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This one time at Swingers Camp - Discussion about N by N camp out - again,you did a fantastic job setting this up. to bad i's only once a year. already looking forward to next year. thanks for a great weekend
jim/jan
Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - I guess I will make a much stronger response. The lifecoach is full of shit! My wife and I are both on second marriage and the previous ones fell apart because of cheating. It wasn't the sex it was the lies, the betrayal of trust. My wife and I love each other like crazy. Swinging is a recreational activity we could do without if we no longer like it. Even during swinging I am only sharing my wife's body, her heart belongs only to me and vise versa.
We didn't get into swinging to FIX anything. We got into it because we wanted to add to what is already great for us. It was not a replacement for something missing. our premise is making friends and if we have sex fine and if not we have a friend to do things with.
Also if anything swinging made me love my wife even more. Her love and trust for me cannot be affected even by me having sex with others. We have a couple of times swung (if that is the word) separately and she came back to tell me about it and did so with my knowledge that is what she was doing. And of course vise versa. We still trust each other and love each other. Plus while swinging I can see other men, or women, pleasing her and get a view of what she looks like from a different point of view than I have when making love to her.
As others have said, as long as you communicate, don't take things too personal, and maintain trust swinging will be fun and not hurt your relationship.
When I say don't take it personal I mean like one poster said you should be able to say "she give good head" or she is talented. LOL we had been with a guy in a threesome and the guy did something that I have never done and made the wife Cum really fast and hard. When she had recovered she blurt out without thinking "You have GOT to learn how to do that!!!!!"
It kind caught us both off guard but we laugh about it now. She didn't say "I love him more" She said "DAMN he has a technigue that send me through the roof!"
I have learned from the guy how to do it and have used the technique several times. Even if I can't duplicate it so what? She still LOVES what I do to her too. More importantly we still LOVE each other totally.
OK OK I willget off the soapbox. It just ticks me off that people who are supposed to be great at teaching relationships most of the time have relationships that suck yet they can tell you how to do it. BULL. Save the money for the LifeCoach and take a trip with a plane full of swingers and go to HEdonism III. It would be money better spent.
LOL I will quit now.
Professionals - - Some of our best friends work in retail and construction trades. Some are "professionals." But it IS relevant to how we interract and what everyone's expectations and comfort levels are.
If we were construction workers or farmers (for example), we wouldn't give a rat's ass who knew we were swingers. But our livelihoods could and would be dramatically impacted if it became common knowledge that we are swingers. This means a few things are done differently than they would be otherwise:
1. No public face pics.
2. No public names or detailed descriptions.
3. "You show us yours...we'll show you ours" policy with locals.
4. 99.9% "no locals" play policy.
5. When we do entertain locally, it must be discreet. If we go to a public place, there is no cross-couple PDA.
If it were not for our status in the community as "professionals" being a matter of eating and living indoors for us, we wouldn' have ANY of these guidelines. We know couples who have met couples publicly who are NOT "professionals" who simply could not respect their boundaries and risked their reputations (thus livelihoods) with inappropriate behavior even after being asked not to. It freaking happens! And it is one of the gravest forms of disrespect/disregard for someone to do this. You think I'm gonna walk into the convenience store where your wife works and stick my tongue down her throat in front of her boss? NOT! And it's the same thing for us when couples disrespect our discretion boundaries. It could force us into bankruptcy.
If you have a problem with that and think we're snobs because of it, screw you! Please don't contact us. :@
Rather than say all that in a profile, we tend to just play nice and say "we're an attractive professional couple..." ;)
How to find other swingers - - MissyVern
I think I read that the wristbands glowed under black light? Please consider having single straight males wristbands say something like :
Remember, put her desires first
or nice guys finish first
or ask not what the couple can do for you, but what you can do for the couple
Just a thought. Why not groom single guys into what you'd like them to be?
Long Weekend - Just wondering what people have planned - Is Fantasy Swingers Club new? Looks like we will need to check it out the next time we're down there.
This one time at Swingers Camp - Discussion about N by N camp out - Another fantastic adult camp out is in the bag. I enjoyed seeing quite a few of my old friends and making some new ones. See you all again next year.
WHY????? - - 1. I have seen a lot of talk here about grammar and correct spelling. How the people that don't have that down pack other's more educated would not listen to or spend the time on reading their post because it means they don't or didn't have the right schooling.... no not the right schooling but their votes sure count.
2. I've seen people calling other fellow swingers that share the same lifestyle call others redneck's, especially if they are from the South. Guess what they also vote.
3. I see a lot of talk about America being a racist country for hundreds of years, yes that is true and we all know that. Finally people have been opening their eyes to see that America is a melting pot and IF MOST of us look at our ancestry, we might have a little bit of Indian, Spanish, African, Irish, Dutch, German and so on. I know, I did it, born and raised in the small Island of Puerto Rico with a grandfather that is Dutch(his fathers side) and German(his mom's side) and a grandmother that is an Islander Indian(dad's side) and Spainard(mom side) mix. They got married in New Jersy in 1943, can you imagine the racism they went through, I can because I heard the stories out of their own mouths. All races that are US citizens also vote.
4. We are putting people down for the things mentioned above. People that have much more education that what I have or others have. One way or another isn't all of the above a form of discrimination? no am not pulling the racial or discrimination card because am spanish... I don't give a rats ass about that....
We are here posting, right or wrong, we are. Instead of the BS back and forth. I impel all the "educated ones" to post facts and where they got it from in order for the "uneducated ones" to learn the truth and choose the right candidate that is going to help AMERICA. By helping other fellow Americans, we might get the right person in office!
Tequila and others do post where they got their information and I thank them for trying to shed some light to others... Thank you guys....
By the way, sorry for my grammar and spelling. Like I said before, born and raised in Puerto Rico, became a very young mother with just a high school diploma........ until now that I am going for my education. Who knows I might be your next dentist and you not even know it's me.....
Other activities? - Do you only meet swingers for sex? - We meet on a pretty steady basis with a few cpls to go to a karaoke bar sometimes there is a after party and sometimes we simply just do karaoke and go home. We have been on nude boating outings, just soaking in hot tub, air shows, dinner all differnt kinds of activities with our swinging friends we mix a bit of socillizing with our swinging activities but evetually at some point most end up playing with us in the end
Discretion a Must?!? - Let us know - it worked in our favor, i used to work at a job and an advertising woman who i was very attracted to came in on occasion, she turned everyones head, found her and her man were swingers online much later... it was a good night :)
Question - do you talk about other swingers? - Smoke....
It's a fine line, being discreet and wanting to share bad experiences. I think you hit the nail on the head with your 'share with friends' comment.
I have a few couples that I spend time with who 'look out for me'. They know that I see single guys and are pretty frank with me when they have a bad experience. In fact, recently, I got an IM from one of them that started, "in your ongoing quest to find the ultimate single man, AVOID _______ at all costs" It was pretty funny.
I appreciate these people who look out for me...... you know who you are !!!
Better to share the great experiences eh?
Enjoy!
-Te
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