Hollowville Swingers in New_york

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Swinging clubs/locations - - We went out last night. Button Down was full of Chads and Bros and the dance floor was small and uncomfortably crowded. No swingers in sight—just a bunch of kids (seriously, I felt really old there at 36). We bailed at about midnight and went to Moose Lounge and it looks completely closed down forever (**EDIT**: Moose Lounge is still open, it was just apparently either closed or just REALLY dead that night). We were very sad and went back to the hotel for our own after party by ourselves (which went very well for the record). We really liked Friday night moose lounge in the past, I hope something like that starts up again.

What's the universal swinger signal? - How can you spot a swinger?? - With my ex, we 'recruited' a lot of people into the lifestyle. We simply flirted and saw where it went. If they're in the lifestyle, they'll know what is happening, if they're not but open, they'll figure it out pretty quickly, if they're not and not open to it, flirting with a couple isn't a good thing, they'll walk away. Locally, there's a nudist resort, not all nudists are swingers and not all swingers are nudists, so to find out, simply talk, drop a hint, etc. that's all we did.

How to get Girl on GIRL...solo??? - trying to find that elusive, no drama, chick - I'll chime-in reiterating what other have said. First, the reason these single females disappear, never meeting you is because they are horny guys playing online games and looking at pictures to get-off. Second, we agree with Thoughtgarden 100%. EVERY FMF we've had came from the most unexpected place when we weren't even looking at the moment. These are women we met at non-swinger parties, night clubs, etc. I think this is because for the most part, unlike single guys, single women are not actively pursuing threesomes and moresomes. Single women are not creating the number of profiles on swingers sites like single men. If they happen, great. If they don't, that's okay too. It's now that they aren't interested, they're just not out there pursuing it on a daily basis. A couple of suggestions: 1) Look everywhere. Remember when you used to go out to clubs by yourself or with a friend when you were single and you'd meet someone? Same thing, except now you're doing it as a couple. Instead of boy picking-up girl, or girl picking-up guy, it's now couple picking-up girl. You are BOTH dating her, not just one of you. 2) Couples is a good place to start, even if you are not interested in full swap right now. Going to the meet and greets and getting to know people and them getting to know you helps. You may find a couple that is okay with playing solo and would love to fulfill your fantasy with wifey playing with you two. But, if you don't get out there and get known to people you'll never find them. Good luck! And keep trying. We were in the lifestyle as a full swap couple for quite a while before our first FMF, and it literally came-out of thin air when we were least expecting it.

Too old ???? - - [quote=SUNRISE]The person(s) who outed you obviously has a profile themselves, otherwise they would not be able to see your profile. And if they can see any of your photos other than the first cover photo, then they have a paid membership. So by outing you, they have also outed themselves. Except they don't care that people know about them being Swingers and believe it or not we used to be friends. My husband has a high profile job and it was quite a blow to the face when we found out.

Are swingers moral? - Who determines what morals are? - I figure that the golden rule, kharma, and working to better myself as a whole are good morals and make me moral and whatever. lulz. And as far as people thinking morals making you a good person... pretty sure you can be a good person with or without god. :P

Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - I was looking through the forum subjects and when I came upon this one and looked I wondered why I hadn't commented, since I am a swinger and am poly for quite a few years and I am involved with 2 women as secondary relationships. Someone said "poly is about being monogomous within a plural relationship." The term monogamous doesn't even enter into poly. Poly relationships can be primary, secondary or tertiary. Further people can be added on add-infinitem, so long as everyone involved in particularly primary and soemtimes secondary relationships are consentual about that aspect. In tertiary relationships it is necessary that that they be aware of all other relaionships and OK with that concept. I also belong to a Poly group that is not like Yahoo or AOL groups. It is privately owned and is open to poly and poly friendly people. While I know that a small number of the group does swing, they do not advertise. Poly people generally take issue with swinging as be strictly recreational SEX! and no love where as poly, supposedly, is love based not necessarily any sex....but sex usually is involved at some level. The attitude is that swinging is not a good thing that swinging is diametrically opposed to poly. We definitely do swing and I have 2 secondary relationships. One could be a primary if she could get over the hurt from a failed..abusive marriage of 18 years. We met thru swinging and will continue until I can't walk talk or motovate. My wife while not professing to be poly is in love with that lady as well as I am. We would invite her to join us as a primary relationship and have mentioned that to her... She is afraid to "lay my heart out and have it stomped on again". So while there are some similarities in swinging and poly in that more and more swingers are looking for relationships, i.e., "friends with benefits" ; "Friends in and out of the bedroom". These friendships are based on attraction and sex after the attraction. Poly people take the concept that poly is based on loving someone and if sex happens then OK, but that love is the key and sex is at best secondary. I don't have any problems with poly and swinging. We have met people while swinging and I have fallen in love or they have fallen in love with my wife or me. Swinging and poly are definitely compatable..at least for us.

Stabbing at swingers party? - - A stabbing in Herriman over the weekend has the media reporting it was a "swingers party". I am assuming this is because as the news reports a few couples "got frisky" in the basement, causing several people to reportedly leave and return less than an hour later and stab the party's 22-year old host. The three suspects were all 20 to 22 years old, also. Does anyone know anything about this? Was it a vanilla party gone wrong in a drunken moment, causing some guys to get extremely jealous and now the media is blowing this up to be a "swingers" party? Or was it really a swingers party?

What would you do? - what does a person do when their spouse no longer wishes to paticipate - There have been a lot of valid and reasonable points made. My fiancee and I are swingers, and we enjoy seeing each other with the same sex, as well as, the opposite sex. We have sat down and discussed it at great lengths. Like Tequila stated, it is recreational, it does not define our relationship. We like to meet as a couple, and we play as a couple, never separately. That is us, and how we swing. I agree that they must sit down and discuss it. Not sure about the counseling. I think they work it out between themselves. I wish them the best! Ron

Swingers on a Cruise - - Thanks for the great info!

Question - do you talk about other swingers? - We never use names just describe situations to illustrate what type of things we do. The only time I could imagine using names is if you went to house party and all concerned know you were all there. Then would use general terms of what mutual experiences we had at the party but no specifics we may have done with the people on a one on one basis. Discretion is paramount.