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Tooele swingers party 2 - Doing our second party - [quote=NIPPLESNNUGGETS]Date?[/quote]
Nipplesnuggets: Just an FYI, your profile picture is SMALL. Looks like you uploaded a thumbnail by mistake.
Age - New to the swingers community - is age a factor in how a couple is viewed? - I have been swinging since the days it was called wife swapping. I am not interested in those under mid 30's and perfer to stay under age 55 as my preference. I like to be able to converse with those I play with 1 on 1, and the younger crowd leaves me with little to talk about. Also having a son in that age range makes it awkward for me. At parties I am not paying attention to an age range though, I pay attention to what sexy nymph catches my eye....
Xmas carols for swingers. - - ...or pawn stars.
Playing Alone - - Couples all have different rules. Many categorically refuse to play alone with ANYONE ever. This is their "security" place. They feel comfortable in the place where they can see each other and "protect" if necessary. It takes some people a long time to get passed this.
It's kind of a 'control' thing leftover from the vanilla life. I'm not saying it's bad, good or indifferent it's just the way it is. Some people take longer to get passed their histories as vanillas than others. As they progress and get more comfortable with themselves, the lifestyle, their partners then they will slowly open up and begin to trust a bit more.
Don't take it personally, that's the key. Many people still hang on to their vanilla background that their partners are their most 'valued' possession. I liken it to my $450 deep sea fishing reel. Sure I'll loan it to someone to use if I'm on the boat with them and can make sure they're taking care of it. Is there anyone I'd just let 'borrow' it out right for the day or weekend? Not a chance in hell.
It takes time to let go of that 'she's/he's mine' get feeling. I think my wife and I took almost 6 years before we got there successfully. We tried many times before that but it never worked out well for either of us. We finally came to a point where it's okay to play separately everything from next room to next state it no longer bothers us. I personally prefer within 30 - 50 miles so she get's home faster for the "after play" sex you're describing (which I really like too.)
You'll have to find a VERY secure, VERY established, VERY strong couple to fulfill your fantasy. They are out there, my wife and I for example but even though we're open to playing separately are we open to YOU playing with her or me separately? That's a different level of trust. Does it mean no? No. It means "maybe" in time it's a possibility. (I'm speaking hypothetically of course.)
Don't worry your "couple" or "person" will come along. You might also try investigating a subsection of the lifestyle called "hotwifeing" while I know few swingers who are hardcore into only hotwifing, there are quite a few that tip toe in that part of the lifestyle (quick def, she plays he doesn't except with her.) That's the post play joy for you and the play and post play joy for her. Most people just bounce between that and swinging. There are people out there just be patient and don't expect it from any current playmates that you have established rules with, they need to progress at their own speed.
Being Stood Up - Sucks to be stood up - [quote=UTAH-CPLE-2006]carrier, now thats just funny. that said, swingers are as a rule flakes its gonna happen so we recomend just meeting someplace you would go anyway that way when people flake off you can just enjoy your evening without them.[/quote]
great advice
Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - Ok, This is going to insult an awful lot of people. You
Facebook group - - I also belong to another Facebook swingers page based out in the NE too. Philly area mostly. Not many people in our area on that page.
Wear your damn masks! - COVID-19 and your junk! - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]We can’t just wander around COSTCO not wearing a condom and give the people around us an STD. Yes as lifestyle people we are already somewhat predisposed to a somewhat riskier social life than what a lot of other people might find acceptable for themselves. With a virus that’s airborne it’s not that difficult to pass it along with out the consent or such close proximity a sex to those around us. Hence, the mask recommendations. Swingers that don’t understand respect an or consent, will tend create drama.[/quote]
Amen. Particularly the last sentence in your opine.
Same room only? - Our new approach - Actually, you're sort of lucky that people who wrote you back try to talk you into doing more at that early juncture instead of the all too common ploy where they think they can convince you to do more once you're all getting ready to play or actually playing.
It all comes down to a matter of respect and a lot of swingers, sadly, are just too concerned about their own desires and agenda and think they can persuade you to go beyond your rules and limits once you see how amazingly hot they are and realize how utterly lucky you are to be able to be with them at all. Yes, that last little part was sarcasm.
Pink flamingo - How many swingers have a pink flamingo in their front yard? - oohh. i like those!
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