Question: Why is the LS scene so closely tied to the club scene?
So just a quick snapshot of us. We’re clean professional, normal people. We like normal things, family things, work things and sex....we’re very good at sex. But we’re also grown-ups, one of which really likes to be in bed by 11....10 is even better. (me)
Anyway, we’re interested in meeting a couple or single. We’’re interested in friendship and FWBship. We’re interested in couples dating. But we’re not interested in the party scene. For us that was a lifetime ago. It seems so many people are sewing sooo many wild oats at the same time.
I know that it is what it is at some point and if we just want a mild game night we should just go to the ward......but is there a middle ground?
I’m interested in hearing your comments.
So just a quick snapshot of us. We’re clean professional, normal people. We like normal things, family things, work things and sex....we’re very good at sex. But we’re also grown-ups, one of which really likes to be in bed by 11....10 is even better. (me)
Anyway, we’re interested in meeting a couple or single. We’’re interested in friendship and FWBship. We’re interested in couples dating. But we’re not interested in the party scene. For us that was a lifetime ago. It seems so many people are sewing sooo many wild oats at the same time.
I know that it is what it is at some point and if we just want a mild game night we should just go to the ward......but is there a middle ground?
I’m interested in hearing your comments.
We feel a lot like you. Busy life, family, careers, and so on. Although we do like to go out from time to time, and stay out until 11 or 12. Also, would like a FWB set up, then on those weekend "staycation" getaways you can have a night of fun (Park City, Downtown, etc.) with another couple and you don't need to worry. Trust,health and wellness are utmost important. Game nights, movies, yes...
We would be interested in having dinner & drinks sometime. Thanks for posting.
Cheers!
We would be interested in having dinner & drinks sometime. Thanks for posting.
Cheers!
We feel your pain, it’s seems like the only way to meet people is the club but how can you talk to someone when you can’t hear them! Not to mention nobody wants to see us dance😂. The late nights are rough when the kids wake you up early. We’re definitely still looking for some new friends that are on the same page as us!
This is exactly what we have been talking about on the board. We love to meet for dinner and casual conversation, and the opportunity to become friends first. Then if all parties are good with the group connection, then start with dipping your toes rather than diving into the deep end. That is when you become FWB.
Glad to hear other feel the same way. We too are not into parties and or huge group setting. Too much energy and not enough friendship being built. Just our opinion!
Glad to hear other feel the same way. We too are not into parties and or huge group setting. Too much energy and not enough friendship being built. Just our opinion!
Well said Ucouple, and others. I would love to meet you guys.
:-)
:-)
We used to go to coffee group that was comprised of people that were either swingers or poly or somewhere in between. It was fun! Lots of great conversations. We still know quite a few of the people that went. Yes people made sexual connections. We did! It worked because it was consistently held at the same time and same place every week. It was really invitation by word of mouth that got it started and kept in going for quite sometime. Friends inviting friends meeting new friends. Some weeks there were twenty people and some weeks there were four. Most weeks there were about ten. People move away and or their schedules change and eventually the group just sort of ended. We know it went on for about six months after our schedules caused us to rarely be able to go. It seems to us that if it is consistent and for people that live in the same general location it is more likely to work longer term.
We host the Venus game night. This is exactly the middle ground you are looking for. The game nights are laid back, fun, and the games have a sexual theme to them. There is no play during the game night and no loud music. Just a bunch of adults who get together, play some sexually related board games and things like cards against humanity, and whatnot. We have some drinks and get to know each other.
We are actually holding a game night tomorrow at a hotel in salt lake and still have a few spots open if you are interested in checking it out.
We feel your pain which is why we started the game nights. We have swelled in numbers as many others feel the same way, you are not alone. Come and hang out with us. It's on the events page and you can also signup for our Meetup group at www.meetup.com/venus-game-nights
Contact us if you'd like as well and we can chat about your ideas!
Mr. & Mrs. Caliana
We are actually holding a game night tomorrow at a hotel in salt lake and still have a few spots open if you are interested in checking it out.
We feel your pain which is why we started the game nights. We have swelled in numbers as many others feel the same way, you are not alone. Come and hang out with us. It's on the events page and you can also signup for our Meetup group at www.meetup.com/venus-game-nights
Contact us if you'd like as well and we can chat about your ideas!
Mr. & Mrs. Caliana
We have all the same feelings.
Would love to meet you guys
We don’t go to the clubs or the big parties, we do have a small group that we all get together and do things, camping, boating, etc. a lot of times it’s family oriented (kid friendly). We are not looking for a one night stand, we do like the friendships with benefits. If this is something you guys would be interested in let me know
😘
😘
this sounds like a good time for us newbies. Please add us to any invites.
We moved here about 5 years ago and became disenchanted with the local LS scene for the same reason. We'd prefer to have a few beers in the man cave while watching a football game with another laid back couple. That type of interaction also helps to cut through a lot of the bullshit that can be found at a club.
I'm surprised so many are feeling just like we do. This is a great group right here!!
We are over the club scene. Did it and it was not fun, too many young people who are socially inadequate and emotional. We don’t mind dancing at a bar but the club scene surpassed us years ago. Maybe that’s what happens when you have 4 kids and life revolves around their sports.
We’re definitely not into the club scene either. Although, the people watching at Moose Lounge was worth having to use hand signals to communicate on occasion. We attend many of the house parties to try and find the middle ground.
All y’all sound like our peeps! (p.s. I promise to never use the phase “all y’all“ in real life)
Mr. Ginger (Nate)
All y’all sound like our peeps! (p.s. I promise to never use the phase “all y’all“ in real life)
Mr. Ginger (Nate)
We couldn't agree more. We really enjoy being able to talk with another couple to get to know them without having to shout at a club. Everyone talks about seeing if you "click" with the other couple so wouldn't the ability to have a conversation be a key for thst? Thanks for starting this thread Ucouple.
This is exactly what we are looking for too. We enjoy a fun night out but we also enjoy quiet nights in, either way, we want to get to know another couple first. We have found it’s pretty hard to find others who are looking for the same things as us. It’s nice to know there are others out there!!
Us too! We have a nice space for all such kind 9f activities, gratefully. It's only 250 miles south. If any want a small no pressure get away, seriously, Let us know and we will see what we can do with our airbnb apartment which you could use for free as our guests. We would love to make community here, but the numberer small.
Well now, seems this is the group we fit in with....
We have always felt it was the same as why alcohol is so closely tied. To get the one partner tipsy so they lighten up and go farther than they would when completely sober.
We believe it’s best to have great friends, and if benefits are ever an option, then it should feel ok to play when sober.
Simples....
We have always felt it was the same as why alcohol is so closely tied. To get the one partner tipsy so they lighten up and go farther than they would when completely sober.
We believe it’s best to have great friends, and if benefits are ever an option, then it should feel ok to play when sober.
Simples....
We have said to ourselves before that 'we must be the worst swingers in the world'. We say this because sometimes we will get a text or email at 11pm and all it says is 'we are horny, lets meet and fuck'...hell we are already in bed and sometimes hubby is asleep.
For us it is about friendship first..dinner to get to know each other...movies, bowling, etc, etc and than when we all decide to play it is really fun and you actually know the others you are with and want to see them again. Seems like a lot of pressure to always be on call to play. We have very busy with work and life, a friend or two would be great. Don't get us wrong, we have met some amazing people through the lifestyle.
If you are close to us and would like to be friends...let us and let's met.
Thanks T and B
For us it is about friendship first..dinner to get to know each other...movies, bowling, etc, etc and than when we all decide to play it is really fun and you actually know the others you are with and want to see them again. Seems like a lot of pressure to always be on call to play. We have very busy with work and life, a friend or two would be great. Don't get us wrong, we have met some amazing people through the lifestyle.
If you are close to us and would like to be friends...let us and let's met.
Thanks T and B
We are very busy and are just looking for some fun friends .. To hang with and get to know then .. More with FWB Or just a casual fun when we can .. We are very clean fun and safe
We as well have been looking for the same things. Definitely not looking for the club scene. Looking for friends in and out of the bedroom, dating couples.
We would love to meet new people outside of a club atmosphere. Getting to know people and having fun if that happens. We haven’t found too many places to go or know about any type of gatherings. Life keeps us super busy at times like everyone. We would love to be included in any group that gets together and has a fun time
We co-host our big event on monthly bases(sinful Saturday) just so it allow us to get everyone together and bring new people to the group but thru out the year we host different events like camping and boating trips, Cancun trips, baseball games nights and smaller house parties. For us we love our friends and love establishing new friends and look at all the sex and other things as icing on the cake.
For host like our selves the bar & clubs make it easier to bring lots of people together in one area without over crowding our or someone else home,
For host like our selves the bar & clubs make it easier to bring lots of people together in one area without over crowding our or someone else home,
We have clubs (LS specific) in our hometown of Houston, it's not for us either. Many couples like to meet there because if your not quite what they had in mind there are other choices and you can be fairly anonymous also.
We prefer dating other couples and playing when things workout until everyone has had enough. That does require more planning and not everyone can make the commitment. Plus everyone has different parameters which do not always connect. Many get frustrated by this but it's just how things go.
Now a big LS event like Naughty in Nawlins will certainly test your abilities to stay up late but the fun is worth it.
We prefer dating other couples and playing when things workout until everyone has had enough. That does require more planning and not everyone can make the commitment. Plus everyone has different parameters which do not always connect. Many get frustrated by this but it's just how things go.
Now a big LS event like Naughty in Nawlins will certainly test your abilities to stay up late but the fun is worth it.
Ditto, feelings are mutual and glad to see there are others that feel the same. We're not into the bar/club scene type of meet n greets, it's difficult to have a conversation and get to know each other when you can't even hear each other without yelling. LOL We enjoy smaller house parties or meeting for dinner and/or drinks first where there is no pressure or expectations, just good conversation and getting to know others in the LS to see if there is a connection.
Wow, good to see how may similarly minded people there are you there.
Thanks for all the responses!
Thanks for all the responses!
My partner is not a newbie but I am and we are both too busy for the club scene as well. We hope o make good connections
I am a single mom with full-time job fairly new to the scene having a hard time meeting at group that wants to get together earlier. I have gone to a couple clubs in late night meet and greets and then I am exhausted for work in my kids the next day... I would love to find some
FWB to do fun things with and have play time as well.
T
FWB to do fun things with and have play time as well.
T
We would like to meet some new people and just go out and have a nice conversation and just have some fun
We enjoy meeting new like minded cpls with out the clubs in a more relaxed situation be is you get to know the other people better I think
Generally we don't go to the "club" stuff... but we hit a couple of the Meet n Greets, met people... now, we have a cool group that we can text, hang out at our place, play games, etc.
If you want to expand your circle (as we did) sometimes you have to move outside of your box a little.
P.S. - we are all about 2 on 2 in a restaurant as well. Easier to visit and get to know each other.
If you want to expand your circle (as we did) sometimes you have to move outside of your box a little.
P.S. - we are all about 2 on 2 in a restaurant as well. Easier to visit and get to know each other.
We are the same and would like to meet others the same.
We don't do the bars or ckubs. But we love a good house party or small get togetger.
SEXYRIDERS wrote:
We don't do the bars or clubs. But we love a good house party or small get together.
House parties are the best. We love to dance, so the club does get our attention!
Looks like someone should set up an "early to bed losers with kids and responsibilities" group. We'd be down! 
We feel the same.
The parties always start so late...we are thinking about an early bird friends group.
An early bird group would be AWESOME! Count Me In!!!!!😉
We feel the same way! We have busy schedules and lives, we tend to be in bed by 10pm since he works early mornings and long hours. We stay up on the weekends a little bit. We have children so it’s hard to just up and go out. We want friends who we can hang out with, a cupboard full of games we never play, and if things get taken to the bedroom then great, if not then awesome, we had a good time hanging out and having fun.
Early bird group sounds good to me..
We are also into the early bird thing. Our idea of a good time is sitting on the porch in the afternoon talking with some light food and drinks or on the water with the engine off and relaxing, enjoying the fresh air and each other. Just not that much into big groups.
...........................................I am bored on a Sunday, so going to waste a bit of time.
I have said this before and I will mention it again here. Often times people are looking for a black and white answer, a "this" or "that" or they tend to pigeonhole themselves into a place that feels comfortable to them. It is great that people can search for and find people of similar interests. The original question was why is the Utah scene so closely related to the club scene. To me, that isn't necessarily the way things are and so I am responding to shed a different insight into the question. How big is the club scene in Utah? I don't feel it is that big. We have the Moose Lounge on Fridays on a regular basis, we used to have Habits and then we have the parties that happen once a month or less frequently, such as the Sinful parties. Give or take a few other club locations and attendees.
The average attendance at the Moose Lounge is around 80 people every Friday. My guess is that this number is well under 10% of the swinging population in the area. Just estimating. This only happens once a week. If we only consider the weekend as play time (Friday and Saturday), which is also an inaccuracy since people do meet weekdays and Sunday as well, that means that only 5% of the population of swingers is actually attending the swinger club scene on the weekends. Certainly not a majority by any means.
Sinful is definitely a club scene. And maybe we should define "club". I will say that is an environment where there is a DJ or another form of music, often times on the loud side as people like to dance, has a dance area for such activities, and typically doesn't open until 9 or so at night. Sinful probably hosts on average 150 people on average (S&A, don't get mad if this number is off,lol) and these happen maybe once a month. Lets just round this high and say that is 20% of the swinger population. However, many that attend the Moose and other clubs are the same that attend Sinful. Similar crowd and often an overlap. So still nowhere near a majority, or even a large percent. In fact, quite the opposite. This scene is well in the minority.
So I am submitting that this really isn't and accurate assessment of the situation and based on more of a sense or feeling than actual fact.
What this tells us then is that most of the people in the lifestyle are not meeting at clubs and are not necessarily dancing and staying up until all hours of the night but are finding other avenues where they meet.
What other options are out there. Venus Game night, Kandy K, Sensual Massage... These venues are not club scenes, are a relaxed place and quiet enough to talk without "using hand signals". There still might be music and a dance floor, but there are certainly quite areas to talk, socialize and sometimes even fuck, if that is your scene. I would estimate that as many or more people attend these type of events and for most of these it is an older crowd who is more apt to be in bed at an earlier hour, though that is also an assumption and assumptions are obviously a poor way to derive information or determine a truth. I would question if any of the people in this forum have attending these more mellow parties and what they didn't like about that. The loud music is gone, it is a great way to meet many nice, non-pushy people with similar interests and since the crowd is a bit more mature (probably not the Venus parties) then there would be people of similar interests there. Now it may be of benefit of the party hosts to start earlier, say 6 or 7, so the activities can finish up earlier and I'm sure the hosts would entertain that if it was a common complaint.
Apart from these types of parties and club scenes the only other way to meet people in a group setting are house parties, although keep in mind the Sinful hosts to things outside of the club but the crowd will usually still be the same people who attend the Sinful Club parties so are probably younger and okay with staying up late and partying, so probably not for the majority of people responding on this forum looking for an early-to-bed group. Let's talk about house parties. The ones we host sometimes have upwards of 60 or 70 people. These are people we have met before, for the most part, and we don't invite random people to these. We have an area to dance, music, but also areas that are quiet. The party starts around 7 and goes until... whenever. 6 am at times, but many leave before that. These aren't orgy parties and people don't show up expecting that. We also do game nights where we have 3-5 couples over for games, drinks, no dancing, hot tub, etc. Also people we know. We have been to many house parties as well and it is usually people we have met before. We are very leery of parties where there is some expectation to show up and fuck. We avoid these. Not our scene. But these house parties are out there. The doors close at 9, naked by 10, fucking by 1015. You are expected to fuck someone. Definitely not for us but definitely an okay and acceptable thing for others. Judgment is such an incredibly hypocritical thing in the lifestyle and I am astounded by how many people judge others. It is one thing to not enjoy a certain thing and to stay away from it, but it demean it, negate the validity of it and try to reduce the people who do it is completely asinine. My point is there is a variety, a full spectrum to every aspect of the lifestyle. From people looking only to make friends to people only looking to fuck. There is no right and wrong or black and white.
We have so many good friends now that we feel super fortunate and blessed every day. But how did we meet those friends. Here is the key. Through hard work. Through dinner dates, clubs, social events, house parties and networking. Remember, this is my opinion, so please, readers, don't get offended. If you limit yourself to one avenue your success will be limited and you will have very few options in finding that fun couple that you click with. Many of our friends that we have met at a club typically like to be in bed at 10, or sometimes like to stay up late. Some of the people we have met in the most casual environment turn out to be crazy, fun party animals. I'm not saying if you don't attend the clubs you won't find what you are looking for especially since we have already determined that the club scene is so small. What I am saying is that if you are expecting a one-stop shop, or a fix-all, your success will be super limited. Your goal, I believe, is to meet as many people as possible and then sort through those you like and don't like until you are satisfied with your results. If you label the "club scene" as negative in your own mind, you might also be inadvertently labeling other fun activities and only reinforcing the confirmation bias you already have. Don't limit yourself to one way of finding friends, especially since it sounds like it isn't working that well for you now. We have found friends in every imaginable situation. Single dates, group dates, vacations, house parties and yes, clubs. I know our way works simply by the amount of amazing people that surround us and we call friends, and yes, some friends with benefits.
Taking the time to start a topic is a good idea. The people on here all seem to have a similar interest and maybe some of you will take advantage of that, meet, and if things align, you make new friends. Maybe there is a need for a group to form that meets around 6 and finishes around 10 where only wine is served and only soft music is playing in the background. If so, take the initiative and form such a group. Create your own success. Maybe there needs to be a better way to post smaller events where only a few couples are going camping, coffee drinking, or similar. And maybe it is on Swingular and just not being utilized correctly. I'm sure with enough feedback the site could be fitted with such a feature.
So don't despair. There are many, many people with similar interests and needs. You just have to find them. Each scene and venue has positives and negatives. Try to focus on the negative and utilize the resources that they are and you just might find your holy grail of FWB or what else it is you are looking for. Good job on the topic and hopefully that perfect couple is just around the corner.
Mr. SRO...................................................................................................
I have said this before and I will mention it again here. Often times people are looking for a black and white answer, a "this" or "that" or they tend to pigeonhole themselves into a place that feels comfortable to them. It is great that people can search for and find people of similar interests. The original question was why is the Utah scene so closely related to the club scene. To me, that isn't necessarily the way things are and so I am responding to shed a different insight into the question. How big is the club scene in Utah? I don't feel it is that big. We have the Moose Lounge on Fridays on a regular basis, we used to have Habits and then we have the parties that happen once a month or less frequently, such as the Sinful parties. Give or take a few other club locations and attendees.
The average attendance at the Moose Lounge is around 80 people every Friday. My guess is that this number is well under 10% of the swinging population in the area. Just estimating. This only happens once a week. If we only consider the weekend as play time (Friday and Saturday), which is also an inaccuracy since people do meet weekdays and Sunday as well, that means that only 5% of the population of swingers is actually attending the swinger club scene on the weekends. Certainly not a majority by any means.
Sinful is definitely a club scene. And maybe we should define "club". I will say that is an environment where there is a DJ or another form of music, often times on the loud side as people like to dance, has a dance area for such activities, and typically doesn't open until 9 or so at night. Sinful probably hosts on average 150 people on average (S&A, don't get mad if this number is off,lol) and these happen maybe once a month. Lets just round this high and say that is 20% of the swinger population. However, many that attend the Moose and other clubs are the same that attend Sinful. Similar crowd and often an overlap. So still nowhere near a majority, or even a large percent. In fact, quite the opposite. This scene is well in the minority.
So I am submitting that this really isn't and accurate assessment of the situation and based on more of a sense or feeling than actual fact.
What this tells us then is that most of the people in the lifestyle are not meeting at clubs and are not necessarily dancing and staying up until all hours of the night but are finding other avenues where they meet.
What other options are out there. Venus Game night, Kandy K, Sensual Massage... These venues are not club scenes, are a relaxed place and quiet enough to talk without "using hand signals". There still might be music and a dance floor, but there are certainly quite areas to talk, socialize and sometimes even fuck, if that is your scene. I would estimate that as many or more people attend these type of events and for most of these it is an older crowd who is more apt to be in bed at an earlier hour, though that is also an assumption and assumptions are obviously a poor way to derive information or determine a truth. I would question if any of the people in this forum have attending these more mellow parties and what they didn't like about that. The loud music is gone, it is a great way to meet many nice, non-pushy people with similar interests and since the crowd is a bit more mature (probably not the Venus parties) then there would be people of similar interests there. Now it may be of benefit of the party hosts to start earlier, say 6 or 7, so the activities can finish up earlier and I'm sure the hosts would entertain that if it was a common complaint.
Apart from these types of parties and club scenes the only other way to meet people in a group setting are house parties, although keep in mind the Sinful hosts to things outside of the club but the crowd will usually still be the same people who attend the Sinful Club parties so are probably younger and okay with staying up late and partying, so probably not for the majority of people responding on this forum looking for an early-to-bed group. Let's talk about house parties. The ones we host sometimes have upwards of 60 or 70 people. These are people we have met before, for the most part, and we don't invite random people to these. We have an area to dance, music, but also areas that are quiet. The party starts around 7 and goes until... whenever. 6 am at times, but many leave before that. These aren't orgy parties and people don't show up expecting that. We also do game nights where we have 3-5 couples over for games, drinks, no dancing, hot tub, etc. Also people we know. We have been to many house parties as well and it is usually people we have met before. We are very leery of parties where there is some expectation to show up and fuck. We avoid these. Not our scene. But these house parties are out there. The doors close at 9, naked by 10, fucking by 1015. You are expected to fuck someone. Definitely not for us but definitely an okay and acceptable thing for others. Judgment is such an incredibly hypocritical thing in the lifestyle and I am astounded by how many people judge others. It is one thing to not enjoy a certain thing and to stay away from it, but it demean it, negate the validity of it and try to reduce the people who do it is completely asinine. My point is there is a variety, a full spectrum to every aspect of the lifestyle. From people looking only to make friends to people only looking to fuck. There is no right and wrong or black and white.
We have so many good friends now that we feel super fortunate and blessed every day. But how did we meet those friends. Here is the key. Through hard work. Through dinner dates, clubs, social events, house parties and networking. Remember, this is my opinion, so please, readers, don't get offended. If you limit yourself to one avenue your success will be limited and you will have very few options in finding that fun couple that you click with. Many of our friends that we have met at a club typically like to be in bed at 10, or sometimes like to stay up late. Some of the people we have met in the most casual environment turn out to be crazy, fun party animals. I'm not saying if you don't attend the clubs you won't find what you are looking for especially since we have already determined that the club scene is so small. What I am saying is that if you are expecting a one-stop shop, or a fix-all, your success will be super limited. Your goal, I believe, is to meet as many people as possible and then sort through those you like and don't like until you are satisfied with your results. If you label the "club scene" as negative in your own mind, you might also be inadvertently labeling other fun activities and only reinforcing the confirmation bias you already have. Don't limit yourself to one way of finding friends, especially since it sounds like it isn't working that well for you now. We have found friends in every imaginable situation. Single dates, group dates, vacations, house parties and yes, clubs. I know our way works simply by the amount of amazing people that surround us and we call friends, and yes, some friends with benefits.
Taking the time to start a topic is a good idea. The people on here all seem to have a similar interest and maybe some of you will take advantage of that, meet, and if things align, you make new friends. Maybe there is a need for a group to form that meets around 6 and finishes around 10 where only wine is served and only soft music is playing in the background. If so, take the initiative and form such a group. Create your own success. Maybe there needs to be a better way to post smaller events where only a few couples are going camping, coffee drinking, or similar. And maybe it is on Swingular and just not being utilized correctly. I'm sure with enough feedback the site could be fitted with such a feature.
So don't despair. There are many, many people with similar interests and needs. You just have to find them. Each scene and venue has positives and negatives. Try to focus on the negative and utilize the resources that they are and you just might find your holy grail of FWB or what else it is you are looking for. Good job on the topic and hopefully that perfect couple is just around the corner.
Mr. SRO...................................................................................................
Holy moly....hey was a post! Thanks!
I agree with most of what you said. There was never any judgement and I think we’ll actually make it to the moose this weekend.
I agree a hundred percent that the experience is what you make it. We’ve always been treated really well and found the peeps on here to be very down to earth.
And swinging and the lifestyle aside I would still be a loser that wants to go to bed at a decent hour
I agree with most of what you said. There was never any judgement and I think we’ll actually make it to the moose this weekend.
I agree a hundred percent that the experience is what you make it. We’ve always been treated really well and found the peeps on here to be very down to earth.
And swinging and the lifestyle aside I would still be a loser that wants to go to bed at a decent hour
Ucouple, welcome. My thoughts weren't directed at you or anyone specifically. Just thoughts running through my brain. And we too, can be those losers who want to go to bed early.
PS. I've tried to edit the double post, but each time it doubles up. Blame the site. lol
PS. I've tried to edit the double post, but each time it doubles up. Blame the site. lol
We would love to be with you guys!
My wife and I are new to this lifestyle but so far we have had fun and met some awesome people. We have gone to the bar scene because that seems to be the way people met. But that is not us. We like to have some drinks and hang out but we are not night owls. I think a coffee group would be awesome. We could meet in a low pressure social setting then if we click we could hang out.
As a single male (when we are invited), it's hard to make any connections in a LOUD club. I have some female friends (whom I'm sure that many couples would love), but inviting them to a loud "swingers" environment, isn't always attractive to them. On the other hand, a quiet, more relaxed/intimate setting is much more desirable to the women that I hang with. Also, if a couple would be willing to take a chance on a single male, dinner and drinks might be a lot less threatening for everyone involved. No expectations.... just getting to know each other.
I agree with 442--I am an old widower and I am not invited or feel welcome to most swinger parties.I am looking for people that are willing to give me a try.George
Ucouple wrote:
Question: Why is the LS scene so closely tied to the club scene?
So just a quick snapshot of us. We’re clean professional, normal people. We like normal things, family things, work things and sex....we’re very good at sex. But we’re also grown-ups, one of which really likes to be in bed by 11....10 is even better. (me)
Anyway, we’re interested in meeting a couple or single. We’’re interested in friendship and FWBship. We’re interested in couples dating. But we’re not interested in the party scene. For us that was a lifetime ago. It seems so many people are sewing sooo many wild oats at the same time.
I know that it is what it is at some point and if we just want a mild game night we should just go to the ward......but is there a middle ground?
I’m interested in hearing your comments.
Nope, the lifestyle scene is tied to all sorts of venues. Just a few couples hanging together, house parties, clubs, parties, etc. What happens is that the good venues such as invitation only house parties are not advertised, they go by word of mouth. Our advice is to keep meeting as much people as you can using the public/ advertised venues and before you know it you will be invied to killer house parties a million times fun than a silly club or boring halloween party.
We agree with everything that's been said. The parties we have been to locally have all be far to loud to really meet anyone. As mentioned previously, we also love the idea of having a few beers in our man cave with a few couples and seeing where things go.
Like everyone else has mentioned we're also super busy, so even setting the time aside can be hard sometimes. But we always say it'd be nice to get a bunch of couples together in a consistent group at people's homes where everyone plays on a regular basis so everyone is comfortable with each other and risk is then reduced.
Like everyone else has mentioned we're also super busy, so even setting the time aside can be hard sometimes. But we always say it'd be nice to get a bunch of couples together in a consistent group at people's homes where everyone plays on a regular basis so everyone is comfortable with each other and risk is then reduced.
If any one is still doing the coffee group in Utah county we'd totally be game. Weekends would be best for us.