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HELP!!!!!!!!! I guess we need to work on our profile - - Maybe you could add a coupon for a free bowl of soup? That's always a big hit around the holiday shopping season.
If that doesn't work, be sure to add the lines about how in love you are with each other, how you are DD free and expect to stay that way, you are looking to spice up your great love life, and be sure to write NO SINGLE MALES!!! 3 times all in CAPS so people know you are REALLY serious... You don't want any of those sneaky little bastards squeaking through the cracks.
Oh yeah, don't forget to dress up your profile with those fancy MySpace backgrounds. Include a picture of your sportscar, boat, and two-headed squirrel that you caught while on your exotic vacation in Rexburg ID... these all get extra points.
Last but not least, you gotta have a closeup shot of your genitals. Who says that once you've seen 10,000 knobby/dried up peckers, they all look the same?
When in doubt, look at the profiles of other popular people on this site, read their clever ads, and do the old "copy and paste" routine. Just don't copy their pics, people may be disappointed when they are expecting Ben and Jennifer, and they end up meeting more common folk. Warning: Don't copy our profile. It is down right stupid and was obviously written by an ignoramous.
The bottom line... profiles are pretty much all the same. Writing some clever literary prose ain't gonna get you laid.
The only thing I've got going for me is a hot wife (bait), alcohol (to relax the spouse of the guy who wants to fuck my wife), and chloroform (to disable the other guy's wife when she finally decides "there ain't no way she's 'taking it for the team' with that crazy bastard! "
Oh yeah, one more thing.... I also was smart enough to move away from Utah to a place where there are good swinger clubs, lots of hot sexy swingers, and our law-makers aren't a bunch of old white haired guys, in funny underware, who think a good time involves green jello and an accordian player!
I gotta tell my former neighbors... I've been to "The Place" and it definitely is NOT in Utah. (Note: the Cirque at Snow Bird and Catherine's Area at Alta might be the closest exception to that last statement)
I hope that was helpful. Good luck with your profile.
:D
MSNBC Article on Swingers - actually a positive one :) - now who thinks her and her hubby are at that club every friday? LOL
Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - 84 Gremlin, a true classic and total chick magnet, not to mention the ultimate in class and status. Of course it also allows me to look down my nose at you "camaro" drivers. Also much more stylish than the Bentleys...;)
swingers parties - - Fl4, I can see you actually using that line....
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - I would like to point out one thing, when you are a single male you and you are straight and you want a couple then you bring nothing to table. You have nothing to offer the husband of the couple aside from a show but you are asking the man of the couple to share his wife with you with nothing more then a thank you in exchange, in most cases single men have a gf or wife but simply do not want to risk sharing them because they are afraid of losing them, having them leave or know thats what you want to start doing or will be trying to do or they do not want to take the effort and risk and time to get their partner involved.
There is also the point that alot of people have fetish's but I do not know alot of white couples that are interested in black men, not every woman like a cock over 8" either, there are some but we have not met very many and it seems to be a very select group and type of swinger. We have had single men in the past but those single men had the highest respect for our relationship, they also did not get anything right away and had to show their merit as a sincere person that wanted friendship but no emotional attachment. In this day and age of disease we also are very selective with the people we swing with for obvious reasons.
As a final note, if and when you find a female partner and she lives with you in a commited relationship if you are already not in one will you be willing to share her with another man with nothing in return? Ill be willing to bet like most couples you will seek only a single female to join you in a threeway.
Swingers of Color - - Thanks for all the replys!
Was it all our fault that... - - ...Moroni got hit by lightning yesterday?
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1) Yup. We were VERY naughty at the party Sat. night. Sorry, Moroni.
2) It's not us swingers who are evil, it's all that gay marriage and war on Christmas stuff.
3) OMG, that's the funniest thing I've seen all day.
4) That does it. We're confessing and going back to church...just as soon as we have the gang bang we're planning for our birthdays.
5) Actually I'm 100% shocked I haven't been struck by lightning yet!
6) (Insert apocalyptic end of the world scripture here)
7) Why couldn't it have hit the capital rotunda...while the legislature was in session?
8) I KNEW I should have given up masturbating for Lent.
9) Oh well, they'll likely put up a statue of Donald Trump there now anyway.
Swingers of Color - - I have me a hot asian man! It was my idea to begin trying new sexual encounters, but it was him that signed us up with a bunch of sites and leads the way when it come to meeting new people.
B
Swinger & 🦄 Bait - An experiment to attract swingers and unicorns. - Stopped at the Draper, UT Harmon’s today. Searched and searched. No sign of any LS folk.
Did find some yummy Bread Cheese and Goat Cheese. Is there such a thing as unicorn cheese? Anyone ever milk a unicorn?
swingers helper... - I know some of us need this every now and again... - Would you wear this?
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