scene. But these house parties are out there. The doors close at 9, naked by 10, fucking by 1015. You are expected to fuck someone. Definitely not for us but definitely an okay and acceptable thing for others. Judgment is such an incredibly hypocritical thing in the lifestyle and I am astounded by how many people judge others. It is one thing to not enjoy a certain thing and to stay away from it, but it demean it, negate the validity of it and try to reduce the people who do it is completely asinine. My point is there is a variety, a full spectrum to every aspect of the lifestyle. From people looking only to make friends to people only looking to fuck. There is no right and wrong or black and white. We have so many good friends now that we feel super fortunate and blessed every day. But how did we meet those friends. Here is the key. Through hard work. Through dinner dates, clubs, social events, house parties and networking. Remember, this is my opinion, so please, readers, don't get offended. If you limit yourself to one avenue your success will be limited and you will have very few options in finding that fun couple that you click with. Many of our friends that we have met at a club typically like to be in bed at 10, or sometimes like to stay up late. Some of the people we have met in the most casual environment turn out to be crazy, fun party animals. I'm not saying if you don't attend the clubs you won't find what you are looking for especially since we have already determined that the club scene is so small. What I am saying is that if you are expecting a one-stop shop, or a fix-all, your success will be super limited. Your goal, I believe, is to meet as many people as possible and then sort through those you like and don't like until you are satisfied with your results. If you label the "club scene" as negative in your own mind, you might also be inadvertently labeling other fun activities and only reinforcing the confirmation bias you already have. Don't limit yourself to one way of finding friends, especially since it sounds like it isn't working that well for you now. We have found friends in every imaginable situation. Single dates, group dates, vacations, house parties and yes, clubs. I know our way works simply by the amount of amazing people that surround us and we call friends, and yes, some friends with benefits. Taking the time to start a topic is a good idea. The people on here all seem to have a similar interest and maybe some of you will take advantage of that, meet, and if things align, you make new friends. Maybe there is a need for a group to form that meets around 6 and finishes around 10 where only wine is served and only soft music is playing in the background. If so, take the initiative and form such a group. Create your own success. Maybe there needs to be a better way to post smaller events where only a few couples are going camping, coffee drinking, or similar. And maybe it is on Swingular and just not being utilized correctly. I'm sure with enough feedback the site could be fitted with such a feature. So don't despair. There are many, many people with similar interests and needs. You just have to find them. Each scene and venue has positives and negatives. Try to focus on the negative and utilize the resources that they are and you just might find your holy grail of FWB or what else it is you are looking for. Good job on the topic and hopefully that perfect couple is just around the corner. Mr. SRO...................................................................................................

Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - [quote=UTHOTCPLEXTREME]Ok, yeah HPV is fair enough. But I know we don’t have it. And we’d like to keep it that way.[/quote]Agreed hence the vaccine. Men cannot be tested for it and can pass it onto women unknowingly. To be clear not trying to hijack the discussion by any means. Just pointing out vaccines for such is a good idea especially in group settings where everyone is being a little more free with sharing [em]Emo_94[/em] .