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Why do they run? - Why do most couples run when you suggest a real full swap? - Like what was said in the post above..we are not looking to replace our mates. It\'s not the fear of replacement for us either. We tried the first time on sepreate beds, and neither of us liked it very much. We both missed each other as we could hear each other but not see. When we all moved into one bed, it was a million times better. I must confess that I get more enjoyment watching my wife get or give then I do getting it most of the time. We prefer to play all together, not as two seperate couples the whole time, such as both guys playing with one wife while the other wife is pleasing her, etc. and when we do pair off, I love to reach over and hold my wifes hand as she is coming and I love to feel her hands in my hair as I please the other wife...It\'s just what we are into.
We have zero interest in playing apart. We are very much in love and are so tuned into each other that many times it is hard just to seperate and go to work. I know we might be making some of you sick, but that is the way we are and any of you who have met us will back this up.
We are not judging, the last thing anyone needs is more judgement. If you like to split up, more power to you, it\'s not our thing and we have no interest.
If this makes us les than swingers, well then, we are less than swingers and happy :)
Have fun with what ever your thrill is!
Art and Dawn
ha just horny...How bout you? - yep horny still haha - Keep this going peeps. We are real and swingers are here!!!
Dating other Couples - Have you done it? - Been there, done that, have the t-shirt. We know plenty of people who've done it, and done it successfully (up to a point), ourselves included. We don't know of many, if any, where it has lasted for more than a few years and didn't end somewhat badly.
It CAN be quite heady and has the potential to take swinging to the next level. Unfortunately, it is also exponentially more likely to crank up the drama factor to eleven (out of ten).
Quite often each couple has their own "agenda" (for lack of a better term) that is often at odds with the other couple's agenda. We've seen it frequently cause weird jealousies not only between primary partners but also between non-primary partners and in a few extreme notable cases it has ended marriages.
In our case, we were relatively long-term swingers at that point who, although never really super active in the scene, felt like we'd checked off most of the things on our swinging bucket list and were somewhat curious if there was more out there to explore in swingerdom...or if we were sort of done with the scene.
The couple we started "dating" wasn't really the kind of couple we usually were attracted to and maybe that was part of the allure. They also had a very interesting (to say the least) dynamic in their marriage that really was at odds with that in our relationship. Ultimately they kept pushing boundaries (started throwing the "L" word around and much more), pushed for more and more separate activities and were insidious in slowly and subtly causing rifts, both large and small, as well as a LOT of drama. We actually didn't even realize how much drama and subterfuge had occurred until we were finally out of the situation entirely.
We actually miss them a little, at times, and often wonder if there might have been a way to talk things out and come to a better understanding of how to continue on in a healthier way but they've actually gone on to do exactly the same thing to a number of other couples we know (it's a small world in Utah swinging and word gets around) and it seems to be their pattern.
Tldr; It can work. It's quite rare when it works long term. It has the potential for disaster. While it's appealing in many ways we don't really recommend it. YMMV
Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - [quote=SHREDLITTLERED]May I recommend a wonderful book? The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures. Written by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy. I found this book very positive, helpful and informative. A wonderful guide to that "evolution" you are referring to. Best of luck![/quote]
Thank you so much, I will check it out. :)
Swingers Vacation Spots - Help us - We've heard that there are quite a few single men at Hedo...but the point to remember is that not all swingers go to Hedo. It's a place to be nude and many swingers are there. We've heard that even if you don't swing, it's the most relaxing vacation there could be. This is another reason we want to attend.....lots of watching others play too....hehehehe. I don't think we've ever heard anything bad about the place at all. It's a resort, therefore there are lots and lots of fun things to do....check it out online. Take care :z
RV Swingers? - - Well, shortly the wife and I will be buying a new RV and traveling full time for a few years. Is there anyone from the lifestyle that are full timers? We are pretty excited to get out and travel some and meet new peeps.
We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - Well the first and biggest thing i can see is communication, especially between the couples before they play. I dont know why its so hard to ask your partner whether it be a girl or guy if this is ok and if not just let them know. Your partner needs to know you are here together to expand your experiences and for them, not so you can be selfish and have it all for yourself.
I dont know why someone would put themselves in a situation they know from the get-go that they are gunna get jealous about. I mean your not stupid you know if your a jealous person either talk with your partner about it or dont do it.
I think the stupid male ego comes into play alot hence why you see it being us guys that start the drama. Ow is he bigger than me, ow is he better than me, ow is she gunna be thinking of him when we have sex, I mean get over yourself!!!! I saw a topic in one of the forums here bout dick size and couldnt believe how many guys are worried bout it. Personally I could care less my woman is with me cause she loves me, its a mutual agreement that we are in this lifestyle not a onesided decision.
I am sorry that you had the bad experience but dont blame yourself and roll with it not all of us are like that. As someone already said body language is a HUGE tell tale sign.
LDS Survey Results - - Wish we could put a poll on the census so we could find out exactly what percentage of utahns are swingers. I'm thinking 25% of couples swing.
Disabled Swingers - - I am the male half of a couple. I am also disabled and in a wheelchair. Add to that I am new to the lifestyle. Shelley my other half is a gorgeous BBW (on the smaller side of BBW). She was very active in the lifestyle prior to us getting married. We have had a couple threesomes in the beginning of our relationship. Now after 12 years of marriage I am finally secure enough in our relationship for us to become active again.
Yet we are finding it very difficult to actually find folks to play with and or parties that are accessible to my chair. We have had folks online come right out and tell us that if it was not for me being in a wheelchair they would have no problem meeting us. Heck we even had one couple come right out and ask me if Shelley would be willing to play solo cause they did not want to have anything to do with someone in a wheelchair (not from here).
So I guess what my question is, is there actually active disabled folks in the lifestyle and are there non disabled couples willing to get together with those of us who might have physical challenges. Or am I just going to be constantly rolling uphill?
Jeff
Where on Earth are all the hot Virginia Swingers? - Show us what you have to offer VA!!! - Virginia is for lovers! Everyone cum and have some fun!
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