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Staying a couple in the lifestyle - - We've been at the LS nearly our entire 15 year marriage.. and we've always done things as a couple. Even way back when we were newly hatched swingers, we've always done it as a couple, and we've used our real names from the beginning, mostly because we're not creative enough to come up with fake names. Neither of us would make good actors, because we'd never respond to anything but our real names either 🤣
We started this together with equal gusto with the idea of having fun together while having sex with other people at the same time, and with people we want to be friends with, and not exclusively in the bedroom either.
Has it always worked out that way? No but that's okay. We've always still managed to have fun. Anything that we can experience with each other and share together has made it 100% worthwhile. The day we can't have fun doing this together is the day we go back to being sexually monogamous. Simple as that.
But the REAL secret to why we're still happily married is that there is one thing we do separately, which may be problematic for some.
It's scary sharing this, but here goes....
We don't share blankets. We can't do it. We've tried, and it doesn't work for us. We're both very needy in regards to tossing and turning and being wrapped in our own blankets. Plus, we've got our individual blanket needs that can't be met with exclusively with the same one.
Site activity - - [quote=Daddylikestowatch]Is it just us or does it seem site activity, the forums particularly, have declined significantly ? It seems active member participation has been lagging quite a bit and limited to a few “regulars”. Has everyone else jumped ship ? Is there another site getting a bigger following ? This is a shame, we have been on Swingular for several years now, and not particularly super active outside of the site, we still enjoy following and posting on the forums and staying connected with the community. We understand the administrators have for the most part abandoned this site for several years now, but was hoping at least the community would keep it going.[/quote]
We run a local discord group for Utah for swingers its not as robust for profiles and things but it makes the chats easy
sluts? what? - how so? - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET][quote=SHADOWINGWHISPERS][quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]There is a book called "The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities" written by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy that defines Slut in a positive light. They might be using slut in that context. The book has been very popular with swingers for quite a few years. [/quote]
I would hope they are using it in that sense.. but words that compile around the slut term make it strongly seem like it's a negative term.. sadly..[/quote]
If they are using it in a derogatory sense it may be because they are experiencing a certain level of self loathing because they are struggling to accept their own sexual nature or they may have peers and family that would do their best to destroy them were they to live so free as you are. I think that the anger that leads to name calling and judgment sometimes is a secondary emotion that people choose to embrace because the primary emotion is much more painful. They may want what you have but lack the confidence or courage to go find it for themselves and so the same people that call someone a slut in the derogatory sense far too often are the same people that go off and struggle with their own sexuality in dark places through lying, cheating, abuse and even darker acts while swimming in a sea of self loathing.
We should all jump up and down and be happy that you are free or striving to become free of such shackles![/quote]
That makes sense.. I hope everyone can undo the shackles!! Great understanding..
Black Ring, Right Hand - How to tell if someone's a swinger - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]
A lot of people secretly wish they could self liberate sexually and socially enough to do some of the things "swingers" do. If they know enough about the Utah swing scene to know why we are wearing a black ring on our right hands then there is a pretty good chance they envy our liberation maybe just a little.
[/quote]
I would not be surprised! :)
[quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]
I recently had a very LDS middle aged friend who knows we swing tell me when he grows up he wants to be me. We don't flaunt it before our vanilla friends and we are not trying to be spokes persons for swinging but we are really not ashamed of it.
[/quote]
Out of curiosity, do you consider wearing black rings all the time flaunting it?
Original humans as swingers? - Provocative theories based on Bonobo sexual behavior - I'm happy evolution took away our hair and did a lot of other cool stuff to us, but it's too bad we couldn't have latched onto that method of conflict resoultion.
Anyone interested in BDSM - Anyone interested in Bdsm? - Hello sexy people. Before we get a ton of replies suggesting specific kink sites we are aware of them and are not satisfied w the results
With all the open minded , sex positive attitudes of swingers we are hoping to meet likeminded people interested in any or all aspects of BDSM. Surely there must be some overlap on Swingilar with folks that like more extreme types of play? Just wondering...
Swingers in Draper cause Super Dell to speed - - After watching the KSL story we soon realized that it was closely tied to another story in the news lately. Super Dell Schanze from totally awesome computers was obviously speeding through the Draper neighborhood to get away from the crazy swinging people that live there! He only brandished his gun when he was confronted by a group of swingers trying to recruit him into thier sick and twisted lifestyle. It is all so clear now and he is obviously inoccent of all charges. We don't think we would drive throught that sick city if our lives depended on it! Who knows...they may force us to come out of our bubble and enjoy life!!!
Just our two cents
INCEST - Is it sooooooo wrong? - First of all I\'m not going to be the one running and hiding if I run into someone in my family.. I\'m not a native NCarolinian either... This is one of the Hot beds of swinging right now with some 15 clubs in the state and more opening all the time. As for incest.. that\'s been one of the bible belt\'s most prolific sports. Drunks, drugs and incest... None of which is condoned in the right winged religious groups.. These are groups where it is bad to drink dance lay with your brother if you\'re a man but as you look at the reality.... Ministers getting their perrisheners pregnant, having sex with their yungins, drinking till you cain\'t stand up and or usin drugs to keep the smell of the hogs outchur nose. We\'ve got ABC here ... Alcohol Beverage Control in NC.. Which controls what you can buy how much you pay but doesn\'t address drunks buying liquor.
Incest is the least of anyones worries here... Beard, I know of sisters and brothers in the lifestyle... they don\'t play with each other but belong to the same club. Sisters who play with each others husbands...Not sure how close that is and if\'n ya evha waches the Jayree Springa show yo\'ll see plenty of that stuff, incest, girl doing brother and sister doing sister and mother doing daughter etc.. and they aren\'t even swingers.... So have fun with the concept not with the deed... It\'s not going to change and nothing we or anyone can do about it... So I just have to laugh and keep my eyes open and check ID\'s.
Life\'s too short to worry too much about any single thing.. If you were given a month to live what would you worry about for that month??? I would hope nothing and be too busy just living.
Lifestyle friendly camping - - we go to one here in michigan it is a nude swingers camp and no one under 18 can come in we love it there
Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - Thanks! That might be a tall order to find a steampunk costume in late January.
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