Swingular - Swingers

Swingers Forum - FWB Anyone...???

line
Previous Post Next Post
We're an attractive, fit and fun couple looking for the same - FWB. We've dated 3 couples in the past 6 years and have had a blast! Since we've been in the LS for a while, we're picky and know what we want. We get a lot of friendship requests but no message to go along with it. We don't consider ourselves "swingers", we don't want to go to parties, not our jam but we do like to meet new people and see if the potential is there to be exclusive. It is hard making sure all 4 people have a connection but we've done it before and it has been fantastic so we know it can happen. Anyone interested...???

**Check out our profile and send us a message if you like what we're laying down ;)
Ya us too !
Definitely more fun when you have a connection! Just hanging out becomes the fun part and the sex is secondary.
Dinner, shootin the shiz and some drinky poo's is always a fun night
It sounds very similar. We get a lot of friend requests with no messages. It seems many either don’t have the ability to communicate or simply want to see your private photo albums.

Four way chemistry & attraction is so hard to find that we tend stay very near and dear to those that we do find.

For us, this is really about FRIENDSHIP first. If anything else were to happen (Soft Swap / Hard Swap), it would certainly be considered a bonus and not expected (it’s worth the effort) - definitely "with privileges" - and FUN! We're consider ourselves
upscale, classy, healthy, athletic...yet very down to earth. This is not a total lifestyle for us - more of a little recreation that we enjoy on occasion with special friends.

Good luck to all
Finding a 4 way connection is very hard but we have done it before and it was fantastic! We are in no rush, just wanted to put ourselves out there to see if any like minded people are interested.
Yeah, that's us! Sent you a message.
You guys are quite picky, and not giving couples a chance to connect with you! You shot us down in two seconds flat. Meeting couples shouldn’t be quite this hard yet you put much effort into looking for the holy magestic, which is why you not getting what you want. If you don’t give anyone the time of day when they contact you then I suppose your chasing a ghost (they don’t exist). There is a lot lot of like minded people, your not giving them the chance! One thing I noticed about this site is all the rules of engagement which even those who set the rules don’t follow those themselves (blind requests). Step out of your box and open yourself up and you’ll be surprised of what’s presented to you. Ken and Barbie do exist but they come with a shitty personality. Unless your ken and barbie...
^ We hear you. A long time ago we reached out to the OP to just chat, not even sure we were interested beyond that. We were promptly informed were not a match. LOL. We just appreciate that the OP responded. We also think it’s great that they know what they want. Nothing wrong there. The challenge is this is a LS site...they are not “Swingers.” They state this in their profile. They seem to want an exclusive relationship with another couple. Like a quad in polyamory. They seem to want to separately date the other spouse and have this 4 way relationship. I’m sure they will find it but it will be WAY harder than finding 2 unicorns to come play with you at the same time. What they seem to want isn’t what most of us think of as a FWB...it’s more of a poly thing. We truly wish them the best of luck, but it’s going to be tough for them. They probably could explain this more clearly in their profile and avoid having to reject all the Swingers contacting them from their posts on a swinger site. 😂
Have you considered just meeting couples, playing and letting it evolve into what you want? At times when one pushes too much, it doesn’t happen.
Yep all that. Truth is the psychology in this is really fucking complicated! Emotional master class. So much is assumed from a few lines in a profile, a short note or a couple of photos. Honestly we kinda suck at this! We sent them a email, they never replied... Did we brush them off that one time or not reply something? Why dont they reply?.. they suck!! We go to parties and it feels like no one wants to talk to us. Too old? too fat, too thin, too bald, too pretty? Too ugly.. Did she just smile at me? Wish they would smile at us... Maybe they wanna talk? Wow they did come over and talk, Shit..I was so nervous, did you get their names? No!!! Can you remember their names..Dammit. Yes attraction and chemistry for us is a must. Maybe we are too selective? Maybe we really should get try to know them. Not sure they really liked us ...
Yep there is a lot of emotions in this with 3 or 4 or more people its exponentially harder than dating, like that prom you hated only on crack. Sometimes you have to remember we are all human with all our faults and insecurities, No not everyone is going to like you. That is a good thing. Hopefully we all find that one(s) who do.:) Namaste AnM
im down
I think a lot of us pass up good or even GREAT matches looking for that elusive PERFECT match (And yes, Ms. Evil and I are guilty of this as well.) However, we've been very surprised how many times we've actually really enjoyed meeting and/or playing with people who initially, at least on paper, didn't appear to be a good match for us.

Unfortunately, it's hard to resist the very human impulse to discount a potential match based on even just one of two criteria (That, in the end, might not turn out to be that important after all.) on the mental lists we have in our heads when looking at someone's profile. Personally, we've ended up having a LOT more fun when we consciously decide to take Miles' advice in Risky Business, "Sometimes you've just gotta say, what the fuck!". LOL

I mean what's the WORST that could happen at least meeting someone because there is something intriguing about their profile or because they've said something that appeals to you in an email or a forum post? We've found that if we spend a little more time looking FOR reasons to meet and/or eventually play with other people rather than reasons NOT to that we almost never regret it.

Isn't there an old saying that in the end, it's the things you DON'T do that you regret more than the things you YOU do? YMMV ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
donniebman wrote:

You guys are quite picky, and not giving couples a chance to connect with you! You shot us down in two seconds flat. Meeting couples shouldn’t be quite this hard yet you put much effort into looking for the holy magestic, which is why you not getting what you want. If you don’t give anyone the time of day when they contact you then I suppose your chasing a ghost (they don’t exist). There is a lot lot of like minded people, your not giving them the chance! One thing I noticed about this site is all the rules of engagement which even those who set the rules don’t follow those themselves (blind requests). Step out of your box and open yourself up and you’ll be surprised of what’s presented to you. Ken and Barbie do exist but they come with a shitty personality. Unless your ken and barbie...
A little harsh but totally understand where you are coming from? We think a lot of us get into our own heads on letting something happen/progress. The Mrs is way better at looking last physical attraction than Mr. We have found the best times we have had were unexpected and we just enjoyed the company. Babsandbones is dead in that you need a black belt in psychology! If we could all just have a little more fun!!!
Yes, sometimes you've just gotta say, WTF! It doesn’t always mean you have to play with them, right?
Perfect 4 way matches may just be very hard to cum by in the lifestyle. Our philosophy is if we are attracted to you and we like what you have to say then we will take a chance and meet. If things dont work out thats ok because at least we tried. Like many of the previous posters have described everyone has preferences and thats ok. At the point you get bothered by others who turn you down then you should consider this lifestyle maybe not for you. Folks in Utah face other challenges because there are no official lifestyle clubs to meet others for just random sex.

However you choose to participate should be ok because thats your preference and everyone has got em. You should realize however that your own preferences may limit your ability to connect with others and just be okay with it because thats your decision as a couple and no one else's.
Dates are a great deal of fun. My wife and I enjoy some fun with other people and enjoy a connection that can increase the experience in the bedroom.
..