Bullville Swingers in New_york

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Single Males - - [quote=CTA313][quote=EVILDOERS] ...get a girl to join you....Not only do you now "bring more to the table", but you have the added credibility that if you can find and finesse a girl into joining you in this little adventure we call swinging (whether it be a girlfriend, a wife, a second cousin twice removed, or just a hot fwb) you might just not be a giant douchecopter.[/quote] Ignoring the need to "finesse" someone and unhealthy gender stereotypes in general, this line of reasoning is a little troubling as it presumes that a male's company is inherently worth less. Or that an absence of semi-romantic relationships somehow speaks poorly of his character. I personally think approaching someone whom you aren't already fairly close with and soliciting to go to a swingers party is a bit out of line. Especially if her company is sought as an accessory to demonstrate to others that he is not, as you say, “a douchecopter”. Call me old-fashioned. [quote=EVILDOERS] I know we can't be the only people who secretly wonder just a little bit about some single guys and why they aren't with somebody. Do they secretly hate women (yes, we've met some that actually do), are they just too lazy (or busy, maybe...but hey, we're all busy) to find someone, are they serial killers and/or just not very nice guys? [/quote] Oh, I hope you are! That's a really unfortunate outlook to have. Promising relationships take time to find, let alone build to the requisite amount of trust and stability to try things like this. In the mean time, I don't see anything wrong with someone pursuing their interests while still holding out for someone worthy of their emotional investment. To me, that behavior is quite attractive should be respected! It doesn't get any better than someone who is confident, self-actualized, and motivated to pursue their desires. Sadly, it sounds their gender influences whether this is seen as a desirable trait. I'm not sure how long you've been out of things (30 years?), but it's easy to forget the struggle when you're comfortable in a marriage. Things are more fluid. People don't feel the need to settle down like they used to. [quote=EVILDOERS]I know many will say they've tried and swinging is a deal breaker for most women. After almost 3 decades in the swinging trenches meeting and talking to other people, both couples and singles, we would disagree....many, if not most, women could eventually come around to the idea of swinging once they feel safe and secure in a relationship.[/quote] This is just confirmation bias if the evidence comes from a sample of people you have met while swinging. [quote=EVILDOERS]...those of us who DID put in all the blood, sweat, and tears into a relationship and allow it to grow to the point of daring (don't think for a second we aren't risking a LOT in opening up our relationships to other people!) to allow others access to our significant other sometimes wonder why some others want to take a shortcut to all the sweet swinging bennies with little or no risk on their own part.[/quote] If you're not comfortable sharing your wife with someone you might view as a potential competition, you definitely don't have to. On the other hand, there are a lot of people enjoy it :) This smacks of the old “you must suffer as I did” chestnut. [/quote] Yes, I agree, "finesse" was a poor choice of words. In my defense, I was at work and rather in a hurry to make a point...that apparently I didn't make well (and my attempts to also be humorous apparently fell flat too). Rereading my post it does smack a little of mild gender bias but I can assure you that it wasn't my intent in any way and most certainly is not my outlook on women, relationships or life in general. My intent was simply to advocate approaching swinging as a mutually desirable activity that two partners desire and share equally in. And not that it matters, but I've shared my wife with probably over a hundred men, married and single, and I've never thought of any of them as competition. But I never thought of swinging as "sharing" my wife either, but instead as her deciding to be sexual with another person and me being totally okay with her decision to do so. Sharing her, to me, almost denotes some sort of ownership or at very least some kind of permission that I would have to give. Both those ideas are not a part of our relationship. Perhaps the concept of "competition" in swinging interactions is a single male attitude? I don't know. And I didn't mean it in any way, shape, or form as a "you must suffer as I did" trope but simply as the idea that we invested a LOT of hard work and time making our marriage what it is and together deciding to risk opening it up to the excitement and also the possibility of harm that is swinging. I think, perhaps, that sometimes single people in the lifestyle don't quite understand the very real possibility of permanent damage (or worse) to the relationship that couples who swing are flirting with. For many (most?) of us, our marriages/relationships are THE most precious thing we have. What, if anything, are you risking? A bruised ego?

Seeking mormon swingers - - We will spend the summer in SLC and would love to meet with as many mormon swinger couples and singles as we can. In our experience, married mormon couples are the best swingers ever! They are simply super freaks in bed, ladies like to wear their strap-ons, gentlemen like to wear their sassy schoolgirl outfits, mormon single men give the best head ever and not to forget about mormon single girls who love anal so they remain intact before marriage. We had a single mormon female friend and I swear she'll speak in tongues as my wife, using her trusty strap-on, and myself DP her. Where do mormon swingers hang out? How to we approach a mormon couple about swiging at the temple?

Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - [quote=UTBIPLAYMATE][quote=EDANY0178][quote=UTCPL][quote=UTBIPLAYMATE]We would love to try both DP and DVP. It's one of my favorite fantasies!! ;)[/quote] We've done dvp a few times & love it. Never dp though. [/quote] Would love to help you out with that[/quote] We would love to have someone to show us the ropes!! ;)[/quote] would love to sexies

We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - Perfect post TG! Weve had a couple of interesting experiences, we learn from it and try to recognize the red flags when they pop up.

can we swing and still not be in sin ? - - NPNUDISTCPLE thanks for your reply i do understand that some people have issues with god well , i don't !!! i might have issues with religion but never with god , in this thread i was looking to get info. from people that are swingers and believers in god and find no contradictions doing so , and find out witch religion they follow and how they practice swinging and so i only would like them to reply i do know some basics witch i shared with all here like the diff. with singles or couples of other religions , males only or females only rule but want to know more like is it from god or is it from religion if it is from religion witch one , if you don't know or don't want to know just skip this thread .

Swingulars Outage - What really happened - As everyone knows, our dear Swingular recently suffered an outage. It has been a painfull 5 days or so for all members of Swingular, and we wish to take a moment to console you for the pain. OK.. Now that the moment is over, here is what happened... As we all know, Swingular is a site that involves many people in a particular lifestyle. This lifestyle represents many \"UPs\" and \"DOWNs\", much cumming and going, a lot of flirting, a few drinks and quite often \"HARD\" times. Well the server seems to have been taking the brunt of the abuse, expected to be \"UP\" and ready to perform at a moments notice. Not by one partner, but often by several thousands of people at the same time. After several years af sexual gratification to so many people.. The servers \"HARD\" drive failed. It just didn\'t have what it took to get it \"UP\" one more time. It was drained, no more \"JUICE\" of life left in it. (The sticky substance was everywhere except where it needed to be.) Yes friends, leave it to a swing site to have HARD drive failure... To top it off, it is my estimation that someone said the wrong thing to the hard drive, for after it was replaced with a newer model, the old drive just refused to \"MOUNT\", the best I can figure is that someone, somewhere at sometime convinced the HARD drive that it wasn\'t supposed to \"SWING THAT WAY\". Yes, we now have a failed HARD drive that refuses to MOUNT..... Only at a swingers site... Well we now have a fresh new HARD drive, ready for years of use and abuse, it is better than a Sybien Sex Machine as it is able to give satisfaction to multiple partners without having to stand in line. And now for what REALLY happened..... We were attacked by the Moral Majority... It appears they don\'t agree with our MORALITY... I say to them, GET OVER IT... This is OUR LIFE, OUR LIFESTYLE.... If ya don\'t like it... Go Fluck yourself!

Friend collectors or swingers - - We love to meet new people! That said though......the way we tend to meet them is either at a Meet and Greet or at a house party. If they happen to send us a friend request, and it is someone we think we would like to get to know, we invite them to one of our own frequent house parties. Unfortunately, neither of those avenues are happening right now for us. We have accepted a number of friend requests this year with hopes of inviting them to a small house party soon.....but not until we feel pretty confident it is safe for all involved. A fact I know some want to ignore, but we have personally known two friends in the lifestyle that didn't survive the virus. We don't want to know anymore. So we wait a bit longer.

YOLO Cruise April 26 2009 - swingers cruise - we are all booked can't wait ,looking forward to making lots of friends this will be our 5th but this will be the best lol

Invatation to swingers. - open letter against Dr. Phil - Agree'd to each his own ! we are a Very open couple and we play with couples that need to be discreet ! but when it come's to us . We DONT give a Rat's Ass if some dont like us for who we are or what we do ? We Love the Lifestyle and the people in it ! only people who dont get laid enough seem to complain about the Lifestyle ? All we can say is "Go Get Laid" and Clean up your Own Back Yard First !

Friend collectors or swingers - - My opinion, which hasn't changed in ages, is this, and I'm not chastising anyone, just offering my 2 cents. One of the recurring and biggest problem that swingers face is that they decide what they personally like, or want, and then assume everyone else should choose the same path or they don't understand why how everyone else doesn't feel the same way they do. I've read the forum posts for years and the same questions recirculate on a regular basis. "Why don't people want to be the type of swingers we are?" "We don't want friends, we just want to have sex." "We don't necessarily want to have sex until we are friends." "We really only want friends but rarely play." All valid forms of the lifestyle and perfectly acceptable to different people. The lifestyle can take work. It typically isn't easy and will take some time and effort to achieve your lifestyle goals. Sure it's helpful to post your desires in your profile but I'm sure people read those only rarely, or maybe they are drunk searching, or maybe they can't read. :) There are all types. Try not to get frustrated because someone else isn't following you lead. Be patient. Within one or two convos you should be expressing your goals and figuring out the goals of the people you are trying to get to know. Get a system that weeds out the people you are't interested in, something that works for you. You will get better with time and hopefully someday what you are looking for will be much easier to find. However, until then, realize life isn't black and white, nor is swinging. There are as many varieties of swingers as there are ice cream flavors, or flavored condoms. haha. Don't expect others to want the same thing as you but certainly look for those that do. Be patient, kind and realize everyone is possibly looking for a different scenario than you. Some people love to send blind requests, some hate it. Right or wrong, it's life. Accept that there is mound of bullshit between you and that perfect couple/single male/female/trans/group/poly/donkey/toys only/DTF.... (Well, you get the point we are all looking for something different)that you are looking for. So don't be frustrated. Accept it will be a challenge and work on better ways to make your life easier. There won't be a good answer only many shades of grey. "Don't try to bend the spoon, for that is impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth... there is no spoon. Then you will see it is not the spoon that bends, it is only yourself." And to the single males that post ridiculous stuff? WTF? Ugh. You make us all look like mentally disabled Neanderthals. "Me have dick. Me like pussy. Stick it good."