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Roselle Park Swingers in New_jersey

Roselle Park Swingers

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Adulter or Swinger? - - Loving to dance at clubs and bars, Cyn and I frequently go out on weekends and are often met by a variety of friends. Over the years, we have accumulated a number of single females that enjoy dancing with us. One of these lovely gals enjoyed meeting attractive single men and would often end up spending the night with them. Not too long ago, somehow it was brought to her attention that Cyn and I were..... "swingers". She was furious with us and expressed her dissapproval in very clear terms. After she was through venting her feelings about how disguisting it was that we could possibley be involved in committing adultry, I took a moment to present to her a few select questions. First, she saw no wrong in spending an evening with another man in sex and carnal expressions of emotion? She responded that they were consenting adults and both single.. therefore committing no wrong to anyone. I asked if she felt it was wrong not to be monogamous with just one of these men rather than continually finding new friends to experience. Again, she responded she felt no wrong with what she was doing. Why then I asked, did she find fault with what Cyn and I were doing, as consenting adults and with full knowledge of what each was doing? She responded with the comment that "swinging" was just wrong and that as husband and wife we needed to be faithful to each other. So, I asked why it wasnt wrong for her to swing but it was for us. She retorted she WAS NOT a swinger. To that, I shared the following with her... according to every dictionary I can find, a swinger is defined as a person who engages in promiscuous sex, an adulter is a married person who has voluntary sex with another person to whom they are not lawfully married to. The realization of the fact that she was practicing swinging came as a shock. It took a few days to fully sink in, but when it finally did, she accepted us with open arms for what we are, (I guess adulters), and our friendship resumed. One very important item here to consider, too often the request to bring another single individual into our bedroom is presented with the excuse that the partner doesnt like sex anymore. The solution to their problem is to cheat... or in their mind... go swinging. In our book, these people are not swingers by definition, but cheaters. Its wrong and unfair to try to use the cloak of swinging to justify being unfaithful. Lifestyles and swinging is not a remedy to solve trouble at home. Often when we decline the request to involve people in our sexual activities for the reason their spouse is not aware or doesnt approve, we hear the rebuttle.."why not? you are swingers arent you?". What ever name we give it, people need to remember... this lifestyle is all based on a few key components. Trust, respect, and the terms YES and NO. Period. Cant we keep the labels, the slander, and the lies out of what we can find to be a productive, social, and even in many cases educational activity between honest, consenting, respectable adults?

A&E New show about swingers... - neighbors with benefits.... - Well,, did anyone watch it? What did you think? My thought,,, just another catchy title for a reality series,, not realistic necessarily,, had some good points, but looks like they are going to have some "DRAMA", ( Britanny & Mike?). So much like all the other shows,, reckon they think everyone will get all worked up in the conflict and anxiously await the next show. Probably will watch another or two,, and hope to be wrong with the direction it seems to be headed already. On the other hand,, there has been a lot of coverage here in Tn on a wingers club opening up next to a school. Look for a lot of legal action on that one I bet!

Calling all losers! - LS and club scene - ...........................................I am bored on a Sunday, so going to waste a bit of time. :) I have said this before and I will mention it again here. Often times people are looking for a black and white answer, a "this" or "that" or they tend to pigeonhole themselves into a place that feels comfortable to them. It is great that people can search for and find people of similar interests. The original question was why is the Utah scene so closely related to the club scene. To me, that isn't necessarily the way things are and so I am responding to shed a different insight into the question. How big is the club scene in Utah? I don't feel it is that big. We have the Moose Lounge on Fridays on a regular basis, we used to have Habits and then we have the parties that happen once a month or less frequently, such as the Sinful parties. Give or take a few other club locations and attendees. The average attendance at the Moose Lounge is around 80 people every Friday. My guess is that this number is well under 10% of the swinging population in the area. Just estimating. This only happens once a week. If we only consider the weekend as play time (Friday and Saturday), which is also an inaccuracy since people do meet weekdays and Sunday as well, that means that only 5% of the population of swingers is actually attending the swinger club scene on the weekends. Certainly not a majority by any means. Sinful is definitely a club scene. And maybe we should define "club". I will say that is an environment where there is a DJ or another form of music, often times on the loud side as people like to dance, has a dance area for such activities, and typically doesn't open until 9 or so at night. Sinful probably hosts on average 150 people on average (S&A, don't get mad if this number is off,lol) and these happen maybe once a month. Lets just round this high and say that is 20% of the swinger population. However, many that attend the Moose and other clubs are the same that attend Sinful. Similar crowd and often an overlap. So still nowhere near a majority, or even a large percent. In fact, quite the opposite. This scene is well in the minority. So I am submitting that this really isn't and accurate assessment of the situation and based on more of a sense or feeling than actual fact. What this tells us then is that most of the people in the lifestyle are not meeting at clubs and are not necessarily dancing and staying up until all hours of the night but are finding other avenues where they meet. What other options are out there. Venus Game night, Kandy K, Sensual Massage... These venues are not club scenes, are a relaxed place and quiet enough to talk without "using hand signals". There still might be music and a dance floor, but there are certainly quite areas to talk, socialize and sometimes even fuck, if that is your scene. I would estimate that as many or more people attend these type of events and for most of these it is an older crowd who is more apt to be in bed at an earlier hour, though that is also an assumption and assumptions are obviously a poor way to derive information or determine a truth. I would question if any of the people in this forum have attending these more mellow parties and what they didn't like about that. The loud music is gone, it is a great way to meet many nice, non-pushy people with similar interests and since the crowd is a bit more mature (probably not the Venus parties) then there would be people of similar interests there. Now it may be of benefit of the party hosts to start earlier, say 6 or 7, so the activities can finish up earlier and I'm sure the hosts would entertain that if it was a common complaint. Apart from these types of parties and club scenes the only other way to meet people in a group setting are house parties, although keep in mind the Sinful hosts to things outside of the club but the crowd will usually still be the same people who attend the Sinful Club parties so are probably younger and okay with staying up late and partying, so probably not for the majority of people responding on this forum looking for an early-to-bed group. Let's talk about house parties. The ones we host sometimes have upwards of 60 or 70 people. These are people we have met before, for the most part, and we don't invite random people to these. We have an area to dance, music, but also areas that are quiet. The party starts around 7 and goes until... whenever. 6 am at times, but many leave before that. These aren't orgy parties and people don't show up expecting that. We also do game nights where we have 3-5 couples over for games, drinks, no dancing, hot tub, etc. Also people we know. We have been to many house parties as well and it is usually people we have met before. We are very leery of parties where there is some expectation to show up and fuck. We avoid these. Not our scene. But these house parties are out there. The doors close at 9, naked by 10, fucking by 1015. You are expected to fuck someone. Definitely not for us but definitely an okay and acceptable thing for others. Judgment is such an incredibly hypocritical thing in the lifestyle and I am astounded by how many people judge others. It is one thing to not enjoy a certain thing and to stay away from it, but it demean it, negate the validity of it and try to reduce the people who do it is completely asinine. My point is there is a variety, a full spectrum to every aspect of the lifestyle. From people looking only to make friends to people only looking to fuck. There is no right and wrong or black and white. We have so many good friends now that we feel super fortunate and blessed every day. But how did we meet those friends. Here is the key. Through hard work. Through dinner dates, clubs, social events, house parties and networking. Remember, this is my opinion, so please, readers, don't get offended. If you limit yourself to one avenue your success will be limited and you will have very few options in finding that fun couple that you click with. Many of our friends that we have met at a club typically like to be in bed at 10, or sometimes like to stay up late. Some of the people we have met in the most casual environment turn out to be crazy, fun party animals. I'm not saying if you don't attend the clubs you won't find what you are looking for especially since we have already determined that the club scene is so small. What I am saying is that if you are expecting a one-stop shop, or a fix-all, your success will be super limited. Your goal, I believe, is to meet as many people as possible and then sort through those you like and don't like until you are satisfied with your results. If you label the "club scene" as negative in your own mind, you might also be inadvertently labeling other fun activities and only reinforcing the confirmation bias you already have. Don't limit yourself to one way of finding friends, especially since it sounds like it isn't working that well for you now. We have found friends in every imaginable situation. Single dates, group dates, vacations, house parties and yes, clubs. I know our way works simply by the amount of amazing people that surround us and we call friends, and yes, some friends with benefits. Taking the time to start a topic is a good idea. The people on here all seem to have a similar interest and maybe some of you will take advantage of that, meet, and if things align, you make new friends. Maybe there is a need for a group to form that meets around 6 and finishes around 10 where only wine is served and only soft music is playing in the background. If so, take the initiative and form such a group. Create your own success. Maybe there needs to be a better way to post smaller events where only a few couples are going camping, coffee drinking, or similar. And maybe it is on Swingular and just not being utilized correctly. I'm sure with enough feedback the site could be fitted with such a feature. So don't despair. There are many, many people with similar interests and needs. You just have to find them. Each scene and venue has positives and negatives. Try to focus on the negative and utilize the resources that they are and you just might find your holy grail of FWB or what else it is you are looking for. Good job on the topic and hopefully that perfect couple is just around the corner. Mr. SRO...................................................................................................

Happy Fathers Day - Hope it has ~ - Massage I think I understand where you're going. The first response I read before you edited. I think your doing what they people who classify single males in one group are doing. And broad group everyone. What you covered goes over so many different types of swingers. I'll explain me in part now and yes she reads what I type and gives me input, she just isn't into posting on sites like this. Many of us are not on here for either of us specially where on here for each other this is a swinger site I don't come here for single males. I come here to find couple's for both of us. The fact my wife didn't realize till I told her last month is when it comes to single males I'm so picky. I'm bi sexual as many know I can post on a site like grinder and I will get sexy guys in there 20s in perfect shape messaging me for hook ups. Full disclosure I don't like doing those because of fear of STDs, but the reason I say that is the market for guys is so over supplied, so if me or my wife want a single guy to play with we typically look for that else where. I don't do hook ups with guys neither does she we want relationship with guys or girls then if it comes sex. That's kind of all over the place sorry I write it on my phone. But if single guys wouldn't go against profile requests on this site I think they would have better reputation. Let's face it this is a swinger site so in my opinion single guys are more of guests that need to watch what they say do. Or get replaced. That sounds harsh but it's true. With all that said me and Brenda did find an amazing single guy on this site. But we contacted him.

Oprah show on Swingers - - Just saw a promo for Oprah's show on Swingers that will be aired on Thursday (June 29, 2006)for those that want to see what is going on in your neighborhood as it said, LOL

Island Park - Snowmobiling - We have had a couple of people interested but no commitments. Its a quick cheap getaway for all you snowmobiler swingers out there. Let us know Thanks Dave

habits tonight????? - Come on people let's go - Habits is a nightclub on 39 S. Salt Lake favorite hang out for swingers but it's hot in on Saturday night

Question - do you talk about other swingers? - We agree that name dropping is a bad thing and in the few years that we have been in this lifestyle we have only had one bad experience and the funny thing is when we vaguely describe the experience only when asked (this means NO names, ScreenNames, locations or anything like that) we ALWAYS get the same response... Ohh so you met "ScreenName" too... our mouth usually hits the floor with the "how the fuck" look. but other than that we would never kiss n tell because its no one else's business who we have or have not met or been with .

exspense of taking husband and boyfriend to party - - [quote=PITMOMMY]you know what i was originally think when i started this was that, iam masculine in my relationship with both guys, they both have more feminie than masculine qualities, then i read posts on here about homophobic guys who dont dp because they dont want to touch penises, its like wtf, then iam wondering where bi sexual men fit into this swingers community who are supposidly open mined, i would think that if this community were so open mined they would see a person as a masculine or femmine spirit, what if my bf like feminine guys, will there be any at a lifestyle party? what if a guy likes masculine women how many will be there? the closed minded nature of these parties sets the whole thing back to before the sixties, they might as well only allow straight wife swapping and no bisexual men allowed[/quote] Let's not go taking one thing and try calling it another! The topic had nothing to do with sexuality and everything to do with being too damn frugal.

Game ON....which sign is Hornier...(is that a word?) - zodiac signs of swingers? - It is probably obvious from our screenname, but we are both cancers.

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