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Is this one of your rules? What is it? is it fear? or something - Does everyone feel this way? - CLASSY:
Good topic! :)
Neither Siren nor myself have set any specific rules about time parameters being met before we'll play with a couple, but as always with many things in life...our playing has it's dynamics and nuances, which are always evolving.
So, to respond to a few of the questions you posed:
Fear of STD's? Not specifically.
Fear of thinking of ourselves as sluts? Absolutely not. Sometimes sluthood is fun!
Fear of others thinking we are sluts? We don't and have never given a patoot about what others think of us.
Values, morals? No way! We are "swingers" after all, and besides...we've both spent our time in an organized "forum" (former mormons), worrying about whether or not we were being "worthy" or if Jesus was happy with us; we're sooo done with that!
Do we have to BBQ before we'll fuck someone? What's the point of that? Besides...sometimes through the interaction of a BBQ you realize, "I really don't wanna boink this person."
If our kids have played together? Nah...children fall outside of the spectrum of the specific lifestyle. They're part of the social nature when we're not swinging with those that we have met during the course of our experiences. It's all good.
Is random sex scary? Well, yes it is...or it CAN be...but especially if you don't practice wisdom and are not reasonable by indulging in indiscriminate sex with EVERYONE you come across. There are some seriously scary-ass people out there! This question is along the same lines as the first question of fear of STD's.
Taboo? Well, hell...yes it is...and I believe that is part of the intrigue; part of the whole mind-game of swinging.
Bottom line: Siren and I have been known to play on first dates, and we've been known to wait a long time, and as can be expected have had a grab-bag of results. We never carry an agenda or ulterior motives (expectations) when we socialize or meet people. We can draw no conclusion using the good vs. bad experiences and if they were a first-time play or not.
We do, however, go with how we feel at any given moment and at any given event. You know...sometimes it just feels right and sometimes, the Mo-Jo is simply not there.
~J~
Indiscretion - - we have a male friend we have known for years. he got a new girlfriend who seemed to be eager to try swinging, she had a few experiences, mostly with us, but then they broke up for other reasons. we still see him but didn't try to stay in contact with her. so just a couple of weeks ago we go to our favorite biker bar, where we are regulars, the band was playing and the place was packed. and there she is, all sexy and looking for a new man, and about half drunk, with horny guys hanging all around her. she was overjoyed to see us, the only people she really knew in the place. so she makes it a point to introduce us to all her new friends, most of them already knew us but not about the swinging part of it, they were just playing along with the drunk chick. then she announces in way too loud a voice "and they're swingers too!"
it was actually kind of funny, 2 other swinger couples we know were there and started sniggering. it is a biker bar, so no real harm done, and some other couples that we barely knew have been making it a point to get more friendly with us lately. so we got outed at our favorite hangout and the skies didn't fall in and nobody even seemed overly surprised or shocked. I didn't want to spoil her good mood, but the next day we called her and let her know that we would prefer to decide ourselves who we want to be privy to that information.
Swingers of Color - - We are hispanic.
Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - This is her 1959 Ford F-100 and I have a 1965 Chevy Suburban, and a 1970 Chevy Dually
Who is going to Younge swingers week HEDO? - anyone going? - Oh but you look so young and sexy!!!
Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - TEQUILAROSE
You are right spot on. The difference is that poly requires the relationship/commitment. Swinging doesn't..
Swinging is almost always a relationship with minimal commitment (commitment/relationship is wide open to the participants to dictate as they wish) required since the participants are usually already in a committed relationship. Here it branches, and there are three ways to go.
1 Swingers that are in a committed relationship (married or SO or single) and don't want someone that would interfere with that base relationship. Just enjoy some recreational sex with others (the vast majority). If they want to grow it beyond, then go for it and enjoy. (Least restritive of the bunch)
2 Cheaters and yes boys and girls, there are a lot of gals that fit this catagorie even if they are way outnumbered by males.
3 Married or otherwise in a not good relationship looking to explore more and find everything hunky dorie again. NOT A GOOD place to go.
Swinging is a place to go for recreational sex and then make the relationship/friendship whatever you want out of it. Anywhere from none to good friends.
Christian Swingers - - Posted By: TEQUILAROSE Reply posted on:
Aug 24, 2008 - 5:13 pm
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I am an Atheist myself.
well well well so are we lol
k & a
New Swingers Club in Utah - Gauging interest in new club - We agree as well. Several I've been to out of the country charge the same for a couple as a single male (which encourages single males to bring a date!). Also, women are ALWAYS free. Having a demonstration night would be great. For instance a BDSM themed room with a master teaching an audience. It's also a great setup for voyeurs and exhibitionists. Another room could have Symbian rides with a trainer. I've seen it done very nicely. PM me and I will be happy to share some club websites that I think are absolutely top notch!
seniors - why is it so difficult to find senior swingers or single ladies? - CLASSY,
I would hope that it is not sour. I am only trying to prevent disinformation. It is unfair to pigeon hole people based on locale. I think a lot of the issues here stem from differences in culture. Most apply their own upbringing as the standard for which is considered appropriate. If we are more open-minded about others view, we will often find the intent is good. I, like many, am guilty of letting my own perspective cloud my judgment. We are all guilty of it to some degree. It is the very reason wars are started. Human nature is plagued by this unfortunate trait. Anyway, my intent here is not to cause mayhem, only to express my opinion and promote tolerance.
-Don-
LDS Swingers Survey - Will any former/active LDS swingers take my survey? - Done
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