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Age - New to the swingers community - is age a factor in how a couple is viewed? -
Don said...
We view the lifestyle as a multifaceted creature. The sex part being a benefit. In order for a person to want to have sex, they have to be attracted to the other person in some way shape or form.
For some, age is an issue. Should we fault them?? I think not. Just as we've discussed in other threads about D&D, Smoking, Sexual Practices etc. The list is long. I think this has to do with preference. Are some people picky yes. Don't let their decision hamper your good time. There are many couples that this is an issue. Most people's taste doesn't change because someone complains. I say move on.
We don't have an issue with age so much as we do attitude and personality. As some of you well know, I (Don) am very opinionated and love to say what's on my mind. Some don't like that. Some thing I am a prick. For those of you that think that...
Anyway, as we say in the Army, suck up and drive on. Don't let rejections rule your outlook, let your successes. Good luck.
-D-
Just looking for other couples happy with super soft and no swap - There must be more of us out there? - [quote=TATERTOT1982]Im very glad Im in the vegas swingers scene and not utah anymore.....[/quote]
Interesting statement, we've often wondered about our perception that Utah lifestylers are a little more "odd", for lack of a better word??? Due to the heightened possibility of "social engineering" (AKA LDS).
As for doing it alone w/doors closed and no one watching in a club - we can understand that "thrill" level. I think the most important thing is that they dont lead people on to thinking there's going to be more before doing that. THAT would be rude, self centered and dis-respectful. I think this is the fine line where people get a little "ruffled" at the many levels of "comfort" in this lifestyle - its tough to get all turned on and revved up then shut out (usually what guys are used to getting from women - lol)...
Disabled Swingers - - "Disabled" is one of those heavily loaded but so vague it's actually meaningless words that our pop culture loves so much. This is a subject I am profounding involved in both personally and professionally.
For example, did you know that alcoholism can be a disabling disease under federal regulations, and that alcoholics are protected under the Americans with Disabilities Act just like a child with Cerebral Palsy or a quadriplegic adult trauma survivor in a motorized wheelchair? That's a pretty wide range of conditions and causation! Woudn't you agree?
I am a disabled veteran. A huge percentage of former NFL football players and professional fighters have "disabilities." Some CURRENT players do, too! I have a quadriplegic friend who has climbed Mt. Everest. I know an Army Sargeant who is serving in combat in Iraq and Afghanistan after losing both of his legs. And I know alcoholics whom I wouldn't trust to take out the trash.
So this all seems very subjective, doesn't it? That's because it is! You cannot put people with disabilities in a box any more than you can people without disabilities. Therefore, it is equally impossible to know in advance whether or not you would be sexually attracted to them. You will have to meet them, get to know them a bit, and see for yourself.
But make no mistake: "disabled" does NOT automatically apply to sex! One of the most profound Abilities of people with disAbilities, is the ability to adapt and improvise to compensate for their abnormalities. And some disabilities (like bipolar disorder, autism, etc.) are actually the OVER-abundance of things that normal people have and/or experience in smaller doses or less frequently.
I'm sure you've all heard of the medical condition "Priapism" by now. This "something wrong with you" is when the male penis remains erect no matter what...the permanent boner. This condition can be painful, embarassing, highly inconvenient, and a helluva lot of fun for awhile! But to the person toting that thing around all the time, it becomes a disability. Get the idea?
Can bieng Mormon (LDS) and a Swinger co-exist? - - Having been raised as a mormon, I always took to heart the teachings that "My Father's house has many manisions"
In my humble opinion, even the mormon church has a place in heaven for all of us swingers. The rank and file members may think and treat us differently, but in the end there is a place for all. It is impossible to reconcile the teachings of any religion with the swinger lifestyle, and we each have to make our own peace with that.
Just my 2 cents for whatever it's worth :)
Mr Closer
Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - Would be interested. Always ready to meet new people and have new adventures 😉
Identifying Swingers! - Lots of talk and now some action! :) - Oh Yea that would be great for us guys to wear......... Not really, Come on people.
Now that you're one of them there fancy swingers... - - I play as a single male (although sometimes I bring a vanilla swirl along to an event or something) but I've always had good experiences with people I meet up with. I have also had nothing but good experiences at parties, so I guess I'm pretty lucky that way. For me, the lifestyle hasn't exactly turned me into a sex snob or anything like that, but I have gotten used to the open attitudes. It has become much harder (and not in the good way) to play with vanilla females who don't have those same attitudes. Not in the sense of I'm coming on too strong or pushing boundaries harder, but just that "normal" attitudes towards sex and sexual exploration in the LS are different than those in the single scene.
LDS Swingers Survey - Will any former/active LDS swingers take my survey? - Done
Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - We think the problem is that people see the equation "sex = love". IOW, if I have sex with you, I must love you. Therefore polyamory and swinging are the same. After all, if I don't love you, I won't be having sex with you.
The way I see it, swinging is like a game of golf or tennis. I might play a game with you but I don't love you. Similarly, I might have sex with you but I don't love you.
Poly, IMO, is basically having a relationship with that other person and sex is involved on some level. Kinda like "I'm in love with you and oh, BTW, lets make love"
The way we see it, swinging is about exchanging sexual partners for recreation sex. In an orgy situation at a party, you can have sex with that person with zero words exchanged. In a poly relationship, there is a real connection going on besides just sex. Sex becomes incidental just like it is with married couples.
With swinging, there is no emotional attachment. Is that a good thing? Well, it depends. We need to understand the very simple nature of things. We do this to avoid that. That is human nature. Many swingers DON'T want emotional attachments and avoid them because of the complications they cause in the first one. Are there benefits to the attachments? You bet. Is there a price to pay for that benefit? But of course. Is it worth it to you? That depends on your viewpoint.
In our life as a couple, the problems poly cause BASED ON OUR OPINION (your's may vary and no right and wrong here) do not outweigh the payoff. IOW, we don't think the benefits of a poly relationship are worth the problems it creates based on our opinion. YMMV
Identifying Swingers! - Lots of talk and now some action! :) - Suz,
I think you are correct. Now that I look again, you have to study it a bit to really see what it is. I like it. Perhaps they should implement a color-coded gem to denote lifestyle participation. Pink and Blue to denote single female and single male. Perhaps red for a couple???
-D-
