Valley Park Swingers in Mississippi

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seniors - why is it so difficult to find senior swingers or single ladies? - why is it so difficult to find senior swingers or single females?

Mexico! Come with us!!! :) - Trying to put together a group of Swingers to go to Mexico with us! - I'm sure anyone on our friends list got the previous email about our trip to Mexico and wanting to put a trip together in the spring. If you didn't, well that's the gist of it! Our availability would be between May 9th-17th. Probably thinking 4-5 nights (we have a little one at home so that makes it hard for us to leave for too long) but I'm sure any of you that wanted to could stay longer/shorter could do that. We would probably plan one big group excursion (we did sailboating, snorkling, parasailing and shopping all in one excursion for one day for only $135 total for both of us combined and that wasn't even a group rate) to do one of the days and maybe the bar hopping one night? Other than that there are tons of other excursions to do, or lets face it laying around in the pool with the swim up bar sounds pretty amazing too! So if you are interested in joining us for an awesome vacation (we promise it will be one you NEVER forget!) please email me back. If you have Facebook let me know that too so I can give you the link to the resort and you can check out their fan site and also all our pictures from our trip. Otherwise here is the main website http://www.secretsresorts.com/ Start dreaming of sand, all inclusive amazing food and drinks, ocean-view swim up rooms, and 90 degree weather! -Erica and Ross

Here's something Ive been curious about - - Congrats on 10 years in the lifestyle, SLOW. We're old timers as well and have been doing this off and on since shortly after we got married. Over 25 years now! So I guess I can sort of see both points of view and contrary to the current rather negative societal attitude towards political correctness I have no trouble being firmly on the side of being kind to people and not labeling or belittling anyone regarding their participation in the lifestyle. Having said that, however, I can also see the viewpoint of some couples since when we first started swinging there really were no singles (or at least so few that we never met any) actively participating in the lifestyle. A few years later we met a few singles who would, say, hire a hooker to gain access to parties and events or sometimes convince a friend to act as sort of a swinging "beard" if you will, again to gain entry to swinging events. This was all pre-internet so connecting was considerably more difficult than it is now. To say that the internet changed swinging (for better or worse) is a HUGE understatement. I was talking to a guy (formerly single but now in a couple) recently about his experiences as both a SM and a couple in the lifestyle. His attitude had actually changed dramatically. It reminded me of former smokers who now are militantly anti-smoking. His argument (now that he's no longer single) was to take the couples and the singles and put them on separate websites and what do you have? He said you have a swingers site and a hookup site. I told him that there are some couples who actually seek out singles over other couples but he wasn't easily dissuaded. One final point he made that I thought perhaps was a valid point...he said when he first started out as a SM in swinging he thought that all or most of the married guys who enjoyed seeing their wives getting fucked were basically cuckolds or at very least not real men. He said it took him many years and a lot of different experiences to lose that mindset. He also said that now that he's part of a couple who is frequently contacted by single guys he sees that attitude (because he recognizes it from when he had it) far more often than not. He stated that he would guess that the VAST majority of those single guys who don't "get it", the bad apples if you will, the ones who ruin it for the few good guys have that attitude and mindset. He said that's why there will probably always be somewhat of a schism between singles and couples. Whew, that was a long fucking post. Hope it made sense. No more herb before posting, Mr. Evil! LOL

does anyone else go through periods of doubt? - as to whether this lifestyle is what they want? - You sound perfectly normal to me. Some people need a real connection with a person to make a connection, whether it be physical or otherwise. Some swingers (especially the men) can just do it with anybody, it's just something new, that's good enough. Personally, I like to have a strong physical attraction to someone before I consider sex with them. Another thing you mention, I believe is also similar to me, I'm a giver, not a receiver. I love to perform oral, men or women,(and I'm told I'm really good at it :)) but I'm not that good at receiving it (from either sex) until that person has really learned me(how I like to be touched or licked), and it may take a few times together, and sometimes either I or they don't have the patience, lol But performing it on others, especially when they're really enjoying it is a huge turn-on for me. So anyway the bottom line is...who's to say what's normal or not, don't worry about it. The lifestyle is mostly about being free to enjoy yourself and others. So, you like what you like, enjoy yourself, if others don't like it, let them move on.

Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - Posted By: XPLORR94248 Reply posted on: Nov 10, 2007 - 12:11 pm Poly people generally take issue with swinging as be strictly recreational SEX! and no love where as poly, supposedly, is love based not necessarily any sex....but sex usually is involved at some level. The attitude is that swinging is not a good thing that swinging is diametrically opposed to poly. So while there are some similarities in swinging and poly in that more and more swingers are looking for relationships, i.e., "friends with benefits" ; "Friends in and out of the bedroom". These friendships are based on attraction and sex after the attraction. Poly people take the concept that poly is based on loving someone and if sex happens then OK, but that love is the key and sex is at best secondary. I would say that swinging (full swap, soft swap) IS recreational sex. It ISN'T about falling in love with someone. That poly people would think swinging is bad because it is diametrically opposed to poly doesn't surprise me one bit. Kinda like me being a Grand Dragon of the KKK thinking that people who even can think of having a relationship with a black person are sick in the head. To a poly person, the only difference between them and a "normal" person is that they have more than one person with whom they have love in the relationship. "Normal" people also think spouse swapping is a bad idea too. Again, no surprise. I would say that swinging and poly have only one similarity and that is that they are having sex with somebody that they are not legally married to and the spouse is fine with it. Beyond that, I don't see the similarities.

bi mmf - I want a bi mmf - [quote=DFW_EDITOR]You'd be surprised how many couples who list as straight would be up for something like this, at least to some degree. Believe me.[/quote] yeah I am very surprised! I am on a swingers site right?

KSL swing story - - YOWSER! okay rob, i get a free beer next time i see ya when we go to the next party. yes, swingers that was me getting a beer at the bar in the ksl report! not even a michelob a bud light ( they were out upstairs). sheeesh, move to utah and get on ksl thru a swinger story, the american dream baby!.........damn it rob, now we will never get a seat at the parties with all the mormons coming to check'em out! LOL :*

What about the lifestyle didn't meet your expectations? - Preconceptions and disappointment. - I'm home bored, so stop here if you don't want to read a bunch of shite. lol. I think we both entered the lifestyle with some preconceived notions of what the people in the LS would be like, but that was mostly from our limited experience with being vanilla and having LS peeps try to hit on us. It just seemed creepy, desperate and gross at the time. We assumed most of the players would be super aggressive, ready to fuck anyone and have zero interest in relationships outside of sex. Our initial entry was simply to watch and be watched. We quickly learned that there are just as many wonderful people in the LS as out of it. Maybe more. There will always be the outliers, the few percentage on each end of the spectrum that are more extreme, but that happens in any population. Overall, it was a happy surprise. So that would be a negative expectation that wasn't met. As far as things we were hoping would happen or expectation that weren't met, we have very few. But we also went into the labyrinth without really expecting or assuming anything. I don't think we were naive enough to think that this segment of the population was somehow immune from the social characteristics that reveal themselves in any other social class or group. You will always have the "cool kids" the "shy people" the "jocks" the "geeks" the people who classify themselves as the "pity party" and blame the world for their problems. Those things will exist anywhere and should. Swingers are a diverse group of people with a few, maybe very few, common goals. Those goals I think are to meet others with social deviancy and those interested in expanding their sexual experiences or simply to meet new friends. Swinging, in itself, doesn't solidify your beliefs in anything else (politics, food preferences, choice of travel location, or even how or what you are looking for as swingers). I think that is where expectations can fail. If a person goes into a situation thinking, "I/we think "x" so everyone else must think "x" as well", they are bound to be disappointed. I've said this a lot of times, the lifestyle is not black and white. Life isn't black and white. There will be frustrations around every turn if you allow yourself to be duped into thinking your way of thinking is more than just your viewpoint, that it is universal to everyone. I see people complaining of flakes, people who meet once then run away, etc. That's how they roll. That's their truth. It's what they are comfortable with or wanting and who am I to judge. That being said, I don't have to associate with them and hopefully learn how to avoid that situation or become more efficient at finding people with similar interests. The lifestyle is work. Sometimes a lot of work. I think it's foolish to think that it should be easy to find 4 people who all jive. Think about how many people you have dated before settling on the right one for you. And to assume that somehow changes in the lifestyle and that after chatting on kik for a few weeks then meeting over drinks will somehow magically connect you. Ugh. Sometimes it happens. Sometimes not. But I wouldn't expect it. For others, the thought of any connection past the one-nighter is absurd. Why would you want to make friends with your fuck-buddies? It may be too risky and cause too many emotions. Point is, we are all different and that is what makes the journey so beautiful. And, just a note about flakes, since it is a recurrent theme. Yes, maybe there are more flakes in the lifestyle, but I'm guessing it's specifically related to the nature of the LS. Swinging for some can be very intimidating and frightening. Sometimes the chase is much more fun than the fucking. Not excusing them that do flake, it seems a problem for sure, but I think I understand, at least in part, why it happens so much. There is so much social pressure not to be in the lifestyle and most were brought up without it being the normal way to live. So society is telling us we are wrong, gross, deviant, etc. Add to that the fear of actually getting naked and fucking someone else and it can cause a lot of anxiety in some. When we first started we were petrified to even go the parties thinking it was going to be a fuck/rape fest. lol. Turned out we were wrong but it was a learning process. Lastly, if you are already treading carefully and the couple/person you are supposed to be meeting gives off any bad vibes, maybe flaking is best. It's hard not to hurt someone's feelings and honesty isn't always what happens. I know we have been honest with couples and it turned into a shit-show. Why don't you like us? If you only meet us and give us a chance we can prove we are wonderful. Other's like us, why don't you. It's hard to be honest at times about why there isn't a connection. May flaking be a way to spare feelings? I don't know. There are probably a plethora (Hefe, do you know what a plethora is?)of reasons people flake and some of those my be that they are just douches. But likely there are other people that aren't and are just trying to get out of a situation they are unfamiliar with. Avoid the douches but maybe give those others a second chance. Evil: always good topics you bring to the table. So you think because people like sex they should be good at it? I know a lot of people who love food but suck at cooking. haha. Maybe having too many options on the table can also make people lazy. I don't have to try hard if I know tomorrow is another partner. To some it's the quantity and not the quality. But I can see why the expectation would be there. All in all we really have no complaints. It's been a fascination journey. Some ups, some downs, but always and adventure. We will keep our expectations low, both of ourselves and those around us. Less disappointment that way. I'm going back to sitting in my underwear, drinking a beer and watching TV. Zero expectations. haha. :) Mr. SRO

Floridas's Finest Couples House Party February 14th!!!!! - FFC House Party - Cupid's Gone Wild! Valentine's Night Saturday, Feb. 14th (Northern Sarasota) 8:30pm - ??? Cum cuddle by the fireplace or enjoy an erotic Massage on our Massage Table! Swingers Texas Hold 'em and much, much more! Updated 2/4/2009 - The Hosts have asked if you can come dressed in something Pink, Red or White and as little clothing as you can get away with!!!!! Just bring your favorite drink (BYOB) and share Valentine's Day with friends!! Your Host and Hostest are inviting Swingular members and their friends at FFC to cum out and have some fun!!! RSVP !!!! ASAP !!!! email: [email protected] or [email protected] All details will be given individually when you RSVP.

Whats good for the goose is good for the gander... - - Just one last thought on the subject. I rarely post on these issues, but have to throw this in on this particular thread. I believe the basic question that we all have to ask ourselves is: "Why are we in the LifeStyle to begin with?" I will not presume to answer for anyone on here, but for my wife and I the particular reason is to spend our lives living not living to spend our lives. As far as all the single males, fatties, skinnies bashing that appears to be occurring, folks, we are missing the basic premise of the swinging lifestyle here. It is to meet new people, establish friendships and to reap the benefits of those friendships even if they are just someone to go get a burger with. Just because you are on a "Swingers" site, sex is not all that there is. We are just as happy finding folks that want to grab dinner and see a movie as we are playing around with. Building lasting relationships and having people that one can count on is more important than notching our bedposts. As far as the body weight issue is concerned, K has gone through quite an ordeal to lose over 100 pounds in the past 15 months (and she is looking very good!). To those folks that apply the HWP stipulation to their profiles. all I can suggest is that perhaps you should redefine your limitations. You could be missing out on not only some great friendships, but actually some pretty intense sexual experiences. Kitty, anyone that has anything negative for you should seriously step back and examine who they are, what they want, where they are in life and why they are in this particular lifestyle. And BTW, I am with you on your own little world thing! It is ALL about having fun, making friends and enjoying life. The limits that each individual or couple places upon themselves, is by their choice and I support that choice, but they only limit the experiences they will have in our exceptional community. Secrets, I totally agree with you on the being good at being ourselves point. However, sometimes the choices and perceptions that we have are too overwhelming. Let's face it, no one is born into this lifestyle and all of our ideas, conceptions and beliefs are based on what we learned in our formative years. For some, that includes the perfective (is that a word?) states of looks, shape and health. Is that the goals that should drive us in a lifestyle of this nature? One last thing.....Kendra, love the tat on your back, but MAN that had to hurt!