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Is this one of your rules? What is it? is it fear? or something - Does everyone feel this way? - CLASSY:
Good topic! :)
Neither Siren nor myself have set any specific rules about time parameters being met before we'll play with a couple, but as always with many things in life...our playing has it's dynamics and nuances, which are always evolving.
So, to respond to a few of the questions you posed:
Fear of STD's? Not specifically.
Fear of thinking of ourselves as sluts? Absolutely not. Sometimes sluthood is fun!
Fear of others thinking we are sluts? We don't and have never given a patoot about what others think of us.
Values, morals? No way! We are "swingers" after all, and besides...we've both spent our time in an organized "forum" (former mormons), worrying about whether or not we were being "worthy" or if Jesus was happy with us; we're sooo done with that!
Do we have to BBQ before we'll fuck someone? What's the point of that? Besides...sometimes through the interaction of a BBQ you realize, "I really don't wanna boink this person."
If our kids have played together? Nah...children fall outside of the spectrum of the specific lifestyle. They're part of the social nature when we're not swinging with those that we have met during the course of our experiences. It's all good.
Is random sex scary? Well, yes it is...or it CAN be...but especially if you don't practice wisdom and are not reasonable by indulging in indiscriminate sex with EVERYONE you come across. There are some seriously scary-ass people out there! This question is along the same lines as the first question of fear of STD's.
Taboo? Well, hell...yes it is...and I believe that is part of the intrigue; part of the whole mind-game of swinging.
Bottom line: Siren and I have been known to play on first dates, and we've been known to wait a long time, and as can be expected have had a grab-bag of results. We never carry an agenda or ulterior motives (expectations) when we socialize or meet people. We can draw no conclusion using the good vs. bad experiences and if they were a first-time play or not.
We do, however, go with how we feel at any given moment and at any given event. You know...sometimes it just feels right and sometimes, the Mo-Jo is simply not there.
~J~
Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - Friday nights are lifestyle friendly. This Friday is Steampunk theme. Haven't seen tomorrow's password yet. Password just gets your cover waved. I think we'll be there tomorrow.
Lifestyle friendly camping - - Spring fever is TOTALLY kicking in right now! Being in the great state of Utah with all the wilderness and seclusion options with camping, I'm curious what kinds of lifestyle friendly camnpgrounds there are for those of us who are RV'ers? Do any of you have any experience with campgrounds like this or are there any camping type events held in the region which support us? I've always had this wild fantasy of being in a swingers camp and just roaming from one tent/rv to another like how they do it in Europe with the car parks....so naughty yet so much fun at the same time!
I'd love to hear about everyone's swinging camping experiences too!
'Lish
Disabled Swingers - - [quote=TWOBEARS]We don't post in the forum often but we feel this is a good time. Me being the male half of the couple and the wife being in a chair have been through this at the beginning. Sure there are people out there that for some reason have a problem, but you will find more people that are open to the experience. We have met cuntrybumpkins at parties and they are great people. We have met alot of great people from swingular that look at her as a person and dont even notice the chair and for that there have been many memorable times. Majesticwolf also very cool Naughty and Lucky the list goes on and we hope not to ofend the others by not mentioning them. We have even met Rob several years back and he is also an awesome person. The point is don't be discouraged, keep on getting out to meet people. One thing she would like to see is for people to just come right out and ask, to her that is the most polite way to get to know her and find out what her limitations are. Which are very few. twobears[/quote]
Awww, thank you!!! You guys are awesome, very cool people and we are the ones who are lucky to know you guys!! Kisses...Naugh-Ty
Couples oasis or Red Roister - Which do you prefer - "...in advanced stages of their lives or have been ridden way too hard and put away wet on far too many occasions."
You say that like it's a bad thing! All I know is that the last time we were at the Red Rooster (admittedly probably 10 years ago) we saw THE largest couple we've ever seen in a swing club (or possibly anywhere else!). By the time they got up the stairs (single file as the stairway is NOT ADA compliant) they were sweating SO hard and were SO out of breath that we made a break for it before they got their second wind and took their clothes off.
But you know what, good for them for being comfortable in their own...uh, skin and wanting to get their freak on in front of a small group of geriatric swingers. We did, out of morbid curiosity, scan the obituaries the next day because if someone there that night didn't have a coronary event then surely someone was crushed to death. And yes I'm a BAD person for saying that even if it's due to imbibing a WHOLE Redd's Wicked Apple Ale all by myself, on an empty stomach. Yeah, you heard it here first. The 'Doers KNOW how to party on a Saturday night! [em]Emo_57[/em]
Funny Joke About Forums - How Many Forum Members Does It Take to Change A Lightbulb? - :i Don't you all think this should have been posted under "Lifestyle Questions" since the basis of the inquiry was to determine how many forum posters from this, a swingers site, it would take to perform a given task? So, it is a question from a swinger about swingers... definately a "Lifestyle Question".
Sorta like this one:
"How many single men, on a swinger site, does it take to get 5 pages of forum comments from fellow swingers?"
Apparently 1 if he's from another planet and a profound tard.
Definately a lifestyle question.
:z just couldnt resist
Cruise - pricing - You guys are really bitching about paying $2000 for two people for a 7 day lifestyle takeover cruise? I heard Utah people were cheap but come on. Let's break that down per day... $285... per couple... per day... We've been many places that aren't nearly as nice as being on a cruise with 2100 swingers and paid a lot more than that for just hotel rooms. Throw in car rental and food and you're out even more.
So what if you're paying $600 more than what they charge for a regular cruise... you don't have to worry about children and you're around people you can actually have fun with. Sounds like the extra money is worth it to me. And have you ever been on ANY vacation when you fly? Add in airfare, liquor, tips and gratuities as well. You're not getting those things free on most other vacations anyways.
Did you go to SwingFest? The rooms there were $300 a night! So if you can't afford this cruise, don't knock the people who put it together, we've been waiting for something like this for a long time and they deserve to make a bit of money off this because I'm sure it wasn't easy.
And you're probably the ones who bitch about there never being any events or parties for lifestylers, then when someone puts one together, you bitch about it because they make a dollar for their efforts.
We'll be on the cruise and we'll be glad to see those who aren't cheap on there with us.
Thought on "E" - - We firmly believe that everyone should have the right to choose. People should be able to do whatever they want with their own lives. It's funny because people do look down on swinging or swingers yet we all meet here, exercising our right to choose our own lifestyle. Why should it be different with anything else ???? Swinging irresponsibly is very dangerous and can lead to stds that can ultimately end in death. Its quite possible that something may occur even if you thought you were playing it safe. Same with drugs ,they can be risky as well, and there isn't anyway to safeproof yourselves 100%. I think that everyone should just go on living their lives the way they see fit and not judge anyone else for the way they choose to live theirs.
Mrs. Crunk
Comfort level of casual vs relationships? - - We are still fairly new to this whole lifestyle shindig; just under a year. Trying to figure what aspects we like, don’t like and are just meh. I’m curious though, when it comes to forming emotional connections with other people how open are you to the idea?
If it’s a scale of 1 - 10. One being completely casual, “what was your name again” sex and two being “I deeply love you and want you to come live with me and my other two wives” sort of deal... where do you fall?
:::
For us we are discovering that we prefer the more connective experiences and don’t shy away from words like “love” or “relationship”. But we also love just super casual fun experiences. All of it entirely contingent on the people involved. So not quite true swingers but also not quite true poly.
Trying to see how common or uncommon that is.
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