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Swingers Forum - Ways to point out Swingers in public

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Is there anyway to tell those in the life style vs those who aren't? Is there any thing In public to watch for or do to show we are? I have heard of like a pineapple in your cart while shopping haha but that's probably not accurate. Any advice is appreciated šŸ’—
We were thinking of designing and making a black ring to wear on your right hand. Just like a silicone band. Not sure how many of us would be interested
I like the black ring idea. Simple and discreet.
We agree. SOMEWHENTIME , where did you get yours? What type of ring would you all prefer? Do you like the idea of the silicone rings. Hell we could even print on it your preference. MW4MW OR MMF MFF whatever it may be.
I personally think we should all get tattoos. I do think the commercial with sling and swingers could be good way to test Waters. Use it as reference for a joke.
I like the black ring idea! Although my husband had a reaction to the silicon one we bought him so maybe would have to be something else.
I thought it was a pineapple upside down in your cart. I do it once in a while to see if I get a reaction from anyone.
Tungsten makes some quality rings for the lifestyle.
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I like the black idea, are couples using them ? We heard it was bananas in the fold out part of the shopping cart.
My wife bought me a super cool chevron stack ring (3 rings that stack together) by David Yurman. The middle ring is black. I wear it on my right hand and sometimes pull the 2 silver rings off and just wear the black middle ring. Iā€™m always on the look out for black rings. We have some friends that wear them.
We picked up the rings from Amazon a couple of years ago and where them when we go out. We have never been approached or any reaction from anyone. It use to be a bigger thing a few years back we heard.
The problem with the whole black ring thing is twofold. First, many people wear them now who aren't even close to being swingers. We see the silicone versions at the gym fairly often because you can lift with them without hurting your finger and I have at least half a dozen vanilla friends who wear black wedding bands (albeit on their left hands).

Second, if black rings for swingers (or ANY other surefire way to ID other swingers) ever really caught on it would quickly become common knowledge and most swingers would prefer their little hobby stay discreet and not public knowledge to their friends, family, and coworkers.

We were once at a lifestyle hotel takeover in San Diego and they issued wristbands to the guests. It took approximately two hours for the entire hotel staff to figure out what the wristbands meant (they were color-coded for sexual preference) and by the next morning you could walk to the adjacent mall and restaurants and people would look at you then immediately look down at your wrist and smile or even laugh and stare. People started trying to hide their wristbands and a few even removed them because they didn't enjoy the attention.

And all this was before social media became a thing. How long do you think it would take nowadays for black rings, or whatever, to become common knowledge? Don't get me wrong. I would LOVE a foolproof way to know who else is a swinger as I walk down the street but swinging is still looked down upon by most other people in the world and most swingers still don't want their private sex lives exposed to the world.
Just randomly point and announce..."hey look, theyre swingers" and see what kind of reaction you get from others around you. We have the black rings, but as not3d above that theyve become so common now by everyone that weve never had anyone react to them.
Well ok then I guess thatā€™s not the best idea lol.
^ all true, but if we see a black ring on a right hand AND a wedding ring on the left hand, weā€™re going to ask a few subtle questions to see if they are LS or not. Itā€™s just for fun, chances are still low they are LS. As far as picking LS couples out...pre-LS we wouldnā€™t know what to look for but now itā€™s not that hard. Watch them at a club and you can often tell. Itā€™s a fun game to play.
I wear a black silicone ring on my pinky finger. The silcone is more comfortable than a hard ring. But never had anyone acknowledge it was a swinger ring. Funny Story. On a first date with a girl that I had asked her # at a dance club. On the first date she said one of her past relationships was with a man that had been a swinger and she didn't want that again. She never swung as far as I know. Awkward! I'm sitting there with my ring on. I wish you couples would line me up with friends you think would enjoy the LS. Sorry, but I'm not getting married again till we have proven to be compatible over time, a long time. 17 years of loyal monogamy so don't give me shit about SM suck and are only validated once they are with a woman. I was happy as a vanilla but wanted to have more fun in many ways. No! sexual expression was not the reason I left. But if sure is fun to finally have my sexual freedom back. Not all will enter the LS by vanilla marriage turned swinger. Any suggestions on how to meet women who would like the LS are welcomed.
How about an item most of us have, swingers or not, but then wear it very differently!

No mater if a person is a swinger or not most of us have a wrist watch and when we wear it it's on the left wrist and face on the out side yes a lot of people don't bother to wear it anymore they just look at their phone, so not only wear it, but put it on the right wrist and face on the inside of the wrist, if someone calls you on it and either you don't fancy them or think they are vanilla just having a dig at you, then all you have to say is "Really, swingers wear their watch like this!" and say thanks as you are taking it off and moving it back to the other side! Latter you can move it back again.

Maybe not always wear it like this but when you are going to known or supposed Swinger hang out place, Bar's Etc would be a good way all "Wave a Flag" so to speak.

Just a thought
What? You don't have swingdar? LOL. I often just get a sense.
Iā€™ve seen 4 people sitting eating at a bar and they arenā€™t sitting with the person they showed up with. I figured that was a sign. Iā€™ve noticed it at prohibition.
Be bold and wear the uniform šŸ˜
There are signs. I feel like in the right environment, people pick up on each other. We have met tons of random lifestyle couples just by paying attention. We also wear black rings on our right hand when we are looking. It has worked a couple of times.
There is a group who issues you a pin at the start of the weekend with a small (letter of the host) on it, and that's how you know who else in a larger surrounding is part of the group. Obviously this would only work if there was a single, discreet, community-wide pin. All that said, isn't the discovery half the fun?
I wear an ankle bracelet on my right ankle, which is supposed to indicate we are into Swinging/Hotwifing.

Haven't had one person approach us, or appear to notice it at this point. But it's fun and naughty, so we still go out with it. :)
FUNCOUP4SEX wrote:

I wear an ankle bracelet on my right ankle, which is supposed to indicate we are into Swinging/Hotwifing.

Haven't had one person approach us, or appear to notice it at this point. But it's fun and naughty, so we still go out with it. :)


Ah yes, the old (hot) wives tale of the ankle bracelet. Got into a rather heated argument with a guy on the other swingsite we're on regarding that subject a few years ago. He was ADAMANT that it was a surefire way to identify other swingers as well as hotwives. I finally posted a pic of a group of tweens I saw down at City Creek Center...all wearing ankle bracelets.
HAHAHA Yeah, I wouldn't ever think it is a guarantee on any level. We always wonder when we see other women wearing them. But as you mention, it seems like A LOT of people wear them, so we would never approach someone based on that. :)

Hopefully at some point someone does approach us based on how i'm dressed, etc. But in our experience it means more for our playtime and fun than anyone else :)
How about black silicone ring on the pinkie finger - both male and female- match them and you have a swinger couple !! New code for all of us ??? Or 2 stacked rings on the pinkie meaning shared ?
BOOBERRIESJ wrote:

How about black silicone ring on the pinkie finger - both male and female- match them and you have a swinger couple !! New code for all of us ??? Or 2 stacked rings on the pinkie meaning shared ?


Again, how long do you think it would take...weeks, days, HOURS, before this spread via social media? If there was a surefire way to ID other swingers without outing yourself or them, believe me, some swinger would have figured it out by now. LOL

Besides, why is it such a big deal being able to find other swingers out in the vanilla world? For all the uncertainty and the very REAL possibility of misidentifying some vanilla as a swinger isn't it just easier to, say, go to a website where you KNOW everyone there is a swinger and, like, perv a bunch of profiles and shoot off a few emails and friend requests?

Now, if you like to "hunt" vanillas and try to seduce/corrupt/convert them then that's an altogether different thing. LOL
I too have had this question SO many times! Not only do I wish I had ā€œSwingdarā€ as 1DIVA put it, but I wish I could tell which women were into other women!
Life would be so much easier if I could read minds...
EVILDOERS wrote:

BOOBERRIESJ wrote:

How about black silicone ring on the pinkie finger - both male and female- match them and you have a swinger couple !! New code for all of us ??? Or 2 stacked rings on the pinkie meaning shared ?


Again, how long do you think it would take...weeks, days, HOURS, before this spread via social media? If there was a surefire way to ID other swingers without outing yourself or them, believe me, some swinger would have figured it out by now. LOL

Besides, why is it such a big deal being able to find other swingers out in the vanilla world? For all the uncertainty and the very REAL possibility of misidentifying some vanilla as a swinger isn't it just easier to, say, go to a website where you KNOW everyone there is a swinger and, like, perv a bunch of profiles and shoot off a few emails and friend requests?

Now, if you like to "hunt" vanillas and try to seduce/corrupt/convert them then that's an altogether different thing. LOL

We like how you think!!!
Weā€™ve also heard the black ring on right hand thing (no middle finger, that signifies asexuality). Mine is a black version of The One Ring from LOTR but Iā€™m a geek.
We heard that itā€™s a black ring on the pinky - if the couple both have the rings on it a sure bet ......
We heard that itā€™s a black ring on the pinky - if the couple both have the rings on it a sure bet ......